 The Craft Foods Company presents The Great Gilder Sleeve. It's The Great Gilder Sleeve starring Harold Perry, brought to you by The Craft Foods Company, makers of a complete line of famous quality food products. Now let's get on to Somerfield in the Gilder Sleeve house. It's a balmy spring evening and it seems to be whispering something to Gilder Sleeve. On the surface, he appears to be toying with his after-dinner coffee, but underneath. My George, I think I might circulate a little this evening. Yes, sir. It's time to get back into action. When do I just call up? What'd you say? Just talking to myself, Marjorie. Thinking of going out this evening. Why don't you call up Mrs. Ransom? Well, as always, Mrs. Ransom. You haven't seen her in quite a while. It's been a week or ten days. I feel like calling someone else, though. Let's see. Eve Goodwin, maybe. Haven't seen her in months. I might just give her a jingle. Friday night, she has teachers meeting. Oh. Well, who else do I know? Mrs. Ransom. Besides her. I give up. Who do you know? Nobody, I guess. Well, I'll give Lila a break. What the heck? You better call her. Call Lila? No, Lila's always available. That's one good thing about Lila. She's always handy, and she's always home. I'll just back the car out and take her to the movies. Lila, I'll buy seats in the Lodge and hold her hand. There's the light and the power. Well, no use being fancy about this. There she comes to the window. It's me. Put on your hat. We're going to the movies. What? Nuts. Looks like I'll have to be fancy after all. Oh, well. Who does she think she's pushing around? Playing hard to get at her age. I was only knocking. Come on, let's go to the movies. No, thank you. And for your further information, I am not particularly flattered by the style of your invitation, blowing your horn. Yeah, but Lila, I was just trying to save time. Come on, or we'll miss the newsreel. I'm not going with you, Trotmar. Oh, tell me you got a date. I'm afraid you've been taking me a little too much for granted. Me? I don't know how you could get an idea like that. I've been busy, of course. So have I. Huh? I've been busy too, Trotmar. Well, that's fine. Glad to hear it. But look, we don't have to be technical, Lila. We understand each other, and if you're not doing anything... I'm not, especially with you. Lila, let's talk this over. I don't want to sleep. A gentleman does not stick his foot in a lady's door. But we're old friends. Just let me come in for a minute. Of course it won't mean anything. Guys, just because I stay away a while and hurt your feelings, that's no reason... My feelings are not the questions, Trotmar. It happens I have a new interest. Should I, Mark? Thanks. What do you mean, a new interest? His name is Mark Wayes. He's a newspaper man. You don't want to have anything to do with a newspaper man, Lila? He probably drinks. Sure not. He's always been a perfect gentleman. That way, I mean. What do you mean? Well, I mean, in some ways, he's simply outrageous. I've never in my whole life had a man treat me the way he treats me, Trotmar. You know the first thing he told me. He said I had a funny nose. I don't think you have. Your nose is okay. As a matter of fact, I have a very cute nose. Oh, sure. Sure, your nose is swell. That's not the point. Somehow, Mark just says things to me no one else could say. That's all. Sounds fresh to me. Oh, he is. Like the way I met him. I was taking a little news item down to the indicator office. I always talked to Miss Clement, the society editor. And she introduced me to Mr. Wade. We talked down a minute, and then he said, Mr. Ryan Sim, I'm going to a fire. How'd you like to come along? Can you imagine? A fire is no place to take a girl. Well, of course I declined. But the next night, he phoned and asked me to dinner. He said he'd forgotten my nose, and he wanted to check it. Well, I suppose he took you to some cheap newspaper dive. I tried not to notice, but the dinner cost four dollars. And he left a 50-cent tip. Oh, well. Just trying to make an impression. Oh, Mark, Mark, he doesn't care what people think. It was an Italian restaurant. The doll in his little place. Oh, and Mark was so funny. He pretended to talk Italian to the waiter. Almost drove the poor man crazy. Doesn't sound very funny to me. Well, you have to hear him do it. We went to the movies afterwards, and he offered to wrestle me to see who paid for the tickets. What? It was only joking, of course. This guy has nothing but a show-off, Leela. Well, naturally, I wouldn't expect you to appreciate him, Throckmorton. He has such imagination. Everything he does is so unexpected. He calls me stinky. I never realized a Yankee could be charming before. I don't want to hear any more about this, fellow Leela. Can't we go to the movies? Oh, we had more fun last night. I didn't get home until four o'clock in the morning. Mark's car broke down. He's so cute. What's cute about having a bum car? I suppose you