 Are you coming, love? Ha ha ha ha ha! So cringey, dear. Stop looking at me. Stop. Slash pet. If you pet a cat girl, she's gonna stalk you. Is that what they do? Do they follow you if you pet them? Ah! Why are you back? What do you want? What did I do? Stop. I don't want cooties. Would you mind telling me what that was? If I only knew, a denizen of the void Don't suppose the answer came to you in a dream. No sooner did you fell the beast than you fell asleep. Too much ether, no doubt. I must return and report this at once. I leave Lady Lillera in your capable hands. How dare you pass me about like a swaddled babe. Swaddle? I shall return and tell them myself. Quit your complaining. As you wish, your impetuousness. Until then. You try and stay awake. Somebody said no, not you two as Fandas Wild Dead. No, just because I'm not doing how many times have I not played Wow on stream? Twitch is not the end of the world. It is something that's big. But especially if you play Final Fantasy 14, you know this better than anybody. That just because there's not a lot of viewers on Twitch watching something doesn't mean that there's not a lot of people playing it. That is exactly what it was for Final Fantasy 14 for years. Okay, next question. We got to report back to Papa Sean, okay? Thank the gods you've returned. You had us all so worried. But I have already given you the cause to leave Papa Sean. You and the people of Oda. I apologize for causing you one door worry Papa Sean. I shall refrain from traveling unescorted in the future. Why does this child have a Colonel Sanders beer and mustache? That child is 15,000 years old. I cannot thank you enough as Fandas. Look at him. Look at the cut scene you almost said. I see you meant Thinkrad. He's a scholar who spends his days investigating other bees than this either. He's rather too fond of the sound of his own voice for my liking, but perfectly harmless. As for you as Fandas, you're just a sort of venture we need around here. I pray you show the same kindness to the people of Fandaland as you did to us today. Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum. Yikes, what is that 1994 jumping animation? Dude, I played vanilla Wow. I'm not complaining about no jumping animations. I will say this. The movement in this game feels wonderful. It feels just like Wow. Why is everyone old? They're not old. It's anime. They're all 80,000 years old. The younger they look, the older they are. Word is a black brush station solely on demand. Bloke by the name awareness hoping to bolster the numbers for a short term assignment or two. If you fancy putting a few extra gill in your pocket, you could do a lot worse. Is there chat bubbles? What? Why is there no chat bubbles in this game? Dude, I hate this game because there's no chat bubbles, dude. I hate this game, man. This game is like from frickin' the Stone Age. Negative 50 out of 10. ZuzuMeta wishes to share with you a most amazing rumor. Ah, the altruistic adventurer. I was hoping we'd bump into each other. Rumor has it that a vast, untapped vein of a ore beneath the ruins of Seldi, inconceivably, the concern appears to be entirely ignorant of its existence. And even as we speak, a young upstart, a self-made immersion from Stone's throw-in-all places is moving to claim it. They say his master plan is to use his new fortune to curry favor with the Sarcarium. With that eventuality, it may yet be a little way off, but in the present, he is moving ahead with his plans and assembling a team to survey the site. Uh, let's see. Speak with Weistin. Oh, I'm this way. Weistin. Hmm. Come to join? Sorry, but you're late. Some brass blades looking for expert coin volunteered, and the team's already en route to the ruins. But look, I know it's not easy to find work these days. If you're interested, there's something else you can do for me. There are children outside, little ones from Stone's throw. I look after them when I have time to spare, and so they've taken to following me around. And they like to rub their hands, you know, put down my legs and feel the hair. As fan, it was a joke. It was the Biden thing. Okay. I ain't going nowhere, mister. I'm too hungry to move. Besides, you don't have to carry me. Hey, take this cookie. A cookie? Well, if Weistin really wants me to go home, then all right. But I want two next time. Here, take this cookie. Weistin's worried about us? Oh, well, I don't want to make him worried. I'm a good girl. Oh. I'm a good girl. Say I'll go home. I didn't see her face. I just made a voice. Thank you, adventurer. I only wish I could do more. Stone's throw is no place for a child. Not that my childhood was much happier. Never enough food to go around, nor work to earn it. I'll buy the exclamation