 We fade into what looks like a warehouse full of rows and rows of furniture, stacked upon tall metal and wooden shelves, stacked higher than one could see the top of from standing at ground level. The merchandise on these shelves remains well stocked, and the support struts that are laced around the warehouse area are very large. They are very thick. They are also unyielding and thrust very high up towards the ceiling. The ceiling is so high that clusters of moisture are able to form up there, and the warehouse area seems to have its own weathered patterns, but it still remains comfortably cool. It is evening, and a red dull light blankets the warehouse area, and we can see that it is extremely large, seemingly infinite. This is the Infinite Ikea. The red lights that sit high upon the support struts number each of these massive concrete pillars, and we shift our focus up to one of these pillars. We see its number, it is 34, and it illuminates a small encampment of Ikea tribespeople. This is the home, or rather former home, of the Canopy tribe. One sole member remains. He is left tied, shamed, and abandoned by his tribe, and by the one he loved. He is Stanley, the last of the Canopy tribe. Stanley had killed their newest tribesperson, Thorn, who had somehow resurrected and now was leading the only family that he had known since coming to the Infinite Ikea, off to return to the land beyond the parking lot. Stanley knew in his heart that Thorn was a monster, and that Thorn was about to lead them to their ruin. They would never be able to return to the land beyond the parking lot. He could do nothing but watch as the only family that he has ever known since arriving here in this forsaken land was led to their doom by the demon Thorn. No doubt Stanley's inner monologue right now would be incredibly depressing. So I only know a little bit of canonical stuff about Stanley from our little talk to me in Bong, but like what I'm going off of is just kind of from what I picked up in my own making the character in my mind to convey him voice as well as just a little fun D&D character building. So let me tell you a little bit about Bert. Okay, we're getting the true name, huh? Yeah, Bert is a single child. Only child, there we go. Bert was an only child. And while he did get pampered and spoiled like any single, there we go again, only child does. He still was constantly trying to find ways to get his parents' attention or approval. And while it was there, it was still something that he fought for. And so because of that he would take up interests and throw himself at it. And then once it stopped getting his parents' praise that like kind of that honeymoon phase of like, wow, you're picking this up so quickly. And then after it was like, oh yeah, like now you're kind of in that journeyman phase of you're just trying to get better. And he stopped getting constant praise. He would drop it. And so because of that he picked up a bunch of different hobbies. He picked up martial arts. He picked up, he went into the Boy Scouts. He tried picking up pottery and even did dance and everything. But after it would stop getting his parents' praise and just kind of became a chore for them to take it to him. Or they complained about paying the bills. He would drop it. So he basically became this jack of all trades. But also because of that he never really held on to a hobby and he never held on to a group of friends. So he was always fighting from group to group, never really had anyone he got very close with. So growing up, Bert didn't have a whole lot of friends and would also get picked on. This kind of started going into this non-trusting looking for approval mentality in his head that is still with him as he is now Stanley. At one point after high school, before graduation, Bert suddenly found himself inside the Ikea. Wandering around, he was able to at least use some of the skills he had picked up to make himself, you know, able to live in the situation. He was able to use some of his Boy Scouting skills to like make fires or like a little bit of first aid. And his, you know, martial art training by all means wasn't making him combat ready, but he at least knew how to throw a punch and, you know, throw a kick and had a little bit of toughness to his body. And as he started to kind of go about on his own, he had one evening where things went south. And he found himself fighting with another person in the Ikea and being an untrusting person, the two of them ended up getting into a fight in a quarrel, which ended up with Stanley on the ground, passed out from a loss of blood, and a Stanley knife embedded into his chest. Cut to him waking up and being found by the Canopy Tribe, where their tradition is you are named by what you were found with stuck in you or stuck under or whatever have you, and Burt was found with a Stanley knife embedded into his chest. So he became known as Stanley. Stanley tried to find his way of becoming important to the tribe in any way he could. And being a jack of all trades, he was at least able to start showing himself as being a decent warrior, a good hunter, a good trapper. But as he was there longer, it started to become apparent that he wasn't great at these things, just okay at a lot of things. He couldn't really teach. He just kind of knew some of these skills. And so he initially started off as being a big hit in the Canopy Tribe and getting a lot of people's attention. But then very quickly, it was found him to be a prick and quite shallow. And while he kept searching for approval and chasing after this approval, he didn't really have the means to do so. And then after a few years, he did train himself and he became a capable warrior and became a much more tougher person, as we will see in his stats and in the game, that he has a high toughness and he's decent at combat, as being in a warrior class inside the endless Ikea doesn't really allow you to be soft. But then after a few years, Thorn came to the Canopy Tribe and the entire Canopy Tribe and especially Stanley's life changed forever. As we've seen in the confinement episode, but for those who have not seen it, Thorn was from the outside, from specifically from the foundation as kind of a test dummy to check things out inside. And something unlocked in Thorn and known as Connor, but it's not his story, it's Stanley's story. So Connor had something, fuck Connor, he's not a character in this. We couldn't get Lord Boeing at that seal and reason, kidding, no. It would have been fun, but also Connor's story is being told in the whole awesome animations. We don't need more Connor. So Connor, aka Thorn, kicked ass in the tribe and got a lot of people's attention. He had something unlocked in his mind