 Let's kanli bada heads and let us pray. Father in heaven, we bless your name this moment. The Bible says where two or more are guarded in your name. You are in the amist. We are more than two. We are more than three. With the eye of faith we see you in this auditorium. And across the world as audience are watching via the internet. Please, let this evening be unique. Speak to us at the point of our needs. Take me out of flesh and put me in the spirit. Please, not I, but Christ. Be honored love and exalted. Not I, but Christ. Be seen, be known, and be heard. Not I, but Christ. In every look and action, not I, but Christ. In every thought and word, in Jesus name, amen. Please, be seated. I changed the caption just few minutes to the session. So if there is any change in the already dispatched flyer. Our subject today, the parts two of yesterday's session is yesterday we dealt with faulty family foundations. Whom shall I marry? The parts two ought to give us a solution. So I title it fixing flawed family foundation subherding traits of the right spouse. Traits of the right spouse. Anybody who wants to marry, you are looking for practical characteristics of a good spouse. We are about to have a long night today. As I always do, it was Jesus Himself who said, If you continue in my words, then you are my disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth. And the truth shall set you free. If the son sets you free, you will be free indeed. You can say an amen out there. That's the weak one. You can say a hearty amen out there. I made you four promises. Promise number one is the Bible is going to be the bedrock of our study. The reason is the Bible means what it says and says just what it means. Promise number two, you are going to be enlightened irrespective of who you are. Promise number three, you are going to be challenged to make the most important decision of your life. And promise number four, your life and mine, our lives will never be the same. I want to give a brief announcement. This coming Saturday, we are going to have baptism. And any individual, men, women, boys and girls, as we study, we come to a certain conclusion and realization. There is a deficiency of spiritual health and intentionality. So God will be calling out on individuals, including on Saturday morning, for them to give their lives to be baptized and recommit to the Lord. Tomorrow morning and every other morning, 8 am Kenya time, I will be leading out in a basic Bible devotional and a prayer session. Every day of the year, I will be leading it out by the grace of God to get out with our team. Hear me? One of the dysfunctionality of the families. Many families do not have a pattern of a devotional life. So we saw it as a need every day 8 am East African time to 8 30 East African time. We avail ourself, we study the Bible briefly, then we pick up the lessons, then we spend time to pray and it's becoming a growing community. We call it uplift your morning. I invite every audience, every listener, anybody joining across the world to be part of same. Lastly, if you intend to be part of the masterclass that is going to deal in fact for the married couples, we call it laugh connect is a one year mentorship and masterclass on the concept of what we are attempting to do here. It's 2% of the detailed content how to fix a dysfunctional home. Ladies and gentlemen, there is no, let's not pretend there are crisis. There are practical, biblical and also professional ways of dealing with it, including mentoring children, raising the next generation, fixing a dysfunctional home. We call that laugh connect for couples and those who are not married, we call it not yet tied. Your knot is not yet tied, you are not yet hooked up and married and we will be willing and we are hoping that by the grace of God people transition from not yet tied to the platform of what we call the laugh connect. Anybody interested, the crew have the details, they can post it out there and we reach out to us. So I ask the camera crew or the online folks to fix that as well. I had a lot of calls and a lot of personal messages yesterday night and throughout the day. Quite a hundred number of young people you reach out to me through my social media handle and I gave you God base, God centered answers. Some of the answers are going to come as I told a couple of you during this session. As we open the pages of God's Word, I pray that God will speak to us. Yesterday I set out three key objectives to provoke us to rethink, analyze our misguided concept about dating, courting and marriage while we instead welcome God's welcome and follow God's impeccable ideal on the subject matter. Number two, to unequivokally present some practical qualities to seek in a prospective spouse, this will be answered today. And lastly, to ignite a passionate discussion that says among others that was to be in a relationship without a clear destination is the highest form of mediocrity if not a denial of faith. Fixing flawed family foundations, trades of the right spouse. I dedicate this to Susan that when Susan is grown and a generation of head caliber they will understand the Bible has offered quality irrefutable counsels on this very slippery area where the world is not sure what to even do and what to even say. May I begin by saying the Bible says he who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtain favor from the Lord. Countless millions of shattered families began with wrong dating habits. Let us sink in. The first difficulty of the family in many cases started with the wrong foundation on which the dating started. Hence I said fixing flawed family foundations in the subheading trades of the right spouse. So while family have started with shattered families started on wrong dating habits many arguably ladies and gentlemen do not understand the purpose of dating and courtship and I dare say marriage but yesterday we gave a framework for sale. The question must be asked what is it and are there right and wrong people to date? Absolutely yes. How can you know the difference? This is why we are here today. After today if you date wrongly you cut wrongly you are on your own. You are not a victim you are an accomplice in frustrating your own life and disturbing your own future. I want to make a bold statement that it is time for this generation to unlearn the wrong principles and acquire from society and to learn and apply God's true principle that will lead to happy marriages, fruitful marriages, established marriages that will lead to sustainable marriages if you permit. Everyone is fussy about the cozy, the mundane yet excessively obnoxious marriage or wedding bliss and young people are blinded, they are dreaming of their night. It is my day and it ends up in tears. Allow me to say tonight dating has not a distinctive biblical precedence. If you study the Bible no there is nothing called dating. You can't get it but since the purpose of dating or courtship is to prepare for marriage we can learn a lot about dating by knowing God's ideal concerning marriage. Our failure to descend weirdly non biblical approach of dating results in the countless heartache, heart pay and broken homes. There is the need to reteach young people a new way to date emphasizing biblical principles concerning marriage. It is interesting to state that our dating system as we have it today does not biblically prepare young people and women for marriage. The modern dating system does not trade young people to form relationships rather it trains young people to form a series of relationships and further trains them to harden themselves to the breakup of all but the current one. So they break up, they form relationships and they are excited. I've damp him, I've damp her and it is a module that is being run today. Even if there is a form of sanity this system only prepares young people for divorce. So we want to do a historical analysis of the dating concept. Dating was invented within the last 200 years or so. Dating arose out of romanticism which emphasized among others. It's a philosophical underpinning that thinks about passion rather than