 Craft presents the Great Gilder Sleeve. Yeah. Craft cheese company will also bring you Bengt Crosby every Thursday night. Present each week at this time Harold Perry as the Great Gilder Sleeve, written by John Whedon and Sam Moore. We'll hear from the Great Gilder Sleeve in just a moment. But first I think most homemakers listening in will agree that between rising food costs and red stamp rationing, it's getting to be more and more of a problem to satisfy family appetites. Well if that's the case in your house, one good way to practice true economy is to place parquet, the quality margarine made by craft, at the top of your grocery shopping list. For parquet margarine requires just five red ration points and it's just about the finest flavored spread for bread your family ever tasted. What's more, parquet is a delicious seasoning for everyday hot cooked vegetables, a real flavor shortening for baking. And you'll especially like it for pan frying because it doesn't spatter or stick to the pan. Yes the family will like parquet for appetizing flavor and for wonderful nourishment too. It's one of the best energy food you can serve and every pound contains 9,000 units of vitamin A. So for flavor, for economy and for good nutrition, ask your dealer for parquet, P-A-R-K-A-Y. Parquet margarine made by craft. On the summer field where we join that illustrious citizen and industrious lover Dr. Morton T. Gildersleeve. And where do we find him? Well, love is funny. The door that yesterday was slammed in your face today flies open at your approach. And so we discover the great Gildersleeve and his lady love once more together, seated on the sofa in his living room, gazing into the future and laying plans for the event that is shortly to make him the happiest man in the world. Leela. Yes, Dr. Martin. A penny for your thoughts. Oh, gracious. My poor little old thoughts. They're hardly worth a penny. Well, you know me. I'm a spin fair. Silly. I'll tell you what I was thinking, though. I was thinking you and I are going to have to go and look at furniture one of these days soon. Furniture? What for, Leela? I've got more furniture now than you can sit on. I know, Dr. Martin, but after all... What's the matter with it? Well, I guess there's nothing really the matter with it, but it just hasn't any style. Oh, no. It's true, Throckmorton. Take that easy chair there. That's my chair. I know, and look at it. What's the matter with that chair? I like it. Oh, but look at the shape of it. That short little back and that great enormous seat. There's always a reason for everything, Leela. You know, the trouble with you, Throckmorton, you've been a bachelor so long, you're setting your ways. No, I... Yes, you are. But after we're married, things will have to be a little different. Now, this house, then... All right, I'll admit the house needs painting. That's all right with me. Well, that's not quite what I was thinking, Throckmorton. No? What were you thinking? Well, you know that big white house on the edge of town out toward the country club? The one that sort of sat back among the trees with a big lawn in front? You mean the old Burton place? I guess so, yes. Well, I understand it's for sale. The course is for sale. It's been empty for three years. Leela, you weren't thinking of moving out of this house. Well, it's a nice house in all Throckmorton, but it is kind of old-fashioned. I like it. Well, it's old-fashioned without being really antique, if you know what I mean. I like it. I just thought you're doing so well now and all. And Judge Hooker says he frankly doesn't think this place is suitable for a man of your position in this time. Oh, he doesn't. Well, you tell Judge Hooker not to worry himself about me. I'm not moving out of this house no matter what he thinks. Even if you knew that... No, that's my final answer, Leela. I wouldn't even consider it. All right, darling. If that's the way you feel about it, I won't say another word. All right. I hope you don't think I'm just being stubborn. Darling, the house is already forgotten. All I want in the world is for you to be happy, you know that. How old are you, my lord and master? Are you soon well-being? Lord and master. Yes. And give me a kiss. Throckmont. Yes, honey? Would you do something for me? Anything, my love? Something awfully sweet. Anything? What is it? Would you shave off your mustache? Shave it off, but Leela... Just to see how it would be, you can't tell. It might make you look younger. Younger? Yes. You don't want people to think of me as an old man's darling. Leela, if you don't think of me as old... Of course not, Throckmorton, but I'd just like to see how you'd look with Addy. No, sir. Nothing to it. I just wouldn't be me without my mustache, Leela. Very well. In that case, would you kindly move over, Throckmorton, and give me a little room on this sofa? Oh, now, Leela... You said you'd do anything I asked. You promised. Leela, why do you have to change everything? Can't you love me the way I