 Hey everybody! Hey everybody! Hey everybody! It's five o'clock. It's time for Watch Me Work. I'm Susan Laird Parks. We are so appreciative. We say thank you to the public theater and thank you to Howl Around, because they provide the way for the portal so that we can get together on Monday afternoons and talk about your work and your creative process. We've been doing this show for like 15 years. I tell people about it. They're like, Jesus! Good Lord! Oh my God! I'm like, yeah, we sure have. And it's just so joyful. Last week particularly was really beautiful. So we thank you guys. So we know how to do this. I'm sorry. I'm looking for my timer, which is over here. Excuse me one sec. This is what we do. We're going to set a timer for 20 minutes and then we're going to talk with you about your work and your creative process. And if you should have a question about your work or your creative process, Lolly is going to tell you how to get in touch. Go Lolly! That's right. If you have a question, if you're in Zoom with us, you can ask questions by clicking on the raise your hand button, which should be in the participants tab, likely on the bottom of your screen. If you have any trouble finding the raise your hand button, send me a private message in the chat and I will do my best to help you. If you're watching with us on the HowlRound live stream, feel free to send us your questions via the public feeders Twitter or Instagram accounts or via Watch Me Works Twitter account, which is at Watch Me Work SLP with the hashtag HowlRound. That's hashtag H-O-W-L-R-O-U-N-D. Fantastic. I always want to say R-O-U-N-D. That's somebody else's melody. Okay, so we've got our 20 minutes. You ready? And here we go. Righty, righty, righty. Here we are. We're back. Thanks, Lolly. So now we take, that was the work portion of our program. We're going to take some questions if anybody has any or answers or just want to look at each other's background. Hey, there's a question. Hey, Matthew. Hey, good afternoon. Happy to start everything off here. Yeah. I am continuing to work on that artwork, looking at the people in the future. And because I'd like to do this without having any dialogue being spoken by people, I realize I'm really living in a world of gestures and starting to get really up to speed with how to speak through gestures and running into just a lot of questions about how culturally specific some gestures are and how to try and speak fluently in a way that's accessible to an audience, even with gestures that don't exist in our time that are invented, but in a way that are able to reach others. Again, knowing that there may be some cultural leanings with some people so they wouldn't understand and other people would. How do I navigate that whole path? Correct me if I'm wrong. Please correct me. I thought you had a series of poems, many, many, many, that you're doing on a video and you're working on video, but so nothing spoke, you don't want to have anybody actually say anything. There's the poetry and I actually locked that, I just got back from vacation and I'm like, thank you, I'm very excited about that. But one of the poems called Miraculous inspired an artwork, which is going to have three video panels, which will look like you're looking through a window, everything should be hopefully life-sized and they're basically on the other side of the window in the future. We, the viewers are here in the present. There are other elements to it, but ultimately it's these people in the future who get a chance to have the window to the past. Right. And they will be to whatever degree they're trying to communicate through gestures. And again, I think that my understanding is that some gestures are very culturally or regionally specific. So it could be something where people would be making a gesture and then half the people who might see this artwork would have no idea what that means. And the other half would go, oh my gosh, that's perfect. And I know you've done work where you've used gestures without any dialogue. Is there any way of moving through this? Yeah, that's a great question, Matthew. I, it's tricky. I think you actually, depending on what you want them to be communicating, you might have some actors improv and try it out. And I mean, is it, are you going to film what they do? Is it going to be captured or is it? Yes. Yeah, it'll be filmed. So you might want to, you might want to have actors try it out and see what resonates with people. And you don't want it spoken, but is there any sort of, you know how you go to a museum and it has, you know, there's a beautiful painting or whatever and then it has a little card next to it to sort of give you some information on it. I think it's interesting at all to you sort of to supplement what is not being said to sort of give the viewer a kind of context. Right, there's actually a whole different context. There are every seven to nine seconds going to be different lines coming up, which are explaining something happening at this time. Basically, at this time a human being is and you pick your thing and people all over the world. And then that will change the future because of course everything that we