logic. Follow me carefully. Dating started about at least about 200 years ago. Durin the last 200 years dating is framed on a philosophical underpinning called romanticism which says don't think, just act. Don't reason, don't be logical, be sporadic and spontaneous. If you study carefully the literature will tell you. Writers such as Rocio lamented that western civilization had fallen into error of exalting reason about feeling this was the argument. Why is the world thinking instead of just acting? So based on this there was a proposal that making decisions must be based on emotions rather than intellect, hence the new dating culture. If you study the Bible if I were to have time. The Bible's way of getting married from the Hebrew society was made selection. Families usually arrange marriages as we are going to study today. Every culture may have its way. In the New Testament you will notice in the Roman society you have made selection usually arranged by families. Example Mary was bethroded to Joseph. Be it as it may there is a functional difficulty with our dating habit. Hence I say fixing flawed family foundations. All young people are looking for they want the right spouse, they want the right man, they want the right woman but the dating culture that is based on the philosophical underpinning of romanticism is not helping do the right thing. It leads to a lot of immorality. Let me give you an example. By 1950s a new morality had arrived in the world and with it came a jump from the beach of this foolishness to permissiveness. Then you see today we see the resultant. Society flaunt sex in everything. The effects are far reaching that a return to modesty would almost instantly collapse every economy of the world. Spouse is run on sex. Entertainment is run on sex. Everything is around sex. If you want it to sell you must polish it around sex. So sex sells and the concept of sex we see today originated from the theory of romanticism which exalt emotion above logic, above reason. And today sadly the young people in the Christian church are susceptible to its bewitching influence. It is in this slide the Bible says if any of you lack wisdom this you ask God. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will direct your path. Let me make a bold statement today. God is not a responsibility to direct you to the right spouse until you acknowledge him. Look at the text again. In all your ways including your boyfriend's way, your girlfriend's way acknowledge him. How will God direct your purpose, the condition to God directing your path? You must acknowledge him not in many ways, in all ways. Then you have given him the seat then he can direct your path. Finding the right spouse is very tough. So yesterday we started a journey. I want to do a recap and then dive straight. Yesterday we said step one in the process of finding the right spouse. I've decided to go and look at it quite carefully. Genesis chapter 24 verse 1 to verse 2 so we agreed that Abraham was worried and concerned about Isaac's marriage and asked Eliezer to make a covenant and an oath. So yesterday we said parents have a great role in the choice of spouses of their children. Yesterday step number two we said the Bible says Abraham said I want you to swear by the Lord the God of heaven and the God of the earth that you will not get a wife for my spouse or for my son from the daughters of the Kenanite among whom I am living but you will go to my country and go to my own relatives and get a wife for my son Isaac. Yesterday we agreed choice of spouse cannot be from any spiritual locals. So yesterday we said we need to ask the question is he or she a believer? That leads me to point number three. Genesis chapter 24 verse 5 to verse 7 the Bible says the seventh ask him what if the woman is unwilling to come back with me to this land shall I then take your son back to the country which you came from make sure that you do not take my son back there Abraham said the Lord the God of heaven who brought me out of my father's house and my native land who spoke to me and promised me on oath to your offspring I will give this land he will send his angels before you so that you can get a wife for my son from there. Yesterday we agreed we need to commit your search work which is your courtship and dating to the God of heaven it was at this end we ended yesterday our subject today fixing flawed family foundation subheading straight of the right spouse in the next slice to slide a point to point 21 I'm coming to run and give you some critical practical example from God's word before we continue let's again bother heads as we prefer that in heaven eternity is a stake for young people mentes parents fathers mothers are also studying so that we know your will so that we can guide and guide the next generation so that a new generation and legacy young people can find practical guy in seeking for a spouse and they are sure with this they will not err please give me the right word and let your spirit be heavy on the hearts that God must work on today because it is some one season of redemption and fixing a problem which is a generational problem so shall it be it is done in Jesus name amen Genesis chapter 24 verse 8 to verse 9 follow me very carefully if the woman is unwilling to come back with you then you will be released from this oath of mine only do not take my son back there so the servant put his hand under the tie of his master Abraham and swore an oath to him concerning this matter give it a thought what lesson can we learn in getting married from this the man says don't marry from here get a wife for my son and the man ask what if the woman refuse to come because at this stage they do not know which woman Abraham responded Elieza is a brilliant brilliant servant asking the right question he says this is the rule of engagement if the woman refuse to come you are released of this oath don't take my son there on this they made an oath and the man knows his framework the lesson there is this be setting on your deal breakers any time you about to get married listen Abraham says look if the woman refuse to come let there be no marriage let there be no relationship in other words everyone preparing to get married you need to know your deal breakers things when you see in a person you agree with this no matter what somebody says be setting if you do not know it reminds me of Daniel chapter 1 verse 8 the Bible says and Daniel proposed in his heart before a man shows up before a woman shows up be sure be certain on your deal breakers if this should show up I am done the relationship is not happening many young people enter relationship and they had no deal breakers or breaking variable so they tend them this way they tend they tend them this way they tend no you make an error be sure of your deal breakers if this should happen this is not happening Abraham says if the woman is not willing to go you are released lesson number 4 in fixing flawed family foundation have or be setting on your deal breakers insight number 5 look at verse 10 so watch verse 1 through to verse 9 they know the deal breakers they knew the area the woman must come from or where the woman will not come from they committed the whole set to the god of heaven Abraham was playing an active role as a parent these were all preparations before you start looking for a boyfriend or a girlfriend but in the part 3 fixing flawed family foundation now from this part after doing all the prayers and all this framework this is where the problem begins then the 7 took 10 of his master's camels and left taking with him all kinds of good things from his master he set out from Abraham and made his way to the town of Naho what is in this text for married couples or would be married couples ladies and gentlemen after you are praying after you know the framework you want to operate after you have committed your relationship issues to the god of heaven this is what you need to know make a move somebody say make a move first let me hear the young men and the old men and the married men and the unmarried men shout and say make a move no that's a