 I'm going to do a Trump on you, mask off, COVID on. My name is Sam Vaknim, not Donald Trump. I'm the author of Malignant Self-Love, Narcissism Revisited, and a few other books, any books about personality disorders and also Professor of Psychology, believe it or not, in several universities around this shrinking globe. And today, again, we have quite a few things to ponder, and I hope they are as provocative as usual. And as is our habit, we start by tackling reader-viewers' questions. And at some point, hopefully one of these days, we will get to the topic of today's video, and the topic is contempt. How the narcissist is contemptuous, how he finds you contemptible, and how the psychopath takes advantage of this mutual self-assured destruction to celebrate and to get the better out of both groups of people, narcissists and their victims. But before we get to this delectable cuisine of contempt and seething rage and modification and injury, in other words, the day-to-day life of a narcissist, before we get to all this, let us tackle a few questions posed by our highly intelligent, amazingly insightful viewers. So let's start with the first one. What do you think about combined narcissism and perverse narcissism? Combined narcissism is a term totally unnecessarily invented by Dutch psychiatrists who felt left out of the game and their grandiosity compromised by the indisputable fact that Europe is a decade behind the United States in understanding narcissism. So they felt left out, and they came up with this utterly meaningless and nonsensical term combined narcissism. They even got this term introduced into Dutch language textbooks. Similarly, French psychologists and psychiatrists who are very good with words, they love words. French generally, French intellectuals, they're in love with words. For them words, language is a kind of music. And then they fall in love, they get infatuated with their own flow of words to the point of compromising, undermining, sabotaging and ignoring any meaningful communication. So they came up French psychologists and psychiatrists who again felt left out by their Western colleagues, much more advanced Western colleagues. They came up with the term perverse narcissism, which is even more idiotic than combined narcissism, because which narcissism is not perverse. And the term perversion has undertones and overtones and associations which are essentially sexual. It's true that in French, in the French language perverse simply means deviant or sick or pathologized, pathological. But why do we need yet another term except to aggrandize the injured egos of French psychologists and psychiatrists? Generally, the only contribution the French have made to psychology is to obfuscate it and to ruin completely any meaningful thing ever said. I mean, have a look at Lacan for example and his utterly inane and outlandish psychotherapy. I am not impressed with the contribution of European so-called scholars, not in Russia where they are still using terminology from the 1930s, not in France where they are much more in love with the language than with what it says, and not in the Netherlands where they are trying to reinvent the wheel when there's no need to. When there is a proliferation of terms, it's a sure sign of a pseudo science, not a real science. For example, in physics, we have terms that are used throughout the world universally and uniformly. Energy in Indonesia is energy in Israel, is energy in Russia, is energy in the United States. The same words, same terminology, same meaning, totally agreed upon. Maybe it's the influence of mathematics, but it's a sign of a true science. In mathematics, in biology, in chemistry, we don't have like six terms for the same phenomena, 19 terms for the same substance. It's a single language, single universal lingua franca, look it up. Psychology is among the few exceptions where everyone and his dog comes up with new terms. But wait a minute, Wagner, you can say. You also came up with new terms. Well, here's the rule. If you have prior state of the art, if topics and issues and subjects had been studied and named, you use these names. You use these words, you use these phrases, you don't reinvent the wheel, you don't come up with new terms because it's confusing. It creates a bloody, holy mess. So when I wanted to describe the inner dynamics of the narcissist, I borrowed a term from 1938, I borrowed a phrase, narcissistic supply. When I wanted to describe the split in the narcissist personality, I borrowed a phrase from Helen Deutsch. And that phrase was borrowed by Donald Winnicott and then by Kerenberg, the false self. It's not okay to call the false self by some other name. It's not okay to call narcissistic supply by some other phrase. It's wrong, it's confusing. And the second condition, so the first condition, if it already has a name, use that name. The second condition, evidence-based. You can't simply come up with some concoction. It has to be based on studies, on observations, on clinical data, on cases, case studies. You can just go into a flight of fancy. In this sense, scientists, unlike judges, most judges, scientists are purists. They are originalists and they are textualists. Scientists adhere to previous knowledge, previous language. They maintain continuity so as to render themselves comprehensible to their colleagues all over the world. The only exception is psychology. So, combined narcissism, trash, nonsense, unnecessary. We already have a term for that, malignant narcissists, psychopathic narcissists, if you want to follow Monique Stam. Perverse