 logical topical points that can stem from the thing that she says for example she says I'm from Chicago and your brain oh Chicago and you start thinking like okay Chicago you start trying to do like an association Chicago oh Chicago style hot dogs windy city cubs fan the bears oh like Michigan you know the beach out there wicker park I lived in Chicago for a brief since I've got a little more Chicago ammunition but your brain starts looking for these topical things that the words like reminds you of it's what you do when you're nervous and you're struggling to think of something to say what we like to say to do is paint the picture and what that means is that you basically take whatever she said and you imagine you paint a picture of her doing it of your entire life's past experience involved with your own self doing these things for example I know it's a little abstract for example a girl says I went to Mexico four words so if you're trying to struggle to think of something to say based off those four words you don't have much to go off of you go your mind is racing let's see Mexico beaches I don't know what are some other things what are some other topical things that you think of when you think of Mexico what's that Cabo tequila yeah easy it's way guys think it's the way guys relate to each other topical things oh yeah see that baseball game last night why not reduce nothing wrong with that you want to relate to the woman if you want to talk to her you have to speak personally you have to make it personal you have to start painting the picture so when a girl says to me I went to Mexico I'm painting a picture of her experience and I'm recalling my past life experience with something similar my train of thought is going to go something like this my train of thoughts going to be oh well was this a spur-of-the-moment decision that you made or was it something that you've been planning out for a while did you pack at the last minute like I always do or did you plan your trip a couple months in advance do was your flight delayed like flights happen to be delayed quite a bit now how long was the flight again because I'm not even sure how long that flight to Mexico it's probably pretty rocket you watch the movies on the plane did you just sleep or were you so excited that you couldn't sleep did you have a shot of tequila when you hit international waters when you landed did they lose your luggage or was your luggage actually all there in one piece your girl so you probably overpacked quite a bit didn't you it's what girls do it happens no problem with that you have to look pretty I respect that did they have a mariachi band playing in the airport when you got off and not to be stereotypical but that's the only song I could think of what was your trip like was it were you just laying on the beach the whole time we're going out getting hammered every single night were you trekking through the jungle climbing waterfalls and zip lining and hiking and you know looking at monkeys swinging through trees what type of girl are you discovering old ancient Aztec ruins or maybe a combination of all of them how long were you there for at the end of your trip were you anxious to get back where you homesick retired we just wanted to come back or could you stayed another week did you never want to come back were you thinking about moving there trip back was it alright did you sleep back on the plane when you got back where you were fresh excited to go face the day and face your life or do you need a vacation from your vacation was your favorite part of the trip if you could go back there would you do it exactly the same again or would you change some things painting a picture and here's what the principle is based off of is that you guys all have lived at least what who's the youngest guy here 18 any 18 anyone who's 18 here anyone who's 19 here okay you guys have all lived at least 19 years on this planet 21 tonight but you guys have all lived at least 19 years on this planet you have a wealth of experience to draw from living in our generation and our part of the world in in some part of the world on planet earth and it's logical that her being a human being on this planet in our culture of sorts has had pretty similar experiences growing up as you did I used to love teenage mutant Ninja Turtles and say by the bell when I was growing up chances are there's going to be a lot of girls out there who like the same thing I can take a wild guess so anything she says if I scroll through my back history of experience with it I can probably have at least one thing that she can relate to sometimes I won't sometimes she could say something that I have no experience with I'm completely clueless with and when that happens I now have an awesome opportunity for her to teach me something with genuine curiosity I don't know anything about that you have to tell me all about it you're going to be my resident expert for I don't know whatever she's talking about and if I say something if she whatever she says reminds me of something in my life experience and she's never heard of it before I'm like what how have you never heard of blank are you serious they're the greatest band in the world are you kidding what's wrong with you what planet did you grow up on you tracking through painting the picture going through history you always have something you can connect with and because it's genuine because it came from you actually listening and pausing and thinking and buffering giving yourself some more time to like buffering again maybe she might say something which can bring through another million things that you could possibly think of should never run out of things to say it everything you say will be pertinent will be valuable will make her really light up and excited because very few guys actually do listen it's scary I want to give an example of how great of how universally this can be used and the example I like to use is taking the most boring possible thing that a girl could possibly say to you and show that even with that if you paint a picture you've still got a million that a million things but you still got quite a good many things that you could say and I've heard this one time and time again if there's one thing I've heard that a girl could say that is more blah like she's just saying that she doesn't give two shits it's if I were to say so what are you guys up to tonight I usually like to start with boring interview questions what are you guys up to tonight because girls are expecting it it's the way that people usually communicate it's the way that the man of her dreams that she's always imagined is going to talk to her but the differences instead of every other guy that just goes down the list oh that's cool what do you do oh that's cool um where you from oh that's cool I'm actually going to listen I'm gonna my response to whatever her response be is going to be different than anything she's ever heard before in that situation that's where I get their attention so one of my favorites is so what are you guys up to tonight and the most common boring response that you'll probably ever get is oh we're just hanging out oh we're just chilling not much really just hanging out right could there be a more boring response that a girl could possibly give you to a question probably not so I want to paint the picture with this because I believe that if we take the most boring example and show that there's still a million things you can say that anything that a woman could possibly say you could have a million things to say never running out especially with the pausing buffering pausing that's you have to do that that's unbelievable so we're just hanging out we're just chilling anybody want to shout out something right here when you can think back about you and your friends just hanging out just chilling your own life experience with this thing that she said what it calls to mind what it reminds you of what are some possible things that pop up anybody shout out out at the bar specifically yes I definitely do that with friends but when you're you're out at a bar maybe out at a drinking location with some friends what does that night look like