weak one come on those online just tie make a move I repeat scream and say make a move yes I like the bars or the baze coming from the man some men can't even propose to our daughters their mouth is dead or are dead things happen when you propose to a woman she will say yes she will say no or she will say give me time the easiest thing to do is to propose to a woman let the men say and aim her some of you you are faint hearted you are lazy a man born in Africa you see a beautiful lady and you don't work and shake her and ask her question and give her a manifesto and she cannot sleep overnight you are afraid some of you are already thinking the way this lady listen I repeat me if I was no married there is no woman in the world that I cannot approach who are you who born doc I see you you fit the bill let me tell you Saturday I told you let me do this well then the 7th after all this his master camell and left taking with him all kinds of good things from his master he set out for Aram Naharium and made his way to the town of Neho there is no more prayer after praying and all this you need to act after all this week of prayer on family life move to your church and the lady you have always been desiring tell her now what is on your heart the Holy Spirit will back you somebody say an amen there what are you afraid of when we were in the university one of my friends came to me in the dawn it was a Thursday he came my nickname they call me only close allies they call me Saibok he say ma gah Saibok wassup my lady ma gah my sister I say so Saturday morning we went to church I went early with him and the lady was coming and he say she is the one in the red watch that's it one two three but don't ten I said okay I want ten so I am watching then they ask us to stand up opening him we gotta together immediately the organist I've seen the lady so I profiled her Tuesday we had a corporate class he was there immediately the class ended I went to say hi my name is Godswold how are you doing and I said how is your week looking like she said please may I know what I said we just want to take a drink around then I want to know you better she said really I said no come on nothing to fear she said she agreed Thursday a week after the guy told me I told my guy you are eating on me don't think about the money now think about your manifesto we went to give him rundown a whole lecture how can you fail as a son of Abraham how can you not propose to a woman and she will be thinking the whole night why won't you rent an apartment in a woman's head my guy went eating the chicken and the drink he was discussing sabasko and quoting Ellen White I was so disappointed quoting Ellen White somebody else in a month's time he proposed to the girl the girl was off now they are married he nearly died I said die die God cannot even help you die ladies and gentlemen after all the prayer and everything we are saying God will not come and propose to a woman for you please may I speak to the sisters too when you see a man you lie God says you cannot tell your intentions there are millions of ways to make it known but I will not bother you the sisters too much but ladies and gentlemen the men hear me loud if don't assume don't assume it's not every lady that is driving a car and nice and so so see and beautiful that is dating you are childish if you think that way be bold and tell your mind budgets for it three things yes no or the third one is all I'm thinking about we have gone to places we took it as a contract people said no for six months we were developing framework finally Goliath came down what are you afraid of as a man the Bible says one way you may lose your will be spouse God might have destined you she is meant for you he is meant for you but your laziness your laziness can cause a whole generation from benefiting how weak hearted can you be that you are afraid a woman will reject me and to the ladies listen to me when a man propose to you it doesn't mean that he is immoral some of you when they propose to you then you won't tell this person you tell that person he is all over the place what childish behavior is that but men budget for it they can do all they can will pull them down budget for it make a move he set out for Aram Nahiram after prayer make your intentions known if that is clear somebody say an amen out there points number six but in verse number 11 to verse 12 he had the camel kneel down near the well outside the town it was towards evening the time the women go out to draw water this is a whole inspiration on how to propose how to win a bid look at it when did he get to the town according to the text when did he get to the town it was when towards evening and what time was that come on what time was that the time women go out to do ha to draw water when I say make a move it doesn't mean you make a move anyhow we went to a friend's funeral and we went there on this weekend and my friend went to propose to a lady who's funeral the mother is dead we went for the funeral you went to propose to her how can you propose to a woman during the funeral the mother's funeral and the lady came God said I am so broken I said what is it how come he told me he was coming I am the commander in chief you go behind me the street is something you need coaching funeral you went to propose they bounce him I said you deserve it in this text what I see is success in spouse selection is related also to prudent timing so you need to check you must be sensitive to the nuances don't propose to a woman after exams the exam might have dealt with her so she can bounce you so don't propose after exams you need to check the mood of the woman or the man whatever it is it's a principle is she in a good mood is it a good time is it a good season you need to check all your contos you may have a good case but you may lose your case why a liaza arrived towards evening who was he looking for he was looking for women that was his sample group or target group so he went in the evening it was time where women go to fetch water so that he can get a huge sample to select from be wise some of you the ladies don't keep staying in your church for life sometimes leave new life go to Leventin go to somewhere else travel around it's not only base in your village church no way it's not only in Kenya your husband may came from I'm from Ghana I got married to a woman in Quez Sierra Leone but you also need to know the timing it was the timing points number seven our subject is flexing floud family foundation point number seven look at verse 12 then he prayed Oh Lord God of my master Abraham give me success today and show kindness to my master Abraham point number seven is the success or the sex success demand or demands a life of prayer there should be constant prayer so demand prayed prayed before he left got to the well at the time women were fetching water before he shot his or he will shoot his shot he prayed dear God grant me success today choosing a wife is a spiritual activity choosing a husband is a spiritual activity don't take it lightly look at point number eight see I am standing beside the spring he is speaking to God and the daughters of the townspeople are coming out to draw water he was using his brain at the right place at the right time may it be that when I say to a girl please let down your jar that I may have a drink and she says drink and I will water your camel too let her be the one you have chosen for your servant Isaac by this I will know that you have swung or shown kindness as you say to my master what is the principle there in setting for a spouse because you cannot be certainly sure it is not out of place to ask God for a sign do it from a genuine heart do it from a sincere heart do it with all honesty ask God for a sign now for the remainder of this session we are going to look out for things to look out for in a prospective spouse so I have divided it into three parts we dealt with that contour so before the journey now before you will make the request or make the proposal we also needed to put in place remember we started from five which says you need to make a move then