narcissism, I don't have a clue what this is. Probably pathological narcissism. Why call it perverse? It's confusing. It's also nonsensical. It's also meaningless. Empath, nonsense, shy borderline, no hint of an evidence, no study, no scholarly literature, nothing to support. This concoction, these are nonsensical terms and they represent ignorance and an ego and attempt to inflate the psychologists or the scholars ego in an empty way. It's empty. Don't adhere to such practices. They are bad, they are wrong. And now, someone asked me about the true self, whether the true self is alive, is still alive or not alive. Is there still a spark there? Could it be recharged? Could it be rebooted? Could it be restarted to borrow half-baked metaphors from computer science? Let's stay in computer science. Do you know what is heartbreak? When your device, your smartphone, your tablet, when they suddenly refuse to start up, when they refuse to be charged, when it's just a black screen of death, it's dead, it's utterly dead. This is called breaking. When your device becomes a brick, as good as useful as a brick. Now, there are two types of breaking. Soft-breaking and heart-breaking. Soft-breaking is when the software in the device had gone bad. That usually can be fixed somehow. By refreshing the ROM, I mean, there are various ways that the software can be fixed somehow. You may lose some data, but the software can be fixed and the device comes back to life. But there is another type of breaking, heart-breaking. It's when the device is dead. The motherboard has been fried. Something happened to the battery connector. Something that cannot be reversed, cannot be fixed, cannot be cured, cannot be healed, cannot be maintained. No one can help you. No service shop, nothing. The device is demised, is deceased. This is called heartbreak, and usually has to do with hardware. That's why it's called heartbreak. The true self is heart-breaking. No amount of charging. No amount of recharging. No amount of rebooting and restarting and installing and uploading and no amount of intervention can revive or resuscitate the true self. It's heart-break. It's there, exactly like your device. But it is as useful to the narcissist as your device is to you when it can't start and it can't be charged. Okay, the next question is Eckhart-Eckhart-Tolli. Everyone says that my nothingness, my principle of nothingness is the same as Eckhart-Tolli's and of course many, there were many uncharitable interpretations that I've been stealing my nothingness principle from Eckhart-Tolli. With all due respect to spiritualists and other self-styled gurus like Eckhart-Tolli, Eckhart-Tolli discusses something completely different. He discusses what used to be called ego-death. No self. These are desired goals in many mystical traditions and the experienced outcomes of psychedelics and practices such as meditation are often compared to these states. Like if you consume psychedelics or if you meditate or in yoga in some ways you reach the stage of ego-death not having a self. These are supposed to be precursors, preconditions to enlightenment. And as usual, when Western quote-unquote luminaries from Jung to Tolli they took these concepts from the East and they messed up these pure concepts erroneously and egregiously conflating ego which is a clinical term in psychoanalysis self which is a clinical term in psychoanalysis including Jungian psychoanalysis identity, proprioception they made a holy mess. These self-styled spiritual gurus Eckhart-Tolli first and foremost made a bloody mess of all these concepts created the equivalent of a word salad and told it to you, the brain-dead masses. The field is so hopelessly muddled that it had become comically meaningless and useless and haunted by new age logorria, look it up. Even when one peels off all the layers of the onion the smell of the onion lingers. Someone, when you're enlightened someone is enlightened. There is a person there who is enlightened. Someone experiences annulment endures oceanic feelings merges with the universe and is guided and instructed by the sages there must be someone there as Eckhart had observed correctly kogito erusun I think therefore I am I there must be an I there is no escaping being you cannot escape being what we can avoid with lots of hard and unrelenting work and tedious practice are the categories of existence the ways in which we had perceived and organized the world hitherto the boundaries the restrictions, the inhibitions imposed on us by socialization, by our sense by our minds and by the baggage of social mores and cultural edicts that attend to all the above we can get in direct touch with reality in a manner not mediated obstructed or obfuscated by narratives including our personal narrative or by language but it would still be us to get in touch with reality directly you need to be there there's someone there there's still be someone accomplishing all this Cartesian kernels of consciousness however minimized, however transformed one ought to read the brilliant works of Moshe Kroy in Israel to realize how badly we have strayed from in the West we have strayed from the true messages of traditions such as Sufism Kabbalah, Buddhism and Zen Buddhism and other venerable schools of thought about non-thought so no no way did I borrow from Toli no way do I have anything in common with him and his ilk which I hold in extreme profound contempt about the topic of this video I will not be identified with his fakes the principle of nothingness as I propound it it's a combination of self-awareness