 If you pretend or if you cheat, you're never going to grow. And by the way, this is inspired by 15th century philosopher from China named Wang Yang Ming. I've written some academic articles on, this is the most famous neo-confucian philosopher, arguably. And he had a doctrine called the unity of knowledge and action, where he taught that, and this is applied to moral theory, moral life, that if you don't apply what you learn, if you don't apply your knowledge, if you don't act on it, then you don't really know it. It's just theoretical knowledge. For instance, you could theoretically know that height is not an issue, but if when push comes to shove, you don't follow through on that, you don't have the right mindset to back it up, you don't really know it. That was his theory, real knowledge. You need to acquire real knowledge. And the way to get there, just like he says, actually Wang Yang Ming, there's a cyclical process of continuing to try. For instance, the examples he used were for moral philosophy. Let's say you know that you ought to try to save a drowning child in the river. You know that theoretically. I ought to risk my life to save this drowning child, this innocent child. But then let's say you confronted with it. So that was an example, like this drowning child, but you freeze. You don't want to risk your life now, then you don't really know that moral principle. And the same applies in dating. To really know where that wall is, you have to tune into your own instincts. You know when there's that off feeling, like, oh, that little tug in your conscience or that feeling where you're not totally comfortable now. Pay attention to that. Don't hide it. You need to develop emotional awareness of yourself. Real power comes from self-knowledge, emotional intelligence. That's how the change in transformation occurs. So pay attention to those little tugs in your heart. It's like, oh, that hit me. That little shit test got me. Or she's walking away and talking to some other guy now. I thought she was mine. Oh, that hurts. Pay attention to all of that because that's the content that you're going to use for your verbal material. And that's what will help you to grow. That's where your weakness is. That's where your wall is. That's where the edge of your comfort zone is.