we say number six don't just make a move in making a move you need to know the right timing after you set out in the right timing before you make your intentions known to a woman or a man please tell the Lord take char and number eight or number nine number eight you may ask God for a sign that leads me to point number nine step nine in selecting the right spouse look at verse 15 before he got finished praying God is a prayer answering God before he got finished praying heaven is interested in who you marry God is not too far from answering speedily immediately instantly it is possible before he got finished praying Rebekah came out with her jar on her shoulder she was the daughter of Betwell son of Milka who was the wife of Abraham's brother Naho the girl was very beautiful a virgin no man had ever lain with her went down to the spring field her jar and came up again ladies and gentlemen look at the text again before he had finished praying Rebekah came out if I was a certain preacher I would say may your will be spouse come out during this season wherever he is may God connect your path wherever she is may God connect your path we pray in the name of Jesus that this season somebody may locate may see their Rebekah or their rubin in Jesus name before he got finished praying Rebekah came out who was Rebekah what was she doing Rebekah came out with her jar Rebekah was not anywhere pray give me a husband give me a husband I told her yesterday she was doing her job she came out with her jar not a slack wing on her shoulder she was the daughter of Betwell son of Milka who was the wife of Abraham's brother Naho the inspiration he say this girl fit the description of Abraham now see the first thing the Bible say what was the first thing she was I did hear she was nobody should tell you step number nine look for physical beauty don't go and take any cockroach which looks like a cockroach to you and say she teaches about school well it's not enough married we don't only teach there is a physical bonding if she is not nice to you leave it the lady was very beautiful he is not handsome for you put an asterisk don't marry is not suicide don't marry and be struggling this is the Bible the Bible says if you want to marry look out for someone who is attractive if that is clear somebody say an aimer women don't let anybody guilt strip you just settle for anything settle for a handsome guy according to your definition and similarity why Genesis 24 verse 16 the girl was very beautiful before her character hear me women before we know if you are brought up well what we see first as men is your beauty so take care of your hair but also take care of the head keep your body glowing be clean when you you speak no mouth order we can't hold breath for the rest of our life in this marriage now kissing is the problem in the marriage when you finish eating chicken and fish please put a mint in your mouth brush your teeth smell nice smell good some of you the women your head have too much downtraft what do you call it you give her no the Bible says the girl was very beautiful may God grant beautiful girls to our sons and may our daughters find no spider with a bow tie may God grant them handsome husbands the girl was very beautiful if that is clear somebody scream allowed a man those of you online tie beauty stroke handsomeness if you can't spell handsomeness because you have a grammar difficulty just write beauty God will understand beauty but may I warn you is also Kirika to ask what is the content of your beauty can are you getting it the beautiful can you are saying the content is equally relevant some of the packaging they ask comes so beyond the beauty you ask the question what is in the beauty can this body that is so attractive after a while when the man knows or the woman knows you are just handsome you look good nice but you are foolish foolish things must be thrown out to ask you take care of the body the beauty can ask also for the content that leads me to point 10 Genesis 24 verse 13 to verse 14 what does the Bible say the Bible talked about this girl look at it again the girl was very beautiful after the beauty what is the next thing the Bible brings to us she was a virgin no man had ever lain with her the principle there is ask you look for beauty look also for moral purity and let the man here let me speak first to the man whenever we talk about moral purity we think it is a woman's responsibility to be chased you are mad you are mad and man is a spiritual head tomorrow I'm going to deal with that if there should be any group that should take purity and morality serious is the head the family the head of the nation I speak to men across the world myself inclusive you cannot demand moral purity when you are morally impure and impure the Bible says when you see Rebecca the first thing you see beautiful the next thing you see morally solid many men are asking the girls in the women to be physically beautiful but don't be morally beautiful or pure but ask for us this is how men are the standard for moral purity for a man is more required than a woman a man is a spiritual head the girl was very beautiful a virgin no man had ever lain with her may I state we make mistakes and sin in life there are some virgins they are worse than converted prostitutes or active prostitutes some people are dirty virgins they've not had penetrative sex but they masturbate to death is constant you are impure and it's a matter of time masturbating can give you stroke it can lead you not to enjoy your sexual life when you get married and all these nonsense about deal dose and all its bewitching influence ladies and gentlemen the bible says aside beauty God said Rebecca was morally pure so if you are dating you want to date when he is nice the next thing you look out for what is his moral character please don't take it for granted girls hear me whatever a man would do during your dating time is going to do 10 times when you are married so when it's morally ampere 20% expect 200% of moral impurity when you marry him demand it demand it and let me state it again any man who sleeps with a woman before he marries her in his mind another man can sleep with that woman the man will not tell you so you are dating and he is sleeping with you guess what he will never trust you when he is not around he will not just say it but in his mind you are not correct and to demand this is the reason why they have insecurity issues God has made marriage not to be so canvasom if we follow his principle look for beauty but after looking for beauty look for moral purity please moral purity includes kissing leaking all forms of impure acts hear me la and hear me clear God is not a man we cannot manipulate God do you want God to guide you to find your spouse do you want God to guide you to find the right woman and the right man if yes listen to him surrendering to God like yesterday we talk about I will follow what he is saying in the days of ignorant that's why I said this Saturday there will be baptism act says God at wink now he has called men everywhere that they should repent the past may be gone beginning this week beginning today you tell yourself I am on a journey of moral purity if that is close somebody say an amen out there please me to step number 11 Genesis 24 15 to verse 16 look at the text very carefully the girl was very beautiful the first trait beauty physical attraction to averaging moral compass no man had ever lain with her three she went down to the spring filled her jar and came up again so see what God is saying if you want to marry look for physical beauty God says you need it number 2 look for moral compass you need it the next thing you need is work ethics look for diligence in work another way to say it is work ethics if you are in school and the young man will always come to class to copy people's work don't marry him you be a thief very lazy these days the men they don't want to work go to the universities the first class students women men are falling down down down down down you cannot be lazy as a man everybody who believes the Sabbath six days you shall work and do