 Your coca-cola bottler presents Claudia based on the famous play and novels by Rose Franken Brought to you transcribed Monday through Friday by your friendly neighbor who bottles coca-cola Relax and while you're listening refresh yourself. Have a coke and now Claudia The paper says going to be a beautiful day tomorrow clear and brisk in perfect football weather You really like football don't today sure do it's a man's game. Well, that's not enough reason to like it It's a very exciting complicated game. There's a lot to it. There's a lot more to it than meets the eye I can never see the ball. I'm always looking at the wrong man the one who doesn't have it That's called a fake. It certainly is but it's meant to fool the other team. I think it only fools me Mama aren't you jealous? You aren't going to the game tomorrow the big game Oh, I'm green with envy. Yeah, you're me throwing you jealous looks. You're all excited about it a darling You meet a lot of my college friends. We're sitting with my class. What were you 38 or 39 39 Next year is my 10th anniversary Good heavens how time flies. I'd like to have known you while you were at college Maybe I should have gone to college. I wonder what I would have been like it would have been expelled I could hardly get to finish high school. Well college is different David, please explain to me about football. I thought you knew all about it Well, I know that the object is to carry the ball down the field across all those white lines and that one team tries to keep the other team from doing it and they get turns at it and Every now and then they kick the ball and that's why it's called football Well, I think you have a very clear picture of the whole process. I have Well, then why am I so confused that is the natural state of your mind Hope it won't be cold my feet just die when it's too cold wear galoshes You mean I should meet your friends wearing galoshes Everybody wears galoshes in a football game. Oh, not I you don't go to football games Mama, don't you care what David's friends think of David's wife? Not much I just as leave they say to themselves that David's wife wears galoshes than for you to come home with pneumonia I never get pneumonia more luck than brains. We'll have a box lunch. If there's anything I hate. It's a box lunch I love box lunches. They always taste different from food on the table and coffee out of a thermos Is there anything is good mm-hmm coffee and a cup you're such a killjoy I'm not going to a football game with sandwiches tucked under my arm I've said anything about tucked under your arm You will be sorry if you don't let me take a box lunch and you get hungry. They sell hot dogs I prefer a box lunches. They remind me of picnics They're half the point of going to a football game. I don't think you like football Of course, I like football. I think Claudia likes anything where there are mobs of people and a box lunch under her arm David, please explain to me about the game is dreadful going someplace and being ignorant. You want to know what wait I got my pipe. I don't seem to have it on maybe you left it in the dining room after dinner Yeah, that must be where it is. I've got a pencil and paper quality. All right He's so excited mama just like a little boy. It's his team that's playing they're supposed to win I don't know. I just couldn't get so excited about it. Even if I were a man I don't think you like football. I hate it. So do I I even hate it in the movies and on the radio No question of it. It's a man's game. I'm glad you don't like it either mama I don't feel so lonesome. Maybe you'll like it better watching it in person. Oh, no, it's worse At home at least I'm warm and comfortable and I don't have to wear layers of clothing You talk like an old woman. Well football makes me feel like an old woman Everybody's shrieking and howling All I do is worry until the last man has been knocked down picks himself up. It's so rough That's why they wear all that padding so they won't get hurt David says that hmm I know why they wear all that padding All it does is make them look so fierce and they get hurt anyway I'm really not excited about going at all. That is a masterpiece of understatement But don't tell David it's months ago that he ordered these tickets. So just pretend you're thrilled Yeah, easy for you to say you're not going thank heavens. I'm not if only it would rain Stop hoping you'll only have to go in the rain. They play football in the rain too rain snow or shine Why couldn't I have married a man who didn't go to college at all? Are you complaining? Certainly am Maybe it won't be so bad Least I'll be with David and it'll be fun watching him get all excited Mama aren't men amazing. They enjoy things so much. Who enjoys things so much men or don't women Different things. You have the pencil and paper ready. I have You know, it's swell having a wife who's interested just as interested in this sort of thing as you are you catching cold. I Couldn't have married one if she's been one of those Nambi Pambi women. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, I hear it Man's got to have a woman who is a companion Now come on darling. I explain the game to me from the other pencil now. Now. You see it's not very complicated. Yes, David Don't you wish you were going to Mrs. Brown? Well, mama if you're dying to go why I'll give you my ticket Don't sacrifice yourself. Oh, I'm not it's it's worth it to me to see you happy You and David are going to the football game. I shall stay at home and mind Bobby and like it Why should you have all the fun? Oh, uh, David Explain me the game quick before I say anything. I oughtn't to right here. I'll draw it out for you Now there you are now there are 11 men on the team. I thought there were nine. That's baseball Well, I was a person supposed to remember 11 men on the team from each player certain position and their tackles and the ends The ends of what just the ends the left end and the right end but an end there's always two something David Well, it just means that they play the right end of the left end of the field That's all There's a right end and a left end and where the goalposts are that's the top and bottom one thing at a time now Now there are the tackles and the ends and the guards and the backs the backs of what? The backs they they play in the backfielder It's too complicated what backs the half backs and the full backs and the drawbacks very funny What position did you play darling a half back, but I wasn't on the varsity half back That must be the best position on the team now That's the one