 Uh someone do an awesome... potential that people have been waiting for this for so long... someone do an intro that's really really bombastic. Go on! Bump, bump, bump... Who'd you bring me? In a world starved of superhero content... There came... ...that woman. ...in a world starved of heterosexual relationships... In downtown Chicago. and you liked Iron Man? You like Captain America. Now, prepare for Batwoman. No, you didn't. You didn't like Captain America. You didn't like Captain Marvel. You absolutely hated Rey from Star Wars. Get ready to detest Batwoman in season two. Oh my god, here we are. Season two, episode one. We ended on a nice note for our finale with the other one. Das Bolsheet edited a whole nice little like, yeah, we did it, but it's back. And we got this show for what? It's one per week and it's like 20 million episodes. So this will be a nice chunk of content. Oh, no, I think this is only 13 episodes. What? It's cut down season because of... No. No. That's really sad. I really like Batwoman. That's why they've all come out in January, February. Well... Fuck you, it's January. Here's Batwoman. Well, I was going to say, like, does that mean that Marvel will be making more shows than the CW? Like, damn. Marvel's going to take... Batman and Lewis next. Oh, that'll be great, I'm sure of it. Don't you mean Lewis if they want to keep continuity? Lewis. Oh my god, Superman's there with Lewis. With Lewis? With Lewis. Did you just say Lewis? It's even Lewis? With Lewis. Yeah. With Lewis. When we hit him to say that, we were like, is there another character called Lewis that he's referring to? Like, is this a mistake? I'm like, no, he just fucked up and to hell with making a second take. So, I think it would be important to give a little bit of, you know, so some people haven't seen season one, you know, some people watching this right now would be like, oh wait, season one, I missed that, damn. So what happened? It's like, well, Batman abandoned Gotham for quote-unquote reasons and Batwoman randomly just fucking steals everything of his. I can't even remember how she did it. She just stole everything of his. She just went down into his Batcave, finding it immediately and just said, yeah, this place is mine now. She walked into Wayne Enterprises and just went, this is mine now. Yeah, she returns, apparently is allowed to take control of the building and all of Wayne's assets. Naturally. She takes all of his money. It's like there's got to be some kind of limitation here legally. There has to be somebody. Yeah, he asked her nicely not to go down there. Not to mention she bullies Bruce's slave boy. Yes, yes. In every universe, even the alternative ones in the multiverse, he's just the lackey to somebody else. Well, that's the thing. We only got to see him in his prime once. Only once. We only got to see Ripped Luke for like three minutes. Ripped gun tooting Luke. Oh my God. That front of his face. Wow. Oh, it's Luke. I'm KK and I'm Bruce's cousin. Yeah, no. Yeah, that's more sensible than the actual Luke. Bring this Luke in, please. I need this Luke. What that means is that actual actor Luke is like a super ripped guy and he has to play this dirty loser for the real show. Well, for one short, tiny, bright, shining moment, he's like, I could be myself. There's a hope there that one day he will become, you know, batwing or whatever the fuck. You'll see him. That's the biggest demo reel for his neck. It's like, yeah, just ignore the rest of the show. Just look at me in this episode. Look who I am. He has been the only person who has been involved, at least recurring character, who's been involved with a legitimately good scene in all of Batwoman. I think in Grand Total, there's probably like three good scenes in season one. I can't remember what they are, but then he was in like two of them. I think. What would you say they're three? What are the... That was me being very generous. I can't actually remember. I think there's only the one. I could only tell you the one. The one with Luke and the prison guy. The prison guy were in Luke. That's the only good scene in the whole series I can remember. Yeah. It was such a surprise. Well, I do remember when Batwoman opened up a gay bar to spy to restaurant owners. I do remember that bit. That's what I would say. If anyone was like, I can't watch this without the context season one, go watch all the coverage everyone here has done on it. You'll have a laugh. It doesn't. It's not going to matter. I was going to say, we've already described the plot of the majority of the season. So what's left? There's a person called Alice. That's Bruce Wayne. Pseudo, Doppel, Bruce Wayne. Oh, we'll remind me of that. So there's basically nothing that you need to know from first season because the writers don't give a shit either. No. Anything that you see that will be