 You are trapped in the dark cellar of your home besides you is the murdered body of your wife And above at the front door are your friends looking for you tracking you down Cutting off your escape Escape produced and directed by William N. Robson and carefully contrived to free you from the four walls of today For a half hour of high adventure Tonight we escape to a university town in England and a household where hateful sway as we listen to John Collier's famous story Back for Christmas Yes, my dear Why just a little digging Why may I ask have you chosen this day of all days to dig up the cellar floor? Why I thought as the weather has been so damp This would be an excellent time to plant my devil's garden Garden, whatever nonsense is that? Oh, that's my little joke about it You see I've managed to secure some of the spores of several unclassified wild orchids in their natural state They bloom under damp masses of leaf mold the oricanian Indians call them Devil flowers because they appear to bloom under the ground Well, I'm sure the oricanian Indians will be very interested if you succeed in growing these ridiculous flowers under the cellar floor Whom else it'll interest I can't imagine What's that terrible smell? Well, that's the leaf mold my dear Chemically identical with the earth blanket. They grow under in the wild state I really should line the pit with concrete so as to prevent seepage from this foreign soil But I don't suppose there'll be time for it now. There certainly will not be time for it Do you realize that we're sailing for America a week from today and you've made no arrangements whatever Unless you're called digging a hole in the cellar making arrangements. I certainly don't Devil's garden indeed. Sometimes I think you're going soft in the head Herbert Well, I suppose it's inconsiderate of me, but you see I've been wanting to try this experiment for a long time But what with my lectures and seminars at the university there never seemed to be time Well, there certainly isn't any time for it now I suppose you've forgotten I made an appointment for you at the barbers this afternoon Oh, must I shave off my beard Hermione? Now, we've been all through that. Of course you must They don't wear beards in America go and get your jacket on and do as I tell you Yes, Hermione and don't forget to take your umbrella. It looks like rain. Yes, Hermione Oh, don't look so putt upon Herbert Someone has to plan things in this house or you'd never even get to the university and time for your lectures Much less make arrangements for a trip to America. I know, but what of my specimens? There'll be plenty of time to plant your precious devil's garden when you get home from America We're not going to be gone forever. You know, we'll be back here for Christmas. Yes, of course Back for Christmas. I'd forgotten but try to remember it and if you can't do that just do as I tell you I've been making the plans in this house for 20 years and if there's any digging to be done I'll manage that as well. You understand Herbert? Yes, Hermione. Good. You have just 20 minutes to clean this mess up down here and keep your appointment at the barbers And when you finish there, I want you to come straight home Well, I I wanted to stop at Miss Markham's and pick up some books I ordered Well, all right, but don't loiter there the whole afternoon browsing over those old books the way you usually do Now hurry and clear up this rubbish get rid of that smelly stuff and no more digging mind you. Yes, Hermione Yes, Hermione How many years have I been saying that 10 years 15 20 clear up the rubbish? Yes, Hermione. Don't forget your umbrella. Yes, Hermione. Do this do that. Yes, Hermione. Yes, yes, yes How much longer can I stand this? Good evening, sir. Good evening, Miss Markham Why it's Professor Carpenter, isn't it? You didn't recognize me. Oh You look ever so much younger without the beard 20 years at least 20 years You'll be glad to know those books you ordered have finally arrived. Hmm books Phytotomy of phalloid gematophytes Anchoner for us shrubs of North America Those are the ones you ordered aren't they? Oh, yes. Yes. Thank you You're very kind miss markham Why kind professor carpenter? Well, not many young ladies in bookshops would go out of their way to look up rare books for an old professor of botany Oh, why you're not old professor carpenter Really, you looked oh on this side. I adore botany It's my particular hobby. Oh, really? Oh, you never told me that before miss markham. Oh, I was afraid to You were so so imposing with the beard and all. Well, I You might be interested in some specimens of alpine polyanthes that were sent to me by a friend in switzerland