self-awareness on the contrary an enhancement of the self leveraging the ego reconstructing it if needed main problem in narcissism is that the ego is dead and so the narcissist resorts to other people to fulfill his dead ego's functions so my principle of nothingness is resuscitating the ego it's enhancing the self constellating the self creating self-awareness at a higher level followed this is followed by total acceptance of everything specially and first of all of yourself once you become self-aware you are on the path to self-acceptance and from there to self-love self-awareness self-acceptance self-love and these negate the need to find meaning in life once you have this you don't need to find meaning in life that's where I clash with Victor Franco and lesser extensions like Jordan Peterson once you have this you don't need to find meaning in life you don't need to compare yourself to any standard any expectation any rule or combination of rules internal or external you just are but as distinct from Eckhart Tolle and the others you are my principle of nothingness that the only way you can truly be and exist is to vanish to not be and exist as others expect you to be and exist right now you think you are you are not what's happening right now is that you are defined by the plethora and the network of your interactions with myriad other people in your past, in your future, in your presence in your present and the people in your past they are in your head they've invaded your mind in the form of introjects my principle of nothingness is getting rid of all this baggage purifying unadulterating yourself so that there's a kernel, a core, a diamond a crystal of yourself left, this is the ego it's not ego death it's not ego death it's agitation, it's ego revival it's exactly the opposite of Tolle and his misinterpretation of Eastern traditions okay, got it kiddos let's continue next question Wagner, I caught you in a contradiction you say that narcissists love promiscuous women and then you say that narcissists hate promiscuous women can you make up your mind well, you didn't catch me in a contradiction I'm sorry narcissists are terrified of female sexuality, end of story this is a fact it's a foundational fact they are terrified of women and more so terrified of their sexuality and of course they abhor dread promiscuous women the epitome and quintessence of female unbridled free spirited sexuality they hate such women but they are also attracted to them inexorably this is known as ambivalence we are often very attracted or very curious or very fascinated by things that also repel us the most frighten us the most that's why we watch horror movies we watch horror movies because we are attracted and fascinated by things that frighten us so the narcissists are frightened by these women but also attracted to them powerfully, forcefully he cannot resist it, irresistibly why? because only promiscuous women can modify the narcissists he is fascinated with promiscuous women the same way we, all of us are fascinated with death these women promise him and encounter with his with himself without the force of promise him experience if you wish, they are like psychedelics so he is attracted to them second thing the narcissist is not jealous and is jealous vaknin can you make up your mind the narcissist is jealous only romantically jealous only when abandonment is imminent then his object of inconstancy is provoked his abandonment anxiety is provoked and he becomes romantically jealous romantic jealousy is a misnomer it's another name for fear of loss we become romantically jealous because we are afraid to lose our partner to someone else so that's when he is romantically jealous the rest of the time he is not romantically jealous he is the least possessive he doesn't have a jealous bone in his body except when threatened with abandonment and then he becomes the polar opposite of this he becomes super possessive insanely romantically jealous paranoid the secretary constricting tyrannical when he foresees when he smells when he intweets impending abandonment it's imminent he goes bananas he becomes the exact polar opposite of what he usually is a true macho chauvinistic man you know your his property and he will not let you stray stray around ok it's time to get to the topic of today's video and after the topic I'll read to you two selections from the literature as had become our much wanted wanted look it up tradition all of you of course have noticed the the covert and sometimes very overt line strand hue of contempt in all my videos very contemptuous I mask it as humor I mask it as you know but I'm contemptuous it's very clear then all narcissists are contemptuous they all regard you as contemptible and I'm going to review several triggers of contempt but by no mean is this an exhaustive list because the light and the narcissist is capable of being triggered into extreme overt aggressive malevolent contempt by everything literally he is constructed all the world and others in the world with maximal contempt it's part of his grandiosity an integral part it buttresses the grandiosity and it creates a favorable relative positioning which supports his sense his innate sense of superiority so it's indispensable is what I'm trying to say take away the contempt precisely what we do in cold therapy by the way ok the first thing number one on the hit list is weakness narcissists detest weakness and any sign of frailty dependence weakness neediness clinging the problem is that narcissists interpret almost everything as a weakness now mind you there's a