 Oh my God, I am so excited for this. I've been waiting forever. I'm Khaleesi Gripes 82. Today I'm going to be reacting to Star Wars Rise of Skywalker! The final trailer. Okay, I'm literally trying not to cry right now. Literally. That Lucas films, that Lucas logo coming up. It just brings so much nostalgia to my eyes. She's training right now. This is fun! The force brought us together. Finn! Yes! I love Finn. I love that he had no story or character at all in Last Jedi. I hope that that continues. He's just a fun character now. Instead of anything more like he could have been as a Stormtrooper turned good person. I love what they did to his character! God, look at these vistas. Cool. Is that Rose Tico? Sorry, haters. Rose is back, bitches. Star! My Rose is back and you're gonna get in trouble. Hey now, my Rose is back. That's an old song. It's an oldie. Subscribe for oldies. I'm young though. I'm super young. Fight if we lead them. Poe Dameron! Chewbacca! Can't do Chewbacca. Oh, that's fun though. Finn is there. Poe is there. Are we finally gonna see them? Well, I mean Poe and then Finn, right? Is black. Subscribe for racist stereotypes. People keep telling me they know me. No one knows Rey. No one. Because she has no character or personality but this movie is going to finally address the hard-hitting questions. Who's Rey? He takes the saber, the sword saber and he's like, whoop, just cash. In the rain, just cash. Puts it down. There's no sweeping movement. This is an episode one. More like episode dumb. What? Oh, people are pretending that the prequels are good now so I should pretend to like those as well even though they were dumpster fires. Kinda like the new franchise. Okay, episode one does some cool stuff too. It's very flash in the pan but this is being more subdued. I love them both. I think they're both great. I think they're both excellent films. I love them. TIE FIGHTER! I'm yelling TIE FIGHTER! That doesn't work at all. Are they on an ice planet? Is this like a planet of ice? Like a literal, literally planet of literally ice? Nuts. That's nuts. Emperor Palpatine! Throne! Holy hell in a hand grenade! This is nuts! There is so much going on. Did that star destroyer just blast through the ice? More like an ice destroyer. Cool beans. Cool beans. You're coming. Wait, hold on. Circle, circle these ships. There's definitely a ship in here from some obscure thing that some nerd online is gonna know about. Like me, there's definitely references to other Star Wars stuff. Like the Clone Wars, like maybe a book series, like maybe the Knights of Old Republic. Something in there is from something else and it will have absolutely no consequence or value to the story at all. But it's there and I need to acknowledge it because I'm a fan! And I know more than you. Circle them all. Together. And there it is. That's what it's all about. The new team, the team that we all love, more than Luke, more than Han, more than Leia, this is the cast that I want to see close out this franchise. I hope Luke doesn't even show his goddamn face. I don't even wanna hear his voice! I love the last Jedi! Oh my God, oh my God! I really don't like seeing Rao fighting or Kyrae or whatever. We call this weird sexual fantasy online. I want to see them loving. I want to see them embracing each other because this is the story. This is what it's all about. This whole 9LG has been leading up to these two boning. The dark and the lights coming together to make a nice mixture of something sassy, something angry, something beautiful. Probably an inbred kid because they're related. What are we doing there, 3PO? It's like a collection of all the old Star Wars memorabilia from the old movies. There's droids of every shape and color. There's a blow dryer. There's probably like a battle bot from one of the originals. I don't know the names of any of them but I'm gonna pretend like I do so just scratch that last part. Scratch that last part. Don't say I said battle bot. There's a technical name for it. Look it up. We'll put it back in. If you leave this in, I will murder you and your kids. Hate you, carrot. And change your name. You're a vegetable. That's not a name. That's something you eat. If you're a pathetic loser who likes health. Taking one last look, sir. As my friends. Yes, our heroes mowing down stormtroopers that were taken from their families in brainwash to be bad who don't know any better. I love slaughtering people. That's my fish. Connection they have raised showing a tear for a woman that she met like twice. So beautiful. They have such a good relationship. You would stop. Oh, this movie's played with my heartstrings. These haven't such a good time because that's what Star Wars is. It's fun. It's just fun. Kind of like the last Jedi and how fun that movie was. How fun it was. To watch Luke die in a rock by himself like a stupid little Jedi bitch. Oh, it was cool that he didn't throw a punch. He didn't throw a single punch as a Jedi. He didn't throw a punch. That makes him cool. That makes him better than all the other Jedi's who use their lightsabers. The lightsabers I paid to watch being used in battle. Oh, I forgot. I forgot I went to a pacifist movie. I forgot I went to a movie where I don't want to watch my hero fight. I want to watch him kneel on a rock like he's given, like he's given a head to a sith before phoning it in. He phoned a friend to go down there and fight his battle for him before dying alone on a rock after leaving a mysterious map to his whereabouts so that people won't find him and won't ask for help. That's what I wanted from my movie, Ryan Johnson. Thank you, Ryan Johnson, for not ruining Star Wars. Don't worry though. Princess Leia has magical abilities. She can fly around space. She can survive the cold vacuum of death, script, and she's back even though she's dead. Mark Hamill in this movie, I don't know, he's still alive, so probably not because we're doing things in reverse. We're doing things ass backwards. We're playing UNO and I just got the reverse card the whole time. Oh, Star Wars is going this way. Let's go this way, Ryan Johnson. Let's go this way, Ryan Johnson. You mother fuck! Finish the trailer. Let's finish the trailer. The saga will end. The saga will end again, I guess. Cause it already ended in the last movie. Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Are those the space horses from Last Jedi? Yes! I was hoping we could wrap up that fantastic storyline. Where's broom boy at? Is broom boy on one of those horses leading the charge? I think he is. I think he should be. I think he is. I think he should be. More stuffs happening, more stuffs happening. There's the emperor coming down. He never died. He's been alive the whole time. So what Luke did was useless in the original trilogy. He didn't accomplish anything. He just went away while the empire rose back up and rebranded themselves. Cause, you know, whatever, okay. I can't, I can't, I can't pretend to be happy about this movie. I can't, I just, I don't have it in me, carrot! Just let's wrap it up, okay. From hearing Luke Skywalker and my caring fish, Princess Leia talking over her. They're talking to Rey. Cause they have such an emotional connection to her and a spiritual connection. Cause they've known her so well and we've grown with these characters so much in the last two films. Yes! Love what they've done with my Star Wars. Thank you for watching the video. Cringe crew, where are you at? Sound out in the comments. Hit that notification bell. If you wanna get videos, if you wanna get informed about upcoming videos you gotta hit the bell. You just gotta do it. All right, bye everybody. Much like Luke Skywalker, I'm ghost. Ha ha ha ha!