am? Well, I don't think you can love me very much. All I ask you to do is to shave off a little old mustache. I'm not asking you to bind any new furniture. I'm not asking you to move. All right. Besides, a tickle. All right, Leela, all right. I'll shave it off. Delilah. I'm expecting to see you for another week of ten days. I know, I know, but here I am. Floyd, I want you to shave off my mustache. What? You heard me. Let's get at it because I'm a busy man. All right, Commissioner, but I don't mind telling you. I hate to do it. Never mind that. Lather me up. Okay, okay, you're the doctor, but I'll tell you why I say that. It was some years ago when I had my other shop over in Ashton. One day, a fellow committee was quite a character in town, sort of a public figure. A little on the stout side, like yourself. I suppose what's under your vest is laundry. No offense, Mr. Gillespie. No offense. But this fellow had been wearing a mustache all his life, 30 or 40 years. And all of a sudden, he came in and asked me to shave it off. That's why I came in, too. Oh, two shakes. Have to strop a little. Of course, I was just a young fellow then that didn't know what to know now. Full of beans and no brains. So I never gave it a second thought, just went right ahead and shaved his mustache like it was hay. Come on, Floyd, I haven't got it all day. When I was through, the fellow took one look at himself, then he put his hand over his face, ran out of the shop, tore down to the depot and bought a ticket and left town in the next train. He didn't come back till three months later, and by that time, he had a new mustache. I was the only fellow in town that ever saw him without it. And he never spoke to me again. So I ain't to shave off your mustache, Mr. Gilda Sleeve. But here she goes. Floyd, let's not rush into this thing, huh? No, sir. No, just trim off a little at each end so I can see how that'll look. Oh, slow and easy. I got you, Mr. Gilda Sleeve. About this much, say? A little less. About this much? A little more. There. All right, now sit still. There. Now, if you cover up the other end with your finger, you can get an idea. I'm afraid to look, Floyd. Go ahead and even her up. All right, now sit still. There. Well, how do you like it? I don't know. What do you think, Floyd? Hard to say. Makes you look different, all right. Well, if it ain't Judge Hooker, come on in, Judge. Morning, Floyd. Well, Gilda Sleeve, what on earth? Whose idea was this, your lady friend? Never mind, Hooker. Maybe I better call her up and tell her to get ready for a shot. If you stay away from her, you've made enough trouble already. What do you mean? What's the idea of putting bees in her bonnet about my house not being good enough for me? I didn't say it wasn't good enough for you. I said it wasn't good enough for a man with political ambitions. What do you mean by that? Well, it seems obvious enough. A man wants to be president, it's all right to be born in a log cabin, but time comes when he has to get out of it. Am I right, Floyd? Well, I... You stay out of this, Floyd. In the first place, Hooker, I'm not in politics. In the second place, the voters choose a man for his ideas, not his residence. Maybe so, Gilda, maybe so, but look at Congressman Abernathy. His house looks exactly like Thomas Jefferson, and that impresses the voters. Doesn't it, Floyd? Well, I... You stay out of this. Hooker, when I get ready to run for Congress, I'll buy a Jeffersonian house. Until then... All right, Gilda, all right. There's a house on the market now that'd be just right. You may not be there by the time you throw your hat in the ring. We're talking about you for Congress and 44, you know? They are? Definitely. Who? I can't tell you. Yes. But if you were to get your hands on that old Burton place... Well, maybe I'll think it over, Judge. So long, and thanks for the tip. Mr. Gilda, would you say tip? What? Oh, here you are, Floyd. What are you talking about, Leroy? Somebody's been sabotaging your mustache. Yes. I simply had a trim. Is supper ready? Any minute, Bertie says. Very well. Uh, come in and sit down here for a moment, my boy. I...I want to talk to you. Me? Yes, you. Oh, shunk, I don't think you've got a thing on me right now. I'm not accusing you of wrongdoing, young man. Is that the only subject you can think of for a conversation with me? Well, it seems to come up pretty often. But if you just want chit chat, I'll tell you about the horror picture I saw this afternoon. The Mummy's Claw. Mum, I don't want any chit chat. It's about a mummy that came back to life as a zombie. That's enough of that. But, um... Leroy, I want to ask you a question. Uh, are you happy here in this house? Oh, well, sure. Yeah, like a fine, huh? You're not thinking of throwing me out, are you? No, Leroy, I love you very dearly. Some of the time. What I want to know is, would you like it if we moved to some other house in another neighborhood? Well, you can still see him now, man. Oh, please, aunt. We don't want to