 If, on the other hand, I look at her and I'm hit by this emotion and my tone, the look in my eye, the expression on my face carries with it that message, that attraction. And I'm not getting that back if I see that she feels a little bit uncomfortable for whatever reason. Maybe she's not attracted to me. There's tons of women who aren't attracted to me. It's more personal taste. It's more the smell of your body, the sense you give off tons of scientific studies about that, more about what kind of mood she's in, more about her current relationship status, how are days going? For whatever reason, I'm getting that discomfort back, that hesitancy back, shutting it off completely. The last thing you want to do is make anyone feel uncomfortable just as a human being, just as a basic courtesy to other human beings. And so I'm going to get back to Plotonic. It's very nice to meet you, like I would any friend, right? And this goes throughout the entire process, which I'll soon be demonstrating, because different people have different boundaries. Maybe a woman who's attracted to you would love to hold your hand, right? Maybe she's not ready to kiss on a first date or on a first meeting. Maybe she's down to kiss on the first meeting. But she doesn't want to go any further than that. And so the entire time, I'm going to be expressing myself and then reading, okay, where's this other person at? You need both sides of it. So when it comes to getting more physical, starting with the feeling in your body, it shouldn't be that difficult. Once again, all the times when you've gotten closer to a woman, when that physical thing just kind of happened and you look back, oh, wait, what did I do? How did that happen? It's really simple. When two people are attracted to each other, when two people are speaking and these feelings are coming up for them and they're looking in each other's eyes and communicating on that deeper level, I mean, the only level of communication that really matters when it comes to human communication, then there's going to be an almost magnetic pull. Actually, it could probably be exactly a magnetic pull towards each other. They're just drawn towards each other. They just want to be closer because there's nothing in the world that would be more appealing to those people at that point in time. So underneath it all, getting closer to someone, getting more physical with someone is simply that natural expression of, I want to be close to you, I just want to touch you, I just want to feel your skin against mine because nothing would feel more amazing right now. Second you get in your head, oh wait, should I put my arm around her? Should I hold her hand? Suddenly it feels awkward, suddenly it feels anxious. That goes away. She no longer wants you near her. So I'm going to be walking you through some ways to kind of slowly build up that expression of I want to be closer to you with respect to the other person's boundaries, but keep in mind that this isn't some sort of, well step by step do 1A then 1B. This is simply the ways that I've found that when I'm attracted to someone, that when I have that feeling of, oh man, I just want to be near you, that I've expressed myself physically. It's my desire combined with my personality, what feels best for me. If you're not doing what feels best for you, it's not going to feel good for her. If you're doing what feels best for you in that moment, it's probably going to feel good for her as well, as long as you're reading her the entire time. So to help me demonstrate the ways that I get closer to someone when I feel that attraction, I'd like to welcome my friend up to the stage. Quick introduction is incredible. She's the founder and CEO of a company that pairs American investors with African startups. Brilliant and fortunate to have her up here assisting me today. So once again, it starts with that feeling in your body. It starts with that natural desire. It starts with feeling that, coming back from her and feeling that kind of magnetic attraction that you might have for the other person. So there's no secret, there's no magic to it. The first thing you want to do, you just want to get closer. More exciting it feels, the better and the closer you get, the more those feelings start to spike. It's natural human condition and when you're in a loud environment such as a bar or a club, you've got an added bonus. You've got an added benefit, loud music. Anyone who says, oh, it's too loud in those places. They don't understand how attraction works because it gives you an easy excuse to get closer to someone. They can't hear you. That just means get closer. It doesn't mean yell. And as you get closer to someone, those natural feelings come out more. And it should be, once again, you've got this magnetic pull towards each other. You just want to get closer and closer so that every single time you might get a little bit closer on a date or anything that's so funny, the overall distance just kind of closes a little bit more and a little bit more. And you don't have to do anything fancy because when you're feeling this, every little touch carries that feeling much more strongly. So if I lean in and our arms graze against each other, that's just going to have more electricity to it. That's going to feel as good as anything in the world could possibly feel. She's got her arms down at her side and I lean in and our hands touch. Oh, my goodness. Hands have a lot of nerve endings in them. So if I lean in and our hands graze, not only will that send that electricity through our bodies, but I'm also going to get to gauge where she's at with this whole physical contact thing. If I lean in and our hands graze and she gets a little bit uncomfortable, she gets a little bit closed up, I'm going to realize that, okay, maybe she was being friendly, maybe she's just kind of naturally flirtatious and sexual, but she doesn't want to get physical with me. Cool. How's that going? But if on the other hand I get closer and our hands graze and she's still there, she still seems to enjoy it, she's not moving her hand, then I can assume she might enjoy a little bit more. Holding hands is the best. Holding hands is great. Those nerve endings joining with that feeling, it just kind of maximizes. It just kind of blows everything up to another level, and you never want to stay completely in so blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, because then it's just going to start to feel a little bit overwhelming, and you never want to keep your distance because then those feelings can never build. There has to be both poles present, there has to be intensifying, and there has to be a little bit of a break in that. So I'll be getting closer, I'll be able to read how close, how physical she wants to get through the hands, through our shoulders, and everything else, especially the feeling, you've got to maintain the feeling. Now, if this is all going well, if we're with each other, she's clearly very comfortable with the situation, she's flirting back. By the way, that's all flirting is if you've ever been confused. All flirting is speaking to someone else, with that feeling in your body, with that sexual tone. It doesn't matter what you say, you can flirt with someone talking about breakfast. What do you have for breakfast today? Oh yeah, I love pancakes, my favorite. Words don't matter, I never did. Only thing that matters is the feeling. Being receptive so far, getting closer, pulling back, hands are all good. Another thing that I might move towards is my hand on her hip. Hips are a very sensitive area. If a woman feels comfortable with your hand on her hip, it's very much just going to raise the tension, raise the energy even more. Once again, how do I do it? How do I touch if you're thinking that you're doing it wrong? The only thing that matters is what feels best for you, what is going to feel the most amazing for you in that moment while paying close attention to how she feels as well. So I'm getting closer, talking, spawning, hands on the hips, bodies getting closer to one another, and when you're right here, when you're at that point, and you're looking at each other's eyes, it's almost impossible for a kiss not to happen right here. We're friends. Another big round of applause from my place to getting sexual, right? Because once again, nine times out of ten, I've gotten myself to the point where I can kind of close my eyes and bring it up. And keep in mind, like what you saw up here on the stage is a pale shadow, like when there's a woman that we are really connected and we're really jiving, I mean it's going to be like this times ten, right? In terms of answering your question, I would say it depends on the person.