 Tell me something that you know you can't be wrong about or a motivation that you have or something like that Is there anything like that for you? You have like a principal? Well, I mean so by the way, I'm Adam Nice to meet you. My name is Adam I'm trying to think you know to think about it like we know each other Yeah, there's a couple of I mean Like if you look if you look at like a phrase or something that a mantra that I that I kind of ascribe to a lot Okay, if you're not embarrassed by the person you were a year ago, you're not making progress. Oh I love that if you're not embarrassed about the person you were a year ago If you're not embarrassed Or you're dead, right, right? Yeah, exactly Man that would have been like thesis right there and gotcha I got you know see like I said it's not about that So like if you're not embarrassed, well if we talk about that for a little bit and not at all five minutes Sure, cool. So if you're not embarrassed about the person you were a year ago, you're not making progress Yeah, what does what does that mean or what does that mean to you? Well, so I heard it at a Sunday assembly conference a couple of years ago And I don't know who the quote is described you but I'd never forgot it And I think that you know when you look at the progression of life and at least my own personal experience It's like, you know, I want to always try to see that I'm moving in some sort of direction that you know It moves me further along whatever path of river. I'm floating down And I think along with that comes, you know, the idea that okay I should probably be making changes that you know move myself towards that all the time Oh, that's an interesting interpretation. Yeah, I could be like reflective back and say all right, you know Boy, I would not have made the same decisions now that I did a year ago Or made it made that choice of how to say that or that direction that I went It's gotten me to this point. But again, that's progress So why be embarrassed if it got you to the point that you are now We can look back at it with some wisdom and be like, oh, I shouldn't have done that Right. So I think embarrassed is it embarrassed is one of those words that I think probably elicits a little bit of an emotional Reaction to it. Uh-huh, you know, I think about it from a standpoint of okay Well, if I'm you know, if I'm if I'm saying something out of context or something that all together was Inappropriate at that time or not the best use of it. I can look back on them. We like, you know, I can Embarrass I can take myself, you know, shame on you Adam for that for feeling that way Is it but I wouldn't do that anymore. You're giving yourself permission to laugh or be humble by your own actions Yeah, I think that that's a fair way to say that more. Yeah, the way how I was interpreting that when you had first said it is like I have permission to make mistakes Yeah, because I'm always giving myself the time in the future to correct those mistakes So if I make them now, it's not the end of the world because it'll always be another year That's a good healthy outlook. I think it's I think it's also, you know, I mean if again if we're you know We're all somewhat reflective on our, you know, our own past and again to me It's like, you know, it's hard to measure life in a series of days or hours or months or sure Yeah, you know, if I look at the grand arc of, you know, my existence here I can probably pretty effectively look at a year's worth of time and just think okay, you know, who was that individual, you know May 3rd 2018 I've never considered my identity and such a Such a short resolution so that I feel like a different person a year ago. Does that make sense? Sure. Yeah, like I would need to have my my life is in blocks It's like we're not yeah, and I tend to organize a lot in that way and again I don't think we were talking about you know completely, you know, like share level transformation. Oh, yeah, sure But it has happened. Oh sure. Oh, yeah, definitely no doubt and I've definitely done things where it's like Why did I pretend to know Korean? In fourth grade, right? Like why was it trying to sound cool? I'll never make that That's not true. I'm like, oh, well, I guess everyone knows I'm a liar now like exactly things like that happen, right? So like I'm totally fine with that though. I wondered How do you make progress out of just being embarrassed of it? Like what's the corrective action that you need to do? Like is it just enough to be embarrassed to make progress or I don't know that you're in that moment you're necessarily like, you know as you're living in the present I don't know that in that moment you you have the introspection to look and see oh, I would have made that decision differently immediately I think you need the time of reflection and looking back and okay And then the renewed sense of like where I am to be able to to look back and say wow, I've I've moved I've grown I've what I continue to keep making that same mistake again Yeah, absolutely. If not, let me make a plan to go around. Let me grow. Yeah, let me grow out of it I mean just this the awareness of it itself I mean actually helps me. I'm not I'm not thinking about it at all all the time But I do when I do think about like what people ask me about is something that you can principle wise kind of Get behind I love that concept. I love that self-reflection aspect. I wonder Is there a way that that could be applied to like a group setting rather than just saying like hey rather me improving myself What can we do to improve? How can I express that because I'm looking back on what we did a year from now and I'm Sigh embarrassed by other people's actions. How do you express that? So I think like the perfect example would be something like sunday assembly at that point where okay We're we as an organization. We're a volunteer run group. We have a different Uh, I guess flavor to this repeatable template that we've had for the past five years And weird there's no real roadmap there. So each and every month is a grand new experiment right to do Clashing of ideas seeing what's close to the top Absolutely, and sometimes you make mistakes, but it's okay. Yeah, and then that can be something like okay Did we go a particular way either towards a particular topic or a particular? You know song selection or a particular approach to was gangsters paradise the really great song play after that Yeah I tell you an example of that once we're almost out of