 ready for the new place that God wants to launch you, catapult you out today. We are so glad you're joining us for hope today. It is St. Patrick's Day. We'll talk about that in a moment, but we have an incredible guest coming up in here with Pastor Jay and Anna. And Anna, tell us about what we're gonna dive into. Today. It's gonna be good. We're trying to balance the fun on the Friday here talking about St. Patrick's Day. And also, we still like to bring you good wholesome, deep conversation. And we've been talking about shame around here, the toxic emotion is increasingly being brought into the light so we can be healed and free. That's what we want. And we heard before last week that it's a cancerous emotion and impacts our heart and our mind. So there's body shaming, mom shaming, religious shaming. The messages we receive from the time where little can be overt or subtle. And our guest today, Jasmine L. Holmes, joins us in just a few minutes to address the issue and how the gospel puts an end to the story of shame. The gospel is truly good news day. It is. Matter of fact, we have to call this Shame Free Fridays. Last Friday, we talked about shame and we're gonna go a little deeper today. And there are a lot of people battle with that. I think shame is a weapon of the enemy. We talked about it last week, how guilt means you've done something wrong. Shame means there's something wrong with you and it's hard to be victorious when your mind defeats yourself. Low self-esteem or shame, as essence of a type of low self-esteem, is mind against self. And you can't go any further in life than your ability to be free from shame. So if you know anybody that's battling with it, if you're battling with it, this is Shame Free Friday. God's gonna release you into a new dimension. I'm excited. I'm glad we called it Shame Free Friday because it's so important so we'd be set free from those bondages over our minds. And one thing I've heard therapists talk about, like one thing, it's spiritual too with our mind. We have to be renewed, be transformed by the renewing of our mind. And one thing that we have to do when it comes to shame is we have to change the way we think because actually the way I've heard, like when you change the way your thoughts, it shifts like the neuro pathways in your brain. So there's a rewiring, but isn't it incredible? That's how God has created us, Anna, is that the way with our mind that we can think something, connect with him and it can set us on a new trajectory. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, God's word has so much power to really transform a person's life. Like no matter what you've had happen to you in the past, like God can literally, he would like never waste your pain. He always brings purpose out of your pain. And we mentioned today's St. Patrick's Day. So happy St. Patrick's Day. And I mean, a lot of us around here know St. Patrick is like a lot of partying and things like that. But do you know the story of St. Patrick? Like talk about God using past experiences for such a purpose. So at just 16 years old, St. Patrick was, so he was born in Britain and he was actually kidnapped by a bunch of pirates. Like it kind of sounds like a storybook, but he was taken to Ireland by these pirates and enslaved for a number of years. And then he had this dream about escaping from the slaver and he actually did escape. And he went back home to Britain. He was reunited with his family. But then as an adult, he felt God was calling him back to Ireland to actually share the good news of Jesus with the people who had enslaved him. And so the story continues that he brought so many to Christ. He's actually the one that they say brought Christianity to Ireland. So truly, I mean, God can do anything with a life that is surrendered to him and is willing to go after the calling that God has on their lives. So our guest today, Jasmine L. Holmes, joins us to share her personal experience of slowly lifting the cloak of shame that had become her near constant companion and how she rested in Jesus Christ who had taken all the shame away. We invite you, our dear viewer, into your own journey of identifying, battling and conquering shame with Christ-centered and gospel-driven principles. So Jasmine, welcome to Hope Today. Thank you so much for having me. It's so good to have you with us just to be able to share so vulnerably of your personal experience. So since you're new to our viewers, can you share a little bit about yourself and some of your personal experiences with shame? So I am the mother of three children. I have a six-year-old, four-year-old and an 18-month-old little boy, all boys. And my husband and I live in Jackson, Mississippi. I was a teacher for nine years. I've stepped out of the classroom for the last two and I miss it terribly, but hope to go back someday. And my experiences with shame started really early, I think, to set everything up. I am a pastor's kid and I'm the oldest of nine. So just felt a lot of pressure to be the perfect pastor's kid, pretty much all of my life. Yeah, that's interesting talking about that perfectionism and how often the shame just comes from these expectations that we put on ourself or that maybe others along the way have put on themselves. So tell us a little bit about your journey. Like how early did it start for you? And then when did you realize like it's time to take some serious action to get free from