do, when you think about the fact your great great great great grandparents had to have things go exactly right and then everybody passed that down to us for us to get here. Everything everybody does affects everybody to follow and so that those action steps to the present will be happening concurrently with this stuff that's happening in the future which from time to time will change because of some of these things that are happening now. So there's there's that play against it but you know in terms of what the gestures mean. I'm looking at a diverse cast who will bring in their own language of gestures. I'm assuming but in order to just broaden the palette. I had a little dictionary of body language. Just to get me started but but I'm not somebody who's familiar with working in the theater. And I've worked with actors in conjunction with my work but it's not in quite the creative way. And you're right Matthew that it's culturally specific, some people in and I mean it varies from really person to person because you can have two people from, you can say the same culture, and somebody might speak a lot with their hand, and somebody from the same culture might not speak at all with their body at all. Because that's more about maybe the way they were raised. So, I would say maybe, you know, let the actors do their thing. And, and it's funny, I would say, you know, if there's there's no way to really communicate what specifically that they're saying so I would just let the act give the actors room to just act with their bodies but not to. I don't say worry about it too much it's weird but but I, I think you, the more important it is for you to have the audience understand what specifically they're saying, then you might augment the gestures with some language. If you really find it oh man nobody gets this then you're going to have to make a choice you know I'm saying, because if you if you're a lighting designer say working in a theater, and you have a great idea for a lighting queue. It's fantastic, and you can't see the actors when you do a lighting queue. Okay, if I want to be honest to the actors I'm going to have to modify my idea a little bit so that my work can be appreciated in the way I wanted to be appreciated. So you might see what happens you know. Would it help to give them ideas of things to try and communicate. Definitely you can give them prompts and sure oh definitely definitely definitely. Yeah definitely and and and work with them collaboratively to see what what you guys start developing you know. Again a great project man. Thank you so much. Thank you. Looks like we have Lou up next. How was your project. How was your project last you were giving it to the publisher where you how's it going. I was giving it to my agent. Oh you hear me okay. Yeah. And it's still evolving it's still going. I'm still going I'm still working all the time. Trying to separate the like you talk about the marketplace versus the art of it. But I spoke to her again today. She still wants to work with me so I think it's going well. She's still you know she's still invested I'm invested so thanks. So great. Yeah, I feel the best about it, then I felt in the four years I've been working on it. And I'm going to try to ride that as long as possible and I think I only feel as good about it. Today because of how much work. I do want it like I used to see the work and it not being in the light of day as like a failure like you know it only still lived in my computer or something but. I'm sitting now that the work is making it better and richer and it actually might be a gift that nobody's wanted to run it yet because I think I'm only getting better, and I only understand more what I want to do so. Some of that's about being here with you and everybody and working so thank you for that. My question is related to my project, which inside of my project I talk a lot about my career and advertising and some of the difficulties that I faced, and being a person who couldn't be featured in the advertising, but making it. And that disconnect between having a body and a physical form that's not aspirational but manufacturing aspiration for people. And part of the journey of the story is about, is about me being in these spaces for literal decades like I worked in media for a literal decades. And so my question is, well maybe it's another statement before the question, I've been thinking a lot about, oh shit I'm writing this story that's sort of like searingly kind of judgmental of these spaces but I was still there the whole time. And I realized that myself as a character might seem like not believable or something like like that this idea of like me as a character in these spaces saying these things about the things I saw but like where I am now I'm evolved to a point where I understand my relationship was toxic but like while I'm inside of it. I went there willingly. I went there every day on purpose. I did things. So I guess what I, maybe my question is about like solubility as a character, or my question is about flawed decision making as a character. And I think it's particularly difficult because the character is me, like the narrator of this piece. But