difference between weakness vulnerability vulnerability is an opportunity vulnerability is the level the access point the intrusion point which a narcissist and a psychopath can make use of to convert you to provide something so the narcissist scans you as does the psychopath they use cold empathy they scan you they pinpoint within split seconds by the way they pinpoint your vulnerabilities and these they don't regard as weaknesses these they regard as opportunities in other words your vulnerabilities are imbued and suffused with positive emotionality in the narcissist and psychopath it's important to understand this distinction you can be totally vulnerable totally open gullible even sometimes stupid but if this could lead to narcissistic supply or to sex or to money or to power or to any other goal if this is helpful in attaining goals these vulnerabilities fault lines fractures less than optimal traits and characteristics of you these will be actually idealized the narcissist would regard them as endearing it would render you more complex you would say that you're complex that you're amazing that you are incredible that you're multi-layered that you're an enigma he would tend to idealize these because he can abuse them to exploit you to extract from you what he needs including supply weakness is something else weakness is a character trait or a behavior which do not yield anything as far as analysis of psychopaths are concerned they don't they can't be leveraged they can't be abused they can't be exploited they are irrelevant to the narcissist and psychopaths agenda and yet they imply that you are susceptible that you are broken that you are damaged that you are weak that you are frail so these behaviors they are despicable because they render you inferior it's all about inferiority what the narcissist and psychopaths cannot use they discard and if you present a package to you they can use some parts of you but can't use other parts of you they can use some traits but have no use for other traits they leverage some behaviors of yours but other behaviors are irrelevant or even dysfunctional or counterproductive when you present such a package to you it creates dissonance in the narcissist and psychopaths on the one hand the narcissist and psychopath needs you wants you you have something to give him that he needs and wants in other words you are in a position of superiority in some sense you are source of supply they need your supply you are superior to him if you can give him advice but on the other hand there is a part of you that is tangential a fringe part which infringes on and encroaches on the other part which is useful it's kind of the price the narcissist and psychopaths has to pay to be with you like the narcissist and psychopaths are likely to say you are so wonderful you are so beautiful you are so perfect but you are so gullible you trust people too much you make wrong decisions you are stupid you procrastinate they can't countenance they can't accept the complexity of human beings because they have a splitting defense mechanism they are infantile they are children they split everything dichotomous thinking black and white thinking positive negative everything is either 100% good 100% bad, 100% useful 100% useless and when they come across someone with 50-50 in anything it confuses them it makes them feel inferior and they are projecting this sense of inferiority on to you and they deplore your weaknesses their theory of mind and their theory and understanding of the world as it should be the world as the narcissist the world should be as the narcissist thinks it should be and any deviation from the narcissist idealized model of the universe and reality reality is problem, not the narcissist it reminds me that Einstein was asked someone asked him listen, your theory predicts if light passes next to the sun the light will not move in a straight line what happens Einstein was asked what happens if the light does move in a straight line line and negates your theory Einstein said well then light and the sun have a problem not my theory it's exactly a very narcissistic reaction he was not a narcissist by the way okay the second thing is any perceived inferiority contempt is virulently and viscerally triggered automatically by any perceived inferiority inferiority could be on any level intellectual inferiority of course physical inferiority that's why narcissists and psychopaths react to disability with contempt with derision with mockery with disgust with revulsion revolt so any inferiority but also for example moral inferiority some narcissists cast themselves in the roles of saints or victims or sages or gurus, spiritual gurus are proposed at the beginning of the video and so they are sanctimonious they are self-righteous they attain the high moral ground and if you don't if you don't abide by their strict and sadistic benchmarks yardsticks then something is wrong with you you are morally inferior and they have the right to blast you to kingdom come to hell come they have the right to castigate you to chastise you to publicly humiliate you to put you straight or to punish you if nothing else works so moral inferiority many of the people you see who are preachers moral compasses and so on they are actually covert narcissists that's why I think empaths are covert narcissists because they have this holier than thou high moral ground sanctimonious self-righteousness all around them it's an aura this is the most repulsive thing I've ever seen you know so when the narcissists and psychopaths perceive inferiority on any