 Item number SCP-285 Object Class Euclid Special Containment Procedures SCP-285 is to be kept in a level 3 humanoid containment chamber on Site 43's B-Wing. SCP-285 is to be given basic amenities. Following SCP-285's recent cooperation with the Foundation, SCP-285 has allowed exactly two hours of free-roaming Site 43's botanical gardens, with supervision by at least one guard if it so chooses. Personnel are not to discuss SCP-285's past with POI-6938 without approval of Site 43's director. If this occurs, authorized technical staff are to manually remove the information from SCP-285-B via use of SCP-285-A. SCP-285-B instances are not to be edited without the permission of the administrator of Site 43's technical staff. SCP-285 is to never be given its full abilities back under any circumstances. Description SCP-285 is an anomalous humanoid entity with no defined shape or internal structure, the exception being SCP-285-A, which consistently manifests itself on the object's back. SCP-285's body changes sporadically, with no pattern among the alterations. Despite the trauma SCP-285 incurs as a result of this bodily mutation, it will not at any point display signs of homeostatic distress. Subject claims it cannot control these changes. These changes include, but are not limited to, loss in growth of new limbs, variable size and shape of body parts, loss in growth of height and mass. SCP-285-A appears to be an Ethernet port, which allows access to SCP-285's internal database. When accessed by a computer capable of wired connections between networks, various files are capable of being accessed. These files, SCP-285-B, contain various text files, audio files, cognitive hazards, and videos. 90% of all files have been corrupted. The cause of this corruption is currently unknown. Additionally, SCP-285 is only capable of accessing files that were formed within its own database. Investigations into SCP-285-B and its contents reveal that editing of SCP-285-B could cause external changes on SCP-285's body and psychological state. To what extent this is possible without causing permanent damage to SCP-285 is currently unknown. It is believed that POI-6938 used this ability to evade GOI-102, unusual incidence unit, through consistent use of editing SCP-285's facial structure and body type, along with editing and thomacological-based offense capabilities to defend against GOI-102 agents. Recovery SCP-285 was recovered following an attempted arrest involving itself and an unknown individual, currently believed to be SCP-285's creator in Las Vegas, Nevada. SCP-285 and the unknown individual, POI-6938, were initially pulled over for speeding before the officer discovered that POI-6938 had attacked a federal building in California. This federal building was later revealed to have been under the direct control of GOI-102 and was used as a prison for anomalous humanoids. The attack by POI-6938 and SCP-285 ended in the deaths of 34 GOI-102 personnel and the release of roughly 70% of the prison population. The officer attempted to arrest SCP-285 in POI-6938, but was attacked by SCP-285. POI-6938 then escaped, leaving SCP-285 with the officer. SCP-285 was then arrested and put into GOI-102 custody before eventually being given over to the foundation, following an anomalous trade of information between GOI-102 and the foundation. Both local law enforcement and federal agents were unable to locate POI-6938. Anomalous pathways located in Nevada are currently being investigated with joint foundation UIU task forces. Interview Log Interviewer Dr. Henderson Subject SCP-285 Begin Log Dr. Henderson What is your purpose? SCP-285 I don't know Dr. Henderson How do you not know? SCP-285 I just don't know. I have an idea of why it was created, but I'm not too sure. Dr. Henderson Well, tell me why you think you were created. SCP-285 Well, to entertain kids. Originally, I think. Although, my purpose was probably altered for lack of a better word. Dr. Henderson How do you think you were altered? SCP-285 It's hard to explain. I remember some things perfectly, but others I can't even think of. I think he was mad and he wanted to hurt someone. And he used me to help hurt them. I hope he didn't succeed. Dr. Henderson Why do you not want him to succeed? SCP-285 I don't want to hurt anyone. Dr. Henderson Then why did you attack that officer? SCP-285 pauses. SCP-285 I just did as I was told. But I think that's the only time he ever made me hurt someone. At least, I think he did. Dr. Henderson Why do you think your creator put these various files onto you? SCP-285 Insurance, I guess. Dr. Henderson Explain. SCP-285 You see, I remember my, uh, database for lack of a better word. Being biological in nature. My brain taps forehead. Contains all the information in my database. Even if I can't access anything he put on me. Or anything he didn't want me to see. Dr. Henderson So, if your brain were to be damaged, or if you were to die. All the files within your database would disappear. SCP-285 Not disappear as much as just become corrupted. But, yes, that's the idea. He wanted to make sure that if I was to get captured by the UIU or whatever it was called. That they wouldn't have been able to read my files. He really hated those guys. Maybe that's what made him mad in the first place. I remember whenever I brought it up, he'd get angry. And