move. It's swell here. Hello, Aunt Amore. What about supper? Any minute, Marjorie. I was just talking to Leroy. You look peculiar, Aunt Amore. What have you done to yourself? Nothing. It's his mustache. Well, it gets awfully hot in the summer, Margie, so I just thought that... Oh, I think it looks cute. Uh, thank you. Hey, Marge, you don't want to move to a new house, do you? New house? Now what's gotten to you? And to me, nothing, it's Uncle Mord. Leroy, I'll handle this. Well, what is this? You're not thinking of leaving this house? Well, not exactly, my dear. It was, uh, well, I just wanted to get your reaction. Oh, but Uncle Mord, well, I've lived in this house for more than 20 years. Leroy was born here. I love it. I love every room, every squeaky board in the stairs. Every rattle in the window. All right, my dear, all right. I just thought you might like a little more room. The old Burton house, for instance. Burton's? Oh, my gosh, Uncle, it's been three acres alone. Oh, it's not so far? Oh, I know why you're thinking about moving. Lila Ransom wants to live in the Burton house. That's what it is. Oh, but Marge, it was just a suggestion. I better with her idea of pulling with your mustache, too. I don't like that now, either. Stop it, Granny. My dear, if you don't want it, we won't move to the Burton house. My man, did you say move to Burton house? Now, Birdie. Because if you're going to live in that house, you have to revise your kitchen personnel. Hey! But Birdie, what's the matter with the Burton house? Mr. Gilseve, I don't want you to think I'm superstitious, but that house is haunted. It's haunted? Why, that's nonsense. Whatever gave you that idea? Well, everybody knows that old Mr. Burton shot old Miss Burton in that house, and one time I was walking past it with a gentleman's friend, and we heard the scariest noise they ever heard in their life. What kind of a noise, Birdie? Like something out of this world. That's the exact sound Leroy. Leroy, that's horrible. Birdie, when you and your gentleman friend heard this sound, didn't he investigate? No, sir. By the time he caught up with me, we were two miles away. For anybody to be calling on us by George, here he is at supper time again. Hello, Judge. I can't stay, Dr. Morton. I stopped him to tell you. I just found out the Burton estate would be willing to make a substantial reduction in that. Judge, I have decided not to go into that any further. Oh, so it was Judge Hooker's idea for us to move. What's going on here? What do you mean, my dear? Why is everybody trying to get us out of this house? Now, Marjorie, I just found out that the Burton estate is willing to make your uncle a very favorable offer. A state? By George, I begin to see the light. Estates have executors, don't they, Judge? Well, of course they do, you darn fool. What's that got to do with it? I dare say the executor of this particular state would make a pretty penny in fees if this particular house were sold. Would he not? It's just a set fee prescribed by statute. Answer my question. I did. All right. Now, who is the executor of this estate? Now, guilty, that's neither here nor there. It just happens this particular executor prefers to remain anonymous. Oh, he does, eh? This particular executor wouldn't happen to be named Horace W. Hooker. Would he Horace Hooker? Well, it just happened. Case dismissed. Let's get to dinner. Yes. Fred Gilderslee will be with us again in a few seconds. Meanwhile, if you've noticed that it's a case of first-come-first served at your neighborhood grocery store, you've probably taken a hint and planned your shopping early in the day and early in the week. That's the best way to provide variety in balance in family meals. And it's also good insurance that your dealer will have on hand the outstanding red stamp values like parquet, the quality margarine made by craft. Parquet sells very fast these days, and no wonder. Millions of people have found that for just five red ration points, they can buy a pound of a fine-tasting spread for bread that's also a delicious seasoning for cooked vegetables. They've learned, too, that parquet margarine is a real flavor shortening for home baking and that it's grand for pan frying. Now, it's the growing popularity of parquet margarine in your neighborhood, combined with wartime shortages, have made your dealer supply run out, asking for parquet again soon, for craft is doing everything possible to keep all dealer supply. Ask for parquet, the vitamin A fortified energy spread. Spelled, P-A-R-K-A-Y, parquet margarine. Let's get back to Summerfield, where a picnic seems to be afoot. It's a lovely Saturday morning, and Leela Ransom, who proposes the idea, has promised to lead the way to an ideal spot complete with brook. Come on, come on, Leeroy, and watch that book. Okay, I'm ready to cook plenty of fish tonight. You'll never taste that fish like I'm going to catch. No, and you ain't never caught them. Come on, Leeroy. I told Mrs. Ransom I'd be over there at 