I have to watch David you have to point out all the half backs to me I can just see what kind of a football game this is going to be is getting interesting go on now the field is 100-yard long Right if you say so and all those lines that go across it I know to a bird that field must look like a big wash boy. She's so domestic Yes, well now those lines are five yards apart. What's five guys those little white lines by guys apart What's so amazing about them nothing go on now the team that has the ball What's the team right on here? That's supposed to carry it. They're supposed to carry for ten yards. Is that all that's all Well, you can't go very far going only ten yards. Are you listening to me? I'm listening I'm only trying to be intelligent. Well stop trying so hard. Yes, sir Now a cheap team gets four chances to travel ten yards and I think it'd be much of a struggle that go on measly ten yards I can go ten yards in my eyes. Yes, but there's no one trying to keep you from going ten yards Well, I should hope not now each team gets four chances to travel ten yards Now each of those chances is called a down a down Like a feather down like a feather. I suppose it's called a down because everybody's falling on their faces Don on their hands and knees. Yes, that might be the reason now. I hope nobody gets hurt tomorrow, David I'd hate it if somebody got hurt since when are you so squeamish? It seems so silly getting hurt just playing a game I'm glad you're not playing David. All I do is worry. Thank you Now as I was saying if the team makes ten yards and the four downs they have a chance to make another ten yard Is that all there is to it? Well, it's a little more complicated than that. I should think the team who has the ball would win. No, I Give up mother. I don't blame you David. Claudia even I understand Well, you've lived a lot longer than I have mama. Maybe I just ought to wait until tomorrow and explain it as it goes along David Sometimes they throw the ball That's called a pass Because it passes right by the man who's supposed to catch it is that why no, that's not why Why don't you just let her find out for herself? Why don't we just take a radio and I can listen to it while the game is going on and then I'll know what's Happening with a portable radio under my arm. It's a rank insult to who worse than a lunchbox Nice the telephone. Well answers. It's right here at my elbow. If it's for me. I'm home. You always think it's for you Hello, oh, yes, oh, oh Hello, mr. Gankin. Oh, you're in New York No, no, we didn't expect you. Oh You flew in for the football game good Hmm. Hmm. Oh Your team's playing in New York. I see Well, it's awfully night. That's nice of you to invite me, but Oh, yes, yes, I like football very much. Oh You're flying back right after game. No, I know Well, well, no, I suppose it wouldn't be any other time to see you but Well, you talking yet. Well, it's nice of you to ask me. I Yes, yes, I accept. I'd be glad to join you Yes, I do want to discuss that revision on the South ramp for your freight terminal. Yes, I'll I'll I'll Yeah, yeah, well Yeah, I'll I'll meet you in town at 12 o'clock at your at your hotel. Yes, that's right. That's a date That's goodbye. Mr. Kangton David you what and darling, I'm awfully sorry, but David is it what I think it is It is Kangton's in town. He wants me to go to football game with him tomorrow Well, I don't blame him and it is sort of necessary for business. Go on. So I just had to accept You had to. Yeah, I Had to but you were going to a football game already. I know you were taking me. You don't have to tell me Oh, you know I know but And I'm I'm afraid I just won't be able to go with you. I'm I'm sorry darling David. I understand that you have to see mr. Carrington You do sure. So I won't be too disappointed that I have to stay home And you have to stay home Oh, no, no, no, no, no, there's no reason for you to stay home But I I I want to stay home. Why I wouldn't dream of going without you. Well, you're all the fun Darling, you're being a swell sport, but I I know how you've been looking forward to this and you're going to go to that game Really? I So's mama going with you. Yes, mrs. Brown in my place, but David. No, no, no, no, no, no, don't protest I've watched you all evening. You've just been dying to go to that ball game and you didn't want me to know it Now now confess. I won't confess any such thing. Then it's all settled. You girls are going to one ball game together And I'm going to another with mr. Carrington and that's that ha ha that's that Mama, did you hear that laugh? He laughs like a demon. He is a demon. What's more, David must we It's no use claudia. You must and you'll enjoy it I suppose we must David explain to me about the half backs now there are the tackles and the ends and the guards and the backs Now the backs are in the back feet Students of work habits have found that the average person can't keep going at a steady pace indefinitely And that's as true for you who work at home as it is for people in offices and factories When you feel the need of a change of pace go to the refrigerator get a nice cold bottle of coca-cola Pause and refresh yourself Any job goes easier when you work refreshed Mr. King, how would you like two tickets for a very fine football game tomorrow? Why I I have two tickets already. Thank you Oh I thought perhaps that you Well, I guess there's nothing left to do but claudia and I to go together Or maybe you'll enjoy it. I don't expect to but I'll try Oh, why do these things always have to happen to me? Well, these things and a lot more happen to your daughter Just what do you mean by a lot more? Well on monday. It's a little matter of a break us with the telephone company Oh dear. Oh, not claudia's fault. It's just that san francisco calls. Who do we know in san francisco? That's what claudia wonders too Will we see you around on monday miss brown? I'll do my best Every day monday through friday claudia comes to you transcribed with the best wishes of your friendly neighbor who bottles coca-cola So listen again monday at the same time And now this is joe king saying or of war and remember Whoever you are whatever you do wherever you may be When you think of refreshment think of coca-cola For coca-cola makes any pause the pause that refreshes and ice cold coca-cola is everywhere The parts of claudia and david on this program were played by catherine bard and paul crabtree And the entire production is supervised and directed by william brown maloney And now here's a word from your friendly neighbor who bottles coca-cola