 What are the reasons why this happens and what can you do about it? So the first reason that this happens is because a lot of guys think that you're going to put them into the friend zone. And so the situation that this woman was talking about was going on dates and then this guy, she doesn't hook up with a guy and the guy goes on to the next flavor for like the candy shop next flavor. And so here's the thing. One of the biggest fears that men have, one of their biggest frustrations, one of their biggest annoyances, one of their biggest fears is that they end up in the friend zone a lot with women. And if he doesn't play his cards right, he'll end up in the friend zone almost all the time. And so he needs to make sure that he is creating a situation that leads to physical intimacy, or there's a really high probability chance that it's never going to lead to physical intimacy, that you're going to friend zone him and that he's going to be like, Oh, well, now we're just friends. And this is never going to get into the place that I wanted to get to. And so most men know this. And so they will try to push things towards a romantic, physically intimate relationship as soon as possible, because the sooner it gets there, the higher the probability that it will ever get there for him. And the slower that he does it, the less likely it will ever end up in a romantic situation for him. And so what happens a lot of times is that women will end up just saying no to the guy, right and denying his advances and pushing him away and being like, no, no, no, no, let's not do that. Or they'll say, you know, Hey, let's just be friends first. Can't we just be friends first? Right, which is code word to a guy of saying, you're never getting anywhere with me. You're going to be one of my orbiters forever. And it's going to be really painful for you because you're going to really like me. And you're not going to get anywhere. And so you're stuck in the friend zone. Good luck with that, buddy. And the problem with that, if you actually are interested in having a romantic relationship is that he feels that he's going to get stuck there. And so a lot of times most men that are looking for something romantic will end up getting out of that completely, leaving and not pursuing any kind of a relationship with you at all, because he doesn't want to get stuck in that position wasting time, money, resources, because a lot of women out there, you have to realize a lot of women will just go on dates because they're bored, right? Some guy comes and talks to him. She's not really that interested in him, but she's like, well, I've got nothing else going on. He's going to pay for dinner and pay for drinks and take me out. And it'll be far more interesting than sitting at home and watching how I met your mother reruns. And so I'll go out with him, not because I'm interested in anything real with them, but because I'm bored out of my mind. And so a lot of women will go and do this, right? And guys know that women do this. And so he needs to make sure that it's leading towards something that he wants or he will use and waste a huge portion of his time, money and resources and energy chasing after something that's going nowhere. And so if you want something different with him, then what you have to do is you have to you have to dangle the carrot. You have to make sure that he knows that this is moving towards something real. And so what you have to do is when you set your boundary, when you stop him, and you're like, hey, no, you know, instead of it being like I had this distinction between like a hard rejection and a soft rejection, a hard rejection is when you're like, no, I'm not interested. This is not going anywhere. Stop, get away from me. I'm done. Right. And a soft rejection is like, not right now, like maybe later, maybe I'll be interested later, maybe some other time, maybe another date, maybe another time, right? And so what you want to do is you want to have soft rejections. If you're dating a guy and you want him to continue to pursue you, but you're not ready for what he wants right now because you're still figuring out what he wants, you're still figuring out whether you like him, you're still figuring out whether he's got red flags and whether he's toxic or what's going on with him. And so you're not ready quite yet to allow him into your receive him in this kind of way yet. And so what you want to do is just let him know that you're still interested in being and what you want to say is yes, you know, like I'd love to do that with you. I'm just not ready to do that yet. When you do that, what you're basically saying is that you still got a chance, right? There's still a chance. So that's number one. He thinks that you're trying to friendzone him and he will run, run, run, run. Number two is your meeting and letting the wrong types of men into your life and into your world. And so you need to find out what a man is looking for before you end up hooking up with him, right? There's some woman in the community the other day who was asking about this where she was like, Oh, there's this, you know, there's this guy and he said that he didn't want something exclusive. And I said that I did. And we've been kind of hooking up with each other already. And now I'm kind of pushing him away. But now he's coming back and telling me that he misses me. What, you know, should I should I ever bring it up again? And it's like, you know, you wouldn't even be asking that if you hadn't hooked up with him already, right? Because you're, you're emotionally involved, you're physically involved, you're involved from a time standpoint and energy standpoint. And so you want to get to the bottom of what's going on sooner rather than later. I mean, you don't want to come off as like, you know, some women, they go on dates and they're just screening, right? And that doesn't work very well either. If you go on a date and it's like, you know, interview questions the entire time, because you're just, you're just trying to find out as quickly as humanly possible, whether this guy is the type of guy that you want or not. Because what ends up happening is he's not invested in you at all. He's not really that interested. He's not connecting with you