 The reason why the narcissist has to keep you around. The narcissist will often attach themselves to you. And they will always have a reason or excuse for being around you. Even though they claim that you are not right or no good for them. They will still cling to you and they will get very angry if you try to walk away. There could be several reasons for this. Maybe they don't have it anywhere else to go. Or maybe they need you for financial support. But the main reason that I would like to discuss is that they are overly dependent on you emotionally. They need you for emotional support. They need you to be their emotional punching bag. They take out all their emotional distress, anger, anxiety and suffering out on you. Maybe they had a long day and someone upset them. But they couldn't react in the way that they would like to. Because they know that's not an appropriate way to behave in a public setting. They know that it would tarnish their false image. So they hold in that anger until they get home or until they see you. And that is when they release it. You are the one who has to deal with that anger and frustration. And that is why they have to keep you around. Because they need someone to regulate their emotions. They need someone who will put up with their BS without questioning or confronting them. Someone who will accept them regardless of what they do to you. Regardless of how they treat you and you don't get anything in return. You give up everything to be their nothing. You give up your passions, joy and happiness to be their pet, their slave, their punching bag. You go through all of this abuse. You are treated with cruelty and violence. You experience constant confusion and uncertainty. And in return you get nothing. You stay with them because you hope that maybe they will see what they're doing wrong. Maybe then they will change. But the narcissist believes that they deserve this privilege and special treatment. They believe that they deserve someone who loves and accepts them. Regardless of what they do to you. But it never works out that way. The reason why the narcissist has to keep you around is because they need someone who they can control. Someone who they can have influence and authority over. It provides them with a false sense of stability and security. It makes them feel secure. It makes them feel as though they are in control. And they just expect you to accept it. They expect you to not complain about it. That is what they want from you. That is why they have to keep you around. Because they have so much anger and frustration inside of them. And they don't know how to release it. They don't know how to deal with it on their own. So they project it onto the person who is closest to them. Even though it has nothing to do with you. When you are the closest person to them. They will project everything from their past onto you. They expect you to absorb all of their pain and distress. And they see nothing wrong with it. They think that it's okay. And they expect you to be comfortable with it. They have unrealistic expectations. They expect you to be okay with this. And even see it as a privilege. Because in their minds they are so great. You should feel honoured to kiss their feet. No matter how degrading and humiliating it may feel for you. They see it as though you should feel privileged to do that. So whatever they do to you. However they treat you. You should just accept it. Once you begin to solve and explain. The manipulation and the games that they are playing with you. They have no choice but to leave you. They are never going to put themselves in a position. To be beneath something. That they believe that they are greater than. And once you are no longer willing to cooperate with them. You become a risk to their safety. Because they can no longer control you. They are expecting you to retaliate. They are expecting you to take revenge on them. After everything they have done to you. So now you become a serious risk to their safety. And they know that the only reason you are with them. Is because they successfully manipulated you. And to stay with them. They know that you don't love them. Because they know they haven't given you anything. That would make you love them. They know that they are not being real or genuine with you. So there was never anything for you to love or appreciate. Because they were never considerate or compassionate towards you. It's just a game. And they are fully aware of this. You have to figure out what this game is. And once you do that. It's game over. They know that you will not have any consideration. Or consume for them after that. They know that you will not have any compassion or forgiveness for them. They know there's no going back. After how they have treated you. They know that you're never going to see them the same way ever again. And they are just waiting. And expecting for you to retaliate. They are expecting you to take revenge. They have to keep you around. But it's not because they love you. It's not because they care about you. It's just a game. And although they managed to trick themselves. Into thinking that you want them around or you love them. Deep down they know it's not love. They know that you would be better off without them. They know that it's just the illusion that you have fallen for. The fantasy. And that's what makes you think you love them. As the victim. You don't understand that it's not love. Because you're in the game. They have trapped you in their maze. Where you're just trying to figure things out. And once you do figure it out. The fall clears. You realize that it was never love. You were just being manipulated. You were being controlled. Once you leave the game. It should then make sense. Why it was so easy for them to leave you. As though you never even existed. Because it was never real. They can't experience love or intimacy. They only experience anger. Fear. And shame. And that is why they do what they do. That is why they could never treat you with the love. And respect that you deserved. But once you figure out the game. They already know what they've got to do. They've already planned their exit. Because they knew. That one day you were going to figure them out. And they know that there is no future in something. That started out as a game. Everything you saw. Everything they displayed to you. Wasn't even real. You thought you were getting to know someone. But it was all an act. They were just telling you what they thought you wanted to cure. Showing you what they thought you wanted to see. In the hopes that it would keep you around. But you never really knew them. Because there is nothing to know. It's just a bunch of coping and defence mechanisms. Games and manipulation. With no real human or heart in sight. Thank you for watching. I hope this video wears knit with you. Please like, comment, share and subscribe. Click the bell icon to receive notifications for my future videos. If you're a lightest in eight. My paypal link is in the video description. Coaching and queries you can email me at nartsfarvercoaching at gmail.com Thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon.