Senator Jefferson Einstein, Junior Republican from South Dakota, eloquently elaborates on the libertarian views which have helped him surge in the polls -- and that he believes will carry him to victory.
Find out MORE about Junkie Einstein's voting record as the race for President heats up:
On drug legalization: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tBb4cj...
On smoking lettuce: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3eooXN...
On prescription medicine: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Psfn6...
On the existential crisis of not knowing if life is really happening:
On how one can understand the poetry of Congress: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qizNQK...
On the economic benefit of marijuana legalization: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jbc2Na...
When you look on this stage
Under all these bright lights,
You just see some guys
That you don't really like
At all, grow some balls
When you choose tonight!
But if you vote for me
You'll be doin the country
A really, really big favor--trust me, you can thank me later
When I legalize everything
I can guarantee you'll be
Much, much more happy
I can satisfy all your needs
For shady activities
As you please, like
Prostitutes and drugs
Panda skin rugs
Exposin your erections
It's high time
You vote for Einstein
I'll legalize everything
Euthanizin old people
Poachin bald eagles
I'll fire the regulators
Of asbestos toilet paper
It's high time for Einstein
I'll legalize everythiiiiing
If you vote for him
You'll be helpin the nation
- God's favorite nation -
Live like the founding fathers did
And never have to bother with
Laws against anything
He can guarantee you'll be
Much more happy and free
(Ron Paul: constitutionally!)
If you wanna see tyranny's demise
Realized we should legalize
Newt Gingrich: Public urination
Rick Santorum: Without taxation
Mitt Romney: Buying the election
All: Exposin our erections!
You got it!
It's high time you vote for Einstein
Einstein: I'll legalize everything:
Extreme religious sex/sects
If you're wondering how i spelled those
Then you'll just have to guess ...
All: It's high time for Einstein
He'll legalize everythiiiiiing
Einstein: Every single
Smokable, drinkable thiiiiiiing