all your labor the seventh day is the Sabbath of the Lord anybody who believes in the Sabbath must be productive Sunday, Monday, Tuesday Wednesday, Thursday, Friday work hard you cannot enjoy the Sabbath if you are lazy lazy on WhatsApp lazy on TikTok lazy on Facebook please work work be lazy man who marries a lazy man you do it to your perio and don't let any man dim your lights a man is lazy he is not working he is not progressing and he is demanding the woman must come to my level he is not your type guys let's elevate the journey look it may take time for we to get money but one thing should be clear he is not a lazy man that is enough and some women are very lazy they want to live soft life they behave like charged electrons they know the good things in life the only problem is they don't know how to get it listen success is not sexually transmitted success is not sexually transmitted if you want to marry look for someone who is diligent at work please did I say he must be rich did I say that what did I say the bible in god in his wisdom said look at rebecca physically beautiful morally might and work ethics very hard working girl she went down to the spring fulgeja came up again repeating the process reproducing reproducing work ethics check it out he may not be the best student but one thing you know he may be slow student he may be a c student but this guy is steady this guy submit a cement on tie this guy listen they are indicators watch out in case you are forgetting if you are watching out for you must be it yourself let me say it again all you are watching out for you must be it yourself you can't be lazy in looking for hardworking man you be unequally yuked you can't be immoral and be looking for pure people unequally yuked don't kill somebody's daughter or somebody's son our subject today fixing flawed family foundations subherding traits of the right spouse step number 12 watch it carefully verse 17 the 7th harrid to meet her and said please give me how much water can't talk to me give me how much water a little water from your jaha do you know what give rebecca a husband look at it very carefully what did she say verse 18 she says well drink my law she said quickly low weather jar to her hands and gave him a drink he travel about 500 miles there was no quota he was dusty he was dirty he was dust bathed stranger this was her character watch to this girl please give me water she didn't behave like ganyan girls or kenyan girls they watch you up and down and throw their eyes then you know your level the next lesson is ketsi look out for ketsi look at this girl can i get a water to drink i'm ketsi she says oh sir please have water can i get water to drink i was going for a naming ceremony one sunday morning my phone was off so i lost the google direction thing and i saw a nice girl and i was honking then i rolled down the glass and i asked please madam sister she watched me like this and she left you know she thinks i have a sickness she's my solution but i have no sickness i'm taking care of well we went to the baby's naming ceremony and i saw her appearing i'm the preacher oh my god if it was Nigerian film it to sound or Ganyan film then i asked the couple who is she the man said it's my brother's girlfriend good i called him don't marry her she was rude she was disrespectful she was she was the epitome of disrespect hear me they ask rebecca a little water you know what may give you your destined husband a little ketsi a little good morning a little sir a little please a little patience a little carefulness you do not know who you are in a public vehicle with you do not know who you are in that meeting with you just do not know please ladies and gentlemen a woman cannot fall you know when boys go ladies will be coming keep and fall and guys are screaming they are laughing no way i told susan i told her i'm sure susan is watching susan i told you any man who laughs at you and tease you join others to tease you don't be his friend ketsi sometimes the way we talk to women and some of you delayed it listen your money go to your house with it please don't bring it here don't bring it here for the fact that you are a boss and you are in a workplace and you command men keep it there don't bring it to us here some of you the way you are carrying yourself it will take you years what level of arrogance is this is against the christian ethos the bible says the nesting god says rebecca qualifies to become the grandmother of jesus she was ketios ketios in little things little things little things little things you are on the road and then just a little care a little decency a little ketsi look out for ketsi when a man is not ketios to you today when you marry him he will never be ketios to you when a woman is disrespectful to you today she will be disrespectful time 6 million be careful look out for ketsi i repeat everything you are looking out for you yourself must well be the 13th point watch it carefully verse 19 after she had given him a drink she said this was her initiative i would draw water for your camels too until they have finished shrinking wow she was not asking she chose this is a christian this is a woman this is a man worth marrying this is the character of extra mile extra mile they just ask for a little water and you know the permutation 10 camels plus or minus the latest of water camels are going to drink camels are mean when they are to laugh when they are to frown they laugh water is their fuel they travel about 500 miles or kilometers and they have come from Canaan so they were thirsty they drank 10 camels she says i would draw water for your camels until they are done it will not take minutes it will take hours but she elated to do it herself when you want to say yes to a man watch out for extra mile an extra mile may mean i need 500 shillings data and he sends 600 can i get impensa transfer for this and is considerate that they will take charges so we add some these are basic things you watch out for for extra mile please the Christian must be the best husband and the best wife all we are talking about we are not talking money we are not talking basic principle if a man is having this and let me talk to the old men and women some of you don't want your sons to be married to some individuals because they don't have money and those of you watching online some of you the men because of your family standing you feel you profile people and say this one is not good money you think life is all about money my mother in law Mrs. Vandy when i was going to marry some other i asked her in private what are you looking for in a son in law remember i was 26 years she looked at me and smile and said i need three things i need a godly man i need a man who knows how to work hard but also know how to work smart she never mentioned money she's looking from some ideal listen money will finish but if the person has certain moral standing i'm not just talking about spirituality i'm talking about work ethics are you getting the point money can look you can lose all your money but if you have these characteristics you can rebuild and become all the best you possibly can be i want to hear an amen in this regard amen look out for the character of this drama watch it so she quickly emptied the jar into the trow run back to the well to draw more water and drew enough for all i don't want to talk about her agility she was not working sluggishly she was not working as if she was doing anybody a favor she was doing it from the debt of her heart this is a wife no wonder god chose her to be the grandmother of jesus look for her heart look at it she ran back draw more water drew enough for all his camels i say the man you want to marry or the woman must have a heart of service even for outcasts outcasts are sensitive to animals not just animals this is not a pet it's a camel they smell they are weird their teeth are brown camels are not take a camel to mean a car tight traveling on the road all the dust will be in its belly where this girl was thinking of a camel if a girl can't think of a camel she can't think of the mother in law if a boy