I guess I wanted to ask you about people who make bad decisions and like how to write them with heart or how to maybe, and I think I want to ask a question that there's no answer to you which I kind of want to absolve myself from judgment from the reader for like making decisions where I put myself in these, these environments and now I'm talking poorly about them and I think if I were to read that I might be like well what the fuck are you doing there for 15 years. So this is like a little bit again I don't know the answer but I just kind of want to talk about like, when people make bad decisions in art like what, or decisions that maybe you don't serve them, like what is that dynamic like and how do you have grace for them and when you're creating them. I don't know. I think it's a great question Lou. I mean, you know for me it's like anybody who was lived, really lived should have compassion. If you, if you're really here. You know what I mean, if you're really here. You know how difficult it is, you know, if your phone and it in, and you're, or you're someone with massive amounts of privilege who unlike the Buddha, never left his parents house, you know, to go and see what the world was really like, or whatever you think of Jesus you know he left his dad's house or his parents house to almost see what the world is like yo oh it's rough. You know what I'm saying so, if you really live then you, you would have compassion for people so we might read your book or other books were, or other, we hear about people who stumble. And sure we say you know we want, we want them to get up and we want them to be perfect but we know how difficult it is to really live in the world. And I think that it sounds like what you're writing a showing is how you, yeah you went to work every day with intention and on purpose, and that was the best you could do at the time. Now you're somewhere else, you know, working to make better choices. You know, and if we want to like this you for that or whatever. You know, then we've never, we've never done anything. You know what I mean, everything about you know and then that's, you know, but it's interesting it hopefully it'll call forth compassion in the reader. We've all been there. Yeah, we've all been there. And it's really honest to say like, I've made mistakes. I'm not perfect. I had a hard time. You know, I, there was that that those that we could I didn't know all the answers for that month or that year, or decade or decade or two. And I thought, well, because, because there's all sorts of reasons why we're involved in, you know, relationships systems, you know, we sometimes we try to change things from the inside. Sometimes we figure that this is the best we can do for ourselves sometimes there are all kinds of reasons why we're in situations that aren't. I think the people who stand outside of systems and situations and just are always given it a thumbs down, or cancel this person cancel that person I feel like whoa, you know, put some years on your back. I really see how hard it is, you know, people who think that, you know, if you're going to play in the entertainment business you always should be the one to stand up and say things and call people out and this and that. You know, go into a meeting and see how hard that is, you know, and then you'll then you'll know that it's a lot harder to actually be in those rooms. And you're, you can't always be heroic. Yeah, you know, sometimes you just have to get through the day. So, yeah, a lot of the story is a big theme in the story is how I thought I could change things from the inside and then learned that that was. Sure. Yeah, you can't change the master's house you can't dismantle the master's house the master's tools. Sure. But with so many of us tried that I mean we're in the world. We're going to make the world a better place well. You know. Yeah, that's beautiful though. And but that's and that's that that can be a part of the book that is amplified you know I think the the narrator. If they're you know you can you can amplify that. You can come up against that kind of often touched upon situation. Which is, which is very beautiful. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Thanks great question I'm glad it's gone glad you're proud of your work, because you have done the work you really been working hard and I like the nail polish. What color is it like black or dark red or what. Sorry, it's like a wine color, you know. Thank you so much. Thank you. I love it too. Very cute. Sujin me looks like they have a question. I'm asking you to unmute. Hey, so Jen. Hello, hi everybody. Hi, Susan Laurie. I have a question about. I'm at this place where I've written a bunch and it's been sitting in the drawer or in the files, if you will for a while and I'm about to apply as a cohort to this DC thing called the welders I don't know if anyone in New York has heard of it or maybe you're all over. It's been around I don't know about three iterations about nine years now and then they're doing the next generation so every three years, people apply to help self produce and I have to go through all my play babies and figure out which one do I want to open up again. And in fact, when I look at plays, I kind of see them as lovers, honestly, because you get really intimate with the world and I feel like, who do I want to sleep with again and you know it's like really hard to figure that out. Or maybe I need to sleep with somebody new. It's time to you know, get back on the apps or whatever. So I'm in this quandary, and there are a couple of new ideas I'm excited about. I haven't really fleshed it out. I've been it's been like lurking in my imagination for several years. And then of course, there's like my MFA thesis play that, you know, I haven't really gone back to, and I don't know if I was ready to write it like, I think it was like 15 years ago I wrote it. It was probably I was I was probably too close to things that happened and I wrote it too early and it was a little traumatic to write. And so now that I have, like you mentioned, life experience right a little bit of life experience. I think I have a better vantage point to write so that all the characters are more three dimensional and it's not like there's only one bad person, right. There's all the characters have different shades in them, right. Right. So, um, I'm wondering when you have to pick either a play child or a play lover to see again. How do you choose. Do you go through and read everything I mean that that'll take a while I do read every word and be like oh I'm still turned on by this or I'm completely turned off. Um, what is your process and how has that been for you. And it's something that I could always switch up like we have to do applications now, but maybe in a couple of months I might not be in love with what I proposed. And so when no one's going to be like well you you know this and that so. Right. Right. That's great. Great question. Great question. So, um, you have to do the application now. Yes, like yeah, I'll get 15th is the deadline. Great she got like a month. And you have to hand you have to send them a manuscript. No you don't. It's, it's, you know you're just proposing that I could always say I have, you know, the fifth iteration of the, you know play or what have you I can count back, but you don't need to turn in something you just have to basically take a paragraph like a quick little synopsis. Okay. And then you say something about yourself as well. Yes, kind of like why do I want to apply to be a welder. It's okay I can be out of the closet about it, and I think other people. You know, whoever that's great. No, and how many do they take. They're only taking one group. So it has to be like six or seven folks, because we are going to be the, you know, the theater company kind of like a pop up your company for three years if you will. Right. So, yes. So, you're going to get in right. I hope so but the thing is we need to propose like six new works it's not just like ooh we're just going to pick one, but we're hoping that each person in our group. They'll obviously have something that they've been dreaming of or you know, wanting to work on with us. And so it's it's probably six artists with six new plays and hopefully. And then as a group you go in as a as a as a as a cohort. Okay, you did say that. Great. Okay, okay. So I would say, which, and I say, since reading rereading the plays will take too long. Okay, so how about writing all the plays on separate index cards. You know what I mean, each each play has an index her right. Okay, and then you lay them all out on a table and you which one is most like me. You know what I mean which one feels like me the most most or which three feel most like me which are interesting, which one feels like me right. I'm not saying which one is the most personal or tells the most, you know, you know, autobiographical and saying that which one really shows myself. However, you want to define that right. That's the one I would go with the most which one I'm most excited about. And I listened when you were talking about your, your former MFA thesis you were talking about it more than the other ones. You know, like, you know, we're talking about dating, you know, you're talking about that person more, you know, I feel like I'm older now and I could go back to that and I could make something of it. That's exciting to me you know there shows that there's some interest there. But but I don't I don't know I don't know about your other projects so much. So which one gets you the, which one is most exciting to you. Because if you get in or you don't. That's the one you should work on anyway. That's the one that you should carry across the finish line. Right. Does that does that does that. That's super helpful I love this index card writing thing. That's not hard. Right, we got to make it easy. It's got to be fun. I also have some index cards, you know what I mean, you like walk around with them you can sit in a coffee shop and go yes, you know, or right and maybe on the title on the front flip it over right why you love it. I love it because it's crazy I love it because there are 100 characters. I love it because they're 12 songs and acrobat I don't know what you know what's got but you just kind of why you love it, why you love it so much. I think this is the first time