this? It definitely started, I mean, it's one of my first memories is of feeling shame, of feeling that like embarrassment and that wanting to hide. And I don't think that I had a name for it until I was pregnant with my first born son. So I was at the doctor's office, at the therapist's office to talk to her about some perinatal depression. And I was like, okay, we're gonna talk about my fears of motherhood and we're gonna talk about all these things and she's gonna fix me. And so I started talking to her about fears that I had regarding becoming a mother. And she immediately looked at me and goes, have you ever wondered if like maybe you struggle with shame? Has anybody ever said that to you that like shame is a really loud voice in your life? And that was the first time. So in, let's see, 2015, that was the first time that anybody had ever used the word shame to describe the way that I just thought that I was, the way that I thought was normal to be. And then did you find because you were a pastor's kid, you grew up in the church, that there were sort of subtle expectations or maybe they were even straightforward messages about what the good Christian girl was like or the Christian mom or the Christian wife and you felt some shaming through those things? Absolutely. I mean, some overt, some covert. So with me being my mother's daughter and watching her keep this immaculate home while having nine children and homeschooling all of them and being this particular pastor's wife and just, my mom is the type of person when she walks into the room, people are like, oh my gosh, that's your mom? Like, she's so beautiful. She's so put together. She's got everything. And I am like the hurricane version of that woman. And so from a really young age, I was like, okay, there's her, there's me. And instead of kind of thanking God for the diversity that he creates in motherhood, wifehood, womanhood, I was constantly like, oh man, like there's this image that I'm supposed to live up to and I am not. And if my mom was here right now, she would be like shaking her head at me and be like, that's ridiculous. But it's, you don't know how the ideas just grow. Yeah. I absolutely can relate to that, just this idea of what it is to be a perfect Christian mom and the perfect Christian wife. And so tell us a little bit, like in any area of shaming, you mentioned like religious shaming, body shaming, marriage shaming, like all of those, how does somebody begin to get free and what are some ways that Christians try to deal with it that actually doesn't work? So the ways that we often try to deal with it, it's really three separate ways that we try to deal with it. So the first one is I think a fear that people have when they pick up a book like mine is that I'm gonna say, we should just get rid of all shame and all bad feeling at any time. You should just be yourself, even if it hurts other people, you should do what you want, even if it's not the right thing to do. So that would be like the cast it off version, right? We're just gonna get rid of it, we're not gonna examine it, we're not gonna go to the cross with it, we're just gonna silence it. Another way I think that people often use is motivation. So they use it as a way to help them to do better. These are the people that do really well with motivational speakers who kind of make them feel bad about themselves, which sounds crazy, but is like very true, like, you know, get your fat self off the couch and work out type of people. To me, that's like, I'm gonna get, I'm gonna couch harder, I'm gonna get into the corner of the couch and never leave, but for some people that really works for them, my husband is one of those people who like, if he feels bad about himself, he's gonna work double hard to overcome that bad feeling. But it makes you kind of a not compassionate person. And then the third way is to put it onto other people, to try to find somebody who's doing just a little bit worse than you, so that you can feel better about yourself. Ultimately, all of those ways fall short because they're not centered on the author and perfecter of our faith. So Jesus tells Adam and Eve in the garden exactly what he's, God tells Adam and Eve exactly what he's gonna do with their shame in the garden. And it ends with Jesus. It doesn't end with the things that we do to try to get rid of it. Yeah, you do such a good job and your book just bringing the truth of the gospel. Can you share a personal experience of how you use the gospel to specifically help you break free from shame? I would definitely say in my motherhood that's where I felt the most shame and pressure to kind of perform. And I think a lot of other moms can probably relate to whether or not we're going to breastfeed our children for how long, what vaccines are we gonna give them? How are we gonna raise them? Where are they gonna go to school? And I have just had to constantly hold my children with an open hand and trust the Lord that I'm gonna do the best that I can and he is going to do exceedingly better than I could ever do in parenting my children and guiding my children. And so even just something as simple as choosing where my son went to school, I had to stop and say, he's in K-4. You can make a different decision next year. It's okay. Like you don't have to take the perfect steps. And so a lot of it just involves abiding in Christ, a lot of prayerfulness, but also naming the feeling out