 Item █ SCP-3008 Object Class, Euclid Special Containment Procedures The retail park containing SCP-3008 has been purchased by the Foundation and converted into site ██. All public roads leading to or passing by site ██ have been redirected. The entrance to SCP-3008 is to be monitored at all times, and no one is to enter SCP-3008 outside of testing, as permitted by the Senior Researcher. Exiting SCP-3008 are to be detained and then debriefed prior to the administration of anesthetics. Dependent on the duration of their stay in SCP-3008, a cover story may need to be generated prior to their release. Any other entities exiting SCP-3008 are to be terminated. Description SCP-3008 is a large retail unit previously owned by and branded as IKEA, a popular furniture retail chain. A person entering SCP-3008 through the main entrance and then passing out of site of the doors will find themselves translocated to SCP-3008-1. This displacement will typically go unnoticed, as no change will occur from the perspective of the victim. They will generally not become aware until they try to return to the entrance. SCP-3008-1 is a space resembling the inside of an IKEA furniture store, extending far beyond the limits of what could physically be contained within the dimension of the retail unit. Current measurements indicate an area of at least 10 km2, with no visible external terminators detected in any direction. Inconclusive results from the use of laser rangefinders have led to the speculation that the space may be infinite. SCP-3008-1 is inhabited by an unknown number of civilians trapped within prior to containment. Further data suggests that they have formed a rudimentary civilization within SCP-3008-1, including the construction of settlements and fortifications for the purpose of defending against SCP-3008-2. SCP-3008-2 are humanoid entities that exist within SCP-3008-1. While superficially resembling humans, they possess exaggerated inconsistent bodily proportions, often described as being too short or too tall. They possess no facial features, and in all observed cases wear a yellow shirt and blue trousers consistent with the IKEA employee uniform. SCP-3008-1 has a rudimentary day-night cycle, determined by the overhead lighting within the space activating and deactivating at times consistent with the opening and closing times of the original retail store. During the night, instances of SCP-3008-2 will become violent towards all other life forms within SCP-3008-1. During these bouts of violence, they have been heard to vocalize phrases in English that are typically variations of, the store is now closed, please exit the building. Once day begins, SCP-3008-2 instances immediately become passive and begin moving throughout SCP-3008-1 seemingly at random. They are unresponsive to questioning or other verbal cues in this state that will react violently if attacked. SCP-3008-1 is known to have one or more axes located within, though these axes do not appear to have a fixed position, making it difficult to leave SCP-3008-1 once inside. Using any other door besides the main entrance to enter the structure or breaking through the walls of the retail unit leads into the non-anomalous interior of the original store. Since containment began, 14 individuals have managed to exit SCP-3008. During extensive debriefing, all individuals have been administered amnestics and released. Incident-3008-1 At 0037 on ██████, a human male exited SCP-3008, followed 10 seconds later by an instance of SCP-3008-2. SCP-3008-2 caught and killed the man before its self being terminated by armed response personnel. This incident represents the only time an instance of SCP-3008-2 has been seen exiting SCP-3008. A full autopsy on the course was performed. See 3008-2 autopsy log for more details. The man was carrying an Ikea branded journal, seeming to document his time in SCP-3008-1, transcribed below verbatim. So I'm writing as the document that I can only assume is my sudden descent into insanity. I can't possibly be that bad of a navigator, and yet, as I write this, I've been trapped in Ikea for two days. I haven't seen another person the entire time I've been here. I thought it was a prank at first, turn the place into a maze, get all the people out and see how long it takes me to get lost, then everyone has a good old laugh. Realized that wasn't the case when I tried to backtrack. Everything had changed, so I ended up lost. Instead of the exit, it was just row after row of bookcases. So I'm trapped in Ikea. Sounds like the setup for a bad joke. The lights went out at 10pm, nearly gave me a fucking heart attack, that loud electrical thunk sound, and then pitch blackness. Place is full of bedzo, and my phone has a torch on it. But no damn signal. So I found a bed and went to sleep. Spent most of the next day trying to find my way out with no luck. Didn't find a restaurant serving those meatballs though, so at least I won't starve. That's probably the punchline to that joke. Anyway, they were still warm and fresh, but I haven't seen anyone around who could have cooked them. Made my way back to the beds before the lights cut out again, since it's too dark to search with them off. It's 9.10am now, the lights came back on a little while ago. I am sure I've searched the entire area around where I came in now, and the exit obviously isn't there, so I'm going to pick a direction and hope for the best. Day 3 of my magical Ikea mystery adventure. If I wasn't sure if there was something seriously weird about this place before, I am now. Walked for three hours in a more or less straight line, insert Ikea joke here, before I came across a ladder next to one of those huge stock shelves they