had to walk home. I should say not. He hired a milk wagon. What? A milk wagon was coming along and Mark talked to the man into taking us home. Did you ever hear anything so crazy? Leela, if you ask me, you're the one that's crazy. Are you serious about this cheap comedian? He's not a cheap comedian. Down underneath, he's a very fine person. You can't be serious about a newspaper man. Well, I don't know whether I am or not. I decided we shouldn't see each other for a week as a test. Oh, my goodness. It's been three days now, but Mark doesn't play fair. He sends me some kind of a present every day to keep his memory green, he says. This morning, he sent me a phonograph record. He's crazy about music with the craziest note. Something about, I hope this tender lyric will convey the passion seeping in my soul. But look at the record. This is Smith Mixer. Never heard of it. Oh, you. You're behind the time, Strock Martin. Well, anybody can send a girl a record. Can this fellow sing? No, at least I haven't heard him. Don't worry. If a fellow like that could sing, you'd know it. Would you like me to sing for you, Leela? Oh, come on. Mine is my heart alone. Much for that song. Well, some other song, then, huh, Leela? One of your favorites. Speak to me of love and... I just don't feel like playing, Strock Martin. Oh, come on, one song for old times' sake. Come on, Leela. Well, don't push me. Good. I know a nice song. I don't think I've ever sung it here, but it's nice. What is it? When day is done. Do you know it? That's the right key, too. We can serve food so that we can help hungry people in other parts of the world. So, homemakers, hold on to the leftovers. One of the cleverest ways to serve leftover vegetables or meat or seafood is in a rich, golden cheese sauce. Made the easy way with velveta. This cheese food with a rich yet mild cheddar flavor always melts smooth. Add such goodness and fine food values. As a matter of fact, when you glamorize leftovers with velveta sauce, you're adding high quality, complete protein, precious milk minerals, food energy, riboflavin and vitamin A. To make that rich, tasting, nutritious cheese sauce, just melt one half pound of velveta in the top of your double boiler. Then, gradually stir in one fourth cup of milk. Like magic, you have satin smooth cheese sauce, perfectly delicious on vegetables, eggs, fish, leftover ham, chicken, veal or what have you. Tomorrow, look for velveta at your food store. The name on the package tells you that you're getting the smooth-melting cheese food of craft quality. Faith, it seems, has pulled a knife on Gilder's sleeve. All winter, he lay dormant. Too comfortable and too lazy to exert himself much socially. Now comes spring, and once again, the sap is stirring. He steps next door to pay his respects to his charming neighbor and finds that a stranger has stepped in ahead of him. That kind of thing can shake a man. It has shaken Gilder's sleeve. He comes home from his evening with Leela in a daze and wanders disconsolently off to bed, but not to sleep. Instead, he lies there tense and staring in the dark. Nuts. I'll try my stomach. I just won't think about it. How could you do this to me? I haven't been around much lately, but gee whiz. I thought we had an understanding, sort of. I mean, gosh, after all, we've been to each other, almost. Why, we were even engaged once. Have you forgotten that? Does that mean nothing to you? Newspaper man. I think I might at least have been notified. Might at least have been given first refusal. You're not listening to me. You don't care, that's why. You don't care what happens to me. You know what you are. You're hard-hearted. I don't like to say it, Leela, but you are. All you ever think about is yourself. Why don't you think about me for once? Oh, I don't think you're such a wonderful piano player, either. That's telling. Why didn't I say those things to her when I was over there? Why, I didn't think of men. I can't sleep. You know, you're just lying here like this. Maybe if I read for a while, I might go down in the kitchen and look for a bite to eat. Might as well be eating, just lying awake. Yes, it's me. Go back to sleep, my dear, sorry if I disturbed you. What are you doing up? Are you all right? Oh, yes, yes, go back to bed. But what are you doing wandering around in the middle of the night? I couldn't sleep, that's all. Lucky, what's wrong? Nothing. Marjorie, as long as you're up, tell me something. And I want an honest answer. What is it? Do I seem old to you? How old are the news? Why? Go back to bed. Hello, Phoebe. What can I do for you this fine day morning? Lovely day, isn't it? I remarked to Mrs. Phoebe as I was leaving this morning. Well, what's happening, Mr. Jones? You look a little under the weather. No, I had a bad night last night. No sleep? Too bad. Something keep you awake? I guess so. Well, that kind of thing can tell on a man pretty quickly. Yes, I know. Under the eyes, particularly. Let's