loud for what it is and allowing people in my community to speak truth into it because shame festers in silence, it festers in darkness, and it festers in isolation. Jev, you know, good question for you. One, why the title of the book? That's the first question that I have. And the second one is, can you give us some practical ways? There's somebody, there's many people. I'm a pastor, I was a PK as well. I can definitely relate, but I acted up. I just cut up. I didn't care what you thought. I was gonna be me. You wanted me to call me crazy, that's fine. I knew eventually I was gonna get to where God called me to be, but I had my little time in the sun there. Anyways, I'm digressing a little bit there, but how do you get some practical principles? I'm battling with shame. I don't feel good about myself. How does your book help us to overcome that? What are some steps that people in their homes can take? So the reason why we called it Never Cast Out is kind of an answer to the question. We took the verse from John that talks about how, you know, Jesus will never cast us out. He will never cast us away. And with shame, there's such a feeling of not belonging. There's such a feeling of impending fear that you're just going to be found wanting. And so having those flagship scriptures that I return to over and over again to remind me of who I am in Christ is huge. Having accountability is also huge. There's a whole chapter in the book about community. And for me, that's church community, right? That's talking to my pastor, talking to my mentors, talking to my husband who lives with me and lives with my shame every single day and telling them exactly what is going on so that I have the tools to face down and so that I have accountability to face it down. But also just, it takes so much radical honesty with yourself and with the people around you to really face down shame. And so I think practically, for me, it's just as simple as having those scriptures available to me to remind myself of who I am in Christ and constantly prayerfully walking with him. I wish it were, I wish I had like a good three step plan for you, but I don't. It's really just prayerfulness and residing the truth to myself over and over again. That's right. Yeah, the truth of God, like his word is so powerful to break down strongholds and set us free from the things that grip us. So Jasmine, we have just a couple of minutes left. Can you speak to the person at home today? Maybe that overwhelmed mom, the wife who is trying to do her best to minister to her husband and take care of the household. Just the one who's feeling stuck in shame. What would you say to them? Christ took all of our shame with him to the cross. And I know that sometimes it doesn't feel like that. A lot of times it doesn't feel like that, but the Bible tells us that creation is groaning for Christ's return, that everything is crying out for him to come back and make all things new. And so many times when we feel shame, that's this groaning inside of us for Jesus, that's this groaning for things to be made right. That's this complication of living in the already and the not yet. Christ has already taken care of everything but he hasn't returned to make all things new just yet. But we can experience a glimpse of that newness every time we run to him and every time we cast our cares and burdens on him and he's waiting, he's there. That's what he wants from us. That's why he came. That's why he died and it's an open invitation. It's always there. That's right. I think about how Jesus said, come to me all you who are weary and heavy laid in and I will give you rest. And so Jasmine, thank you for just speaking the word into our CTVN family today, knowing that in Jesus is rest and Jesus is freedom. Your book again is never cast out how the gospel puts an end to the story of shame. Thank you so much for being with us. Thank you for having me. Well, we want to always give you a bite of the word of God while you're with us. And so we're gonna take a quick break but we'll be right back with that and so much more. Laura called our 24 seven prayer line. She had so much fear that she didn't want to leave her house. She had lost her husband of 54 years, just six months earlier. Laura was flipping through TV stations when she came across Cornerstone television. She felt compelled to call. One of our prayer partners talked, listened and prayed with her for 45 minutes. At the end, Laura said how much the ministry had helped relieve her fear. Praise God for how he's using CTVN. When you give, you become part of what he's doing. This month, when you give, we'll send wild expectants as our way of saying thank you. This book will inspire you to live your life as God intended to give and request your copy. Visit us online at ctvn.org slash donate or call us at 888-665-4483. Hope happens here. Well, if you've been tuning in, we are setting people free from shame. And as Anna mentioned right before our break, that we always like to give you a passage of scripture, Hebrews chapter 12, verse number two. I love this passage. Looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross and he despised the shame and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. You know, as we've been talking, something that came alive in my spirit, I've never saw this before. But I believe that shame is the antithesis to significance. If you are battling with shame, it is because