NJ CORRESPONDENTS' DINNER VIDEO 5/7/13. (Transcript Below)
Governor Christie: All right, so what's the deal? I mean, are we going to get this budget deal done or not, you know, because if we get it done, I get to say we budget balanced four years in a row, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Do I get to do that?
Kevin O'Dowd: No I get it. Funny you should ask that because the requests are already rolling in from down the hall. The lists have been flying in.
Governor Christie: Like what? What do they want now?
Kevin O'Dowd: Well, there's the Essex delegation. They've got their list. It seems they want to expand the Turtle Back Zoo again.
Governor Christie: Unbelievable.
Kevin O'Dowd: There's a giraffe on sale from the National Zoo. Apparently it's injured, so we can get a pretty good deal on it. Now I know how much you hate getting press coverage in DC, but this will really help us back home in New Jersey with the animal lover crowd.
Deborah Gramiccioni: Holy shit!
Governor Christie: Wait a second. Are you trying to tell me that buying a giraffe, an injured giraffe, is somehow going to help me politically in New Jersey? Isn't that just going to be another thing that's just going to annoy the base? I don't know. What should I do?
Kevin O'Dowd: Stay focused on New Jersey Guv. This is all about New Jersey.
Governor Christie: All right, you're right, you're right.
Maria Comella: Sir, we have a problem.
Governor Christie: What now?
Maria Comella: The fleece sir. It's missing.
Governor Christie: So what, so what? What's the big deal? You're worrying too much. Stop worrying.
Maria Comella: I don't think you fully understand the implications that this is going to have on your brand.
Governor Christie: Listen, the fleece was so last year. Think about it: I'm back in the Time 100 most influential people in the world. Bruce is my new best friend. I'm friends with Bon Jovi and now I'm back on Morning Joe. You know, that's going to be a love fest, so everything will be right back on track. Stop worrying so much.
Mika Brzezinski: God.
Joe Scarborough: How many pictures do you have on that thing?
Mika Brzezinski: I have so many pictures.
Governor Christie: Hey, did you get my text about going to see Bruce?
Mika Brzezinski: Oh hey.
Joe Scarborough: Didn't we just have him last week?
Mika Brzezinski: I thought he was on last week but I guess he's back. How are you Governor?
Governor Christie: Great. Next week at your book signing, you need me to come?
Mika Brzezinski: No, we're good, thank you.
Joe Scarborough: God, the guy keeps interrupting us.
Mika Brzezinski: It's unbelievable.
Joe Scarborough: Hey, welcome back to Morning Joe. It's been called the greatest collapse in modern American history. Of course we can only be talking about one man, Governor Chris Christie, a man who had the Midas touch. Poll numbers are plummeting, just an absolute collapse.
Mika Brzezinski: I can't find any good news.
Joe Scarborough: I see nothing good at all.
Mika Brzezinski: What's the deal there?
Joe Scarborough: What's up? What's happening?
Security: Excuse me sir. This entrance is for friends and family only. I'm going to need your name.
Governor Christie: I'm Chris Christie. I'm the Governor of New Jersey.
Security: Chris Christie, Chris Christie. I'm sorry. You're not on the list. I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
Governor Christie: I'm Bruce's friend. He told me we were friends. He whispered it in my ear. He's hugging me. He told me we were friends and—
Governor Christie: No, no, no. And we're friends. He told me.
Security: That's great. Mr. Springsteen handed me this list himself. If you're not on this list, you're not his friend.
Governor Christie: Look here, it's a picture of me and Bruce. Look, we're together. I'm that guy right there. It's me.
Security: That's Bruce all right, and that's you in the fleece?
Governor Christie: Yes, yes!
Security: I don't know. This guy looks like a leader. I'm sorry sir. I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
Governor Christie: Come on. You're not going to let me in? I'm not going to get in?
Ma'am, I'm from the Governor's Office. Oh, so this is where you work.
Lieutenant Governor Guadagno: Yes.
Anyway, I'm sorry to disturb you. I know how busy you clearly are, but—
Lieutenant Governor Guadagno: Very busy.
We're going to need you to clear your schedule for today.
Lieutenant Governor Guadagno: Well let me check because I think I'm very busy today. Melissa, how's my schedule look today?...