rights and start my own mining business. Then I'll give my fellow refugees the work they're crying out for and pay them fairly. The mining companies have profited from our suffering for too long. We will reclaim our dignity within our place within those walls. We found her. We found the vein. Weistin, you must come and see. Get your hands off my penis. Already amazing. We will leave at once. You shall join me, my friend. Come and bear witness to history in the making. Okay, let's follow Weistin. Wait, Weistin, where are you at, dog? So I can just go down there. I don't actually have to follow. It's not like an escort. As Vin, there is a MILF party going down by digital cactus. Come on, bro. Chat, listen. The S-Ban TV? It stands for Turbo Virgin. What am I gonna do at a MILF party? When I could be leveling. Literal waste of time. Level sync is in effect way down in the hole. Thou's ball, son. A vein of horror in the middle of a ruined, bloody city. Goddamn idiot. What did you think was gonna happen? That you'd strike it rich and get cozy with the order. While the masters have all done, no one crosses the syndicate. Well, look at this. Not all your friends deserted you. It seems lucky boy. Now you won't have time to die alone. The voice of creation grant ye this humble stone of soul that it may wake to life. Huh. Who's that spoutin' gibberish? Show yourself. The dementors. This ain't part of the plan. Bloody hells. Does Lord Lolorito mean to kill us too? Oh, shit. Duty commenced. Defeat the clay gollum. Man, I'll whip the clay gollums ass. One. Two. Stun. Okay. Damage, damage. The stun is over. So I can mitigate. Wait, dude, this- Hey, this idiot NPC is keyboard turning, dude. What is he doing? Damn. Nice. Owned. Damn. Seems like I've missed all the fun. I see you didn't need my help this time. Why was there one quest that was like randomly voiced? Oh wait, this is a flashback, right? Oh, we gotta do flashback. I would compose a ballot in your honor, but I fear no words would do you justice. The songstress of Old Dao herself could not rival your beauty. Oh, stop it. I have oft heard it said that a Blossom's beauty can move a man to love and lawn, but I never truly believed it until I met you two desert roses. Thancred is a Chad, not a simp. Dude, Thancred looks like a freakin' seventh grade football player. Here they attacked another caravan, and business is sovereign for it. Bloody Amalja. We'll stir them up, do you reckon? Another raid. I'll wager that caravan was carrying crystals. If they truly mean to summon a primal, we must act quickly. Are you coming, love? Oh, cringey, dude. At this raid, crane will soon be more precious than gold. A result of the uncommonly bad harvests, to be sure. And we have you to thank for them, do we not? Hey, buddy, why are you talking to yourself over there? You need to see a doctor? You need some help, son? Time to focus. No more gallivanting about like before. The scions are counting on you. Hmm, this disturbance is recent. The Sultan Tree may be Pappaschan will know something of it. This fan, I can't smell. Please show the subtitles. It's me. I was too late. Our person of interest has already quit the scene. The general? Very well. I shall be there. Anon. Anonymous? Wait, is this, is this 4chan? My colleagues went to Great Lakes to provide me with the means to detect atheric disturbances. But every time I find one, you seem to be in the middle of it. Tread softly, my friend. The carefully laid trap you dismantled was clearly sanctioned by Lord Lolorito. I hear the blades mention him as they fled. Believe me when I tell you, he's not a man to be trifled with. I would sneak to you further, but it isn't safe for us to linger. Find me at the coffer and coffin later. Until then, stay safe. I hope next we meet is, it is under more auspicious circumstances. Farewell. People talk. Cool. Yeah, everybody says when I do that I sound like Seer. Well, bless you, my friend. You've risked your life to save ours. I was a fool to trust those men. Did you question their motives from the start? Even so, I could hardly have predicted that the wealthiest man in Uldar would have wanted me dead for the heinous crime of seeking to change the law. If I stay in Uldar any longer, I am as good as dead. Maybe you should seek the counsel of Mistress Momoti. Okay, we're talking to Momoti again? Settle down, S-Fan. You've got nothing to worry about. No one seems to know you were at the ruins. Why, I asked you on the other hand, is now a pariah. Welcome round here is a rabid wolf, poor bugger. Lord Lola Rideau, generous contributor to the Order of Naut Dahl and member of the syndicate, didn't get to where he is by leaving loose ends, that one, which is why he ain't above killing his own