referenced will be pulled out of their ass randomly on a whim for an episode. But I suppose really the only thing that you need to keep in mind is that Hush was given a new face. Just go with it by Alice. Yes. To make him look like Bruce Wayne. And so... And you might say, I asked you to wait for them to drag him through the dirt. Absolutely. They're probably not legally allowed by Warner Bros or whoever to do it to the actual fake Bruce Wayne. They have to make a fake fake Bruce Wayne so that they can do it that way. Yeah. I don't think they're allowed to shit on Batman because I bet that happened in the writers room. They were like, yeah, and then Batman's going to like, I don't know, get dumped on by white rhinoceros and there's some suit just shaking his head. That's just... Look, we can't do that. Who knows if they're even going to follow up with any of that shit. It'd be great if he died straight away because I just don't want them to... I really... That's the one thing that will probably piss me off if they do it. They both ground the sewers in between seasons. There you go, I fixed it. On that note, I was just going to say like, because you know the idea is like they want to protect Batman. It's like, well, halfway through the season, they just casually announced that Batman killed Joker so it's okay that Kate Kane kills people. Yeah. They destroy him in a more subtle way without him needing... My degrees. They learned their lesson. You can't just outright kill them. Yeah, you can't just have them get kicked with their face by a monkey. You're going to have them slow and direct. I know that we've talked about it relatively recently. I just want to remind everyone Ruby Rose's Kate Kane was Batwoman. She isn't now, but when she was Batwoman, they did the crossover. There's this storyline where they needed seven Paragons and they were all Paragons of something. For example, Supergirl was the Paragon of Hope. I don't remember the rest, whatever. So they needed to get Batman because he's the Paragon of Courage and they go to... Yeah, it is an alternate universe, right? That's how it works. And they find a Batman. This is the closest they've come to in Batwoman continuity. I don't even know how to deliver this if anyone doesn't know it, like how fucking frustrated this is. So they get there and things aren't what they seem. Batman's got like an exoskeleton suit. He's injured and he says something like he killed once and he can't stop killing. He can't kill just one. And so, he explains this to our Batwoman like you just got to kill everything before it ever kills you. And she's like, no, I choose Hope, or some bullshit. And she finds out that he killed his universe as Superman, you see. And kept his clock, Kent's glasses as a trophy. And so Supergirl is like, fuck you, you killed Superman. And then he punches her with a kryptonite infused fist. Yeah, in case other Superman come from different dimensions to his house, he's always ready. And so he compels Batwoman to kill Supergirl because, you know, she could destroy the world maybe. And Batwoman refuses, pushes him, and he falls into a, I don't even know, like a circuit thing. Yeah, some kind of generator. And he gets electrocuted to death. Batwoman killed Batman, the paragon of courage, because he was too bloodthirsty and was killing everyone. I think everyone. Now, moving on from that, we are sad in the storyline because that means the paragon of courage is now not possible to be in the team, but they reveal to us. Yeah, don't worry, not all hope is lost. They reveal to us that the true paragon of courage is in fact Batwoman Kate Kane. Oh my God. Oh my God. And so, literally a shaking. And so the world is saved. Fuck Batman. Yeah, fuck the other Batman. He wasn't the paragon of courage. He was an asshole. Fuck that guy. It's not like two episodes later that Kate Kane kills someone. They just tied up man in full blood. Now, this is the big, the big Anvil to drop. You might have thought from listening to that if you had no context of it that sounds pure awful. Do you know who played Batman in the classic animated series? A lot of people like Kevin Conroy's Batman. It's pretty awesome. Great voice. He's not played a live action Batman ever, to my knowledge. So he was brought in to the crisis of infinite Earths to play murderous, crazy Batman. And then he was killed by Kate Kane. Oh. What? Wow. All right. What an epic fight scene. You bringing Kevin Conroy to do this? Yeah, like this really bugs me actually. Wow. Oh, wow. Wow. Okay then. Oh, a God of courage. And then she left the show. Yeah, that too. But like, I can't even get how this isn't more outrageous than potentially than Luke it sounds. Like not because of course bringing back the classic characters in the sequel trilogy, just to shit all over them was annoying, but the one time Kevin Conroy