not dwell on it, shall we? Phoebe, have you got any kind of a tonic or anything? No, it's the only thing you'll come to the right place. That's why I came. Yes, I'm happy to say the tonics are coming through very nicely now. Not in great quantities, you understand. But enough to tone up our mood. Not in great quantities, you understand. But enough to tone up our regular customers, too. Well, that's good. During the war, you know, we weren't able to get a lot of them. I understand some of the materials were going into the atomic bomb. Oh. Well, I don't want anything like that. Just something to give me a little lift, Phoebe. I don't want to go up like a rocket. Mr. Gervis, may I suspect your joking business? Well, let me see. They have your standard remedies here. Moonage, cycle phosphate. Dodge, dragon patterns. Dr. Pagan, nature compound. Dr. Pagan, nature compound. Bill Bows, beef iron and wine. Bill Bows, beef iron and wine. Flood and liver extract. Flood and liver extract. Goodwin's household ammonia. Goodwin's household ammonia. Well, how did that get up there? How did that get up there? Long shelf! What would you say was the best, Pee-Vee? Which is the best? Yes. Well, they're all excellent, Mr. Gildersley, which, uh, matter of taste. Don't be silly. Nobody ever took a tonic for the taste, Pee-Vee. Which is the best? Well, I tell you, they're all excellent. How about that one there in the brown tissue paper wrapper? Oh, I've heard that's excellent. Excellent. Oh? What about that nasty-looking green one there? That? Excellent. You know what I think, Pee-Vee? I don't think you have any faith in any of them. I don't know. I wouldn't say that. Well, these are all nationally advertised brands. I'm told they do an excellent job. They do, eh? When properly administered? When properly under the guidance of a physician. Oh, I see. Of course I have one here, not quite so well known. Uh, this one only came in yesterday. It's just in the least by the Army. Oh? By the Army? Army surplus. I'm told it cost the Army eight dollars a bottle. We're disposing of it for thirty-nine cents. Is it any good? You know the Army meant to go to sleep. They demand the best. What's in it? Everything. Will it help me to sleep? It won't keep you away. All right, wrap it up. Well, here, gentlemen. Good morning, John. Gentlemen, gentlemen. Hello, Judge. I killed the old man. I know, I know. I had a bad night. Under the eyes there. Oh, yes. Yes, I know. Phoebe's giving me something for it. Why so pale and wand-found lover? Who told you? Tell me what? You've been talking to Lila. I haven't seen Lila in four or five days. What's she got to do with it anyway? Nothing. Lila keeping you awake nights, has she? None of your business? Oh, shut up. I thought you'd sort of lost interest in Lila, Gilda. So did I, confounded. After all, you could have married her there once. I could again, if I wanted to. Well, now I don't know. You're not getting any younger, you know. Neither is she. Certainly. But does she know it? Why, you old goat? Sure, I'm an old goat. So is Phoebe, but we admitted, don't we, Phoebe? Ah, wouldn't say that. Another day, I might admit it, Judge, but this spring weather, I've got a half of mine to close up early. You do that, Phoebe. Take the rest of the day off. But, Mr. Gildersleeve, what about your tonic? Don't you... Give it to the judge, Phoebe. I know something quicker. All right, Commissioner, your next plan right up in the chair there. Sorry to keep you waiting. That's all right, Floyd. Oh, thanks, Doc. Thanks a lot. See you around, regardless of the wife. Take care now. Cheap skate. Only guy in town that hasn't raised his tip since the war started. Well, how's it going, Commissioner? Been doing any... Commissioner, what happened? I had a bad night, Floyd. I'd rather not hear any more about it. Put them things under your eyes. Well, don't tell me about them. Do something about them. Okay, I'll try. I want you to give me the works, Floyd. I want you to make me look ten years younger. Well, that's quite an order, Commissioner. I ain't no miracle workie, you know. I ain't no Elizabeth Arden. All I claim to be is a darn good barber and a fair tenor. But I'll do what I can. Is that too tight for you? No, that's okay. I guess we better start with a massage, huh? Unless you want to go in for surgery. For what? Only joking, Commissioner. My surgery's unintentional, you might say. What do you think about my mustache, Floyd? Do you think that's a little droopy? No, why? Somebody been making cracks? No, I just wondered if it couldn't be a little more youthful. Well, we could heist it a little, maybe. You got a date or something, Commissioner? I just worried about holding out of your job. Well, I have a sort of a date. Sort of a date? What kind of a date is that? Well, this party, I won't mention her name, but she's gone and got some notions all of a sudden about youth. Oh. Afraid I'm going to have to do some missionary work there. Mrs. Ransom