 We have the girl stalk segment, I'll be standing in for Valentine, she's a little bit under the weather so you can help us also send a messages of get well soon messages in that order is reversed, but our topic of conversation will be about knotting, so we will be here. Today is dealing with difficult people in life. This is what we have on our Facebook as well. So you can visit that to be part of it, pattern set. I have very able people with me, very able youths from the Dubai for Karibu Nisan. Thank you. Is Oguda qualified to be called a youth? Oguda? Am I to young? It's like you're to old. Right. Oguda is not a youth. It can be. It can not have to a young. I already love this conversation. Maybe you can start with you Madam Sto. Hey everybody. I am still the Sto. I'm back. And Val, we miss you. You better get yourself better. Yes, and that's great. But I just want to say that I feel like to get well soon as well. And back to you, the second guest youth. Ok my name is Oguda Bradley. I'm here to help us in this Building thing. By the end of this show, we teachers have a work plan. China has un probably difficult for some people. But you are there, you are just there, you feel nothing, you are just lying there. But it is very difficult for others to have been left of her and others. It is same when you are stupid. You don't know? You don't know that you are stupid. And it is the same when you are a hater, You don't know that you are a hater. So we are going to be helping these haters. It is only difficult for others. Alright… But at the end of this, you are going to be helping the haters to know where they are, if you are a hater or on this side. So that they know that they are haters, I don't know how they can help themselves. All right, haters are very difficult people. They have certain characteristics, Mr. Oguda. And we meet them in different situations. But I'd like us to start by, what are some of the flags that you see and you just know this person is a difficult person or a hater. Okay, for me, the very minute I leave my house and I'm at the gate and my neighbour is like, kwenu elasmu vengu ya red kilasiku. You know, it's not like I wear red dresses every day. But she's always like, I know this is a difficult person. That is a flag for sure. Somebody who just gets into your space, your personal space like that. What are the characteristics of this? How do you just see the person? You see the room from the look. Some of these looking at you are not even smiling. Looking like they are fault finders. But some people don't like to smile. They are fault finders. They are just looking for mistakes. At the end of this, you start looking for anything good. Like somebody going to an orange tree. But instead of seeing the fruits, he's only seeing the thals. Just the thals. I say, ma'imitini, baya tasi lezi pa. How come it has thals? Yet there are also fruits there and it's not even mentioning this. So are you trying to say, Kaisu, as much as we have difficult people, we humans are also not perfect. We have fruits and we have thals. We have not perfect, we are living in a peaceful world. The author, the founder of sin and badness is taking here with us. So how do you expect? It's like staying in the toilet, there are three, not toilet. The three not there are not expecting flies. Yes, flies must be in the latrin. So that is about the sale and the work. There are mistakes. So if you come here to look for mistakes, you must get them. But if you're that kind of person that capitalizes on the mistakes and the faults, you are going to miss the beautiful things that come with life. I'd like to know... Linda, Storm. Storm is a very aggressive name. Let's say in a neighborhood setting. How do you deal with haters in a neighborhood setting? Are you the kind of person that is going to be aggressive back? Or are you the kind of person that is going to take things lying down? Or are you the kind of person that is going to report them to the third party? How do you handle this situation? Well, you know, I'm the Storm, so I bring Storm everywhere. You bring Storm everywhere? If you're in my business, then there's going to be a problem. But then again, I think I am the Storm that Jesus comes. So sometimes I take things easily. You have a lot of wise words and poetry as well. Out of all these ways that you use to deal with this view, which one is always the most effective? The most effective, it's sad but it's the one where I get to be tough and really loud and shout a lot. This is the one that gets the message? Yes. But it doesn't really work for so long. I'm still at it for a while but Keshopia will still be at the same place. At the same place? Yes. So there's no proven effective way of dealing with Kamati Yarocha? I was a neighbor, a Ugandan lady who was a drunkard. So imagine me planning to come to job, sleeping as early as eight so that I wake up at 4, prepare for work. And then at around one, around midnight one, she's back and back whaling, very drunk and putting the volume up there to over 100. So the whole floor is awake and she's whaling and it's like every day. So she was difficult to us. So we decided to be difficult to her too. The whole floor decided to be difficult to her. I love how she resisted our difficulty. We dealt with her difficulty negatively. And I love how she fought back that because when we were fed up, we told her you are not going to continue this way. So if you do this, you will make sure you leave this place and go to another place. So she didn't listen. By the first day she didn't make noise but the second day she came back to her ill character. She came back around now to 2am and started shouting. So we all woke up, we broke the glass, we all took pills, went to the tap, kachota maji tukimoga na niya, nyomba na niya, like the whole night, na fanya tu yo kazi, ya kutukwa nyomba ya, I love what she told us. My neighbors, I know you want me