I wrote our love it's because it's the most recent play. I love it because, you know, and, and when you get to the place where I think this one is cool because people will think it's cool. Maybe not so much. You know, maybe not so much. The ones that you really think are exciting to you. Then you then it's a win win. Right. Okay. Great. I will do the index thing and I'll just carry it around and you know when I wake up I wonder which one I'll grab like you know that kind of thing. Thank you so much that's that's that's really helpful and also lovely space I didn't know this was going on for did you say 15 years. Well, it's been a while. Yeah, well the pandemic, the lockdown made all the years do weird stuff so. Lockdown has brought us together in this in this zoom because before that we were just in the lobby of the public theater it was, you know, Milani can tell she used to call in every week. It was kind of rough. It was rubber Lin was there. Yeah, back from there we were like hanging out the lobby anyway but this is much nice. I'm just sitting in my living room. I love it and I love your guitars. Thank you so much. Thank you. Good luck with it and check back in and tell us how you're doing. Melania. Yes. Hi. I'm fine. I remember those times I remember trying to make my question as a tweet, because I did my way. And they were so long. It was one. I love this face. Yeah. Yes. And I have this question that I am. I love our group and I am listening a lot about enthusiasm. There is something about what we love what we like and trying to do that going to to the things that give us this right joy. Right. What is happening to me that long ago before doing this presentation that I gave my my work you remember the novel that I could finish and I, I show up there and I did it. There was a play that the person that I said family member from Argentina, she's an artist and she asked me about a play because she knows that they write. And I said, yes, and we began the process. It was fine. She was very happy. Everybody has read that. And I don't know what happened to me. I told you about this long ago. They didn't because they said I would love to have a play written by you and I say, yes. Right. And the process will be read something. Then this other opportunity came. I stopped that and now that process was wonderful. And then I got stuck. I couldn't go further and this other thing appeared. So I left that the first project. And now what is happening to me that the idea of coming back to that work doesn't give me a lot of enthusiasm and more that I want to do it. But I don't know if I am scared because I am stuck or it's like maybe not something that I should do right now. I don't know how to discern what to do with the project because I gave my word. I say yes. I said yes. And I, I, I like to keep my, my word now because I try to, I say yes. Right. So I don't know what is happening to me is that, and I am, I know that I am thinking about it. And it comes when I, for example, I am listening to all of you and I am learning a lot. And I could feel that that they came comes to me all the time. At the same time, I would love to write more for children. It's something that I, there is a desire there. So I don't know exactly what, how to proceed to the future is should I try this play and try to finish something at least a first draft so I can give it to this person that I love. And I promise the work. Or saying no and saying no makes me feel weird, but at the same time trying to do the work. I know it's going to be tough because I don't know how to go on. It was a wonderful beginning and then something happened and I don't know what, what it was. And I would like to know what are your thoughts about when when something doesn't give you enthusiasm but at the same time you feel that it would be good to do it, because I would like to finish that. Right, right, right, right. That's a great question Melania your question you're always so good. So let's say enthusiasm, closeness to the spirit. Right, I think that's right right okay so enthusiasm. It, it, it, it's, it's, let's just say you're a talk to start talking about dating is it's like love. Right. And God is talking about dating and dating. It's like love so some days, you feel a certain kind of love. We feel love for your partner but it's going to. Maybe you're kind of annoyed at them because they didn't clean out the bathroom or whatever. So it's like, I love you, you know, like that. And sometimes it's love because they cook your favorite dinner or something like that. I love, right. So this enthusiasm. Why don't we say it manifests itself in different ways. Sometimes it's like, oh goody I get to work on the project. Sometimes it's like yeah I really see myself as writing that kind of thing. And sometimes it's like, I really got to finish this. Maybe that's a form of enthusiasm. So, now it's much easier to go, I'm excited, you know right and excitement enthusiasm that kind of thing. This this sort of quiet, the enthusiasm of responsibility. The quiet call they're like, the work is calling to you from behind of a thick block, which could if you see it in the right way become a stepping stone. So, so