was a live action Batman. You killed him because he was a murderer. Wow. So he's staggering, staggering stuff. And yeah, the big payoff to that is that she's also been known to have said that Batman ditched Gotham, but she won't. And she is the Paragon of Courage, but Kate Kane is not in the show anymore. Ruby Rose left. She ditched Ruby Rose. They're going to have to be... They're going to have to be... I wrote one in common sense because she got the fuck out of here. Yep. Well, should we, now that we're sort of on the subject, should we maybe take some guesses, take a little poll as to what the explanation is that Kate Kane is gone? Kidnapped. You know, I think Kidnapped is... I think... That would imply that we're going to see her again. She's gone missing. She's driven off a bridge or something. She's gone missing. Yeah, there's going to be title crawl before the episode. I don't see it. 18 has vanished. I don't expect much information on it at all just so that they leave it open in case Ruby Rose decides to come back. They're like, she's missing. We don't know why or where. She was on a mission. No, I know, but they, because they made a big deal about how they're not going to kill her. We are not going to kill her off. That would be horrible. It's like, all right, all right, all right. So I reckon she'll just be missing. I am going to guess that offscreen, she goes to a different Gotham in the universe so that she can still defend Gotham, but it's a different Gotham. Like she goes with Supergirl and everything. Yeah. Yeah. Gotham. Oh, you mean like, she's fighting really? She actually is fighting. Yeah, she's out there fighting. Yeah. She's just not in the show and we'll never show her, but she is out there fighting. Don't you worry. Oh dude, if the new one says like, this is what Kate would want for me to protect this world or some bullshit, I don't know. Yeah, I also think we're going to rush right into her becoming Batwoman. It's probably going to be quicker than the first episode. Yeah, don't think about it. Just do it. I'm going to call it. I reckon that she's going to be Batwoman before the halfway mark. Yeah. Why would you do it? Because she came on within 15 minutes. That's optimistic. I don't know about that. I'm going to say, she'll at least assume the Batwoman role by the end of the episode. I'm not certain about the guess. Everyone's predictions for when she will be suited up and fighting some form of crime. I'm going to go with 20 minutes. 30 minutes. I'm going to, I'll do you there. I'll go for 10. 15. 15. I'm guessing for the act three. All right. My guess is a little odd, but as I said, I think she'll be doing the thing, but she won't have the suit until next episode. Nah, she's definitely getting the suit. I think she's absolutely going to get the suit this episode, but I will put that prediction on. Maybe. I want to be at least the one person who guesses that because even though, I think they did it. If this was season one, I'd totally say that. I think it's season two and they've done that before with the first new Batwoman. So I think they're going to wait. They're going to really, really hold it in and wait till the second episode to give her all of the bad stuff. Okay. Listen to what you've just said. I'm going to change my mind because you've taught me out of it. All right. Five minutes. The only way to see that happening if it's a flash forward. Should we find out then? Metal and Jay Longbone's predictions. Last two. 25 minutes. All right. Oh yeah, I said 15 minutes. 15, shit man. We got more of a place. This will be great. I'm an outlier here. All right. All right then. This is real exciting as you guys can see from listening. We've got a full cast here today. We don't intend to do this for the whole season. This is more of a special launch of season two because everyone here is going to have different things to cover and different timelines and time zones, all that shit. But this, it's like when they hit the bottle of champagne or whatever against the ship. This is a huge, wonderful occasion. I'm really glad you're all here. This is 42 minutes too. It is indeed. Yeah, a decent amount. But yeah, my boy Pussy's quivering. I'm so excited. Alrighty then. Oh, excited. Oh yeah. KK locked up the horrible villain and she felt guilty about it. She cried. She did a jump for once. Yep. You make me Bruce Wayne. How is he going to be able to sound like Bruce Wayne? You know how to be Bruce Wayne, right? You know all of his stuff and... All his mannerisms. You're just going to write it off. Yeah. I don't even know. She's already got the suit. She just first sat at the back. Opening is just talking to someone about how... I found this weird suit. Why are her lights on? Isn't that going to drain the battery? Yeah, why would you want lights on in your sleep? Well, she's rich. She's