 Hi guys evil dear here. So today I wanted to speak about another story about my honeymoon in Europe and particularly this time in France Now see we were at the end of our trip in France would be in there for I think two days We're actually in Paris. Sorry, I should be specific about these things So we were in Paris and we're just about to leave now. We went to the train station We're gonna catch a trip. We're gonna take a train which would take probably better You know, I think it's like four or five hours to get down to Bacelona. So it's a long trip Well, maybe it's more than that maybe six hours. I can't remember Anyway, so it's a long trip and I'm sitting here at the train station me my missus. We've got our bags I've got like two giant luggage bags. She's got like a little carry-on ones type of thing And we're just sitting down and I'm reading the screen up there and saying boom boom, you know 30 minutes before the train goes So I'm like, okay, that's good. You know a little bit of relaxation time. It's 11 in the morning. It's all good My missus goes There's a makeup shop over there. I want to go check that out and I'm like none. I know stay here Let's just wait because I don't want to miss this train, you know, this is a lot of money She's like, ah, I'll be back soon. Stop being so pestering and annoying. I'm like fine fine fine Come right back here. This is where I'm gonna be waiting for you. And she's like, yeah. Yeah sure sure sure so anyway, she takes off and I'm sitting here and I'm playing with my my iPhone just looking at stuff and I look at the time they go 15 minutes before the train goes like when she coming back and then I keep playing with my phone I think much about it five minutes before the train's going. I'm like, okay I'm standing up all stress going where is she like How does she just get lost like she literally went over to the shop just over there like how does she get lost? And I'm like, okay, that's it quickly. I better run over. So I'll run over and have a look in the shop No sign of her looking the shops nearby still no sign of her. I'm literally flipping out at this point I'm like, what do I do? I just have to wait by the train and hope that she comes now most people think Evil dear, why don't you just pick up your telephone and give her a phone call? You know that thing that you had sitting in your pocket. Yeah, well, it doesn't quite work like that See, I had my phone which had international roaming. Well, it had some international roaming left But her phone was completely flat I remember that because I tried to do something with her phone previously And she's like no no no my phone's flat and plus I've got no international roaming So we can't use my phone and I'm like, why don't you organize that and she's like, I don't need it I think I wasted money. Anyway, so I can't call her. I'm sitting here by the train waiting to leave and then the inevitable happens. I Watch the train as it slowly goes away And guess what still no misses. So at this point, I'm like, I can I've got two options I can sit here and wait for her to come back thinking that maybe she just got lost in some shop looking at the products And randomly at some point is gonna go and then come running back to me Or I could go looking for her and hope for the best that I just randomly stumbled into the shop where she's at So I'm thinking hmm Well, I really don't want to go walking away because if I go she will possibly come back and then she'll be like Oh, no, where is he and then she'll run away and you know, it just just becomes cat and mouse game in Paris Where none of us know anything. We don't speak French. Luckily a lot of French people speak English But yeah, we don't speak French Anyway, so I'm sitting here and then like an hour passes. I'm like, no, she's not coming back. I really hope like You know, someone hasn't stabbed her and taken her wallet or something and soon as I thought about that. I went oh God, she's got all the carry-on bags. She's got my wallet. She's got my passport. She's got everything I don't have anything but my phone and you know what just as I'm thinking in my phone I look down at it 20% power left and Unlike I've got a charger, but where am I gonna plug it? I'm in a train station So now I'm stressing not just about the fact that she's not gonna come back. I'm stressing about the fact that I got no money So she's like, you know, just decide to pack up and go. Yeah, I'm sick of this man I'm just gonna ditch him here in Paris and catch an international flight home. I'm screwed. I don't have anything now. So That's an hour's past. I'm at this point literally flipping out And I'm going up to like the little information stands and like hi, sorry. I didn't speak French But could you possibly call, you know, the big train thingy to you know, call her name out and the guy sitting here He clearly understands English, but he's ignoring me. He's like No Don't understand don't understand. I'm like fun and I start getting tricky. I try to use Esperanto and he's just looking at me like You just sound like you're trying to bastardize French right now. I'm not gonna talk to you like he's given me that look I know he understands me, but he's purposely ignoring me I think it's some of that old English French hatred going on right there, but I'm Australian I'm not part of that. Anyway back to the story. So