how do we answer the call of enthusiasm when it is. It looks like it's being obscured by difficulty right. It's a circumstance. We, and it's great we find a way to work. Right. So, maybe we work for, I don't know, could you, could you spend 15 minutes a day with it. You know, is that, is that a possible. I mean by 15 minutes of that like you set your timer for 15 minutes, and you pick a time, you know, maybe, I don't know, first thing in the morning or what at whenever right before you launch into your bigger project, and you spend 15 minutes, just, I don't know, right, you, maybe they have a work has a special notebook and you just write your notebook about it. You just write a file on your computer and you just type for 15 minutes, or you type for seven minutes and you sit there you go for eight minutes. Right, you just spend or let's make it let's make it 10 minutes. Let's make it easy. Right. 10 minutes a day. Sorry, they're coming to get somebody. 10 minutes a day. Right. 10 minutes a day. You just spend 10 minutes a day with this, this project. That's all inch forward. Take one little step. Right. Maybe the project shy. Maybe they're scared. Maybe they don't feel like, I don't know, they don't know what they're doing. They don't want to waste your time. I don't know whatever the reason is, you just inch toward them. So you have a project that maybe you spend an hour on a day in this project is only you spend 10 minutes on a day. Right. You know. Okay. Right. You yourself I can't hear you. Yeah, I was trying to say yes. Thank you. It's very helpful. Because you are changing my way of looking at it. It's another way of looking at it is another narrative. Right. The enemy. No, no, no, no. It's definitely not the enemy. It's probably a really deep old friend. That you just need to approach gently. And with love and care. And you don't expect the answers to come quickly. And you're working on it. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. It's so fun because we get to, you know, again, like you said, Milani, we changed, we reframed the narrative. We changed the narrative on things. Right. Yeah. It's very, very helpful. Thank you very much. Thank you. Yay. Hey, how are you doing, Len? Hey everyone. I'm so sorry. My internet. I was just asking Len how she was. How are you doing? Oh, I can't hear you. Can you unmute yourself? I think I unmuted you. Thank God. I just wonder how you're doing. That's all. There's my voice. The beautiful background. That's so gorgeous. Oh, thank you. You know, this lovely woman who was 92. Made these back, you know, paints and made these backgrounds and, and I was just so moved by some of them. And so I keep on changing my background and putting her picture self occasionally, you know. Yeah. I love that. Yes. I'm writing every day and, and I'm focusing. You know, I went to this workshop with a woman named Natalie Goldberg. Oh yeah. Oh, she's a great writer. She's wonderful. Yeah. Just wonderful. And, um, It was very stimulating. I get stimulated by listening to other people. It gives me. Ideas. You know, I'm a little shy. I love that. Yes. I'm writing every day and, and I'm focusing. You know, I went to this workshop with a woman named Natalie Goldberg. I'm a little shy about asking, but, um, It gave me a focus on, uh, you know, Just. She constantly talks about writing practice. That is to say writing every day. And, um, And that has really, really helped me to, uh, have a continuity and it turns into a focus, you know, And so I'm ever grateful for her, her workshop. You know, And of course I love you and I'm ever great for you. You know, When is your next, can I ask you a question? When is your next play going to be done in the fall? Oh, All or this spring. No, no. Um, I have three this fall and one in the spring. Um, Top dog is going to be back on Broadway plays for the plague year is going to be at Joe's pub and Sally and Tom is going to be in Minneapolis. Wow. Wow. Wow. Top dog is going to be on Broadway. Top dog is going to be back on Broadway. Fantastic. I know it's good. I know 20 years. People. I know it's going to be, but thank you for asking. Yeah. It's going to be fun. They're all happen. It's like, I'm going to be everywhere all at once, but I feel like we can, we can keep watching work going as much as possible. Because of zoom. So we ran and the way that the public fear and how rounded kept it pulled together, which is a real gift. That's really a real blessing. Top dog again. I mean, I saw it originally is so awesome. It was just so awesome. It was like, thank you. Oh God, you can write anything. Yeah. In a room. Yeah. It was, it was amazing to me. Thank you. One of my stimulations. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. Amazing. Thank you. So, so I'm good. I'm good. And I'm delighted to be having continuity to my writing now. I just love you. There you go back at you. Well, it looks like we're at six o'clock. It's six. Oh my gosh, it's six o'clock already. We'll be back next week. We will be back next week. All of the sign up sheets are on the public theater website. So sign up and we'll see you same time, same place. Thanks everybody. Great question. Thank you.