level, intellectual for example the cerebral narcissists vary out now the thing is that they need to feel superior and grandiose and above everyone and leaders and compasses and guide and guides they need to stand apart from the madding crowd their need is so so pressing so hardwired that even when there's no inferiority to be discerned nothing observable they will invent it they will find something they will concoct something so they will reframe they will gaslight they will confabulate anything to obtain the desired result of you inferior me superior so they will they will hunt for mistakes in pronunciation contradictions in speech yes those of you who write to me comments in all probability are highly narcissistic so they will try to drag the other into their level bring someone down a peg reduce him to size they hate when people are better more knowledgeable more handsome more beautiful more something no one needs to be, no one can be and no one should be and they want to drag accomplished people or people with with natural endowments and assets or more clever people they want to drag him down they want to reduce them they want to minimize them and ultimately they want to corrupt them so they would set up tests they would push you to behave immorally to do something socially unacceptable to make a mistake they would create a lot of stress and anxiety and tension they would harass you and harangue and hector and set you up for failure and defeat and then gloat with glee at your misadventures and mishaps and so this is a way of introducing inferiority infusing with inferiority situations in reality which don't have a trace of inferiority in them with inferiority is an organizing principle it imbues the narcissist's life with meaning and his superiority is an explanatory principle for example it explains why the narcissist is not accomplished because he is superior and people envy him they passive-aggressively sabotage him here you are it makes meaning it renders his discombobulated chaotic life meaningful it's not his fault there is a lot plastic defense here there is external modification these people they are inferior they are malevolent, they are malicious they are stupid, they are ignorant they are so of course they they do this to me it's not plastic defense the price analysis is based on this an external locus of control it's like I'm surrounded by so many morons by so many vicious wicked people I it creates a paranoid a secretary state of mind so I'm at the mercy of these people I can't fight all of them all the time I try but I can't I realize that my effort to reform everyone around me to bring them up to my level is doomed it's an admission in essence of defeat ironically assuming that everyone is inferior to you is self-defeating because ultimately you're left all by yourself it's a solipsistic stance you're left all by yourself but the narcissist cannot countenance true solitude for narcissistic supply it's a self-defeating self-destructive way of thinking that's why the narcissist chooses people to idealize because he can't regard everyone as inferior he must select the precious view to idealize so that he can co-idealize idealize himself by idealizing them and obtain supply another thing the narcissist holds in severe contempt all pervasive cellular contempt is inadequacy the narcissist regards the world as a hostile jungle everything is a win-lose I win, you lose you win, God forbid, I lose everything is zero sum plus and minus together is zero, zero sum your minus, my plus, hopefully but it's always a zero sum I'm a winner you're a loser I'm a success, you're a failure this is the vocabulary of the narcissist and because of that the narcissist must compare, all the time competencies, skills talents and adequacies and if you end up with a short stick with a short end of the stick if you come down being inadequate not talented, not skilled must hold you in extreme disdain I mean, you're less than human to be weak not strong not a victor, not triumphant not to prevail over others not to be top lobster apropos not to fit into a hierarchy of dominance not to attain the higher rank that means you are a zero nobody and this is the main message of course of Jordan Peterson I'm sorry to say now, and Donald Trump ironically, Jordan Peterson and Donald Trump have a lot in common I can't much see the differences between them Donald Trump is much more vulgar much more coarse he has severe difficulty to put three words together Peterson is more adept linguistically but the message is the same, identical the narcissist deplores mocks derives and decries emotions and even much more so the display of emotions so you can have emotions but hide them hide them effectively be self-efficacious in not communicating your inner world your inner landscape because emotions are weaknesses emotions are disadvantages once you communicate your emotion you open to attack people can make use of your emotions abuse your emotional needs people when you are when you emote feel when you have emotions you are weaker for example you need empathy you need sympathy you need a friend that moment you are weaker many predators many predators spend all their lives spotting women sad, broken women after a breakup, after a divorce after a bad fight they take them to bed they get them to sleep with them they get to have sex with them because they leverage expertly these women's needs for support and vice versa you can reverse gender pronouns throughout this presentation so emotion means openness means access means leverage means goal means mission accomplished