Switzerland I used to go there for my holidays before the war. You like switzerland. I love every part of it The lakes the mountains The beautiful spring flowers Especially the flowers. Oh, yes It seems we have quite a lot in common miss markham. I'm I'm sorry we haven't talked before Oh I am too It is all the fault of the beard I suppose Miss markham, forgive me if this sounds foolish, but I feel that shaving off my beard is the most important thing i've done for 20 years. Oh, it is. I'm sure it is I'm ashamed that I've been so distant with you all the time Or there were times when I almost spoke up Times when you came in here tired after a day with your students at the university Oh, you seem so alone The way I'm alone in the world I'd like to have asked you to stay a while and talk with me But some way or other I I wound up giving you your change and letting you go on your way Hugh You say you're all alone in the world Since my father died. Well, did you never think of marrying? My father was a very remarkable man I never found anyone who seemed to measure up to what he led me to expect of men And then the war came miss markham. I It's been so long since anyone called me by my first name I'd like you to if you don't mind It's maryon maryon And yours? Herbert How long have you been alone herbert alone? Oh, I knew you were a widow. Of course the first time I saw you A widower Oh, I can always tell There's a certain sadness in a man's eyes A sweet sadness. I think when he's been married and then a widower I never thought of it in quite that way or perhaps I shouldn't be talking like this But I've often wondered what she must have been like Your wife, I mean am I any Not an easy woman to forget Very strong Always managing things the house my wardrobe my friends when we dined at a restaurant. She even ordered my food She was always managing things You might say she Managed herself to death Oh poor woman She must have loved you very much But she need to put herself out. So It's plain to see you don't need things managed for you You need Companionship, I think someone sympathetic with your work But the last thing on earth you need is a manager. Oh, well you put it The last thing on earth That's the first time I thought of it, of course But suddenly a whole new world opened up before my eyes Marion and America No more of her mind is planning my life for me By the time I got home my mind was working overtime. Well at last you certainly took long enough about it What are you looking so pleased about? I don't really know Getting rid of the beard perhaps. I feel 20 years younger. You look even smaller Your face looks triangular or something I'd forgotten your chin was so weak Oh, but never mind that you can grow it back soon enough after Christmas. Where are you going down to the cellar? I just bought this electric lantern and I thought I'd put it away down there Now whatever possessed you to buy a thing like that. I don't know. I'd rather like this lantern Might come in handy Who knows now Herbert don't start digging down there again I have a hundred things to do putting the house in order before we leave I want you to carry those boxes upstairs for me Yes, sir. My name and if you're going down to the cellar take this along and stuff it into the furnace But this is my old bathrobe. I may need it. Oh, nonsense. I bought you a new one get rid of it And don't start puttering down there with that devil's garden or whatever you call it I'm through digging my dear I think the pit is quite deep enough now For my devil's garden It would all have to be carefully planned of course Just as carefully planned as Hermione was planning the trip to America We both went about our respective engagements as the days passed I spent all the time I could with Marion and finally she consented And then it was the last day of the big day the day we were to sail for America Operator operator. Are you there? I'm still waiting on that call to Salisbury Oh, we'll put them on quickly Hello Is this paul holtonsons? Mrs. Herbert carpenter here. Did you receive my letter? Oh good. Now remember we'll be back for Christmas and I want the job done without fail What's there? Oh, no, I'm sure he doesn't suspect anything send the bill to me in new york as I instructed you Oh, thank you. Thank you so much Oh, there you are Herbert. Where have you been back steered? I dismissed the servants Dismissed the servants But I've asked some friends into a farewell tea Go and tell them it's a mistake. I'm afraid it's too late now They've packed and gone. Oh, you have messed up things properly How many times have I told you to leave things to me? I make the plans around here Yes, Hermione You'll have to do