to go and you do this so that I go. I want to go. I'm here. I want to go. She didn't go until the agent and the landlord themselves refused to take her hand and told her you must go, you're giving us a problem, you must go. So I think it's good to resist. You tell people that... It's good to understand. Yes. There was also another choir director of ours who was elected and people were giving him pressure. People knew he would not perform. So people were giving him pressure to resign. So one day he just stood in front of people and said, I'm not resigning any soon. So you better get used to me. I think that works. That always works. Be strong. Be strong for something. Yes. Tell them, Mati, Luta said, if you don't stand for anything, you don't deserve to live. Yes, you should be living for anything. If there's nothing you are willing to die for, then you are not worth living. Wow. There must be something you are willing to die for. This is that girl's talk segment. We are two men and one lady. But you're going to get it inside. She's the queen now. She's our queen. But remember, we have this topic on Facebook as well. Dealing with difficult people and I see your comments already coming in. So keep them coming. We are going to be sampling them in a few right now. But we have these kind of people who always discourage you. Have you seen these kind of people? Have you met these kind of people? You tell them, we next week want to save Manze by the end of the year, if you haven't, I will say, ah, where were you? Where were you? I want to explain to you after job planning, if you haven't, I will always make. I will say, I will always make. Have you interacted with these kind of people? Okay. I think the best thing about life is to never tell anybody anything. Because the moment you tell somebody, I'm going to be saving up money to buy something. They'll be like, don't save up money. You're only earning 100 bob per day. What are you going to do with 100 bob? Will you save 20 bob? What do you 20 bob do? You're not going to save anything. But if you thought to yourself and said, I'm going to save up 20 bob and I'm not going to tell anybody. No one is discouraging you. So why do you have to tell people about things? For me, I just rather keep quiet and do my stuff. And yeah. The best thing to deal with, the best way to deal with people who like to discourage people is just to stay silent. Not telling them anything. There's no way that you can live in this world without being discouraged. Like even your best friend will discourage you. Don't do it. You're still not ready. Who knows when it's the right time in this world to do anything? So discouragement is like oxygen? Yes. Yes, it's all over the air. Alright. But I've never done anything I've achieved in this life. There's no single thing I've done without before being discouraged. Nothing, including education. I came to university through Arame community. So when I was working through inviting people to come to my fundraising, somebody, a primary teacher, just told me, you can't make it the life of the university education is too tough. You can't make it. And again, you'll need a lot of money. Learning generally is the university of Nairobi, my castle land. Used to pay over 80,000 per semester. That is like a term. Where you going to get that kind of money? So two things, the academics is too tough for you. And finances is too tough for you. So I think you should not do what you can't do. And you know what? I finished... You're doing your masters now? Yes. I finished that first degree without help. That means I manage finances. And I scored the best grades. I got the best grades. You are the top of your class? Yes. So apart from that... How good you are the top of your class? We should have a standing position for the minister. You are the top. You are the top. You are the top of your class. So you got a scholarship to do your masters? Yes. I'm doing my masters of scholarship because they pick the best and give scholarship in anticipation that you will be a lecturer. You qualify to be a lecturer. So they prepare you. But how do they do to the... This is after discouragement? Not even one. Several of them. Some people assured me that they are sure. You are going to fail? I'm going to fail financially. I'm also going to fail academically. Yeah. And here I am. Another one. I've started some businesses. People told me... Okay. There's a time I started a school inside my church at our church compound. And one of the elders told me that we've started... We've tried starting several times and it has failed. So if you fear failure, please just don't start it because it's going to fail. That school has done KCP three times. I started it from preschool. And by then I was also a high school student. So I started it at preschool. Now it is the best academy and people in our area as children as small as two, three years, you can hear them playing in English. You speak English. Keep in the village. I was mobilizing people to help me start this and people now should be helping me. People who have money and people who are... That guy was a teacher, a retired teacher. He was telling me playing on my eyes that people have started and it has not succeeded. Why do you think it's going to succeed? It's not going to succeed, stop it. Or if you are going for it, you're going to start it, alone, we don't want to fail. Go and fail alone. After some time, after some time when it was speaking, when everybody was attractive until even people don't belong to that church, were coming to the committee members to bring their kids, kids were coming even from the other side of the river, other villages, now they came in to to brag that this is our school and they want to take control of everything when they were discouraging me. Lastly, there are some visitors that I started and we were... you buy some space You see why we can't call him a youth? He