if there is a predator and you are sad you will end up in bed with him if there is a predator and you are hesitant and you are confused he will end up with your money a corner artist, a scammer emotions are bad for you it's like on the cigarettes you know surgeon general warned that emotions are bad for you bad for your health bad for your longevity bad for your self respect and self esteem after a one night stand with someone you didn't want to sleep with this is what emotions do to you try to the best of your ability to eschew emotions to give them up or at the very least don't give intelligence to the enemy don't communicate your emotions remain poker faced remain composed pretend, act, lie, confabulate or communicate the wrong emotion to mislead to mislead the adversary it's all in the narcissist's life everyone is everyone's enemy everyone's opponent and adversary it's all a gigantic game of chess and in chess if you show your counterparty if you sweat if you like Spassky and Bobby Fisher if you if you disclose what's happening inside you that's an advantage the use of it will move the right pawns and the right on the chess board and you're done you're finished you hide your emotions you will be a champion any vulnerability that is not, I remind you any vulnerability that cannot be leveraged and used and abused and exploited to obtain something, some goal is contemptible is disdained is rejected so emotions are the number one top of the list vulnerability they are portals emotions are portals access points we have in computers intrusion detection systems they are where the hackers where the life hackers can come in they can hack your life they can compromise your operating system they can take over the computer ransomware you'll have to pay to restart yourself be very careful in disclosing your emotions especially in today's world any analysis is in psychopath will tell you and don't ever be needy or clinging or show that you need something or that you want something to want to desire after to be needy to be clinging to show with facial expressions and body language that you hurt that you are afraid no, no very bad policy neediness is repulsive clinging is disgusting it makes you a human parasite a leech virus the codependent I mean nothing the psychopath analysis detests more than a truly codependent person ironically they end up with many codependents and many borderlines and yet these are the two types of people they detest most the borderline the borderline decompensates acts out falls apart and disintegrates disintegrates the slightest hint of rejection and abandonment and the codependent is all over the narcissist and the psychopath she wants his time, she wants his attention she wants him to regulate some of her inner functions psychological functions she relies on him for a sense of self-worth and self-esteem she derives from him wisdom and guidance and the narcissist finds all this absolutely beyond the pale and contemptible some narcissists psychopathic narcissists and of course all psychopaths they are not beyond making use of neediness and clinging they would spot these traits in you, these behaviors and they would co-opt you into a cult now the cult could be two people the cult could be two million people but it's a cult narcissists and psychopaths seek out needy, clinging, codependent ego compromised decompensative acting out people like borderlines and codependents and they create cults but the cult is always goal-oriented the aim of the cult is adoration and admiration narcissists and psychopaths sex, there are cults based around sex money always goal-oriented attachment, bonding love you notice that I'm about to throw up these are biak these are really sleazy, smarmy things they are like slimy they are like something you have to wash yourself very thoroughly after any expression of I love you attachment, bonding empathy is either manipulative the woman who tells you I love you she wants something, what does she want what is her agenda where is it all going what is she scheming here because narcissists and psychopaths project their inner dynamics onto others and they know that when they tell you I love you it's because they want something they are leading somewhere it's part of the love-bombing, the grooming the shirt fantasy it's all part of a narrative a very long-term narrative they see the end, you don't they have seen this movie, you haven't and so on the one hand any expression of attachment, bonding and love provokes the secretary delusions paranoia what's going on here where is the knife that is going to end up in my back who is going to bite my back and when is she colluding with someone is it all part of a mega wicked doctor strange love plan kind of that's on one hand on the other hand it of course expresses vulnerability vulnerability of a bad guy neediness, clinging so the narcissist feels suffocated strangle stifled imprisoned incarcerated restricted constricted bad bad bad bad is a motion reaction to statements of allegiance of affiliation of a motion positive emotions like love attachment long-term planning demands for commitment and investment his reaction is horrible he just wants to bolt he wants to vanish, he wants to go away things have gone seriously awry oh my god she is in love with me horrible now many of them will not show you this on the contrary they will reciprocate and they do this for two reasons first of all in some cases your positive emotionality can be leveraged to obtain goals you love me ok give me money you love me ok sleep with me so they convert positive emotionality