rich. Lots of rich people leave that out. That can't be a battery powered lamp because it's too fucking old. So she's gotta be running off juice. Your mom's taller than her. She's having to flash back in a dream. A flashback in a dream in a van on a pier. With the lights on. Oh no. No, no, my house exploded. Dude, I swear to God. If that's like... It's in me. It's in me. Dude, if that's just the bat suit, this is going to be hilarious. Oh no. That very real plane is crashing. Back here to Batwoman. You online? Hello? Did anybody hear me? Hello? Oh, was she in the fucking plane? Dude, I just want to see Ruby Rose's corpse splatting across them. But it's her just totally normal, just laying down, open eyes and everything. I guess she's dead. I think. She's so cold and lifeless. I can't tell. It's just going to be amazing if the suit's in the racket. The guy's like, hey. Wait, what? Whoa, what the fuck? She's got some... There's mystery to this character. Come on, Liv! Come on, Liv! Oh God, she yelled, Liv! Liv! That's what... Is that what you have to do? All right. Maybe she's already at the scene. With her cones off? Are you sure she flew in from National City this morning? Wait, so Batwoman was supposed to be on that airplane? No, they don't know she was on it. They're not going to kill her off. No way they'd do that. Well, she'll be missing, right? Because the plane... I expect a smack in my chest like that. She'll just do this. What? Oh. Are there like body parts everywhere? Okay. Vomit equals drama? She vomited because the tramp stunk like shit in piss. Oh, no. He just slowly does that. It's not that bad. He tries to grab her. He's my only pair of undies. Maybe the fact that they're starting out with a more pathetic lady right now shows that she might actually grow and stuff. Oh. Uh-oh. Oh, no. Someone died in that plane crash. We're only four minutes in. No. I win. I win. No, no, no. She's got to fight crime. She's got to fight crime, too. Oh, damn it. Does she have to put it on first? Yes. She's got to put it on and fight. But that was the requirement, like throw a punch. Can I get half a point? Well, I mean, yes. There's no way. Are they killing her off? Oh, no. Where is Kate's plane? It's on the beach. What are you guys doing through together with this one? Is it just going to be an empty suit? No, but I didn't think they'd kill her off. No, no. No, she's not in it. Right? Or is there a... How does it make sense? Oh, my goodness. She's the bat suit. She just took off the bat suit. Did Ruby Rose vaporize? He literally finds the suit. You ran to the plane crash. Did she explode out of the suit? What the fuck? Hey, she left it. She was in a briefcase. Well, she's so skinny. He probably just squeezed out it. This suit looks so cute. Oh, dude. We have five minutes in, and she has found the bat suit. Yes! Right. You've got five minutes to put it on, girl, and start fighting cream. No girl, no. She's just found it. Right now. I want to win this. Yeah, I was going to say, if it takes just over two minutes, it'll be drinkers win, not ours. Okay, so just so that I understand what happened there. Nice character. The plane crashed. They just crashed into the pier right next to where she was sleeping. That's what happened to her. Call you if we find anything. I am not leaving here without my daughter. Okay, apparently Kate was on the plane and Jacob... He's the head of Crow Security since when the fuck does he have to... Yeah, he's... They usually control these things. The Crows have been in charge of the police, essentially. Yeah, that's when they were brought into Gothenwood. So, yeah. But they're gonna... Oh, my God. Everyone's really upset because KK's plane crashed. Did she see it crash with me? Dude, that's gonna be the season where we'll discover like who crashed it and why. I get that it's a super super 10,000 feet is still a hell of a free fall. She can fly in it. Do you not remember the first episode of the first season? How could you mean nothing to her? No fucking way. I came as soon as I heard Kate Kane died. She's more important. It's been four years, Bruce. Where have you been? The answer was as simple as the question. I think it looks all right. Looks all right. Well, how is he faking the voice? Hush can't fake voices. Oh, he hushed every voice that he changed to because of... Well, no, because it was... Oh, fuck it. That mouse is power. Yeah. They're fucking up the powers now. So, the issue here is that they're gonna like legitimately rob us of Jacob Kane finding out that Kate was Batwoman when she's not even in the show. I mean, yeah, I'm assuming we won't have that payoff anymore. Yeah. Yeah, they just like... That was the big setup. And then she just fucks off. You guys are talking while I'm laughing at Bruce Wayne's facial expressions. Okay. All right, then. So, Ryan... You know they