better than this when I plan the trip home Or we'll never in the world be back for Christmas back for Christmas back for Christmas Must you keep saying that? Why not? We are coming back for Christmas, aren't we? Supposing I were offered a professorship in one of those wealthy American universities Nonsense Americans care nothing for botany Luther Burbank was an American Well, that's different. What have you ever done except muck around in the dirt with a lot of rots and tubers They've asked me to lecture that means something Of course they asked you to lecture Americans are paid here any foreigner deliver a lecture once Now there's no use getting yourself in a state about this Herbert No doubt this extra money will come in very handy when we arrive back for Christmas Precisely And it's no good. You're making a joke of it Heaven knows where you'd be today if I hadn't got a sense of time Yes, my dear Hermione and since you've been so foolish as to dismiss the servants You may empty the ashtrays and straighten up this room while we're waiting for the guests to arrive I am going upstairs to change Call me when they get here. Yes, Hermione Yes, Hermione. Yes, Hermione for 20 years. Hermione always so right thought of everything Well, not quite everything She's dressing now safe to call Marion Oh if Marion were to change of mind now if she had any idea. I was not a widower Hello Hello, Marion Herbert No, no my darling nothing's wrong My plans are the same Unless you've changed Good we'll meet in new york as we planned Yes, yes, I do love you my darling I'm sorry. I can't talk any longer Yes, I I'll meet you in new york a week from tomorrow without fail Goodbye till then We're talking on the phone just now. Yes, Hermione. Whoever was it? Freddy Freddy's in clear, of course Oh, didn't I hear you say something about meeting somebody in new york? Why yes Old freddy said he might possibly get out to america before we leave and I said of course we'd meet him there if he decides to go That seems very peculiar But then all of your friends are peculiar Yes, Hermione and just look at your jacket. Have you been digging in that cellar again? Yes, Hermione. Well, there's no need for it You can't possibly get that devil's garden thing finished go and change your clothes before the guests arrive Yes, oh never mind. I see somebody coming up the walk now go and let them in Yes, Hermione Yes, my dear look out the window There's professor and mrs. Hewitt But who's that with them? Why I Why precisely freddy's in claire Peculiar you should have been talking to him on the phone not three minutes ago and now here he is Yes Yes, isn't it? But then as you say, Hermione All of my friends are peculiar not half so peculiar as you Digging in the cellar an hour before we leave for america. Just look at yourself And now that I think of it. Yes, Hermione. Oh never mind go and let them in You were going to ask me something Hermione But the whole I'm digging in the cellar. Oh good heavens stop rolling your eyes about that way One would think you were digging a grave down there instead of a storage bin Yes, Hermione. Was that I said yes, Hermione. Oh bother open the door and stop saying yes, Hermione I think my dear I've said it for the last time Back for christmas Hermione was so positive we would be back for christmas That last afternoon pouring tea for a few friends who had come in to say last minute farewells. She kept reiterating Oh, I promise you mrs. Hewitt. Remember we absolutely must have you with us for christmas Oh, we'll be back. It's not absolutely certain of course. Oh, but what do you mean? It's not certain of course It's certain After all Herbert old boy you've contracted to lecture for only three months quite right, but then of course Anything may happen. Oh Herbert adores being unpredictable Now what Arthur man would dig a great hole in the cellar on the very day. He was leaving for america a hole in the cellar Yes He's going to put some unclassified wild orchids down there a devil's garden if you please Sounds mysterious That's Herbert though. He's really quite simple once you find out what he's up to Now take that telephone call he put through to you a few moments before you arrive freddy To me. Yes Herbert wanted to surprise me about your plan to meet us in new york next month That's why he called of course to ask you not to mention it But my dear Hermione Herbert couldn't possibly have telephoned me within the past hour I've been walking in the park since three He didn't telephone you. Well, how could he and is for my going to america come come freddy You may as well own up Hermione is found me out again, but Herbert old chap. I really don't understand You see what a