temporarily into goal orientation and the second reason is they want to mislead you you are playing a game there is something of foot like Sherlock Holmes used to say the game is a foot is set with all the pieces ok let's play honey you tell me you love me I'll tell you I love you like the gambit it's a gambit you move your pawn I move my pawn no problem let's there's a saying I'm a Moroccan Jew there's a saying in Morocco follow the thief to the door don't stop the thief wait see where he's going same with the noses and psychopath you tell me you love me I'll play your game no problem as long as it takes I want to see where you're going I know you're going to cheat on me I know you're going to abandon me I know you're going to steal my money I know you're exactly like me I know you're goal oriented what's your goal I want to know your goal I'm going to unearth you I'm going to blow up your cover up I'm going to unearth reveal and expose your true agenda empathy bad for you bad thing empathy has two elements which call for contempt the first one it implies that you can get to know the narcissist that there is a way for you to resonate with the narcissist in other words it implies equality with the narcissist no way no shape no form narcissist rejects attempts to compare yourself to him via empathy the second thing is as usual the narcissist attributes agenda why would you use such a skill like empathy if you don't want to accomplish something like you use empathy to decipher the narcissist to read between the lines to get to know him better why would you want to get to know him better to manipulate him of course so in the narcissist's mind empathy is called empathy he is not aware of any other kind of empathy he's never experienced warm emotional empathy trying to communicate color to call a colorblind person as we will see in a minute so when you show empathy he says she's using cold empathy when I use cold empathy is to obtain something what does she want and gradually these things accumulate every incident of a declaration of love every time you declare your love every time you show attachment every time you care for him every time you demonstrate empathy for him every time you tell him I understand you I love you these things accumulate it's a negative balance it's not your credit it's a liability because the more you show the more you demonstrate the more you exhibit the more you display these traits and behaviors your love your empathy the more suspicious the narcissist becomes it's getting out of hand that must be something really really she's planning something seriously bad and wicked or she had done something really bad and she feels guilty and now she's trying to overcompensate for it it's always in the background a narrative of perfidy look it up, betrayal a narrative of back biting and back stabbing a narrative of who is going to end up with the upper hand it's me or her one of us is going to be left standing one of us is going to survive this one of us is going to survive both it's war unto the death altruism is perceived the same way to be altruistic you need to be really stupid because you're giving something of yourself if you're stupid what am I doing with you and the alternative is that you're using altruism you're using giving as a manipulative tool or a tool to control other people so you're competing with the narcissist so it's either you're an idiot or you're a competitor and in the narcissist world competition is cut throat, cut throat physically so if you're a competitor it's going to demolish you it's going to vanquish you it's going to destroy you it's going to lead you to your ruination if you compete with him by being nice to other people you're trying to co-opt other people to turn other people against him it's going to demolish you and your brick will be left if on the other hand you're altruistic for no gain and for no reason then you are seriously stupid you're intellectually challenged and it makes it very difficult to idealize you and then if the narcissist cannot idealize you he cannot idealize himself a psychopath when he sees an altruistic person wants to take everything she has to offer but once he had taken everything she has to offer he would be very hesitant to be with you if you're an altruist charitable loving generous giving the psychopath wants to take everything you have to give but then once he had taken everything he would be very hesitant to be with you because the psychopath is very afraid to be with a stupid partner a stupid partner can compromise him can lead to his downfall so he doesn't want stupid partners he wants clever cunning smart in a bad way partners he wants partners like him partners who will be able to collude with him to conspire with him to cheat other people to steal from other people to abuse other people and that's why psychopaths and narcissists are into group sex and free sounds narcissists very frequently will say we hunt together you and I are going to find sex partners because it's like both of us are the same and we are abusing the cattle we are abusing the brain dead brain dead sheeple out there these are not humans these are eat to shit machines we can do anything to them they don't have the rights of human beings if human beings have any rights at all only narcissists and psychopaths have rights because they are so vastly superior that there are other species all together ok in the next video I'm going to discuss counter projection your warrant now I want to read to you two segments from literature the first one is the book is a brief history of