time. Oh, yeah, uh, if you want to talk more that's totally fine But I just have this as a sign. I'm not wasting your time. We had uh, we had a challenge several months ago Probably about a year or so ago where a song was selected which some people in the groups thought was relatively culturally inappropriate It was great enough area that it caused a lot of Interesting interesting. Yes That is its own big topic. Would you mind ask me? Would you mind telling me what the name of the song was? No, it was uh, yeah, uh, uh, I can I can you tell you, um I will tell you the story in a second. Okay, go for it. Go for it. Go for it. Um, so we had we had We thought it would be a good idea to like get the people in the room together and have a conversation and a dialogue about You know why people feel this way and such Uh-huh. Just cool everything down. Yeah, and basically let's let's learn from this and at that meeting Somebody who was there Actually called me out for a song that we had done Maybe a year or two prior Um, it was basket case by green day. Okay, because what's in the lyrics that's offensive. Well, essentially it's you know A song about mental illness, you know, and you know, somebody's going crazy or you know and that type of thing And you know, it's a fun green day song. Yeah. Yeah, I really didn't think about it. It's I don't trust me I've been in the same position too. I've sang Semi charm life. Yeah at at work. Yeah, just you know headphones in doing work and I had someone pull me over I'm like you shouldn't sing that song. I'm like It's like, do you know the lyrics in that song? I'm like, yeah, but I never really thought about it No, right, and then I read the lyrics and I'm like, yeah, but Were you reading that as like a novel or were you reading that as like the song that I was singing It's just like it's a great song But yeah, like how do you What's the bright? How do you handle that? Should I feel embarrassed about that? Is that I guess my my realization was in that moment that okay I have to take seriously what what it is. I'm I'm I'm I'm choosing to To sing or bringing to the table. It doesn't mean that it's not just what you like It's what everybody likes if you're right and I have to I have to be as as inclusive in my thought process As I can yeah, you know in order to make that you know to make the best decisions possible And sometimes I need somebody who had that memory of two years ago And you know where you know of that moment and how that affected them and it's like, okay I'm not going to make that same mistake. I don't think again or at least I'm going to enter Those types of situations with a different kind of focus. I'll ask ahead of time If it's cool before I sing this song or I'll make additional dialogue about it. Yeah Yeah, we just need to make the effort to have communication in this case the the one that actually sparked the challenge there was a particular song that was Long story short it was in the it was in the style of an old negro spiritual Some of the words were You know changed ever so slightly to kind of make it a more modern Sunday assembly is instead of talking about being free. They're talking about getting ad support Facebook or something like that not that extreme but you one day at lack of clone Something like that. This is like, I mean, I'm a little I feel a little awkward. Yeah, it was like that Yeah, so so we we had those challenges. We we went back and forth like does a sound, you know, um You know represent a culture that do words. These are really really big questions Yes, now at the end of it what we found out that the song was actually a modern song written by a white woman It was uh, uh, like it was not at all an old african-american spiritual Sure, let that have mattered either way. It could have, you know figured that out It still drove a very important. I think healthy conversation that sure affects what we do today But I mean even still I don't know that they would have, you know, raised as much issue as they could have if they You know had said All right, I mean, I don't know if it would have been a big enough deal or even people would have noticed if they wouldn't have Looked and see deeper to sign find out where the sorts of the song actually came from I'm gonna throw something out here and this might be a little controversial. If you don't want to record just let me know Are we recording now? We're recording now. Yeah Was any of the people who are upset like me black? No, it tends to be the case That the people who get upset about things like that are people like you had borrowing from black culture Are not black people who make that complaint, right? It tends to be non-black people that make that complaint an example that I had for that was Um, there was there's a guy who's named mac miller. He just died his rapper. Yeah, it's very very good Incredible he infuses funk into a lot of his stuff and he plays a bunch of instruments But a lot of people were upset about his style of rap because it's like oh, he's borrowing from black people He's borrowing from gangster. He's borrowing from trap. He's most like dude. It's all Like it's all open But the people who are really complaining were like white people who are taking position of i'm not racist So i'm going to be at arguing for these guys over here Meanwhile, these guys over here will look like me or like, uh, we hear us for this I'm listening mark miller right mac miller right now. What are you talking about? so I wonder like in the effort to not fall into bad stereotypes culturally A lot of people inadvertently reinforce bad stereotypes in the sense of like hey, you can't play that only black people So let me ask you a question. Yeah, um, so if in that situation if it was just a stylistic or a You know a you know a musical kind of choice. Yeah, that's I mean that if that I tend to agree with you I don't think that that's something that um You know fits the definition of what we're talking about here for me as the context Yes, but let me ask you this talk to me like if this was an actual like You know negro spiritual that had been co-opted for this purpose. Would that have changed your opinion on it at all? I mean not really like if it's if the if the if I came to the sunday assembly and you guys saying a negro Spiritual about science and now science is great. Like I'm looking around at everyone Everyone's enjoying a type of music that like my ancestry Brought forward and we're putting it into something that I think is