have here. Climbed up to get my bearings, and it looks like this place just stretches on forever. Like that scene from The Lion King, except instead of trees and grass, it was all shelves and tables and crap. I did see a person moving not too far away though, so I headed over. Thought it was a staff member at first, it was wearing the uniform, and hell, maybe it was. Maybe freakish seven foot tall monsters with long arms, short legs, and no faces are just the kind of things they want working at Super Ikea. Damn thing completely ignored me though, and with no eyes or ears I can't even be sure it knew I was there. Thought about shoving it or something to get its attention, but its hands were big enough to crush a watermelon, so I decided against it. It just kept moving along and eventually I lost sight of it, so I decided to carry on the way I was going. Anyway, no comfy bed for me tonight. Looks like I've entered the improbably hard and pointy table section of the store. Guess I'll have to make do with some bunched up tablecloths. Phone battery died during the day too, didn't work anyway, but I feel like I've lost some vital lifeline. Ever see one of those cartoons where they're going through doors in a hallway and they just pop out of another door in the same hallway? That's how I feel right now. I've seen nothing but the same identical bookshelf for two days now, just row after row after row of them. I mean come on, I love books as much as the next guy, but this is excessive. I'm obviously still moving forward though, I can see the signs hanging overhead passing by. Too bad none of them say exit. I'm sure who I was addressing that question to. Let's just say it was practice for the autobiography I'm going to write when I get out of here. I'll call it my perfectly normal trip to a regular old Ikea, if I ever get out. Finally found some other people. Yeah, turns out I'm not the only poor bastard trapped in here. Lucky for me, I guess. My sixth night here, two of those staff things came at me in the dark, different from the first one I saw but still messed up, heard them coming. They were saying that the store was closed and I had to leave the building, all nice and polite like. I'm not sure which part of that was weirder, that they didn't have mouths or that they were apparently trying to kill me while they were saying it. Came at me like rabbit dogs. So I legged it, sprinting through Ikea in the dark like a fucking madman. I saw it when I cleared another stand of those giant stock shelves, all lit up with torches and floodlights. They built a whole town in here, got a massive wall built out of shelves and beds and tables and whatever else. I swear to God, it was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. Anyway, I guess they saw me coming, or maybe they heard my manly bellows of fear, because they had a gate open and two people were there waving me in. Heard the staff things slamming to the gate behind me after it closed, still politely informing us all that the store was now closed. They wandered off eventually though. They called the town exchange, because that's what's on the sign hanging from the ceiling directly above it, exchange and returns, all lit up against a night using lights they found and plugged into the power lines. And there are beds and food and people, over fifty wonderful people with regular sized limbs and a full set of facial features. It's now my seventh night here, and the first one not spent in darkness, a full week living in Ikea. There's probably a TV show in that somewhere. Now that I'm around other people I'm starting to feel more normal. Maybe normal isn't the word, but after a week with only the sound of my own footsteps for company, I was becoming increasingly sure that I'd just gone nuts. That I was tied up in some padded room somewhere, banging my head against the wall. But no, I feel quite sane now, thank you very much. Apparently there are other towns out there, some with more people, some with less. I've found that fairly mind-boggling. How can that many people go missing with no one noticing? Surely someone must have noticed that everyone who goes into Ikea seems to fucking vanish. Or maybe it's not everyone, maybe we're just the lucky ones. The people here just call those staff monsters things the staff. Apparently they are fine during the day, minding their own business walking the aisles. As soon as those lights go off though, they go fucking bonkers. So during the day people go out to find food, water, and whatever else they need. Apparently there are restaurants and shops around that randomly get restocked. No one knows how. Maybe the staff do it. Apparently they aren't very good at their jobs though, because the restocking sometimes take a while, which means the food needs to get rationed. Maybe if they weren't so busy chasing people around in the dark to get more done. Anyway, when night comes the staff goes nuts and everyone holds up inside the walls. Apparently it's the same everywhere in this place, whatever this place is. The Ur Ikea, from whence all other Ikea's spring, or maybe we're all just in the regular Ikea and it's just some fever dream brought on by mind-numbing boredom. Who knows. Been here for ten days now. Most of the people I asked said they stopped keeping track a long time ago, and one guy at Chris said he'd been in here for years. YEARS. Eligible scribbles. Apparently there are rumors of people who do manage to get out, and of people who see the exit only to have it vanished before their very eyes. I get the feeling not everyone believes that, but I do. Explains how we got stuck in here in the first place, sort of. And I mean, come on. Staff monsters? Row after endless