yell at me a lot. I cried a little. Not a lot. He hates when I cry. It's not my fault that he created me to cry. Dr. Henderson Did he bring anything up that would maybe have explained why he was so angry? SCP-285 No. But the way he sounded, it was like the end of the world to him. That's why he created me, I think. Why he altered me. He wanted to use me as something, as a weapon, I guess. Whatever it was, he wanted to hurt the UIU. He used to go on and on about how they were evil and deserved to be destroyed because they took everything from him and how they all need to die. It was scary. Dr. Henderson Well, the UIU is not evil. I can say that with confidence. SCP-285 How, though? He told me they kidnapped and murdered innocent people who'd done nothing but exist. Told me how they made being alive hell for him and his friends and family. I've never had a family, but that must hurt, right? Dr. Henderson Whatever your creator told you, it was inaccurate to reality. SCP-285 If you say so, Dr. I trust you more than him, anyways. Dr. Henderson Why do you think your creator left you behind? SCP-285 He was done with me. Dr. Henderson How was he done with you? SCP-285 He had done what he wanted to do, whatever it was. I guess I was just one more loose end. Dr. Henderson If you truly were a loose end, as you described, why did he not kill you himself? SCP-285 I think he was, and after uploading all the files into my database, he was gonna do that. But he got interrupted, and he panicked, and he had just hoped that the cop would just finish me off. Glad he didn't do that, you know? I like living, better than whatever I was before. Dr. Henderson Why do you think you wanted to get rid of all the files in your database? SCP-285 Something was there, something about some other people. He did something to them. Stole something real important to them. I think he was a part of them at one point, but left. Maybe I was a part of them too, I don't know. But I know that whatever group it was, he didn't want them coming after him. Or finding me. Dr. Henderson Do you remember the name of this group? SCP-285 I don't know, man. I remember him talking about some f***ing stoners, but that's pretty much it. End log Addendum 285.1 The following collection of documents are filed in chronological order based off of documents from SCP-285's internal database and GOI-102 related documents. The purpose of this collection is to provide a possible time frame regarding SCP-285's creation and POI-698's overall motive and goal. Document A The following document was a deleted audio file, believed to be addressed as SCP-285's original owners. Data corrupted. I don't give a damn what Blunt thinks or says. I need him. Without him, I wouldn't have gotten this far. The damn feds are crawling all over the damn place. And this guy is the only thing keeping them away from me. If anything, you should be glad he's around. Better for them to be mined to oblivion than just killed, right? Man, you really gave this guy some sweet powers. You sure this guy was meant to be a kitty thing? I thought we were meant to be pacifists or something. Not that I'm complaining. You know, that's the one thing I've always hated about you two. You're too damn soft. You don't ever fight back. You just sit on your ass and make jokes and do nothing. Yeah, it was fun what we did. For a while at any rate. Then Jordan got taken. You two wouldn't understand what it's like to have to take care of someone. Look after someone. Do some real shitty things to protect the ones that you love. Data corrupted. And every damn time I tried asking you and the others about what we should do about Jordan. About how the Ravens took it. Remember what you fucking said, Jude. He got what he deserved? Well, I remember that. Data corrupted. Maybe we need a couple of terrorists in the world. To knock the man a peg or two down. Data corrupted. Document B. Document currently believed to be in reference to Jordan from Document A. UIU file. 2016-982. Codename. Marrymaker. Summary. Suspect capable of performing high-class thomatology and minor reality warping. Possible connections to the Serpent's Hand. An anomalous terrorist organization. And is primarily active in Southern California and Nevada. Possible member of the secretive location known as the library. The main base of the Serpent's Hand. Name. Unknown. But has consistently given out the first name Jordan. Irregularity cross-reference. Human. Magician. Terrorist. American. Serpent's Hand. Physical description. Note. Subject to consistent changes. Sex. Male. Height. 72 inches. Weight and build. 