At this point, I'm like, what do I do? I've just got to wait for you know Wait possibly for a phone call or to keep walking around station. I'm walking around looking in shops and stuff My phone's down to 5% now and I know she knows my number, but If my phone goes flat, we will never find each other like literally So I'm thinking okay. I need to power this phone. So what do I do? Okay? I look around. Oh, yeah, there's a vending machine over there. They need power So I walk over the vending machine. I'm like, hey, I've got this sort of just unplugged that vending machine and plug my phone right in there And I'll be all sweet and right at that moment some big burly security guy goes sits down right in front of it just goes Pulls out his phone just starts looking at it. I'm like Freaking kidding me. So I walk around there's no freaking more vending machines anywhere and it got to this point Where well just swapping arms it got to this point where I'm walking down the street going what am I gonna do? What am I gonna do my phones now on like 2% battery and the most random thing in the world happen I happen to walk past this shop that sells exercise equipment and right at the front of the shop They've got this bike it powers your phone while you ride it and I'm like That might work So I plug my phone into it and I start riding and I'm riding and I'm riding I'm like Dum dum dum dum dum dum you know all shaking about ten minutes passes 1% and I'm like Are you kidding me? I'm gonna have to do like a full freaking eight hour workout to charge my phone So I'm just sitting here. I'm just riding away trying to charge this phone And then this random shopkeeper just keeps coming out every like, I don't know like ten minutes going Do you like the bike? I don't know how to do a French accent. Sorry. Do you like the bike? Do you want to discuss purchase type of thing and I'm like No, I'm just trying it out like sweat pouring out of my face. No, it's all good You know, I've really good put this thing through it's and you know put it through it the real the real test And she's like, okay walks away comes back ten minutes later. I'm like Sweating like completely Like covered in water like someone's just thrown a bucket of water at me time thing She's like, are you sure I can like look I'm just gonna be honest with you right now I seriously need to charge my phone and I've got nowhere to go Please don't kick me out and she's like I kind of figured that out half an hour ago Just keep riding the bike. It's all good. It looks good for the customers. I'm like, okay. I'll keep doing that Time thing. I'm always dying at this point After a while the phone gets to 60% and like look I'm done in that's it I can't do no more I get off this bike and I walk back to the train station sit down at the point where we were meant to meet and Guess what ring ring ring ring Okay, there's phone call from some random number and I answer it and it's my missus on the other end She's like And I'm like it just calm down woman. I understand that cry anywhere I've heard that a million times and I'm like, well, where the hell are you and she's like And I'm like, no, where are you and she's like I'm on the train. Where are you and I'm like What are you doing on the freaking train? And she's like, well, I came back and I didn't see you so I Jumped on the train. I thought you're on the train. You're on the train to Barcelona and she's like Dubba thing and I'm like, oh god, what do we do now? She's halfway to the train best learner and I'm like, well, when can you get off and come back? Because you know you got passport money everything. It's getting dark here It's like it you know three in the afternoon by now, but I'm still paranoid about the night and she's like Oh, well according to the conductor person It's like another freaking four hours before I can get off at the next stop and then change over and hopefully come back And I'm like Jesus Christ woman. You've got my number I'll just keep this phone charge call me when you get close or back and she's like, yeah I've got a handphone of I paid some dude like, you know, it's 30 freakin euros or whatever They just use his phone for like this tiny little bit of time like okay. Okay. I'm just stressed at this point And she then she hangs up and I'm like Okay, it's all good. I've got this sorted. I'll just charge my phone that things outside the shop So they're not gonna like drag it in or anything. It's all good. I'll just sit here I'll wait it out. She'll be back soon and then it hits me. I need to go to the toilet. Yes And you're the worst thing about freakin France and all of Europe is now for you guys who are from Europe This is probably normal, but for us Australians, it's not you guys pay for your freakin public toilets We don't it's just a public tour. So I'm like, la la la walking down the public tour thing La la la. I'll just go to oh, no, that's right. You pay here. I haven't got any money. I'm checking my pockets I'm looking everywhere and I'm like, oh god. I really need to go I think God is only a pee, but I'm like, oh god, please and I get to the toilet. I'm like, hi Look, I'm just a foreigner. I just need to use the toilet the guy's staying at the door like there's this guard there. He's like not Money and a little mate. This this shit ain't free. There's capitalism and I'm like, oh god So then I end