 Hi, this is Helena Hart from commitmentconnection.com and in this video I wanted to answer a question I received from someone in our community who wants to know how to behave after sleeping with a guy in a way that will bring him close and attract him into a committed relationship rather than cause him to act distant or pull away. I know I get questions like this all the time from women, so hopefully this will be helpful for you. But before I get started, if you're looking to attract a man and create an amazing relationship with him or if you're in a relationship and you want to strengthen the connection and bond and bring your man closer than ever before, be sure to click the button to subscribe to our YouTube channel to stay up to date on all of our latest videos. So to answer this question, how to behave after sleeping with a guy? The first thing I want to mention is that of course there's this stereotype out there, especially among men that women can tend to get clingy or expect a committed relationship immediately after sex or after the first time she sleeps with a man. And of course that can be true and men can be that way as well. I mean there's always exceptions to the rule, but in general, you know, men can sort of be afraid that after they sleep with a woman she's going to turn into someone who's really needy or clingy or wants to spend every minute with him or expects him to jump into an exclusive committed relationship with her right away, even if that wasn't the agreement or if they haven't talked about it yet. There are all different kinds of scenarios here. So you really want to get in touch with what is it that you need in order to feel good about sleeping with a guy? Most women, you know, can't sleep with a man without some sort of exclusivity in place, whether it's an exclusive relationship or at least sexual exclusivity where you know the man isn't pursuing other women sexually or, you know, even for dating or for a relationship. So what is it that you need to have in place before you feel comfortable sleeping with a man? And ideally you'd want to have this conversation with him before the two of you have sex, you know, something like, you know, I love being with you. It feels so good dating you and getting to know you. And I'm really looking forward to, you know, taking that next step. But, you know, for me, that's, you know, I only feel comfortable sleeping with a man if I'm in an exclusive relationship with him or if we're sexually exclusive or whatever it is that you have as a boundary. Ideally, you'd want to have that conversation before you sleep with him. But I know that, you know, sex happens all the time before that conversation in dating a lot, you know, sometimes you just get carried away or get caught up in the moment and you might sleep with a guy before talking about what that means to you or what that means for the potential relationship. So if that happens, don't beat yourself up. It happens all the time and just know that you can have that conversation before the second time you sleep with him. So something along the lines of, you know, it felt so good getting close to you the other night. I'm really looking forward to that happening again. You know, just something that, you know, I want to make sure we're on the same page with is that I only feel comfortable, you know, having sex with someone within the context of an exclusive relationship or whatever that is to you. So that's what you can say before the next time you sleep with him. So there are all different versions of this. You just want to really get in touch with what's important to you. What do you need to have in place in order to feel comfortable and feel good about the fact that, you know, the two of you are now sleeping together. So in terms of how to behave after you sleep with a guy for the first time, what you don't want to do is, you know, play into that stereotype. You don't want to just get super clingy and needy. You want to keep your life outside of him. If you have plans the next day, I would absolutely, you know, go for it. Don't hang around and, you know, expect him to spend the whole next day with you. If you can leave first, you know, if you're at his place, if you can be the first one to initiate leaving and starting your day on your own, that's fantastic. And it's not a game and it's not a strategy. It's just, you want to convey to him that you're not going to change into this different person who has all of these expectations and needs all of a sudden that you didn't have before the two of you slept together. So I would, you know, be the first one to kind of leave the situation, let him know that you had a great time. It felt amazing and just sort of accept that it happened and now it's over. And now you're going to go do your own thing. And then he's going to pursue you and see you again. And if he's the right man for you, he will absolutely want to see you again. And what you want to do moving forward when if you continue to date him is let him know, not by telling him about it, but just let him know through your body language and your behavior and just your energy and vibe that shared emotional experiences lead to more sexual attention. So basically the idea here is that you're not just giving away sex for free because you like a guy or you have strong feelings for him or you're all chemically bonded to him now because maybe the sex was really good and you're feeling super attracted to him. You don't want to just, you know, slip into this thing where you just meet up and have sex. It's kind of like a friends with benefits thing. If you want to date him or if you want to be in a real relationship with him, you really need to sort of teach him with your, you know, what you accept from him and your behavior and actions that I'll say it again, shared emotional experiences lead to more sexual attention. So, you know, don't just run over to his house every time he snaps his fingers, right? You want to keep that full life, stay busy, have fun. And again, this can't be a game. And you can't pretend this. It has to be authentic. So I hope that was helpful for you in terms of how to behave after sleeping with a guy. You just want to authentically keep your life outside of him and the relationship or potential relationship and just be really warm and open and receptive to him when he shows up and asked you out again and just sort of let him know what you need to have in place if you're going to continue sleeping with him. Ideally, again, you'd have that conversation before you had sex. But if you slept with him before talking about it, it's perfectly fine. Don't beat yourself up. You can always have that conversation before it happens again. So I hope that was helpful for you. I would love to hear your thoughts and experience with this. Type those into the comment section and I will see you next time. Thanks for watching. And if you'd like to discover exactly what to say and do to get the man and relationship you've always wanted, click the button on the right side of this video to visit our website and I will talk to you soon.