live in a world where people are constantly faking their faces. She got in trouble for that fake murder. All right, that's the story here. She's a parole. Because I don't have a home. Because no landlord wants to rent to an ex-con on post-release. No one cares that the dope wasn't mine or that the crows were dirty or that I'm actually a decent human. She gets dressed up really well for a homeless lady. Okay, okay. They said she was a drug runner, right? But now she's saying, like, drugs were planted on her by the crows. Yeah. So, she's already over here. She's blind. She's blind. She's clearly going to be a victim. So, come on. And I thought it was pretty fucking funny. She was just in, like, a horrible wreckage and she was happy about finding the batsuit. Dude, they've, like, expedited her character to, like, 10 minutes. They're like, all right. So, she's really, she got PTSD and also she was wrongly convicted and now can't get a job. And she's got the batsuit in five minutes. I mean, I feel like she's better characterised than these two. I don't even know who these people are called. What are their names? The blonde ones. That's more like, how dare you disparage lesbian one and lesbian two? Well, you know, lesbian one was KK. You know, the, like, little acting segments that you sometimes get before a porn scene. Like, this is what this feels like. It's really like, ah, we've got some lines. Okay. I can send more men. This is my daughter, commissioner. I am not giving up. Oh, dude, Grace Scott. What are you doing, man? This is my daughter. Why are you in this show? Oh, he's acting. Do you hear that? You know, because someone has to act in this show. What you bring me, buddy. Luke and Jacob have to split up because there's a minuscule amount of acting in this show. I'm going to, I'm going to predict that Jacob gets killed in season two. Actually, I think I throw a push for season one. I'm surprised he's still here. He'll go missing. Season three will start with a four by four blowing up and then his mobile phone just being left on the side and his hands and his shirt. An horrible skateboarding accident. That woman is missing. They're like so endlessly optimistic making this show like every actor who's got some kind of career after this shit and like they won't have the balls to kill them off. It'll be like, oh man, so many people have gone missing. Some people get on airplanes. Don't worry, they might come back one day. Keith hunted all of her own and Bawood was her idea. Okay, it's not the type to sit idle while her sister's upending Gotham. What's wrong with his fucking mouth? You know Alice's best? Of course. They are my cousins. Luke. And why didn't you do anything about this this whole time? Luke, remember face people are throughout the show. In fact, this is why Kate flew to National City. You have that pocket? Wow. That's literally what he's there for. That's amazing. I just got this plot device for you here. Do you want this plot device? You want it? I don't want it. It's strong enough to penetrate the bath suit. Yeah, but that's not true though. Why do they keep saying it's the only thing strong enough? We've seen episode three's plot was about this. What if he thinks it's a jolly rancher and just eats it? Oh, she's the space flavor. Dude, it would be really awesome if the truth is revealed and then he goes to punch Luke, but Luke rips his shit off like you want to go. It's weird how he walks in and the first thing he notices isn't... Oh, wait, so I'm afraid as you can't win, but no, it'll be Jay Longbone. Jay Longbone's the closest to being the winner right now. If she fights crime, is she going to fight crime? We're 13 minutes in and she's in the fucking bath suit. Wow, it fits. She really well. It fits. Any kind of explanation for why she's doing this. See, look, she was beaten at some point. That can't fit her. This woman has breasts. I'm sorry. That's just the way it works. It's a super suit, remember? Oh my god. Oh my god. God, the fucking head. What is happening? So, yeah, don't fucking show up putting it on. Also, no. Oh my god. Oh my god. Is she about to fight crime? The winner will be Jay Longbone. Jay Longbone is the winner. Look, she fucked it up. They're trying to make her look slightly inept, guys. Totally different from Kate. Oh my god, they're doing a boogie. I will fuck it with you. I am a serious threat to you because I'm going to fucking kill you and take pleasure in doing it. Holy shit. How many bullets do you have? Look how good their aim was. They didn't miss a single shot. The guy on the right had a dick shooter. Why don't criminals in Gotham know that that one's made of bullets by now? Hey Vinny, why don't we just shoot her in the mouth? Holy shit. Oh geez. Longbone just let her do the thing. Sir, you're fresh as shit. Why is she acting like pissed off? You're just