there is significance in your life. Now watch this. Jesus did not allow what he was walking through on the cross. If you look at Hebrews chapter number 12 to determine his significance, he realized I might be in this, but I'm greater than this. And you can't allow what you have gone through, what people have said about you, to determine your significance. The only reason why you were trusted, I'm going to say that again, the only reason why you were trusted to walk through all the pain and the heartache is because of the significance upon you. And what the devil does, he puts a title on us and says, you're not a good mom. You're not a good dad. You're a bad minister. You made these errors. Not understanding, God already knew you were going to walk through all of that. And he wanted us to walk through it, so then he could give us a revelation in it that when he brings us out of it, he could send us back to the very people that need the answers that we have. So I don't know who this is right now and who this is for. But there's some of you watching right now. The only reason why you're battling with shame, God wants you to hear this, is because there is significance in your life and you're greater than you know. And as you begin to seek out the will of God, the plan of God, the mind of God, he's gonna give us significance for our shame, Sidney. Well, you just dropped that past there. That was a whole like two minute sermon. I was like, I'll sit here and were you taking notes? Cause I was like, you know, you said shame is the antithesis to significance. That's powerful. And you know, sometimes I think about, you know, I was just working through this like recently, it's like, what are some of the labels that you've put on yourself that are not from God? That I'm not this, that I'm not that, that I'm not worthy. We have to like eliminate those things and look to the word of God and say, I am this. I am significant. I am a child of God. I am the head and not the tail. You know, I am a daughter of the Most High King. I am the apple of his eye. I mean, there are so many promises in the word of God that you can declare and you can speak over yourself. And there's something about when you declare a thing over yourself, when you begin to break those shackles off of your mind because those words, even those word courses that people put on, you can be so hindering. And so you're blinded by your significance. You're blinded by the identity that you have in Christ and the purpose and the calling that's within you. And I love what you said is like when we're walking through things and then it's not just sometimes it's like the enemy's like, oh, you're walking through this and it's like trying to label it on, you know? And so you can have victory and go back to those places and encourage those who've been in that same bondage and that same dark place. So maybe that is you today, that what we've been speaking and I don't know if it's a, you know, we've had a double portion of talking about shame for the past two Fridays, but it's important. And God is highlighting this because we have to get set free from this. It is shackling our mind and we don't even realize how much shame does to us that hinders us from walking in the plans and the purposes of God because we put this barricade of words around ourselves. It's like we're doing these like prophesying over ourselves in a negative way of I'm this and I'm that. And that's why things start manifesting over and over again. So today, take authority and be like, you know what God, this is what you say about me and I'm going to declare it over myself and I'm telling you something happens. You start to create things saying things who you are, the devil back up. I mean, we know the Bible tells us that life and death are in the power of the tongue. So it is time like Sidney said to just start declaring out of your mouth who God says you are and that Jesus died to make you free. This scripture that we're focusing on today from Hebrews, the beginning, the verse that comes right before our focus one says to throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And so just ask yourself like what is hindering you? What is weighing your heart down, weighing your mind down that Jesus wants to lift off of you? Like this says to throw it off of you and run with perseverance, the race marked out for you. Do you know that before you were born, Jesus had a race, a life of purpose marked out for you that he is cheering you on. Like there's all these people that have gone before us and they're in heaven and they're like cheering us on saying you will make it through. And you know how you make it through? That same scripture says by fixing your eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of your faith. So as you fix your eyes on Jesus, as you let your faith rise up and activate your faith, then you will be able to run with perseverance. And then the scripture says that Jesus for the joy set before him endured the cross. What was the joy? What joy did he have his eyes fixed on? Well friend, that's you, that's me. Like he was so focused on you when he went to that cross that he endured the cross, scored at shame and now he sits down at the right hand of the throne of God. So consider Jesus and all the opposition that he endured from all of these sinners and yet he died for them to set them free. He died for you to set you free. And if you have never accepted