can't think of a camel a man can't think of a camel you think about the father in law please the old men and women when your daughters are making choices watch out watch out for what inspiration are stated these are indicators lesson 15 without saying a word the man watched her closely to learn whether or not the law had made his journey successful this is a critical point hear me when you now find the dreamer and you now see that dream lady you now feel he is the one she is the one what is that your attitude when you are getting it right closely analyze development do it in silence some of you we check your status we just know who are your boyfriends you are all over the place hey keep quiet don't post on social media what do you do without saying a word I should have highlighted that without saying a word the man watched closely watch closely to learn has God indeed answered my prayer so when he is doing all the right things my boo my boo listen then the relationship can be 10 beans in West Africa we say 10 beans the thing has gotten out of hand you are broken up then the whole world is aware then the first, the second, the third, the fourth she did this one you are stopping please next time when you are dating it is going well sir closely analyze development don't go about learn from Elia without saying a word the man watched her closely our subject for this moment fixing flawed family foundation these principles when we pick them up you can be sure the next generation will be better than our generation look at this one verse 22 this one is going to get a little tough God give me the wisdom to say it nicely read it with me let's read it together let's go so it was when the cameras had finished drinking that the man took a golden nose ring weighing half a shekel and two bracelets for her wrist weighing 10 shekels of gold I can explain the theological underpinning it was a cultural norm but this is the principle when did the man give the girl a gift when did he come on when did he give the girl a gift after what the camels had won finished drinking the man took a golden nose ring weighing half a shekel and two bracelets for her wrist weighing 10 shekels of gold the principle I learned there is scout for an attitude of gratitude in generosity don't marry any man that is close-fisted they don't give some women they only receive give me give me some girls are dating guys they have never given gifts you just know them they only know how to receive the bible says it's more blessed to give than to receive some men they will never give shamelessly receiving from your girlfriend don't you have shame it's not just giving look at it I used to word the bible says so it was when the camels had finished drinking in this is an act of gratitude he was saying what in 2024 in Nairobi in Africa in the world today please please this is a token please any time you are dating don't date somebody who is close-fisted if he is not going listen if you are dating him I'm not saying plenty money I'm coming to calculate how much what he gave is worth but it's a principle just give me when I was dating she came to Ghana 2009 or 2008 I noticed my damn girlfriend was not having a laptop her friends were all over the place but she was quite content with life so I watched her when she was living I was 24 I bought a brand new laptop she didn't ask her pen drives things necessary for her to make her university work easier so that no minister the ministers were competing with me they were big guys with deep pockets the guys I'm just preaching the guys have too much cash I took her for shopping she left Ghana with one thing in mind this guy is a good guy who are too close-fisted give sir give ew it's a shame give it must not be plenty but give when you are coming back from some just give no you only receive listen what did he give took a golden nose ring let me go back the man took a golden nose ring weighing half a shekel take note of that and two bracelets for her wrist weighing 10 shekels of gold this doesn't mean on a mental jewelry is no this is a culture of thing and I can break it and remember these were not the covenant people but Abraham 7D research and knew that this is the culture of my master's plays so he was ready this has nothing to do with that issue let me just give a disclaimer now 50 shekels of gold 0.5 kilograms of gold today follow me one kilogram of gold today sells at 65,622 dollars so by extension half a kilo of gold today is 32,811 dollars follow me what the text half a shekel so let's go back 50 shekel of gold is 0.5 kilogram of gold so one kilogram of gold today we saw it so 0.5 kilogram of gold today is selling at 32,811 US dollars now 10 shekels of gold is one fifth of 50 shekels of gold so 32,811 thousand dollars one fifth is 20 percent so 20 percent of that is 6,526 dollars so the 10 shekels of gold that they gave the girl in today's term is 6,526 US dollars a gift this is what the big boys are competing with and you can't even buy you can't even buy apple apple or orange how can you survive in this market you can't even buy apple why? one shekel of gold is 652 kilograms US dollars so half a shekel of gold is 218 dollars 74 cents so the total gift Eliaza gave Rebecca was 6,526 118 dollars which is 6,744 US dollars if you are in Kenya you multiply it by 149,145 or 150 then you get a shilling equivalent ladies and gentlemen he was not cheap he came expensive we may not have this today because if you finish graduate school you are not working you can't afford this but the principle is women after you have been given your camels are finished drinking show appreciation be a woman who is a gratitude centered woman a generous guy don't just gloss over goodness of others when somebody is doing something mention it boldly show gratitude any ingrate is not becoming your husband or your wahai I repeat any woman who would demonstrate ingratitude don't put on a steric man and the question is you yourself are you that I'm about wrapping it up look at verse number 22 verse number 23 I should say after all this man ask the girl who's daughter are you tell me please is there room in your father's hall for us to lodge my interest is in the first question when you are dating a guy or you want to date a girl you want to cut a guy you want to form a relationship don't go every night you are on the phone Nancy I love you James I am dying for you Nancy I can't sleep because of you James you will kill me Nancy every day you are not asking relevant question the man ask who's daughter are you the meaning is ask him or her needful and thoughtful question example which type of women excite you please stop the pretence let's be real do you like slim girls do you like girls with body you tell me what made you not married at this time what broke up your previous relationships you will be drawing some parallels but you see you gloss over it is just about let's go and take chicken let's do this let's have some fun foolishness ask needful question how old is your boyfriend 2 years since telling me maybe around I said get out how can you tell me 2 years now you are coming to cry how old is your boyfriend maybe about 2 years you date a man you don't know his age what were you doing throughout the 2 years what siblings is your boyfriend having you don't know are you mad so what do you talk about are we in love you need to ask ask needful question if you were to be married how many kiss will you like to have and why at what age will you wish that we get married talk about career and finances what is his philosophy about money what is his philosophy ask question when we are married I am telling you you need to enroll for a master class I am damn serious when we are doing there are some 22 questions the questionnaire over about 200 questions when you finish analyzing it some of you will show red card to your boyfriend this guy is a chaff useless ask needful question roles in the marriage when you are married what are the roles what am I expecting from a man what is his framework about a working wife you need to know so when dating or about today ask relevant question you need