11.30. Oh, but I would, yeah. Let me see now. If I got everything, fishing rod, reel, bait, hooks, bobber, bees, stout, nice, stamping, holding camp kit. Where's my camp kit? Leeroy, we're only going for the afternoon. I know. Oh, here it is. Our spyglass compass. Compass. The place is only a mile from here. We can't get lost. I forgot my flashlight. Leeroy, we will be back before supper. I know. I'd just like to take it. If Leeroy sure gets excited, he's going to burn himself out before he's 15. Yeah. What does he want to drag all that stuff along for? I'm late now. Mr. Gilfield, you sure you don't want me to pack nothing for you? No, Bernie. Mrs. Ransom said she wanted to make the lunch. Yes, sir. I just wanted her to know your capacity. Huh? Well, I wouldn't worry much about that. You wouldn't want me to just wrap up a few pieces of chocolate cake. I got one just to fresh out the oven. You have, huh? Well, that sounds mighty good, Bernie. I might just call her up and ask her, huh? That's all you got to have time to keep body and soul together. Yeah. Hello. Leela? Poogee. I just called Lea... Huh? Oh, we will, Leela. We'll be right over. I'm just waiting for Leeroy. He's gone to find a co... Huh? Oh. Oh, I see. I guess I misunderstood, Leela. Oh, sure. Sure, I think it'd be nicer that way. I'll fix it. That's Leeroy coming in on a wing and a prayer. I'm afraid there's been a little misunderstanding, my boy. It's my fault. I... You see, I thought you were invited. What? It's all my fault, my boy, and I'm sorry. Oh, I never even used my folding camp kit. I know. And I'll make it up to you, Leeroy, some way. You see, Mrs. Ransom and I have a lot of things to talk over. You know, about weddings and such. Yeah, it's okay. Aunt, it's okay. I'll tell you what. Why don't you get piggy and go on a picnic of your own? I don't have an idea. Leeroy, you come with me. I'm going to fix you up a nice picnic lunch with all the things you like. Yeah, do that, Bertie. That'll be great. Leeroy? Yes, sir. And ain't no grown-ups going to get none of that chocolate cake, neither. No matter how much they come begging around. Oh, no, Bertie. Just one little piece. No, sir. Not one. Now, you go on out of here and leave me and Leeroy alone. I'm going, Bertie. Bye, George. I envy you, Leeroy. All that delicious cake. I wish I were going with you and Piggy. That's what I wish. I wish you were, too. Good. Have a good time. Gosh. Now, Leeroy, wasn't your uncle's fault? I know. I know whose fault it was. Invite you to a picnic and then change his or mine. What a character. I bet she's going to drag him out there and try to sell him that house again. Oh, my goodness. Don't worry. She won't get away with it. It's a good day to help you carry that heavy old basket. Well, this is nothing at all, Leeroy. I could carry it with my little fingers. Well, don't try. There's a famous bottle in it. I don't mind if I stop in here for a minute at the drugstore. Oh, not at all. I'll get off freckly if I don't, and you wouldn't love me with freckles on my nose with this rock martin. Oh, sir. Mrs. Ransom. Oh, and Mr. Peavey. Oh, Mr. Gillespie. Oh, quite a little gathering. Lovely day, isn't it, Mr. Peavey? It is indeed. Well, I see you're carrying a picnic basket there, Mr. Gillespie. Yeah. Yeah, a picnic basket. Going on a picnic? Yeah. Peavey, you're positively psychic. Well, now I wouldn't say that. Mrs. Peavey is the psychic member of the family. Mrs. Peavey is psychic? Off and on, yes. She has what is called second side. Second side? That stuff is a lot of fun. Well, now I don't know, Mr. Gillespie. Mrs. Peavey does some pretty strange things. She often sees things that are coming. Did she see you coming? Mr. Gillespie. But I'll tell you, one experience of hers is pretty hard to explain. Mrs. Peavey had a dream one night. Everybody has dreams. I have them all the time. I know. Even cats have dreams. Well, I wouldn't care to dispute you on that, Mr. Gillespie. But I was telling you about Mrs. Peavey. She dreamed one night that there was a very bad thunderstorm. Yes. Well, as a housewife, Mrs. Rantum, I don't have to tell you what a thunderstorm does to milk. Turns it sour. Exactly. I suppose the next morning you woke up and the milk was sour. No stranger than that. The next morning the milkman delivered it to a bottle of buttermilk by mistake. Peavey, I wouldn't have believed it if you hadn't told me yourself. That's not all. The night Mrs. Peavey dreamed about the thunderstorm, there was a thunderstorm. So she wasn't dreaming at all? That's what I say. There are a lot of things in this world you can't explain. Peavey, if you believe that, you believe anything. I suppose you believe in ghosts too. Well, I wouldn't say that. I wouldn't say I don't either. I suppose you believe this story about the old Burton place now being haunted. The Burton place? How on it? Well, people have heard some strange things going on in there. Nonsense. Just because a man happens to murder his wife? What's strange