189 pounds. Large. Race. White. Hair. Brown. Eyes. Blue. Identifying attributes. Tattoos depicting a hand strangling an American eagle. Hammer smashing a five-pointed star. And several hands tugging at a logo. With three arrows pointing inwards. Capabilities. Suspect is capable of performing offensive thomatic spells. These spells include fire-based projectiles. Sentient flesh-based creations formed from his own epidermis. And capable of forming ways. These ways are not permanent and are incredibly unstable. In all cases, ways produced by the suspect are incapable of transporting him at long distances. These ways also cause temporary physical and mental effects to the suspect. Suspect suffers from vomiting and nausea after forming ways. Purpose and motive. Primarily motivated by hatred of organizations or agencies responsible for preserving and maintaining consensus reality. Along with curbing activity in the anomalous community. Believes that the only way anomalous humans can continue to exist is by the destruction of any and all normalcy agencies. Willing to cooperate with any group or person as long as this primary motive is maintained. Modus operandi. Suspect often works with terrorist organizations. Specifically the Serpent's Hand. Various anarchist sects. And, on one occasion, with a currently unidentified anomalous terrorist group. Its cooperation is often in tandem with the organization's opposition to normalcy agencies. Behavior. Behaves with very little remorse or empathy towards non-anomalous entities. Exhibits unwillingness to socialize with other people. Both anomalous and non-anomalous. Document C. The following document was recovered inside of SCP-285's memory files. Originally a video, but only the audio was recovered. Audio begins with the sound of a car driving down a road. A male voice can be heard talking, identified as POI-6938. POI-6938. They're f***ing animals. All of them. They beat us. Abuse us. Make us follow their rules. Which always f***ing put us at a disadvantage. And they expect us not to fight back. It's horrible. SCP-285 does not speak. POI-6938. Well, me and you will show them. We're gonna get Jordan back. And then him and me and you are gonna take this world. Right, Hacks? SCP-285 does not respond. POI-6938. Right, Hacks? SCP-285. Yes, yes, sir. POI-6938. That's more like it. Now get ready. Some feds are up ahead. This place should be where they keep the prisoner lists and s*** it. And hand me that mask. Just cause you don't need one doesn't mean I don't. The car slows down to a halt. With the two car doors opening and slamming closed. Faint talking can be heard. Along with the sound of a door opening and closing. Audio cuts out for 31 minutes. Before beginning once again. Vomiting noises can be heard. As someone is yelling. POI-6938. God f***ing dammit. You f***ed up. Can't you do anything right? SCP-285. Sorry. Alright, I just can't. SCP-285 is cut off by vomiting. POI-6938. Dammit blunt. Why did he have to make you so much of a pansy? SCP-285. Oh god, I can't do this. It hurts. POI-6938. I'd expect so. They made me put that feature in. SCP-285. They? POI-6938. Yeah, the f***ing stoners. Blame them for what's going on. When someone like me or some other person feels bad for killing someone. It's like five times as painful for you. Increased empathy and the like. I would have made you like me, but they just had to be... Vomiting noises begins again. SCP-285. Get it out of me. Help me. Make me a sociopath or something. I can't. I won't do this for the rest of my life. POI-6938. I can't. It's a built-in thing they made me put in you. I'd have to kill you to remove it. Or some better get used to it, Hacks. Thankfully, it wasn't too useless. We got what we needed. Go and get some rest or whatever. SCP-285. Yes, sir. End video. Document D. The following phone call is believed to be between POI-6938 and POI-6939. Jordan. After they'd escaped the correctional facility where Jordan had originally been placed. POI-6938. Hey, dude. You there? Jordan. Yes, I am. What happened? POI-6938. F*** if I know, man. Our, uh, mutual friends did something to Hacks. Jordan. What do you mean did something to it? POI-6938. I can't mess with his files now. Without possibly killing him at any rate. Jordan. And? POI-6938. Which means he's a liability. They know his face. And he doesn't have any of the fancy stuff he used to have. Now he just sorta... changes at random. He's too dangerous. Jordan. What do we do? POI-6938. We, uh, do what we need to. Jordan. Of course. Where will it be? POI-6938. Outside of Vegas. I'll meet you at Salt Lake. Jordan. Alright. Just be careful. Alright? POI-6938. You know I am, brother. Love you. Jordan. Love you too. Addendum 285.2. The following document was discovered inside of a sealed envelope. Addressed to Site 43 staff. Dear janitors slash ravens. I know this type of thing isn't our usual style. But we as a group decided that this situation couldn't be considered normal by any stretch of the imagination. We know you have hacks. And we know what happened to him. Including what happened with Ken and Jordan. And what they planned on doing to him. How we know this is not important. But what is important is what we learned from it. Then we just want to say one thing to everyone involved. We're sorry. We're sorry we trusted a monster who we thought was our friend. We're sorry that we couldn't stop him in time. We're sorry that we couldn't prevent what you went through hacks. I and the rest of the group went to say that we never wanted this to end this way. For hacks. For you janitors. Or for the ravens. Who didn't deserve what happened to them. We just wanted to bring happiness to children with your powers. We just wanted to mock you and the ravens. We didn't mean for this. We never intended for things to end like this. We're so, so sorry. Signed. Gamers against weed. P.S. don't worry about Ken or Jordan. We've dealt with them. Lesson complete. If you missed the previous orientation. Go watch SCP-284. The twins. Right now. Or for the complete course. Watch this playlist.