trying to murder her. Also, her voice sounds real weird. I can't believe I guessed it would be 20 minutes and I lobeled it. Yeah. I should have stuck to 15. I should have stuck to 15. I would have won. She kicks him once in the chest and he's out of commission and he's four times her size. Hey, the suit is made of batmonium. Turn around, turn around, turn around, turn around. I thought it was Jacob for a second there. I was like, nice. Wait a second. That's not Bruce's tennis. You women. I raped two women. Score one for me. They probably would have won if they were conscious of the sexuality though. Right there. I got a hand to see a Tommy. What the hell are you doing here? Yeah. What are you doing here? Oh God. Is she drunk? She's acting. I guess she's sad because Kate's dead. By the way, she is quick and connet as a character. My end of the deal. Only thing stronger than the bat suit. I put it in this cabinet, which is slightly worse than Luke's pocket. We're 20 minutes in and this show is jumping around like a... We ain't 20 minutes in. We're 16 and a half. We're 16 and a half. We're 16 minutes in and it's just going boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing, boing. I love the idea that it went so fast you thought it was long. Just wait a minute. You could have shot her months ago when she was out of the suit. No! Yes, anytime she was out of the suit. You could have shot her. I said I wanted her dead. Oh my God. Her acting is incredible, man. Two whole things. All she does is the whole weird movements that are slow but fast. I'm sure Commander Cain found it. A scene would bring them together. Batty would get caught in his crosshairs. Why can't she just go and tell Jacob that Kate Cain was Batwoman? No, he wanted her to kill... He wanted him to shoot her with the kryptonite bullet. I don't know how she planned on making that happen. That is an extremely elaborate thing for you to set up to happen. Hey, Bruce. There's no steam coming out of the steam shower. Are you shitting me? Why? That was a bit extreme. Are you insane? Yeah, the answer to that would be yes. You bring Bruce Wayne back in his first night back in Gotham. There's a dead woman in his mansion. I mean, with your fingerprints on the knife? What sucks about that, by the way, is what she just did was really horrifying. She's probably choking on her own blood as we speak. Like, just on the stickers. But oh well. I mean, he could just kill you. Having a Bruce Wayne that you essentially have leverage over is an insanely valuable asset. Even more so than your regenerating gang of gaggle fucks. Not to mention, by the way, why is she upset in the scene? She wanted Jacob to shoot her with the kryptonite bullet. This has nothing to do with Tommy Elliott and Bruce Wayne. That's some ugly walls. Oh my God, why do we need a scene with Sophie? To remind you, she's a character in the show. There is a political batwoman who's new to the show. It would probably help if you focus on building that character first. She was fighting crime in 14 minutes. Yeah, that is... Fuck about a fucking scarf, please. I fucking dare you. Before she left, Kate said that if anything ever happened to her, I should check her safe. And delete her browsing history. She was looking at straight porn at six fuck. Disgusting degeneracy. Kate? Kate! You're alive! Kate! You were charting the explosion! Oh my God! Oh my God, Kate, you're black! You're not amazing! You saw our plan go down, put two and two together. Oh, yeah, that's... Okay. Yo, stolen Valor March. Why? Dude, why are you guys chilled with this? I wish she not. Oh yeah, don't tell her. Don't take it off. I love they have to cut between it as well. Ryan. And I'm not done. Wow, she's giving her identity up immediately. What? Her identity is a hobo that sleeps on the water's edge in a caravan. Dude, she just threw shade at... Yeah. Kate Kane. Sorry, what? What? That's... What? That can't be what you meant. That can't be. Maybe she means like an orphanage. What's that got to do with anything? What? No, like... This bitch literally said, I deserve to be a hero because I'm black. Well, she just... That's basically it. She just went, I'm black and I got born to a black woman who died in childbirth like, unfortunately, lots of women do. Oh no. No, but they can just shock it whenever... They can just shock the suit. They have full remote control over the suit. We know this. All they have to do is shock it. No, that's the... Bro, there's a hole there. It's a plot hole. Oh right, Alice completely... You just got home. Exactly. She was squatting in my house. She must have figured I was gone for good. Now look before you barge in there and start mucking up all my furniture. I'd prefer not to tend up on her kill list. You didn't hear this from me. It looks like a bottle head. Are you drinking my whiskey? What? Wait