poor liar Herbert makes his red as a beetroot Aren't you ashamed of yourself professor stringing poor Hermione along like that and as for you freddy I'm furious you said nothing to us about going to america But look here old girl. I've been trying to tell everyone that I have no stuff and nonsense the game's gone on long enough Perhaps Herbert's merely planning a surprise for me. Yes, let's leave it at that my dear Well, we must start getting ready. It was marvelous of you to come in to say goodbye And don't worry about Herbert's little jokes. I will bring him back for Christmas. You may rely on it They all believed her For years she'd been promising me for dinner parties garden parties committees And the promises had always been kept This time they wouldn't be I'd seen to that The servants were gone for good the farewells all said I had time to the minute how long it would take to fill in the hole in the cellar In my devil's garden Upstairs in the bedroom I undressed Folded my clothes over a chair and put on my old bathrobe Then I opened the door into Hermione's room. Are you ready Herbert? Hermione, have you a moment to spare? Of course, my dear, I've just finished. Then do come in here for a moment. There's something rather extraordinary here Good heavens, Herbert. What are you lounging about in that filthy old bathroom for? I told you to put it into the furnace. I shall do it today. Yes, I really will. I promise Well, high time. Now, what is it you want to show me? In the bathroom here. Just look Who in the world do you suppose dropped a gold chain down the bathtub drain? Nobody has, of course. Nobody wears such a thing in this house Then what's it doing there? I don't see anything Well, here, I'll hold this flashlight for you. If you lean right over You can see it shining deep down. Oh, such a lot of nonsense. Just wisdom I don't see it Herbert. Go on looking, Hermione. In just a moment Herbert, I absolutely refuse to wait Herbert, what are you doing? Take your hands off my neck I will, Hermione, just as soon as I've finished the arrangements for my trip to America What are you talking about? You thought you were the only one who could plan things, didn't you, Hermione? Well, I've been making some plans of my own this past week In exactly two minutes you'll be dead, Hermione You see, two minutes. I've planned it very accurately You'll never get away with it. Let me go I thought you'd say that, but I will get away with it You won't mind the smell of the leafmold down in the cellar when I take you there today Yes That's where you're going, Hermione. Into my devil's garden that annoyed you so much The soil is full of clay. It won't settle too much In a month or so it won't even look as if it had been dug up My friends, they all expect me back for Christmas. They don't hear from me. They'll wonder If I don't come back, they'll start asking questions Oh no, they won't Because you'll write them letters, Hermione And the typewriters you always do They'll be signed each in that neat cryptic way you always sign your notes to your friends No It won't work, Hermione, but you never were any good at planning things Oh, but I've changed, my dear. I've learned from watching you all these years The lecture people in America, they'll expect you to be traveling with your wife I will be traveling with my wife, but her name will not be Hermione Fortunately, they'd never met you I'll write a few letters home for you, then fewer and fewer Write letters signed with my own name, always expecting to get back, but never quite able to Keep the house one year and then another and another. They'll get used to it Might even come back alone in a year or two and clear it up properly Say you died in America Nobody will ever suspect you're lying under the floor of the cellar in this very house So, but it won't work, I'll tell you That pit you dug at the cellar, I'm telling you I can assure you, my dear Hermione, it'll serve its purpose well Sorry, my dear, I've got to get this done on schedule You have just five seconds to say your prayers Oh, but you must listen The cellar! Don't do it, Herbert! Herbert! Oh! The water cut off at the main as I knew she would order it She was so thorough, but so was I Strangulation, nothing to wash up The electric current shut off exactly at one o'clock, just as she ordered it She thought of everything, so did I My nice new electric lantern, plenty of light to work by in the cellar The old bathrobe she wanted me to throw away came in handy Now if there should be any chance, blood stain Then enter the fire with it afterwards, the last evidence of my devil's garden It was going well, still an hour till I had to leave for the boat The hold was