row of high quality, sweetest furniture? I don't know why they would find a disappearing door so hard to believe in. Anyway, I went out scavenging for food at a nearby shop with Sandra and Jerry today. Once you've learned the landmarks of this place it's not so hard to navigate. The overhead signs help a lot, but there are others. Not too far in the distance a huge section of those giant stock shelves have collapsed against each other, and way off in the east, we all assume it's east anyway. Apparently Ikea doesn't sell compasses. Is some kind of tower that looks like it's made of wood reaches all the way to the ceiling? Maybe they were trying to break out through the roof. Lights up at night so there must be people there, but it's apparently a few days walk, which means it must be miles away, so no one here really knows for sure. Apparently I got incredibly lucky sleeping out in the open for a week without getting ripped to bits by the staff. That's me. Lucky lucky lucky. We found some food in the shop. Guests of staff restocked it during the night, which was nice of them. There was a telephone on the wall so I figured I'd try it out. There was a voice on the other end, but they were just talking nonsense, random words strung together with no real meaning. Ever see a video of someone with aphasia? Kinda sounded like that. Didn't answer me when I spoke to them anyway. Sandra says all the phones in here are the same. Oops, asking the journal questions again. I was thinking last night. The ceiling on this place is pretty high, and as far as anyone can tell it goes on forever. Shouldn't there be some kind of weather in here? I'm sure I've read about some NASA building that was so big it had its own weather patterns, with clouds and stuff. This place is definitely bigger than that, but now that I think about it, I'm pretty sure I've never felt so much of the temperature change in here. I'll add it to the grand list of weird bullshit. The staff attacked the exchange last night, most have been twenty or thirty of them all just asking us to leave the store calm as you like, while trying to smash the walls down with their bare hands. Apparently this happens pretty regularly, so everyone is prepared for it. Nights from the restaurant, lawnmower blades made in the hatchets, a fire axe, one guy was seen even made a functional crossbow. Anyway, the walls have holes in them, which I hadn't noticed before, specifically so we can stab out at the staff when they attack. Took a couple of them down myself, they don't seem to bleed, which is weird, but they go down as easy as a regular person once you start sticking holes in them. We had to haul the bodies away in the morning, apparently the dead ones will attract more during the night, so we had to get them away from exchange. We have a couple of those trolley things that are used to move big boxes around, so we loaded them up and took them over to pick up. Apparently people just name everything in here after whatever sign is hanging around. Pick up was grisly, there were a hundred, maybe thousands of dead staff all piled up. There was no smell which was a blessing, apparently in addition to not bleeding these things don't rot either. My karyosi got to better me when we were unloading them, so I took a look at one of the more cut up ones, they're just skin, or something that looks like skin all the way through. No muscle, no bone, no organs. Are they even really alive in the first place? They certainly seem like they have bones when they were moving around, pounding on the walls, and I'm sure I felt more resistance than just skin when the knife went in during the night. Maybe something happens to them when they die. There's one more thing on the ever increasing list of weird shit that goes on in here I guess. Something occurred to me, after the staff attacked the other night, every time you see a situation like this on TV or in a film, like it's the end of the world or everyone is trapped on an island or whatever, once groups like ours start to form, people always seem to turn on each other, fighting for food or dominance or whatever else. That hasn't happened here. Apparently people from other towns come by from time to time, just to check in or occasionally to trade if they are short on something, but everything is always cordial, friendly even. Maybe it's the threat to the staff or perhaps the constant restocking of supplies in the shops means there's nothing much to fight over. Maybe people are just better than they are generally given credit for. That's a nice thought, I think I'll go with that one. A dozen people showed up to the gates this afternoon from a town called Trollies. Apparently the staff broke through the walls and tore the town apart during the night. Most twelve are the only survivors out of a hundred. We let them in, obviously, one more point in the human decency column. Later I asked if anyone knew how many of these towns there were out there. Between us and the new folks, we managed to come up with over twenty names, twenty towns filled with people, and who knows how many beyond that. The motto for this place should be, How is that even possible? Surely someone, somewhere, must be looking for the thousands of people that must be in here. I've been here for a little over two months now. Not that much changes, as it turns out. A couple of new people showed up, same story as the rest of us. Nice little trip to Ikea and suddenly they're trapped in Billy Bookcase's house of faceless weirdos. The staff attacked the exchange once or twice a week. We kill them and haul their bodies off. Sometimes they hurt some of us first. They killed a guy called Jared a couple of weeks back. It was