 Conservatives once thought that they won the war on Christmas. We're saying Merry Christmas again. People are actually saying Merry Christmas. You can say Merry Christmas again. Isn't that so nice, Janine? I love it. If only they knew what the future had in store. It started in 2021, when President Joe Biden signed an executive order immediately after taking office, banning the celebration of Christmas entirely. Patriots at Fox News and Newsmax condemned his executive order and sought for what it was an attack on Christianity. That means no Christmas even church. That means no Christmas morning under the tree with your family tearing through stockings. It means no Christmas at all. And for a while, things didn't look too good. Conservatives had to come up with covert methods of celebrating Christmas using code words to say Merry Christmas. But Crackers joined the LGBTQ wing of the Antifa military. The Grinch left Whoville and became an Instagram thought. Although I must say, he did look pretty good. And Chris Kringle, he left the North Pole and Mrs. Claus and he became a full-blown homosexual. Mrs. Claus eventually remarried and her new husband basically became the new de facto Santa Claus, but he was black. And even though Christmas was canceled at this point, intellectuals debated about whether or not this hurt the chances of Christmas ever returning one day with the future Trump presidency. I just don't know why it's necessary. I don't understand why people feel they need a black Santa Claus. But when it seemed like all hope was lost, then came the resistance. A patriotic duo teamed up to record the first Christmas song since the ban on Christmas and a shot to the top of the charts on iTunes, even beating out Adele. Little did they know, that one song catalyzed an entire movement. In a showing of courageous disobedience, Fox News put up the biggest, most prettiest tree anyone ever saw. More patriots started to put up Christmas trees themselves. It felt like we were getting the country back. It felt like Christmas again, until disaster hit. It's beginning to look a lot like arson. Right now there is somebody who is in custody and is being interviewed by local police. Who sets a Christmas tree on fire? That big, beautiful Fox News Christmas tree, an icon for the movement, was burned to the ground. Some even compared it to Pearl Harbor. This wasn't just about that tree. This was about us. It was an attack on Christianity. The Christmas trees is an attack on Christianity, obviously. So-called allies in the fight to bring back Christmas were too afraid to condemn the attack on Christians. The mayor of New York City held a press conference yesterday and did not mention the burning of the Fox Christmas tree. Of course not. Didn't even mention it. But this attack meant to crush the spirits of pro-Christmas patriots, only fire them up more. No one can burn down the spirit of Christmas or destroy our resilience. A new tree is on the way. It will be brighter and more beautiful than ever. Patriots began again, putting up trees, but this time they were armed and ready to protect those trees from these terrorists. After police departments were defunded, cops didn't have the resources or the desire to enforce these bans on Christmas, which is when the Biden administration deployed a new, familiar strategy, psychological warfare. The White House sent out their secret weapon, Dr. Anthony Fauci. And what did he do? Well, he tried to scare people into not wanting to celebrate, but the Patriots saw right through it. Dr. Anthony Fauci is already trying to cancel Christmas. Appearing on Face the Nation, he let his inner-scrooge out. But we can gather for Christmas or it's just too soon to tell. You know, Margaret, it's just too soon to tell. And at that point, through sheer force of will, Patriots brought Christmas back. Governors across the country started signing laws, re-declaring Christmas a national holiday, setting off a lengthy legal battle that lasted years and made it all the way to the Supreme Court. Then we won. In a 6-3 majority decision, the Supreme Court ruled that celebrators of Christmas were a protected minority, and in that same ruling, they made the celebration of Christmas mandatory for everyone. Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. I love that you say that. And we're going to be saying Merry Christmas at every store. Democrats across the country were outraged, but I'm sure you expected that. Even the White House was forced to celebrate Christmas again, but of course, they did the bare minimum to comply with the law, putting up the ugliest Christmas tree and Christmas decorations they could pile together, but you know, we didn't really care. I love Christmas decorations, but this looks a little like a carnival cruise. Then, in 2024, when Donald Trump won back the White House, lucky for us, he also held a narrow majority in the U.S. Senate, where Senators Joe Manchin and Kirsten Sinema led the charge in drafting a constitutional amendment, mandating the celebration of Christmas every single year going forward. And at that point, it was clear the war on Christmas was over. And if you're wondering how I know about all of this, well, because I've seen it. That's right. It's me, Mike from the Future. And I know you've probably got a lot of questions about what happened in the future, what happened after Donald Trump became president for a second time in 2024, and I can't tell you anything because I don't want to risk ripping a hole in this space-time continuum. This technology, to go back in time, was just invented, and I'm not going to play any stupid games, but what I will leave you with is this. Since it is the month of December, I am legally obligated to wish you and your family a very merry Christmas from my wife, Lily, and I. May the Lord Jesus Christ bless you during this holy time. Again, merry Christmas.