Jesus as your Lord and Savior today is your day to bring some transformation, to bring the lover of your soul into your life. We always have prayer partners here available 24 seven. So if you're watching this in the middle of the night, you can call at 888-665-4483. And somebody will pray with you. They will hear your story, what you've been carrying and they will tell you how to start your own relationship with Jesus. You know, I think there's a lot of people watching right now that you are in a season that as I think about, I think it's first Corinthians, I wanna say it's chapter 16, verse number, I said a great and effectual door has opened up unto me and with it are many adversaries. Shame is one of the big battles you have to break off. If you think about it, what makes something valuable is how rare it is. The Bible talks about how before the children of Israel went into bondage that the Egyptians knew how great they were. And they said, come, let us deal wisely with them less when war breaketh out. They side with our enemies and overtake us and run out of the land. Do you understand how great you are? Do you understand the only reason why you've gone through everything that you have gone through is because the devil said, I've gotta start early. Some of you were abused when you were children. Some of you went through a divorce and didn't understand why and you could never be what your spouse wanted to be and you kept trying to be and measure up and they still left and you're wondering, why am I not enough? You've always been enough. You've always been great. There's always been greatness on your life. The devil planted shame in you from the time you were young, from the time that you were little because you're coming into a season where it's time for yourself to be as you've got to shake off all of the shame. You've got to shake off all of the titles and you've got, as you said, you've got to put your eyes on Jesus, the author and the finisher of your faith. And if you're battling right now, we want you to pick up that phone and dial 888-665-4483 and declare, this is my freedom Friday. I'm shaking off the chains of shame. I'm shaking off the titles and I'm going to walk in the freedom that God asked for me. I feel that so strongly sitting that there's a lot of people out there that have these titles that the devil has planted in their life from the time they were young or whatever they've gone through even when they were an adult. It could be because of color, it because of sex, it could be because of so many different things, but God wants them to shake it off because there's a door that's open for them. Well, when you were, I want to say you were preached and when you were sharing that message, like it reminded me of actually a sermon that Bishop Clay said at Petro International Ministries. They said, are you going to contend or are you going to quit? This is the season that we're in. Are you going to contend or are you going to quit? I'm going to say again, are you going to contend or are you going to quit? Are you going to say, okay, I'm going to go through this, I'm going to stand on this, I'm going to believe in you God, no matter what it looks like or you're just going to go to the wayside, because we all have a decision, we all have a choice that we can make. And I'm just even reminded, I remember Cindy Jacobs, I was at this conference back in September and I'll never forget, she said, there was a word that God put in her spirit, it's Spanish, it's basta, it means enough. Sometimes you have to speak to that situation, say basta, it's enough, I'm done with the shame, I'm done with these lies, I'm done with the words that are going around, you have to say enough is enough. And in this season, I think it's really important that we take authority and knowing, I know who I am. And sometimes I talk to, I'll be in my prayer closet and I will go to bat and be like, I know who I am, get off of my family, get off of my marriage, get off of me, I just start declaring things of the promises that God has said. And I'm telling you, I have seen things shift and shake because I know my authority and who I am in Jesus Christ. Jesus is sitting at the right hand of the Father, like, do we know how good we have it? We are his children, that we can call on Abba Father at any hour, any point of the day, and he responds to us and sometimes it's not in the way that we want it or how fast it is, but he's working on our behalf, he's working all things out for our good. And in this season, no matter what it looks like, you know, sometimes when it gets the darker it gets, the greater the glory is gonna go to God. And sometimes you just gotta stand, sometimes you just gotta say, you know, I doesn't matter what it looks like, though you slay me yet, I will trust you God. That's where we need to be as the body of Christ. When the winds and the waves, when they blow, just say, I trust you God, you fight, but you remind yourself of who you are and I'm telling you, God, he is working and doing a new thing. Well, I know it's like we have like 30 seconds left, final thoughts. Yeah, I just want to encourage you to get into the presence of Jesus, get up next close to his heart because his heart is beating for you today. He wants to comfort you, remind you who you are, encourage you and lift you up so that you can go out and be the person he created you to be. We love you, have a great weekend.