 Even the meeting calendar invite is like the new first impression when you're setting up a meeting. Did you have an agenda in there? Were you clear on what the purpose was? We all know research shows within the first seven milliseconds we're making a first impression face to face. This is the opportunity to make sure you're upgrading it in a digital world. What's up everybody and welcome to the show today. We drop great content each and every week and we wanna make sure that you guys get notified and in order to do that you're gonna have to smash that subscribe button and hit that notification bell and if you've gotten a lot of value out of this make sure you give us a like and share our videos with your friends. For those in the audience who are starting out who don't have great bosses presenting norms and are completely confused what are your ground rules as we just go through phone communication, texts, Slack and email that you think should be a go-to guide for those of us who are completely confused in this digital landscape. Yeah, so I think let's go through each and every one of them. AJ you said phone, email, Slack and text is that right? Right. So we'll put phone and video together, right? And so the first is just general calls. My general rule of thumb with calls if you wanna set up a call with someone you must have an agenda in advance or a clear purpose send it in advance. Also know when you need a video call otherwise offer a phone call. And we kind of have lost the art of the phone call. It was so amazing. And we kind of now it's an exception not the norm. Not everything needs to be a video call and you have an opportunity to set that norm as well as even if you're on a video call maybe for the first 10 minutes everyone needs to be on video and then you're slide sharing so then you can set a rule you don't need to be on video anymore. This will also avoid a lot of distractions of people worrying about how they look on camera versus actually engaging in the content. Now let's go to Slack. So with Slack I like to say if you use Slack or another like instant messaging tool set some norms within your team around when you email and when you use these tools. If you added Slack you should set a standards that we will no longer email internally about these topics. Everything goes on Slack make it the informal place for internal discussions maybe external discussions or by email or there is a clear cadence otherwise people are using both of them for the same information where people don't know where to go to for what and even in Slack just making sure you're clear on what are the channels what's the purpose of channels to if you want to chat have a separate channel called Watercooler for that to chat so that you can get to work in channels as well and use simple norms whether it's tagging or searchability so people can find information. When it comes to email I like to say in today's world we read email like we read websites have a good subject line like get to the point in the subject line don't have RERERE or no reply, right? And in the email remember to think about the body that have bullet points subject clear bold and underlined headings clarify what you need from the other person within the first two sentences and make sure if you're on the two line it's to people who need to respond if they're on the CC line they just need to read it and hopefully it's better if they don't respond and make that clear unless they have a question and then last but not least text I like to say text is urgent don't be a serial texture for things that aren't urgent maybe within the hour within three hours or maybe with close friends or where there's a high trust relationship so knowing some of these rules and when to use each of these tools will help all of us I like to say a phone call is worth a thousand emails knowing when to switch from a video call to that simple one-on-one exchange can make someone's day and last but not least be thoughtful of not being a serial texture maybe like my dad again who will text me five messages saying call me when it's about how to fix a fax machine and it's not urgent I love all of those and especially the moment of making sure that the subject you're getting to the point your emails are concise make sure what it's about is in the headline I myself with the work that we do at AOC we're looking over newsletters I'm also on and Twitter certainly hones your messaging and I've also know the things that I have on Twitter now go into other communication and it drives me nuts when others are not following that and to even expect them to be adapt to that sort of messaging is that's a day just on my end to expect that but however I'm still accustomed to it within a year we're all gonna be writing in a copy that's right I mean I think in many ways I grew up as an Indian immigrant in the US and I struggled to find my voice and so much of it was learning the cues of traditional body language now we're all immigrants to digital body language but like each channel is different countries with different accents and dialects and we're not gonna be able to learn all the accents and dialects perfectly but what is important is to set some norms so that we can move to clarity not confusion So I know that there are some listeners myself included who have done some faux pas in these different channels going through that rundown I've recognized maybe that wasn't the best way to communicate how do you handle that when you have made a mistake and you have gone outside the norms in a way that doesn't impact your reputation that allows the other person to feel good about that miscommunication because let's be honest as we just talked about it's getting more complex every day miscommunication is gonna happen but I know that's a point of anxiety for many which is leading them to not communicate at all because they don't wanna make a mistake and they don't know how to handle the mistake so if we have stepped in it how do we handle that? So when it comes to making mistakes I like to say in these situations speed matters just as much as substance so taking the time to