to know the size of the decision you are about to make we can fix the flawed family foundation 2 months ago she answered him and said I am the daughter of Bectwell the son of milka bought to naho and she added we have plenty straw and folder as well and room for you to spend the nahi she was again thinking about the camels then the man bowed down and worshiped the law saying praise to the lord the god of my master Abraham who has not abandoned his kindness and faithfulness to my master ask for me listen to him the lord has let me on the journey to the house of my master's relatives ladies and gentlemen the principle in the 18 step is prayer should characterize every progress the man is progressing and he kept praying 19 then what happened the girl ran and told her mother's household about this things what has happened they gave you $6500 and all this you keep it to yourself listen when you are dating somebody or you are looking out for his or her confidentiality barometer there are things she needs not to tell anybody there are things she must tell the parent so you now need to ask who is she talking to she told the whole family listen I met a man he was good to me he was responsible if you are a boyfriend and your girlfriend is not or has not hinted the parent about you your own probation if he can't tell his relatives about you myself and her we are starting to see if we could marriage each other is listen you need to know who look out for his or her confidentiality barometer then the 20th point I want to pull to you today is now Rebekah had a brother named Laban and he hurried to the man on the spring look out for family interests watch out is the family interested in you we went to a place with a friend and we were eating and drinking fufu-sup my friend was eating too much now he finished and he asked for more then I was scanning because I told him don't go there alone we need to go so that we would test the pulse when you are so madly in love you don't think you are stupid so when we are not stupid we will put our thinking caps on so that we can pick signals for you the guy was just eating and talking plenty and the sisters in law they stood at the gate like this and they were doing like this oh which in law is this no shame see the way he is eating you've not given money for them to cook ketsi and you are eating as if you are the landlord oh watch out for family interests if the mother knows you are dating do they check up on you once a while do they look out for you you are the lady now your boyfriend has told the parent about you do they even care about your well being don't take it for granted watch out all these when this was done they finally got married was there any special benefit chapter 67 of chapter 24 Isaac brought care into the tent of his mother Sarah don't go and take your wife and take your mother's room and he married Rebecca so she became his wife and he loved her and Isaac was comforted after his mother's death oh marriage is not bad young people please it's possible to love somebody and guess what when life hits you ha they are the ones that are going to be the shield and comfort during life's storms Isaac loved her and Isaac was comforted after his mother's death Sarah's death did not shock Isaac why Rebecca was in his life I don't want to deliver the point but allow me to ask some few questions ladies we will analyze this deeper but we can't do it look every man who wants to marry or who is already married answer the following questions number one will I study her reaction to know who is a good man you need to project will I study her reaction a man must ask himself physically mentally and emotionally hopes and dreams to me are you capable that a woman can look at you and tell you this is my aspiration you have created a platform the girl is so confident to tell you a lot of stars will I always demonstrate my affection not expecting her to take my love for granted there is a way a man must carry himself and you can be jovial but nobody can take it for granted I will laugh but you must build a personality in a way the way you carry yourself jovial, very social but nobody can take your love and your personality for granted men must ask themselves this question will I try to see things from her perspective as well as my own to avoid becoming set in my ways is either my way or no other way especially a choleric individuals no calm down she is a human being with her head listen to her too can I lead interesting discussions of important issues without it ending in an argument a man must develop the capacity to do this if we do have a misunderstanding or a pervish outburst of irritation will I put it behind us settling the difficulty one way or the other or will I suck upon inviting the problems to return always guilt stripping no no that is a root a red flag or a red story building will I make allowances for irritability brought about through over kindness in a build up of little house annoyances pretending not to notice it like I told you your daughter will pull the suit down and you are in and she is giving you attitude no you need to know that something is wrong somewhere can you handle this without it turning into a fight again will I inspire her and take an interest in her hobbies and in her more ambitious ambitious ventures that are necessary for her happiness some men are threatened by the advances God created her with a star with a certain unique impact she must make in the world don't become an enemy and because of your weak personality you want to rub her down and dim her lie allow her you may have a first degree she may have a PhD but she must respect there is a way to handle it and it can be fine don't will you be that husband I take an interest in her clothes show her my appreciation and pay her the little compliment and the attention that I did in our courting days all the men are telling her the nice things and only you they must beg and make an altar call before you say for once this atta is nice which man are you will her life be enriched her interest brother and her happiness and general well being increased by marrying me can this lady you want to date or marry can she become better just by marrying you No. 10 for the men the last one will I keep loving her as the years roll by and changes of child become glaring and age having each toll on her she is to have a flat tummy project after 4 5 kids or 3 when the breast is now dropping the stomach is now different sir will you still love this girl that is looking like a rose flower today let me ask the women their question and we bring it to a close to any woman who is here or will be wife here and answer the following will I help him to achieve a full alive by constantly endeavoring to broaden our horizon don't become a Jezebel because you are a wife will you marry this man making me a better person will I use tacts and sympathy which is little personal problems and help him understand himself your husband has 25% weaknesses and you have you have succeeded in making him look like he is the worst man in the world nothing good can come out of him will I use tacts sympathy which is little personal problems and help him understand himself man have ego you need wisdom to deal with the man with the double ego that is not converted will I study him and get a clear idea of all the little things that make him happy and confident some women you have broken the confidence span of your husband and some of you the girls the way you handle yourself because of your cheap 1, 2 by 4 IQ you think you are on top of the world you run every man down you speak every man down the question is if you want to marry this man the question as a woman if I marry him can I study my boyfriend can I study my husband and have a full idea who he is what makes him happy what makes him confident every time we are done eating Samola will tell you thank you for providing thank you for paying the school fees thank you for doing this ladies and gentlemen Jezebel you killed the men and they have no confidence in them are you one will I share with him my little joys and successes and let