running around with some younger fellow, is she? Where did you get that idea? Well, what else? You come in here and want your mustache heisted. There must be something behind it. It ain't so long it's getting in the soup. What makes you think it's Mrs. Ransom? Well, ain't it? This fellow's got the darndest line, Floyd. He insults her. Tells her she's funny looking and she loves it. Sure. It's them little attentions that get some. I swear, I think this guy is crazy. He took her for a ride in the milk wagon. Can you imagine that? I've seen a fellow do that in the movie once. Maybe he did, too. Only in the movies they usually bring the horse home to breakfast. But, Floyd, what way is that to behave with a lady? It's not so dumb. Women don't want a man who's faithful. They just want a man to be cute. Well, maybe. How do you think I and the wife have stuck it out all these years? I just let things go along and when I see they gone as far as they can and she's about ready to crown me, I'll pull something. He's cute, honor. You can't hit a guy when he's cute. I don't know, Floyd. It would just never occur to me to take Mrs. Ransom out in the milk wagon. Oh, you don't want to take her out in the milk wagon anyway. That's been done already. Be original. If you want to make a hit with her, take her out in something worse. What's worse than a milk wagon? I don't know. There must be something. How about a hearse? A hearse? Sure, that'd kill her. You know Fred Cyple? He's got a hearse. Is Cyple the undertaker? Who else? Fred's a good kid and he likes a joke too. You know, he don't let on when he's on a job, but he can laugh with the best of them. He'd lend you his hearse. Or rent it anyway. Oh, Floyd, I don't know, a hearse. What can you lose? You're not doing as hot as it is. Well, that's true, Floyd, but still. I ain't hot and never want any fair ladies, you know. How do I know she'd like it? Well, you already know she goes for that kind of stuff. I look, Commissioner, get the picture. She hears a horn blowing out front. She runs to the front door. She opens it. And there's you and a top hat sitting in a hearse. How could she resist you? Floyd, do you expect me to be... Well, do you think maybe you'll be seeing Cyple in the next... Sure, obviously, and Fred. I'll see him today, probably. Be glad to take it up with him. Now, relax. Let me get on with this massage. Commissioner, relax, Floyd. You don't think maybe she'd feel squeamish? Why should she? You don't have to make a ride in back. Well, thanks a lot, Mr. Cyple. I'm certainly much obliged. It's a nice little job you got here. I'll be careful with it. You've driven pierce arrows before, have you? Oh, yes, yes. That is, they drive just like any other car, don't they? I guess so. I just keep her under 35, that's all. I have new rings installed, and they're not worked in yet. Oh, I will. Yes, indeed. Has a horn, has it? Right there. Fine horn. I don't have much call for it, actually. Well, good luck, Mr. Gillis, for you. Thanks again, Mr. Cyple. Hope I can do as much for you sometime. All clear there? All clear. There we go. Just wait until she sees me in this. Would she think I'm crazy? Where is she? Everybody will think I'm crazy if I have to keep this up. But Leela, I guess she didn't notice. Let's try again. Now what? All dressed up and no place to go. A smart lady I know has reduced all this nutrition business to its simplest terms. She says there are two kinds of foods, filler-uppers and builder-uppers. Of course, right now, many homemakers are having to use more of the filler-upper foods than they ordinarily would. But it's important that every meal includes some of the builder foods. Important that we remember which ones they are. Definitely in the builder-upper class is Kraft's famous cheese food, Valvita. For Valvita helps supply muscle-building protein, milk minerals to help maintain strong bones and teeth, food energy for working power, vitamin A and riboflavin. Remember all this when you see Valvita at the food store. When you buy, get genuine Valvita, the nutritious cheese food of Kraft quality. The Great Gilder Sleeve is played by Harold Perry. It is written by John Whedon and Sam Moore. The music is by Jack Meakin. This is John Lang speaking for the Kraft Foods Company and inviting you to listen in again next week for the further adventures of The Great Gilder Sleeve. Good night. If your family has been passing up fresh green salads, try serving them this appetizing new way. For a surprise touch of flavor, zip up your salad dressing with some tangy, golden Kraft salad mustard. Then watch them go for those fresh nourishing vegetables. And here's another suggestion. In serving hot, cooked vegetables, blend Kraft salad mustard into your favorite cream sauce for a zesty extra touch of flavor. And remember, there's another craft. Mustard with snappy horseladish added for sharper taste. Buy both of these delicious Kraft Mustards when you shop tomorrow.