a second, why'd you break me? You might be a dead woman. Bruce, what did you and the eagle? The eagle. The eagle? Daddy practically raised you and I think he thinks you're dead. Good point. Yeah, I'll clear that up. Well, he's at home in Glasgow. These people are all incredibly stupid. But yeah, she is not actually in Glasgow. Does that mean that he's going to get killed very soon? That would make me happy. Just get rid of him. Get him out of here. It's something we've talked about before where I joined a Discord call and I'm just like, movies? What are movies? And you just casually explained to me what movies are. Oh, you don't raise an eyebrow at all. He's like, okay. That would be nice. 56 floors up. Talk about optimal sunlight. Don't look at me like that. Oh, no. He's talking to a plum like a dickhead. You're doing the scene where they each learned about somebody else. In our statement, Kate said, it's paradoxical to fight on behalf of an institution that sees my sexual orientation as an enemy. Okay. That's kind of badass. Oh my God. I'm gay. I'm gay. I'm gay. Wait a second. She knew the rules before she joined. So why did she joined if that's what she thinks? Is it just her getting caught? So it's not actually a principal position. That's just what she said after she got caught. Why is she speaking out loud while she's reading? She's on her own. You have to show that the new Batwoman can read. She's running with the plant. Come on. And ironically, the plant has better acting. Apparently, when Ryan and her adoptive mom walked into their new apartment, they startled a bunch of squatters, buildings, landlord, and Ryan's mom were killed. What the hell is this? What the? How are you involved? Oh my God. Oh my God. It's all connected. So how have Alex left her alive when she killed that bitch on the stairs in an instant? Oh my God. This show is so shit. That's why she wants the suit to go after Alice. Because Alice inextricably left the new Batwoman alive. I love how she literally just explained what we just saw. She said mommy lives. We now know the entire backstory and motivation for the new Batwoman. This is the plot. Alice is the reason why her life is awful. Well, I mean, there we go. Dead and dusted. I can't do it. We're like 25 minutes. Come on. This is the longest 25 minutes of my life. Dude, this is so bad. This is actually terrible. This is all so shit. Who wants to kill me so I can watch this shit anymore? That's the thing. That's crazy. Juan, isn't it? That was next to her mom when she died. That's the way she talks to it. I don't want to sound like a typical white male, but smile darling for fuck's sake. Look at that. Wow. Why didn't they view because they were like eight dudes beating the shit out of you? She wants justice. So do we just let anybody who's been wrong wear the bat suit? Is that what the rule is now? Anyone who has had injustice done to them they can wear the bat suit. Oh, and there's got a connection to Alice. Case dead. Yeah, you cry some tears, my friend. He's acting. No. He's acting. He's trying to savor it. Look, don't act in her name. Not in her name. No, he's doing this for him. Maybe he's just really happy she's gone. He's chattaling that. Yeah. On the inside he's thrilled that this weird Bruce is back. But Bruce Wayne's return to his organization has been turned to a gay estate agency. And to put your pain into something worse. She hasn't, like, that's her sister and she doesn't give a fuck. Even though last season it was all about trying to accept her as a sister. How come for you, you crying little bitch boy? Well, the actress forgot that this isn't like... Wait, what? How do you know that that's how that works? I guess she does that. She pressed the not button that was there. He didn't remember our codename for my father. The eagle? He made it out. Yeah, so I told him to ring Daddy at home and he's got a Jean Glasgow. Oh my God, she's smarter than we thought. Yay! Yeah, but I said what happened. I saw he had a drink in the commander's office around the glass for Prince. Oh my God. I'm so glad that you should have known... This kind of competence never happens in the show. They want him out. They want Bruce out of the show. He's gonna be out in the first week? I would love it if what happened was that the crew secretly put Bruce Wayne in and then Warner Brothers were like, wait, no, no, no, wait, no. You can't do that. Ow, he's got the Justice League coming out in March. Get this character out. They're like, wait, but it's not him. It's just so it's like, no, no. Not even the image of Bruce Wayne shall be turned if you can fuck with the old alternate universe. You could fuck around with Pat Conroy. Sorry, Kevin Conroy. I like the idea that they specifically saw me very angry about it. We're like, nah, I'm gonna I guess Luke... Luke is upset that he didn't manage