him realize how much he contributes to my happiness all it may take is to be talking to a friend and tell them look if not because of my husband I will not be who I am today you are telling him indirectly and he is saying he appreciates who I am what I am contributing will I overlook little irritabilities due to overwork and fatigue pretending not to notice them making allowances for the strain that the workplace can be and the responsibility of a family life can bring sometimes the men come and they are just tired those of you will be getting married he will just be angry sometimes you just ignore them Johnson or God's will please I am going to take a shower please the food is on the table I have set it up just let me know alright you don't want to go into any banter so you are wise will I see that he has enough time for relaxation and quiet thought sometimes the women the attention you need is like you are now trying to say everything is not about you before you he was once living even the woman who gave birth to him is not asking so much like you please can you give him space he is also a human being sometimes listen the men don't want any sexual they don't want any thing they just want to be there they want to have a piece of mind take away your thing he wants to sleep and think he is having difficulty you don't kick you out give him some time to be on his own when my feelings arouse and out of proportion you are angry due to misunderstanding will I always try to better understand him our mutual relationship and myself suspending hash judgment with thoughtful self inquiry women use your brains sometimes you look at the thing and answer yourself and don't even ask a question have I noticed any mannerism in myself that may be irritating to him there are things you do that getting so angry they are like his forgotten the technique triggers you do this and he is like a mad man will you use your brain and know those triggers number nine will I let him enjoy women's company without undue suspicion I covered it and jealousy encouraging him to be sociable and helping him to find natural or to have fun and be at ease but this is not for every man so when you allow them you have eternal psychics on your head so you need to watch out on that one a caution after I have a daughter so caution sometimes the men just want to be themselves but the father he is talking to a young lady doesn't mean they have anything in common please will I allow him have an evening of some time and not rely on or demand constant companionship Dana was playing soccer 2010 before we married just 30 days for us to marry to play a game it was a Wednesday I love to watch soccer if it's not on the Sabbath then Samola came choose between the Ghana match or me I look at my then girlfriend and say I have chosen Ghana I can be mean I have chosen Ghana from that day she has learnt her lesson if I am going to watch soccer I recall one day Susan was a girl I think less than 2 years we carried her midnight my wife followed me we went to watch together she just want to be in your company I told her yesterday I have got my area covered so sometimes the men just want to be alone lastly women ask yourself will I cherish love and remain faithful to him in case he get bald and physically chalik if his stomach is now like 8 month pregnancy and he is all like a round football will you still love him I am not making an altar call I just want to pray a prayer but I am tempted to say somebody should look at this if you are dating answer the following in my current love relationship we are mostly idle we are dating and cutting without a focus looks is only the glue his or her talent is what is keeping us his or her financial stability is what is keeping me there tick as many as applied in my current love relationship I feel depressed I get angry or jealous I am there because I am growing old I am there because people will not take me serious if this relationship also fails in my current love relationship we are always quarreling we are constantly dishonoring continuous the law we are cohabiting we are not married but staying together we are discovering the purpose of our existence which phase or what is happening in your current relationship in my relationship I wish no one will ever discover that I I got this concept from Prastaba Lisa sir in my current relationship I wish no one will ever discover that I what is it about your current relationship that you wish no one will ever discover in my relationship I know Jesus dislike my what is it about your relationship that the Lord Jesus dislikes if Jesus really wants to change something in my relationship I would want him to start with what is the first thing you wish Jesus would change about your marriage or your relationship after that first one what things will follow lastly may God for be but if I happen to miss heaven because of my relationship it will mostly be due to my I close with the story of the man by name Hudson Taylor the life of this guy teaches the value that God must guide who marries you Taylor was an English missionary who died in 1910 after spending more than 50 years as a missionary in China when he went there in 1854 nearly 380 million people in the country's vast interior had never seen a Westerner nor heard the name of Jesus but with Taylor at the time Taylor was living China 205 preaching stations were established 849 missionaries were installed 125,000 Chinese had surrendered their lives to Jesus he wielded such a spiritual power even today the ripple effect of the life of Godson Taylor cannot be told he made an impact but there was a tiny story that was recorded about Taylor that when Taylor was living England Taylor left behind his unfinished medical studies to be a missionary and he had a girlfriend he wanted to marry Adatai and he told the girlfriend will you follow me to China God has called me for a job in China she said I will not go Taylor was in China God tested Taylor when he made him choose between God's will and his own desires that they came in Taylor's life when he got to decide if it was important to be in God's will or just to be married the choice was God's choice or a good choice the girl in England was a good girl nice girl, intelligent girl but it doesn't mean she was God's choice I submit to you today in the choice of who you marry don't choose a good husband a good wife it must be God's choice every choice from God will be good but not every good man will be God's choice for your life I repeat choose God's choice it is better than a good choice he may be a banker he may be a politician he may be a lecturer he may be a decent girl she may be an engineer she may be a fashion designer a good girl but the question is this evening anybody here who want to say I want God's choice not a good choice just raise your hand nobody is coming here just raise your hand those online I want a good man but I want him to be God's choice I want a good woman but God's choice just die tonight it's been a long journey how I pray it to stay with us forever we want to fix the flaw family foundations we pray for every young man every young woman who is in Kwadmire who is in a state of contemplation and India bears its son not knowing who to choose not knowing how to choose today through your word you've given us guidelines principles and variables to consider I pray today may the records read after today a new generation of Africans of believers of Christians of Muslims and agnostics pick up this Bible principle and they will never make a mistake again in their choice of spouse may the failures of our forebearers not be the portion of this generation may God guide our daughters may God lead our sons may God direct our sisters may God be the champion over the decisions of our brothers may no body be entertained and ties deceived by the devil to marry nearly a good person and not God's choice so I say today may the Lord bless you and keep you may the God of heaven lift up his face upon you and be gracious unto you and may God cause you to meet the right person sooner than later it is done because we have asked in Jesus name