has done a lot of this. We try developing that. And some of it tells you that this if you don't have itabamonia itabamonia very soon, so please don't try. So you have a different way of dealing with them? Yes, you prove them. Like Linda said, they must be there. So you prove them wrong. So Linda says, don't tell them what you apply. Yes, kaisu says tell them and prove. They discourage me and I prove them wrong. And I have done a plethora of times. So you can pick your way of dealing with the people who like to discourage you. You either don't tell them what you are planning or you tell them and prove them wrong. Yes. I think an element of surprise is always good. An element of surprise is always good. So one day you just wake up and you are driving this wonderful car and people are like oh, so she has a car. Oh, so she is drained to Luminati and all that stuff. So they will be talking about me now. But when they have no idea how I did it because I never got to tell them. But if the youth... Okay, I like the conflicting views but they both work. Because it has worked for you and it has worked for you. All the viewers choose which one they prefer in the past. I like the one. Okay, so then we have this kind of people who will always tell lies about you. Yes. I told you before off camera that there are several people out here who hate you not because you've done anything bad to them but because somebody told them a lie about you and they believed. I call them fools. Those who believe what somebody tells them and they have no experience so they are not from you. So they just carry this burden of hate in their hearts. Imagine you without any evidence. And somebody tells you to miscare and then you go to serve and you do nothing to them. And this also happens with... I'm sorry to say but it happens a lot in school settings with teachers. One teacher tells another teacher that student is a very bad boy or a very bad girl and the other teacher has no experience but maybe you're just bad because of the energy that this other teacher aliproject kuwako then you return bad energy with bad energy. So that's where the problem is. But there are also people that just generally just hate you if they've not heard anything but they... One of the teachers says I hate you, I hate you, I hate you, I hate you. Such people exist. I don't understand that I hate you and they just hate you. You've never had a situation where I hate you. Everybody has. No. I hate you. I just think or to have a reason for hating somebody. It must be in the way they look. It can't just hate somebody. It's rooted somewhere. Or the problem is you not there. The problem could be my ancestors. I don't know. But you see, they now hate me for the reasons I don't know. I like, I like. So... I think that's hate. It sets me. Who was trying to mix your bloods? Who was trying to mix your bloods and they don't like you. And they don't like you. But there are people you should avoid. Somebody told me in a business... That you hate me. Yes. That you hate me. So we should like... And you never know that you hate me because you are just there. I don't know that he or she hates you. I hate you. So by the time you are finding out when you start realizing no wonder he does not talk to me in this type of way. No wonder he is always rude to me. And you are asking, what did they do to this person? But there is a point in KSW's brain that there are people you should just avoid. How do you know these people that you should just avoid? You can know the person who brings people down. If they interact in a situation because he is the only dead here. You know a guy who was in a relationship with somebody. She brought that lady down to zero. Went to another girl. Brought that girl to zero. Number three. And now he is coming to you as number four. And dealing with you when you are dumb, when you are mean. See that person you should avoid. Again in a business situation somebody advised me that if there is a difficult client refer him to the competitor refer to the competitor. You have a shop and then somebody there are people who come to your shop and ask you if there is a problem. You should avoid. You should ask for about 30 minutes if some customer is waiting about 30 minutes and then he says I will go to the shop and ask you to go. I will go to the shop. So do you with that. Can you go to the shop? I will go to the shop. I will go to the shop. That is why I am spicy. That is the best way to deal with it. If there is a girl competing if there is a girl in a gun situation in a storms you can recommend that guy. Alright. Ladies have this challenge more than men. Challenge? Ya. What to ambao. Don't worry. I think it's just natural for women. If another woman looks good very few women would say that they are poor and it's just good from the heart. But you know a girl can be saying that they are poor but then I feel and I feel I can do better that's all women do. Some women, not all women. Don't say hate. Don't say hate. We don't understand. No, we don't understand. We don't have the numbers. We don't understand. Because we have had a lady who is looking good. I thought she would talk to me when something happened. Yes because I have been in a situation where that's how people behave. For men, we are different. They say, how are you? You can go out and copy. And then we will go to the shop. Cuminawa kiweni wadi ngombe kibisa, habia diisak dallongikita na hibu Belishana Akkuuwa. Misha, kwa hibu? Aikata hibu. Analangaka na hibu? Iti diribu. Ya, habia diisak dallongikita na hibu. Ya, kwenia. Hibu renia kwa hibu mwa kadumikita hibu, kwa hibu hibu hibu hibi kama u stoodi No, it's not a main thing No, I'm not saying that you'll be telling me something off about another woman You'll be telling me something off about a man that is your friend Or when your companion like and you'll be like I think Tom is dating wrong people No, that's what you do