up standing outside of this place mind you the whole time I've got these two giant bags 50 kilos worth standing at the front of this toilet going and make over buck Yeah, mate mate. You got a buck. Well, fuck you mate. No, I didn't actually do that Sorry, I'm just like a mate kind of a buck and no one would give me money I'm like, no, I've got to get inventive about this stuff. I'll get you. Yeah, I'll get a good creative So I put on my thinking hat and I start walking down the train station. I'm thinking, you know what? There's gonna be hotels around here. They're gonna have toilets So I walk down the road and I look for the first hotel a spot just happens to be a five-star hotel And I walk inside like pretending I'm scoping the place, you know looking for a room people gone up and may help you With your bags. No, no, it's fine. My friend is fine. It's all good. I've got this sorted Anyway, he walks away and I'm like, what the frickin hell is a toilet and I look around the corner and I see this toilet down the end I'm like, haha, and I run down there and I'm dragging my giant bags as well behind me and of course Keycard locked and I'm sitting a guy. Oh So I'm like, that's all right. Someone has to use this toilet eventually So I'm sitting around the corner hiding behind the bush like this kind of thing go Reading for you to open and eventually someone comes out and I'm like straight pass. I'm like Hop in I just hope it's not security guard if it because if it is I'm gonna get that pee out before he gets me out That room I swear to God even if I leave it all over the tiles, but it was all good. I got it out I was done. I walk out of that room feeling like a new man go Yeah, how's the best ever? Anyway, so yeah, I'm now sitting here going now. What do I do? Okay, well, I guess I'll just go sit at the train station like a bum So I go back to the train station and in these bags the whole time like I said I've got no money. I've got no passport. I got nothing all I've got is clothes and lots of them like You know winter clothes types of things So I'm like maybe if I just wrap myself up in some clothes and sit here because it's not getting cold It's probably about seven at night There's a lot of people at the train station. So it's I'm not like an obvious bum or anything So I start wrapping myself up and sitting on a like this little bench And there's the French police have walking by and these guys like packing man like the French police They've got some massive weaponry. Anyway, they're walking by looking at me like what are you doing? And I'm like Just waiting for my train, you know, it's all good. Anyway, so they're walking away. They're leaving me alone It's now like 10 at night and I'm like, oh my god I'm gonna have to sleep here and and my phone's getting back down low on battery again. It's down to 20% I'm like Jesus Christ. What is the freaking battery power on an iPhone? This is the worst phone in the world Thank God, it's a work phone. Anyway, so I'm sitting here going stressing again Okay, I'm gonna run out of power either. I'm gonna go exercise. Well, at least it'll keep me warm Or I got to try and find some accommodation for the night. So I'm like, well, I've got that Esperanto book You know, like the the passports or server I nicked it. Well, I'm not nicked. It was that's a lie It was given to me by the nice Swiss couple I met And in it's got all the names, but it's like five years old So I don't know if I'm gonna just call some random person who's like, oh, sorry The person you're calling right now, they passed away like three years ago. Don't be a jackass. So I'm like thinking What do I do? What do I do? And then 11 o'clock night rocks about finally gonna have a phone call and she's like I'm like, oh God, what you done now? And she's like, I'm at the platform It turns out she was at a different platform, but she was back in Paris. Thank God So I finally gonna meet our own furious. I'm like, well, I'm gonna rip this girl You are gonna tear the pieces are type of stuff You know get my big dog face on her and I see and she's like And then runs up to me and I'm like, oh heart melted give her a cuddle type of thing and Yeah, we're back together But now it's almost 12 o'clock night and we have to find a hotel So we spend the next hour going from one hotel to the next to the next looking for a friggin room because there's a billion hotels But no goddamn rooms. We finally get a room at a slightly higher price than normal But then managed to crash probably about one in the morning and at that point my missus is like I'm sorry, but it's your fault. And I'm like, what has it's my fault? And she's like You you didn't make yourself obvious to me when I came to the train. I'm like Whatever, I'm just passing out now. Okay clunk. Anyway, so that's my story for today. Well, this one lasted a while Sorry about that guys So, yeah, that's my story if you enjoyed it share it around share the share of it Make my missus feel bad about ditching me in Paris at least she didn't actually ditch me and just get on the flight back to friggin Australia and So, yeah, share it around like it Tell me if you want to hear more and I'll find some more stories for you because I got billions of them and most of them involve My wife, so it was great having you here. I hope to see you in the next video. And if I don't You will regret it