where this warrior spirit was able to come out and blew everybody away. Stanley tried to keep up and still would go on missions but would not be nearly as flashy or as impressive as Connor, again, aka Thorn, until eventually Thorn was called back to the foundation and the only way to do so was using Connor's ability to basically die and come back. And he and the rest of his tribe did not know that that was the plan and everyone else went with Connor back to the real world and unbeknownst to Stanley died. As he assumed they were gone anyways and probably would die or at least at the very least had left him behind, he became a loner once again. Stanley is a younger man, probably in his late 20s at this point, though time is kind of hard to read in the Endless Ikea. He does know that he was past his 20s or past the age of 20 when he came to the Infinite Ikea. Since being faked by the canopy tribe, Stanley got his very first tattoos, a tradition amongst the canopy tribe of a series of lines and arrows and dots about his body similar to what you would see in instructions on Ikea furniture. For the most part, Stanley is kind of plain looking. He kind of has never had anything as stood out amongst the crowd as much as he has tried to with this swooping hairstyle with his blonde hair. For the most part it's short on the sides and a long sweep on the top of his head that sweeps to his right side. His eyes are brown in color and his face is kind of plain coming to a pointed chin and he stands about five foot six. Again, his only real discerning marks being the tattoos across him and the Stanley knife sword at his waist. Stanley, as you sit atop the canopy tribes encampment, you are bound and feeling very defeated at the fact that your tribe has now been carted off in the direction of where you originally came upon Thorn after he was found with a piece of wood stuck into his head and how he gained the name Thorn. As you sit here, you hear some pillowy soft footsteps approaching behind you. You know that through a long time of having to deal with your rival tribe, the pillow pilferers who dressed themselves in well padded pillowing to protect themselves from any sort of attack, you know that they are sneaking upon you now and you are able to turn your head to see that two of them have now come upon you here. Ah, we have finally defeated you canopy tribe. Submit to our comfortable victory and meet your uncomfortable doom. Having just watched his found family, his entire tribe and the love of his life seemingly jumped to their death and leave him behind tied up to die. Stanley just lays there and with all the taunting and the soft steps of his known rival tribe approaching, Stanley just lets out a defeated sigh and just says just do it. I have nothing left. Dude, this isn't how it's supposed to be. Smother me. I know you have the tools. It's more fun when you fight us, but this doesn't. Are you okay with this? He turns to his buddy that's there just sort of shrugs. Okay, we will claim our victory over that. Where is everyone else? They're all gone. Every last one of them left me behind. I have nothing left. Take what you want. This is sort of just sad. I feel I feel weird about this. Where did where did they go? They jumped off. He said they're in the land beyond the parking lot now. Oh, let me follow them. Untie me. He seems he seems dangerous. He has a knife. Let's just push him off, push him off, push him off. It's kind of my thing. Our thing is pillows. I know. I just wanted to add that line and I love that. That's kind of our thing. You're going to love this next part then. So they take you off to the side of the canopy tribes like hut thing that's up top there. While you are still tied up, prepare to push you off. As you are standing at the edge here, you see a trail looks like a cart that was pushed off into the distance in the direction that you now see a flare originating from. As these two are about to push you off, they say, oh, it seems like our people found someone. I feel like we would only do that if it was the canopy tribe, but whatever, push them off. So you are now pushed off of the canopy tribe, falling faster and faster. And as you fall, the pillow pilferers who had pushed you off didn't realize that they had pushed you off directly onto their pile of pillows that they had left on the bottom for their speedy escape. And as you land down here, you are able to see the spot where the canopy tribe would have landed had they landed and met their demise here. And you just see two squashed bodies, but both of them belong to Thorn. And you see a slightly bloody trail of cart tracks it looks like leading off in the direction that you now see the flare has reached its apex. You get the impression that your family may still be alive, and if a flare was shot off, the Ikea employees may be now upon them. This could be your one chance at redemption. But I'm still tied up. Your knife is still on you. You can move your arms a little bit. Why don't you act under pressure for me? Sure. So go ahead and roll 2d6. That is a three. A three total? Yeah. Yeah, and you're for act under pressure, you add cool to the roll and you're is zero is zero. So if you wanted to, the way we are handling luck for this campaign is every person gets one. So if you wanted to use that, I feel like if Oh, okay. I feel like if something was within Stanley that he could pull out of him to overcome some great situation. This would be a time when he would perceive that he needs to. But it's ultimately up to you if you want to try to save that or try to use it now. All right. Oh, man. This is a big moment in which Stanley would probably you Stanley would use his luck point right now because if it's a chance to get to save his tribe, he would totally fucking do it. But like Kyle doesn't want to use his luck point on sessions. But it's Stanley. It's not my choice. All right. Let's go. Rerolling. That is a seven. So luck. If you spend if you spend a luck point, it turns your role from whatever you rolled into a complete success. So you don't actually. Oh, okay. Great. Yeah. So you succeed. You are able to wriggle your body to work the Stanley knife that has been placed at your hip to extend out and you're able to slowly chop away at the. Let's say it was probably some torn linens that were used to bind your hands and feet. Yeah. So you're able to free yourself and you see that the flair is now falling downward. You can see generally where you need to go, but you aren't able to see what's going on there just yet. You begin to move quickly in that direction, trying desperately to find and save the only family you've ever known since coming to the infinite Ikea. And we can go ahead and end the session there.