about that? Murder? Well, that was some years ago, Lila. Don't tell me you're superstitious too. Cosh not, Drachman. Don't be silly. Well, shall we be going? Oh, yes. Let's get started. Oh, gracious. I'm forgetting what I came in for. I'd like a jar of your cucumber sundae and cream, please. Very much so, Drachman. We've had a little more demand for that than we expected. We've just run out of it. You must have run out of second sight at the same time, P.V. Goodbye. Goodbye, folks. Have a nice picnic. You know, I never realized you were such a wonderful cook. Well, the only thing we had that was cook's rock heart was the hard-boiled egg. I know, but they were wonderful. Well, I must say, I never saw a man put away so many. Are you sure you had enough? I couldn't eat another thing. Why, have you got some leftover? No. Well, what shall we do now? I'll tell you what. I'll race you down to the brook. Oh, Leela, race. I couldn't. I bet you can't touch me, Drachman. Oh, don't, Leela. I'm too full. Come back over here and lie down on the grass beside me. All right, then. Right here, huh? Oh, this is nice. Look at those clouds up there. Aren't they beautiful? Uh-huh. Like little woolly lions. Uh-huh. Drachman. Uh-huh. What are you... what are you thinking? I wish I'd eaten one less pickle. This is no time to be thinking about pickles. Isn't it gorgeous up here on this hill? Oh, yes, it is. And isn't it a gorgeous view? Yes, it is gorgeous. And that little clump of trees down below there with a white house nestling among them. Gorgeous. Drachmorton, you know what? I believe that's the Burton house. Huh? Yeah, I guess it is. What do you say on our way home if we stop off and just peek into it? Now, Leela, you know what you said. I know, but we have to pass there anyway just for many. But we couldn't see anything, Leela. It's all boarded up. Yes, I suppose it is. You know what? I believe... wait, I'll look in my handbag. Yes, sir. Now, what do you think of that? What? I just happened to have a key to the house. Judge Hooker left it with me. Now isn't that a coincidence? All right. Let's get it over with. Broken in here, Leela. All this mess around. Now, wait a minute. Close your eyes. Why? I want this to be a surprise. Let me take you home. No tricks now. All right, open them. Now, this would be your band. Looks like the house of representatives to me. Don't you like it? It's too big, Leela. The whole place is too big. Oh, but I think it has charm problem. And I think it has definite charm. Yeah, it has gloom too. It's as dark as your hat is here. Well, the shutters are closed, silly. I know, but I like a place with plenty of light, Leela. I like a place with people around. Did you hear something, Justine? Sounded like something falling. Drive, Martin. Where did he do it? What? Mr. Burton. Where did he shoot Mrs. Burton? How do I know? I wasn't there. I mean here. This time I know I heard something. Well, Leela, don't get frightened. After all, you're with me. I wish we'd never come in here. I wish I'd... Listen. It's in that closet. What? Whatever it is, it's in that closet. First I'm going to lock that thing in the closet. Hold on. You've got nothing to be afraid of. Shall we go? Oh, yes. I never want to come near this house again. Let's get away from this awful place. Leela, you stay here. Now that you're safe, I'm going back in the house. Leave me alone here? Oh, you'll be perfectly safe here. I'm going back there and find out what that was. Oh, Trump, Martin, I wish you wouldn't. Remember, if anything happens, Judge Hooker has my will. Now be careful. I thought that kid was scared to death when he heard me lock the door. But he thought I was never coming back. All right, Leeroy. You can come out now, Leeroy. Leeroy, come out of there. Leeroy... Oh, it's empty. That's funny. Got a swan, it was Leeroy. Sounded like Leeroy. Oh, my goodness. Leeroy! Here's our cheese company. And I'll invite you to listen again next week for the further adventures of the Great Gilders League. One of the wartime problems you homemakers face is that of keeping meals from seeming skimpy. So here's a suggestion. When you're planning a vegetable dinner or when you have just a small amount of meat for the family, serve the vegetables or meat in a cream sauce in the center of a delicious macaroni and cheese ring. And make that ring the quick way with Kraft Dinner. Each Kraft Dinner package contains a special macaroni and some Kraft grated. It takes just seven minutes cooking and you have fluffy tender macaroni with cheese goodness through and through. For the ring, you merely press the hot Kraft Dinner macaroni and cheese in a mold for just a moment. Still easier is Kraft Dinner served as is without fixings. Kraft Dinner is nourishing, economical, and so good. A box of it gives enough macaroni and cheese for a family of four and takes just one single red ration point. Notice that one red ration point for Kraft Dinner. Ask your dealer for Kraft Dinner soon. Thank you very much.