on any other level other than she's attractive. And she's kind of boring, because all she wants to talk about are these interview questions to kind of screen me out. And guys know that you're doing that. They know that you're kind of trying to screen them out. And those dates are the worst because they're so boring. And they're just like, it's kind of painful. It's like painful dating. If you want to go on painful dates, just do that. Obviously, you want to do you want to figure out what he's looking for quickly. But you want to do it fun in a fun way and a playful way. You want to get to know each other. You don't want to bring it out. And the very first thing, and it's all you talk about, and you're just screening each other, you want to have fun and enjoy your time together and enjoy your date and talk about things and have a good time while you figure all this stuff out. And so you want to do what I talk about in some of the other live streams that I've done where we talk about being playful and having fun and using verbal banter and all that kind of stuff, because that's what makes dating a lot of fun. And another thing to consider with this one is your patterns, right? A lot of women have these patterns where they're really, really attracted to guys that just want to hook up. And so if you're just like that, if you're just attracted, super attracted to dudes that just want to hook up, what you might want to consider is that whenever you're super attracted to a guy that might be a big red flag, right? It's a big red flag for yourself to look at it and say, okay, I have this pattern where I only am really attracted to guys who aren't good for me, right? So maybe what you need to do is you need to break that pattern and you need to start trying different things. So if you're going on certain dating websites and you are getting the same thing over and over and over again, you should try different dating websites or you should try going out and meeting guys in the real world, which I am a huge fan of. I think that's the best place to go and do this. And just try going out with guys you wouldn't normally go out with. Obviously, you need to be attracted to them. Obviously, all those things. However, just try doing different things. Just break the monotony up. Try different things that you wouldn't normally do so that you get different results. Because if you keep doing the same thing over and over and over again, and you're like, well, every guy is just a player or whatever, all of a sudden, it's like, okay, well, maybe you should try something different if you want to do something different. Because like I said earlier, most men are looking for something real. They just don't believe that they're going to find it. So do something different. Try new areas to go and date, break your normal patterns. Try doing something different. Number three is the one that most women don't want to look at. But it's also a very, very important one, which is that you're giving off an impression that this is what you're looking for. And, you know, I want to say this at first because this is the big complaint that I get all the time. And it's that men are responsible for their behavior. Men are always responsible for their behavior. And so are you. And it's one of those things where if you want, like if you show up to a job interview and you're like, you need to just accept that I'm a serious candidate, even though I'm showing up in a clown outfit, right? It's like, okay, well, how am I supposed to take you seriously when you're wearing a clown outfit? And there's actually a Dave Chappelle skit about this where he was talking about wearing like a police officer's uniform. And somebody comes up to him and they're like, Hey, hey, you know, can you help us? Like, we need you're a cop, right? You know, like, you need to come and help us. And he's like, well, just because I'm wearing a police officer's uniform doesn't mean that I'm a police officer. Right. And the point of the skit was that he was it was like a joke. Like, if you're if you want to give off a certain impression, you need to make sure that you're dressing the part of a person that wants to give off that impression, right? If you want to be taken seriously by men as something more than just superficial, then play the part of somebody who actually considers something else going on with them. And so the point is, is if you want men to take you seriously, don't show pictures of your butt and half naked photos in your app or online dating profiles, it just gives men the wrong impression. Second, set boundaries in your communication with men so that men know where your boundaries are and then stick to those boundaries, right? The whole thing about exclusivity before intimacy and making sure that you're setting boundaries in the right way, right? Communicating it in an effective way. I have a program called how to talk to men or how to talk to a guy. I think that's somebody else's program, how to talk to men. Mine is how to talk to a guy and I've got a program about that. If you're really interested in learning more about setting boundaries and some of the those kinds of conversations that you want to have with guys. Third, show aspects of your personality. If you don't go deep and wide with your connection with men and you're just kind of like this one-dimensional person, right? Don't be surprised when a guy is only interested in hooking up with you because it's like, well, I can't really find any other dimensions to a personality. So what else is there for me to fall in love with? What else is there to connect to? What else is there to really be with here other than just the simple things? I know that there's a lot of complaints around that, but it's like, if you're meeting guys and there's a lot of women out there that are like, oh, yeah, I met this guy and he's just so boring, right? And there's nothing going on with him. It's the same thing, right? If you go and meet a guy, he feels the same way, right? He's like, yeah, I don't know. She's really hot. That's what he ends up telling his friends when he goes home. She's really hot because that's all that's going on here, right? And so you want to have more there. You want to have more going on there.