 Well, a lot of you asked me to make this follow up video about Liza Koshy and David Dobrik and should they get back together? So that's what we're going to do right now. What is up everybody? This is Chris from the Rewired Soul where we talk about the problem but focus on the solution. And if you're new to my channel, my channel is all about mental health and what I like to do is pull different topics from the YouTube community to try to teach you how to improve your mental and emotional well-being. So if you're into that, make sure you subscribe and ring that notification bell and man. So today, today I took a nap with my amazing girlfriend Tristan and I woke up and you guys, we have hit 80,000 subscribers. How cool is that? Super, super, super cool. I love each and every one of you. For all of you who are new, welcome to the channel. You're all awesome but, but I need your help. I need your help. All of you Rewired Soldiers out there. I'm still trying to get to 10,000 followers on Instagram so I can get the swipe up feature. So if you have Instagram and you haven't yet, come follow me on Instagram. Tell your friends. Tell your mom. Tell your dad. Tell your grandma. Tell your little cousins or little, little siblings. Tell your coworkers, whoever it is. Go out on the street and say, yo, follow at the Rewired Soul on Instagram. I'm only like 2,000 away. I think I just want to help you guys swipe up, you know, because I go on there and I say a story. I'm like, hey, new video up but I can't make you, I can't make it so you guys swipe up. I'm just trying to help you. You know what I mean? Anyways, I appreciate all of you. You're all awesome. But yeah, so let's talk about this topic. So those of you who are new to my channel, I don't know David. I don't know Liza Koshy. I don't know these people. All right. This video is more opinion, mental health based. Some of my own experience. I would love to hear from some of you if you've tried this. But anyways, let's talk. So I made a video earlier about Liza Koshy and how she took this break to improve her mental health. Like a lot, a lot, a lot of credit to her. Like that was one of the better mental health break videos I've seen. Like super, super proud of Liza Koshy. But something that led to her working on herself was her split from David Dobrik. So Liza Koshy and David Dobrik made a video a while back saying we broke up and they broke up and Liza Koshy talked about how like she needed to work on herself. She needed to learn how to love herself before she could love anybody else and all of that. So something I mentioned in my last video was, you know, should, should they get back together? All right. And this is something that I personally have experienced with working on my own mental health, going through my addiction, getting clean and sober, starting to date again and all of that. So, you know, the, there's a few things to take into account because some of you have gone through this. Some of you have gone through a split because you knew that you needed to work on yourself or they needed to work on their self or both of you need to work on yourself, whatever it is. So I'm going to just kind of bring up some different points and, you know, this is ultimately up to you. But if you can relate to this in any way, hopefully that you take something away from this. So one of the, one of the questions that I get is, you know, is it true that you have to learn how to love yourself before you love somebody else? Like absolutely, absolutely, or you need to be in that process. Okay. So, for example, some people find in or like in a relationship, during a relationship, you realize like, oh my God, like I'm relying on the other person for all of this love. I don't have any for myself, right? And if you are a person who doesn't love yourself truly and you're trying to find other people to fix you, this is something I bring up all the time, it's selfish and self centered, right? Because you are putting a lot of pressure on that other person. You are saying, I don't love myself, you need to love me extra. So I believe that I am lovable, right? And that's not always fair to the other person. This is why, you know, people get really clingy or they need a lot of attention and things like that. So the other issue is, is that it's very hard to believe that the other person loves you, right? If you don't truly love yourself, it's hard to believe the other person loves you. So this is something that a lot of people struggle with who have abandonment issues, self esteem issues, things like that. I know some people with borderline personality disorder struggle with this. If you're somebody who struggles with BPD, let me know if you have experience with it down in the comments below. But especially when it comes to black and white thinking, you might think one day or in one situation even, they love you truly. But then they do something that kind of throws you off. Maybe they don't return a text message or a phone call or they didn't show you attention, right? And now they don't love you. Now you're freaking out, right? And that can start an argument and all of that. So I'm really glad that Liza took this time off to take a look at herself and learn how to love herself and improve her mental health. But the other reason why that's important is, is because it can put a strain on the other person, right? Like when we are not mentally well, like you guys, one of the reasons I work on my mental health so, so, so, so much is because it would not be fair to Tristan if I wasn't mentally well and I wasn't working on myself. I get a lot of comments who, of people who are like, you know, offended when I say you shouldn't date when you're like mentally unwell or you know, whatever it is, like, because it's unfair. Like you need to work on yourself. Like think about, think about the audacity that I would have to have, like basically saying this, you should date me. I'm not going to work on myself and you should put up with all my crap, right? You know, like that's not fair. But if someone's dating you and you're actively working on yourself, whether it's through therapy or anything else, maybe it's just taking your damn medications, right? Then