everyone who ever lived the human story retold through our genes the author is Adam Rutherford a brief history of everyone who ever lived by Adam Rutherford there's a segment there and this section that I'm going to read to you has to do with color blindness but I encourage you mentally to change internally to replace whenever I say color blind replace it with narcissists and I'm quoting some women might be tetrachromatic tetrachromatic means you can perceive four four colors human beings most human beings perceive three colors red green and blue tetrachromatic people perceive four colors so some women might women only women might be tetrachromatic they, these women through another random chance duplication have acquired a fourth option, option is a protein that translates like have acquired a fourth option on one of their X chromosomes around one in eight women are estimated to have this extra gene variant but whether that bestows tetrachromacy is not yet known the ones who do have this power and now think narcissists the ones who do have this power to see four colors they see colors where we see monotones it's a new area of research and the condition appears to be rare and poorly accounted for a few women have been studied and they seem to see clear differences in colors that are merely shades to normal people trichromats when examining red green color blindness the Ishihara test presents a circle containing circles in different use hidden in this circle in plain sight to those with typical vision is a number but due to the design of the shades that pick out the number it is invisible to color blind people so Ishihara test is circles within circles within circles and then there's a number only color blind people cannot see this number and then women can see four colors one-eighth of women so you begin to see the you begin to see the equivalencies and it's an allegory of narcissism in a way narcissists can't see the number and definitely they cannot see four hues or four colors they can't even see three they can see one and it's not a color it's totally gray they are color blind narcissists are color blind empathy blind human blind emotion blind the tetra I'm continuing from the book the tetra chromat test also rests on the ability to discriminate distinct hues of green where we only see olive okay another excerpt from the book universe exploring the astronomical world universe exploring the astronomical world the editor was Victoria Clark it was published by Fiden a big publisher of art books and this section this excerpt is about art ostensibly listen well Yayoi Kusama is an internationally recognized artist who was born in 1929 in Japan in 1959 at the age of 30 she moved to New York where she became part of the avant-garde scene she works primarily in sculpture and installation but has been actively involved in other forms of art according to the broad contemporary art museum her piece the mirrored room the souls of millions of light years away is a mirror line chamber housing a dazzling and seemingly endless LED light display this experimental experiential artwork has extremely limited capacity accommodating one visitor at a time for about one minute requires a separate timed same day reservation an allegory of the Narcissus Hall of Mirrors you are introduced into the Narcissus Hall of Mirrors and you see yourself in an idealized form I encourage you to watch the relevant videos I am quoting from the book Universe Exploring the Astronomical World to enter this mirror room made by the Japanese artist Yayoi Kusama born 1929 to enter this room is to enter disorienting cosmos in which mirrors and LED lights combine to create a multitude that repeats itself to infinity Kusama's inner universe becomes as expansive as the wider universe and viewers find themselves transported into an illusion of the immensity of the cosmos the rich tones Kusama selected for the LED lights recall the palette of scientific imagining and scientific imaging of deep space notably the Hubble deep field Kusama's infinity mirror room the souls of millions of light years away is a tangible three-dimensional expression of this paradigm shifting moment of cosmic imagery Yayoi Kusama's work is the expression of her often inspired by hallucinatory experiences in childhood and early adulthood when she saw herself in all encompassing spaces covered in patterns she first conjured these in the 1950s in her infinity nets seemingly boundless and heavily worked abstract paintings punctuated by countless marks polka dots and webs with the infinity mirror room installations that she started in the 1960s Kusama expanded her painting practice onto an experiential environment which itself becomes a spatial representation of her inner world universe exploring the astronomical world I hope you enjoyed and next video we're going to talk about counter projection and several topics which have to do with narcissism dissociative identity disorder cyberpathy, it's a new diagnosis conscience and delusion and other similar topics this next video is going to be very rich and I'm always open to questions the answers to which you cannot find on my youtube channel how to search my youtube channel you go up next to the about section there is a magnifying glass magnifying glass, click on it a search box opens type the keywords and you'll find the videos in my channel that are relevant to your query do this before you waste my time asking me questions it's courtesy it's a civil way to interact don't do this you're entitled you act entitled and this may remind you is a narcissistic trait