awful, frankly. Turns out regular humans still bleed in here, even if the staff don't. We tried our best, but none of us here are doctors. Jared was a good guy, he deserved better. We all do. It occurred to me a couple of days after that, none of us were really looking for a way out of here. I don't even know where we'd start. One of those quadcopter things with a camera attached buzz past exchange today, I thought it meant that someone was finally looking for us, that help was on the way. Apparently it's not the first time this has happened though. Same thing happened a few months ago, and everyone is still here. No idea if it saw us, it didn't stop if it did, just kept flying until we could no longer see it. Note, based on recovery time of the journal, this entry appears to line up approximately with our first successful test piloting a drone inside SCP-3008-1. Analysis of footage shows a walled settlement under a sign labeled, Exchange and Returns. Attempts to relocate the settlement failed. Even a previously sighted drone is unknown. I started talking to people about the stuff they missed from home during dinner today. Probably not the best idea I've ever had, everyone seemed pretty down after. A bunch of people here have families, husbands and wives, kids, dogs, Franklin apparently has a pet llama, though I'm not sure I'd buy that. But apparently some of the people here have some seriously odd gaps in their knowledge. Three of them had never heard of the International Space Station. Two of them seemed to think ██████ was the Prime Minister, and one of them had apparently never heard of the Statue of Liberty. I believe them too, they seem just as confused as the rest of us. The more I thought about it, though, the more I started to explain a few things. What if the reason no one is looking for all of us missing people is because we haven't all come to the same place? This is going to sound weird, maybe that should be the motto for this place, but What if all the people here have come from different dimensions? Realities? Whatever you call it. I've seen enough TV shows that know the drill. Sarah comes from a place where there is no Statue of Liberty, they didn't launch a space station where was seen is from. If everyone here came from different places, even from ones that seem identical, there would be no huge missing persons panic, no mass search. We'd just be a blip, a single missing person in a world of non-stop news. Well, that was a fun train of thought. Just realized that yesterday was a six-month anniversary of my arrival here. I wonder if Ikea sells party hats. The routine around here has remained more or less the same. More new folks show up, one every couple of weeks or so. Food supplies go up and down, though we never actually had a major shortage. Occasionally we get a visitor from one of the nearby towns, usually checkouts or aisle 630. We check in with each other from time to time, occasionally trade supplies if someone gets particularly low on something. It's comforting in a way. A reminder that we aren't alone in here. Some small glimmer of civilization. Sometimes they bring medical supplies. Apparently there's a pharmacy a few towns down from checkouts that get restocked every now and then, so they share out what they can. I've never heard of an Ikea with a pharmacy before, but at this point I wouldn't be surprised if someone stumbled on an Ikea Oregon harvesting lab, was certainly explained to staff. Speaking of our faceless jailers, their attacks have been getting worse lately. Three or four times a week now, with twice as many staff as there used to be. No idea where they all come from or why the attacks have increased. We tried following one of them during the day a few weeks ago, me and Sarah, wanting to see if they'd lead back to a staff room or something. Didn't seem to go anywhere though, just randomly walked through the aisles. We had to turn back before we found anything. We've been reinforcing the walls trying to arm ourselves better, certainly no lack of materials to use. Was seeming to be making more crossbows, but it's pretty slow going. Too bad Ikea doesn't sell guns. Note, no new personnel have entered SCP-3000's native site ██████ in the time span indicated in this entry. The attacks are getting bad now, almost every night, and with so many staff the bodies almost pile high enough for others to climb the walls. I think we're in real trouble here. Exchanges? I think exchange is done. We got hit pretty bad last night. Not many casualties, but the wall is wrecked. We finally figured out why the attacks have been escalating too. A box of supplies had a chunk of one of the staff in there. No idea how it happened, but apparently a piece of one will draw them as well as a full body. Too late now in any case, there's too many bodies for us to haul away, and still have time to fix the wall before night. Candids had called a meeting. I suspect there would be a talk of abandoning an exchange. Maybe try and get shelter at checkouts or something. It's already getting late though. I don't think we'll have time to make it. Maybe some of us will. I was fine for that first week out in the dark after all, but then how often can I keep getting lucky? I'm only writing this for a sense of closure, I guess. For me, or for anyone who finds this. If this is the final entry here, I hope whoever is reading this is doing so from outside this place. My biggest fear, if I do die tonight, I'll just wake up here again in the morning. Note, this is the last entry. It is assumed that while attempting to reach the checkout settlement, he was separated from the rest of his group by a pursuing SCP-3008-2 instance and happened upon the exit.