almost filled No, oh no, not now Go away, please, whoever you are, go away Did I lock the front door? If it's the Wallingfords, oh no, no Go away, go away I say, Herbert, don't think Woo-hoo, how about it? Just keep calm, quiet They won't look down in the cellar, keep calm They'll go away Oh, how dickens can they be? Oh, the shop's maybe, something's the last minute No, I'm at her bayonet Shall I shout? Oh, don't, might not be tense No harm in a shout, my love No, let's come in our way back Her bayonet said they wouldn't leave till seven No, all right, only I want a last drink with old her But he'd be hurt, you know All right, that's hurry We can be back by half past six Half past six There's still time After that it was easy Put the finishing touches on the devil's garden Dress fast, get out of the house before six thirty Take the boat trade to Southampton And board the ship for America All according to plan Hermione's plan I say, steward Right, sir My wife is indisposed She'll be taking her meals in our stateroom For the old voyage? Yes, for the whole voyage I prost to your wife is feeling better This morning, Professor Carpentier Yes, a little Not yet well enough to leave her cabin Oh, I'm sorry Oh, by the way, here's a copy of the radiogram You sent for your wife last evening Oh, oh, thank you I'll just check it over I say, look here What is it? Did the typist make a mistake? No, no, nothing important She can correct it later For a moment I had the feeling that Hermione had been leaning over my shoulder again Correcting what I'd written as she always did I had written a radiogram to Professor Hewitt and his wife Haven't been out of my cabin the whole beastly trip Herbert, well We now doubt we will be back for Christmas The copy read We no doubt will be back for Christmas Exactly what Hermione would have written The rest of the voyage was uneventful And Mary and I met in New York And were married just as we'd planned Professor and Mrs. Carpenter, we have reservations, I believe Oh, yes, we've been expecting you, sir Boy, thank Professor and Mrs. Carpenter's luggage up to their suite You know, Mrs. Carpenter, you're quite a surprise Your letter reserving the rooms was so, uh, thorough I was expecting an older, more forbidding sort of person, frankly, ma'am Oh, no, as a matter of fact, we're just married But my letter reserving the rooms I wrote the letter, my dear, and signed it, Mrs. Herbert Carpenter Purely a joke Oh, what a cunning old fox you are, Herbert Now that I think of it, I am, rather Oh, I almost forgot, there's a letter for you, Mrs. Carpenter A letter for me? I wonder who knows? Well, we shall find out in good time Come along, my dear, we're keeping the boy waiting Nothing like a cold brisk shower to put a man's rights Herbert, this letter Oh, yes, the letter, dry my hair, will you, dear? It seems to be a bill of some sort From a building contract in Salisbury Oh, bother, dry your own hair Oh, thank you, my sweet Let's see this bill, or whatever it is It's very puzzling Herbert Hmm? You were a widower, weren't you? I mean, Hermione isn't still alive I can assure you she is not Let's have that letter Dear Madam, this is to acknowledge your order Together with the key, together With the keys to your house in Launston Place Our men had no difficulty in finding the place Where your husband had begun the excavation in the cellar But apparently changed his mind at the last moment And filled it in again Oh, no What is it, Herbert? Our men will begin digging tomorrow And you may rest assured that it will be a professional job And will be completed in ample time For your surprise Christmas present to your husband We are happy to be conspirators with you in this thoughtful gesture And hope that Professor Carpenter will be pleased At the results of our work On what he so quaintly calls his devil's garden Very truly yours, Paul Holton's son's contractors What does it mean, Herbert? It means that Hermione was right I will be I will be Back for Christmas Escape is produced and directed by William N. Robeson And tonight brought you Back for Christmas by John Collier Adapted for radio by Robert Tollman With Paul Freese as Herbert Eleanor Oddley as Hermione And Marta Metrovich as Marion Music is conceived and conducted by Cy Fuhrer Next week You were lost in a London fog Exhausted and frantic Unsure of the figures looming around you Are real for creatures of your fear And behind you pursuing you intent on killing you Lurks a murderer from whom you must escape Next week we escape with Elgin and Blackwood's Ghostly Story Confession Good night then until this same time next week When again we offer you escape This is CBS The Columbia Broadcasting System