men. Don't let this color your view of Uldar, S-Fan. It's true that there are some here who ain't afraid to crack a few skulls if it gets them what they want. But most of us are decent folks just trying to make ends meet. A lot of people would call you a damn fool for risking your life to save a marked man. But I believe you did a good thing, S-Fan. And for that, you have my respect. I'll have the boys at the hourglass have you set up with a room, my treat. Just have a word with a topa potopa whenever you feel like staying. And when you've got your appetite for adventuring back, consider taking on a guild leave or two. We've got a lot of requests from locals looking to hire adventurers for various jobs. It'd be a good way for you to earn yourself some extra guild. So happens, I know a fella by the name of Dinen. He's asked that I send you any looking that I send any looking for work his way. You can find him over in Horizon if you fancy. Off you go then. I haven't got all day to be holding your bloody hand. What are you? Oh my gosh. Dude, I was literally just gonna say are you working at Starbucks? And her name is Coffee Cuban. Stop walking. Stop looking at me. Stop. Stop it. You're creeping me out the way it like walks so slow. Pet? How do you pet? Slash pet. We got him? What did you do? I'm leaving. Pepe run. Is she gonna murder me? If you pet a cat girl, she's gonna stalk you. It's great seeing you interact with other men that way. That's not... I don't think... I don't know what that is. I think it's a serial killer. Hi, have you heard of the news about the goblet? It is to reaction off to bidders regardless of their origins. I beg your pardon, sir. It isn't that I dislike adventurers. Far from it. Wait, what the? But when you consider that old ass downstairs, they got it. Why are you back? You pet her? Is that what they do? Do they follow you if you pet them? Why are you looking at me like that? You'll get me like I did something wrong. She's just trying to give you coffee? Is this your boss? My wife is out on a date with her girlfriend. Wait, what's happening? What is happening? No, don't do that. Is that a hug? What are you doing? Look, listen. You have to stop following me. Your boss is pissed. The manager is pissed. Because now he has nobody. He doesn't have a barista working the damn desk. So you need to leave. Look how pissed off he is. What do you want? What did I do? Just accept your goddamn... Oh, wait. How do I accept my coffee? Trade her? How do I trade? That didn't sound like a trade. Espresso con panna. Coffee biscuit. Stop. I don't want cooties. Okay. Bye. And also please don't murder me. Goodbye. Why do I wave like that? I'm like freaking calling down an airplane. My guy is so socially inept. Pepe run. Ladies, please give Mr. Television breathing room. Socially inept. Complete and total character immersion. No. Listen, I'm a social expert. Uh, I gotta speak with that in it. A fan I presume? Aye. Momori said to expect you. And so I have. Welcome to Horizon. Ours is a trading sentiment that sees goods in from the Port of Zespere Bay to the West. Then trade we do. Nearly a day goes by that Horizon isn't bustling with some manner of merchants and officials. They keep us running about busy they do. Enough so that I wish I had chocobo legs in place of my own. And that's why I asked Momori to send me any souls looking for work. And that Dananin would like you to deliver message to Copper Bell Mines. Okay, Western Valinan. Complete total rhyming. Why do you guys walk to me like that? Step or step my feet walking. That's been trade me. Wait, who? Wait, you're back. Pay for coffee. I don't have any money. Is she still here? My mouth. That's my mail. We're out there. The heck? Is that a Batmobile? What about the auctions? Have you? First, approach me this eve. In an effort to encourage immigration to our great nation, all lands within the goblet are to be set aside for adventures like yourself. If you wish to know more about the goblet, speak with a recruit. They shouldn't just pass the entrance. He will be happy to assist you. Okay, so I can go all the way down here to the goblet. I need to go back to the horizon first. Boopa Luopa wants to track down a missing courier. Pray allow me to lift your aid, brave adventurer. I would have you ascertain the whereabouts of a myth that I sent to Laos to hope the other day. Captain Leofrick has stationed there. Ever since he was transferred, we've been exchanged for leathers. But never before has it taken this long to receive a reply. After this, you focus your thirds on the road to Black Wrath station in central Fallenand. With luck, you will find her quickly. Okay, I'm level 15. Is that good or bad for first time? Very good. Very good.