supportive for the culture science Everything's cool. Like if you started up a negro spiritual about how we need to start Sitting more black young black man in jail for nonviolent crimes. I mean like this is really offensive Like not only did you co-opt the thing that I had but you're using it for a bad reason No, it's for me. It's about what's the context That in context is love and I feel like a lot of people forget that and they just got cut up on that surface Surface level thing. So a negro spiritual that wouldn't bother me at all. No So the challenge that I have in that situation is to like and again, I don't want to overstate, you know, what What any of this is no, it's like, you know, it's that your opinion matters A tremendous amount the opinions that of the other individuals matter and the unknown opinions of the mass The the 80 or so people that are going to be sitting down different I don't know. I mean, but there's a certain gravity to that at least to say, okay, well, I don't want to I want to I want I want us to learn and to grow from and through that And all of it flavors kind of how the perspective, you know, will look moving forward the this dialogue You know the conversations that have happened since sure that we address things online Topics like this and how we discuss them. I mean, that's those are all good moving the ball type things forward And we're not gonna we're gonna miss it sometimes too. And I don't have an issue with being embarrassed I would always love to see all of my emotions be informed. What do you think about that? So like even if I'm embarrassed embarrassed or if I was ignorant like why was I ignorant about this? Why was I embarrassed about this? Is there a reason for that and Was I embarrassed for the right reasons or was I just embarrassed? I need to make a change Maybe I was embarrassed, but I was actually right. Maybe I should have took some time to explain that So that would be an interesting way to think about it too. Like, okay, the fact that you know At the time it did seem like I was making, you know a decision And even now I can look back on it, but it worked out, you know I mean it was the right thing to do at that time I don't think that that's a that's a challenge because I think that those I mean everything's Everything snowballs into where we're at today. So those embarrassing situations outcomes good or bad They're gonna form who we are today And sure yeah, that is is that you know, we can look back and say, all right Well, I I don't know that I would have handled that situation the same way now I don't know that I see the world the same way that I did before And I've just always really liked that comment, but I understand embarrassed is a is a tough word Can I throw one last question? Yes Is it possible to have a perfect year where you just don't do anything that's particularly embarrassing? And you're like I still want to progress I or yeah, I'm good now. Like you don't need to be embarrassed to be To progress, right? So, I mean, I think you could yeah, I mean, it's just it's just your outlook I mean somebody can just continue to do day in and day out what they do go to work, you know My family yeah, absolutely just grind right like I'm doing it. Absolutely. I have a bigger plan But that's not necessarily progress. Why not? So that well, I mean it's it's living it's existing for me That's not necessarily progress and even if it was or development Even if it was I could probably still point back to any point in time in the past and say, all right This helped change my something I watched something I saw something I did still helped change my perception on things My approach towards people So I think even in the most mundane Existence if I just decided to like you said punch a clock go in and work and all that type of stuff There's still growth and and things that happen out of everyday situation But there's no what I'm calling and I know I'm maybe dwelling on the word But there's no like acknowledgement of oh, I made a mistake. I feel bad about it. Let me correct that like it's all like Hey, no every day I woke up. I'm helping people. I'm having great conversations. I'm volunteering I got my life in order. I'm not on any drugs. I got off alcohol or whatever whatever the issues is But I am living healthy. I'm giving back to community and I feel like I'm actually a great person right now A gear goes round and I have nothing but I have no regrets Isn't there's that mean I stopped progressing? No, but if I but if no not at all I mean and I think embarrassment, you know, again, it's one of those words. It's a it's a hot topic word But like, you know, if I if I'm like everything is going great And you know, would I if I if I look back? Yeah, and of course, yes, would you change? Yeah, would I have done things differently? Would I have you know, would I have made a different decision now? And that's I think partially what what appeals to me in this regard is, you know, the The application towards leadership, you know, more so than anything else. It's like, okay. Hello Oh my god, I got it. I introduced myself to you earlier. I'm chris. I'm tight It's really nice. It's pleasure to meet you. You played great today, buddy. You play really great We'll be in touch. We'll see you later. I'm here for sure Um, so I think it applies. I think the the application to leadership I mean, do you think about again someday? Sure. Yeah. Yeah, it's like there's no roadmap for something. You need that reflection. It's absolutely important Seems like the most important thing is you should reflect and if there's mistakes there Yeah, you can feel embarrassed, but don't dwell on it because everybody makes mistakes. Yeah, but you always reflect Absolutely, whether there's embarrassment at there or not and that's the way how you progress I think that's fine. Do you think this statement will stay the same like maybe five years from now? I'm going to continue to use you think you'll improve it ahead of time I don't know. It's not my phrase to why not you've been living by it. Yes, but uh, I mean again I don't want to if it's a famous Yeah, who cares? No, put your name at the end of it. Make it your own thing But I'm wondering if you live through this and you have even more information. Wouldn't you be willing to change it to something? That's probably oh for sure. Yeah, I think so. Cool. I think that's the that's a very good way to put it Nice. All right. I'm great. Yeah, cool. Thank you. All right. That was fun