it is fair to the other person, okay? Like there, there's a lot that goes into, like, relationships are hard, man. Relationships are hard, but it's even harder when one or both people struggle with mental illness. That's why it's important that we need to work on ourselves, okay? So when it comes to should they get back together, it's, it's yes and no, right? It really depends. Who knows if they even want to get back together? Like for example, for example, perfect example, my son's mom and I, we realize after our split, like we're way better friends than we ever were together, right? Our relationship today is a thousand times better than it ever was when we were together for years. You know, we co, we were together for a few years after my son was born and even before that and everything. And like we know now that we were just better friends, okay? So maybe they'll find that out. But if you can relate to this, like I've made videos about the spoiled milk philosophy, right? And, and sometimes that's true. Sometimes there's things that, you know, won't change in the other person. So it's possible, it's possible in Liza Koshy's situation or maybe in your situation where you break up and, and it's, it's hard to explain this. And I hope nobody takes offense to this, but let's say Liza and David were like this, right? Liza goes off and starts working on herself. Now Liza starts coming up here, okay? David isn't working on himself. This is all hypothetical, okay? Well now Liza's up here and David's still here. She progressed with her, her mental well-being, her emotional well-being, her spiritual well-being, right? All these things, but David just stayed in the same place. So it might be a bad idea to get back to them, but same thing with you. If you're single right now and you're working on yourself, like maybe your motive's wrong, like oh, I'm gonna work on myself so I can get back with him or I can get back with her, right? But what happens is when we start working on ourselves, we discover that we're a different person. The new person that we are, the evolved person that we are wouldn't date that person again. And I hope, I hope that makes sense because this is something that happens quite often. For example, I went through this. I thought that one of the relationships I was in, back in my addiction, was purely because of me. It was purely a bad relationship because of me because I was in my active drug addiction, my active alcoholism, all that. And then I decided to go get sober and then get better. And I was sober for two or three years, maybe two years at this time. I was like, oh, okay, this was all me, so let's try to do this again. I started dating her again, but like, like she hadn't changed at all. I had made all this change and she hadn't changed at all. And it didn't work out. It didn't work out. It worked out terribly. And this is another unpopular opinion. Oh my God, I'm going to get in so much trouble for this. But some of you need to hear it. You know what? Tough love, Chris. Tough love, Chris, wearing a corgi shirt that says, I heart you with a corgi butt. All right, so you can't get too mad at me for this statement. But let me, I'll use me as an example, okay? So you have to realize, so I was a drug addict and alcoholic. I was irresponsible. I wasn't allowed to see my son. I was unreliable. Like all these terrible things like, what kind of person was going to date me? Like clearly something has to be a little bit wrong with that person. Like I know it sounds terrible, but like if you're a little bit on the kooky side, like a lot of us are, sometimes we have to ask ourselves, like why are you trying to date me? Here's another good example. Anybody who's in recovery from addiction, you know exactly what I'm talking about. Like sometimes a newcomer comes into like the rooms, like, you know, 12 step meetings or something like that. And then like somebody with a bunch of time, like wants to date them or is hitting on them. Like what is wrong with that person? Like when people are newly sober, like we are hot messes. Like I have to question and be like, is there something wrong with you for even wanting to date me? You know what I mean? But I think in this situation, like what we might see is that Liza has progressed into a certain place and maybe David is not, right? So one of the things that you find through therapy, which Liza Kosci has done is, like I have a video that a lot of you have watched and my mom elaborated on more where it's like, why you date, who you date. So Liza Kosci in therapy might have realized why she even dated David Dobrik in the first place. And that might be something that she grew out of and said, oh my God, I get into the same pattern of dating the same type of guy. Maybe this isn't healthy for me, all that. And that's all hypothetical, but that's something that you might realize in therapy too. Like Tristan is different than the women that I used to date because I've worked on myself and came to clarity. Like I used to date a bunch of women who were very toxic and bad for me because that's what I was used to. You know, but now I've grown and changed. Now, you know, I'm with Tristan and this is like the healthiest relationship I've ever been in. So that's kind of my two cents on this. Like could it work out? Maybe, I don't know. But if they did and David wasn't working on himself, it might just turn into another bad situation. But for some of us, like, I'll end up with saying this. For some of us, we need to try it again just to kind of show ourselves like, hey, it's not gonna work. You know what I mean? There are no losses, there's only learning experiences, okay? But anyways, that's all I got for this video. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. If you're new, make sure you subscribe and ring that notification bell because I make a ton of videos. And if you're not following me on Instagram yet, I don't know what you're waiting for. Go follow me at the Reward Soul. And a huge thank you to everybody supporting the channel over on Patreon. You are all amazing. And if you would like to become a patron too, click the top right there, all right? Thanks so much for watching. I'll see you next time.