fix it quickly is important maybe it's a quick follow up thoughtfully or maybe it's opting for a phone call to reduce the miscommunication in a situation maybe it's sleeping on it overnight but not waiting too long and then coming to it with a thoughtful response these are things that can make a big difference in resolving especially mistakes or when you're rushing and you send something where you don't actually answer the question and you don't look good, right? Like this is our presence today this is how we build trust with others it's frankly not eye contact and good physical body language anymore or it's not for a while and so at the end of the day if you take the time to respond quickly also ask yourself is this the right medium to respond and to make sure that you're responding in a way that in the channel that the other person will value not just you, so not just saying oops with a smiley face but calling them and saying I'm sorry I messed that up here's what I'll do met next time will allow others to feel valued in that situation versus you just covering your own insecurity Well you hit the nail on the head this is our new first impression we drop great content each and every week and we wanna make sure that you guys get notified and in order to do that you're gonna have to smash that subscribe button and hit that notification bell and if you've gotten a lot of value out of this make sure you give us a like and share our videos with your friends So many of us are not meeting face to face so having me on a CC instead of a BCC or not including the attachment is the first impression these mistakes being rushed and being on a shot clock and not thinking through thoughtfully in our communication when you're on the receiving end of that especially as a stranger or someone who doesn't have much trust or know you that gets perceived in a very negative way that I don't wanna do business with this person I don't wanna give this person time on a phone call I can't meet this person up in person if that's how they're handling their digital communication and not valuing my time So we have to really be thoughtful in the speed of the communication that we're having because yeah, multitasking, answering that email on phone while stuck in traffic on your way to dinner thoughtlessly not including the emoji or the emotional context with that message as we know from our first impressions in the real world it can be very hard to change someone's first impression of you and if digital communication is that first impression we don't wanna leave the wrong one that's absolutely right another thing even the meeting calendar invite is like the new first impression when you're setting up a meeting did you have an agenda in there where you clear what the purpose was we all know research shows within the first seven milliseconds we're making a first impression face to face this is the opportunity to make sure you're upgrading it in a digital world Absolutely Our last question for you we ask every guest in obviously writing this book and putting together all the research around communication you've recognized the things about yourself strengths and weaknesses and we'd love to know what you consider your X factor or what is that unique skill set and ability that's made you successful not only in your communication but in work I think as a kid navigating different cultures and languages I developed a good observation skill about not what people were saying but what they were really saying being able to read that dynamic in a room and it's allowed me to bring the skills around collaboration to financial executives at Goldman Sachs and Morgan Stanley but it's allowed me to also connect with women of color and communities talking about social injustice but and it's also allowed me to talk to Silicon Valley and tech managers and I think that it all starts by understanding that we have so much more to learn from each other than to antagonize each other it also starts with understanding that we have different not only traditional body language but digital body language styles and that the answer is not connecting in the way that you like to connect but connecting in ways that others like to connect and last but not least I think the final aspect of that X factor is I realize that the best thing I can do is be myself so sometimes that's getting my audiences to Bollywood dance or because I love to Bollywood dance or making everyone laugh by sharing my biggest digital mistakes that I've made these are things that will allow us all to build connection with each other and allow others to be willing to be vulnerable as well. And I think your book is incredibly important because it allows all of us to stop and think about where all of this is heading and making sure that we don't solve problems with the wrong answers for instance I had saw an invention that is a camera that goes on your head so that when you're walking down the street with your phone it will alert you if you're going to walk into anything that is not the type of solutions that we need and I'm old enough to know that my generation sees that and laughs but the younger generation goes, oh that's perfect now I won't trip. This is perfect. You know it's so true Johnny I have another one for you there's actually a new invention where you can put a camera in the middle of your monitor so it can show like you're making eye contact on video calls. So I think that's actually a better upgrade for even some of us that are not that young anymore but I think these new innovations are here to stay. I know you have a digital body language toolkit where can our audience find more about the book and the toolkit if we've realized that we need to improve our digital body language. Yeah so you can find the book at dblbook.com or available everywhere Amazon, Barnes and Noble's Audible. I also have a new course on digital body language it's at dblcourse.com and you can get a special gift for listening today which is a digital body language toolkit on my website at ericadouan.com slash dbl. Thank you so much for joining us Erica. Thank you so much for having me.