to call it, which, yeah, you should be fucking idiot. Why would you do that? What? Are you just randomly shooting grenades at the walls hoping to find the Batcorp? All the Batcorp! What the hell? Oh my God, it's so shitty. So bad. What? Where did we find the Batcorp, man? No, right? They had him fail one shot first, so it makes a lot of sense. It just looks like a no-lub-motted car. That's not a Batmobile. Stop. Yeah, you guys probably should have left the keys. Surely you have remote access to it. Well, if you first you don't succeed, just try one more time and you'll find it. Oh man, are we gonna get a boss fight? Can we get Bruce versus Batwoman in episode one? Are we having a scene with do-grace-girl? Shooter! Shooter! Shooter! Shooter! Oh my God, confrontation 7000 between Jacob and Alice. Shooter, you've said everything that you've wanted to say to each other. If you know where she is, you tell me right now. Shooter, you know it's not gonna happen. This bitch has stabbed you and tried to kill you and do horrible things. And framed you for murder, so you had to move the bodies of the people that Ruby Rose murdered. corpse upstairs right now by the way a hooker is bleeding all over the state shooter shooter shooter shooter killer Jacob it doesn't eagle could go through anything yeah you don't even need one of those waiting use your brain commander a lesbian superhero who could have killed me a dozen times but didn't lesbian superhero oh my god I mean Jacob it was kind of obvious who batwoman was just saying oh we get another whiny monologue with fucking dude if she moves up to him and takes the gun please move back move back yeah please surprise me by shooting her just kill him no you let her take it what how fucking useless is this guy why is he alive Jacob what are you doing dude and then he goes upstairs and finds the dead woman on this yes I probably should have shot her back at Ryan back at Ryan well Jacob's been what is this music at the same time I can't wait they just now communicated that she was why didn't they tell her ages ago the car and he just left yeah it's a batmobile she's not gonna outrun the batmobile oh yeah really fucking mystery mobile oh my god you can't outrun a Toyota you know I said they've sped it up look they're the same speed panda for fuck's sake never mind the car is CGI I swear to god I know it is she couldn't outrun a Chevy spark in that thing you ain't running out the outrun of the batmobile missiles no the snack bar couldn't destroy the bad suit it's not a desert eagle does it eagle on the other hand it's not a desert eagle you're right I like the idea that there's a button in the batmobile that just shoots desert eagle why didn't you know can you hack the batmobile can you hack the batmobile ready missile number two I'm in he said it he said I'm in he's actually they decided to hack the car now took your fucking time Jesus why was that even a thing it could do did they try to do that get out it was never a second explosion by the way from the other rocket it just went to no way trying to search for the nearest snack bar and it's a mile away snack bar humming this she's gone in here gun where did he go oh he just he brought it down wait that means that means the gun was just in the car because he went to the car without a gun and yeah he just a different gun it's batman's favorite double barrel shotgun yeah what do you think he killed the joker with it was that batman doesn't like guns and he's just gonna fucking double barrel shotgun has he's got fucking missiles in his car wow really lucky none of the pellets of their face rupture alert what shotgun they don't die in a trade that's like the point of a shotgun wait is he put the kryptonite on the yeah he did he put the shotter with it but it didn't it's not even it's not even shaped into a bullet it's still just what the fuck how is she beating him up she's really good at fighting oh hit no hit plan shouldn't the face fall off oh it did oh i accidentally punched his face i literally punched his face yeah he doesn't know it's a fake face for all she knows she actually punched his face oh hey it's not bullet proof fyi it is you got shot with kryptonite where is it oh oh my god they're all just walking in the front the fucking wait it penetrated the bat suit it's just plastic for christ sake are we still pretending how did it get through the bat suit but she's okay because it was only a little bit the kryptonite rags it ruptured but it didn't he didn't go through it ruptured this thing it was stucking on the suit it told us that it would absolutely go through and kill her but it didn't but it just didn't and she's okay yep well she got shot he fired it out of a stupid fucking double barrel shotgun that would have exploded if he put it into the fucking chamber and fire no he wouldn't have yeah because you can do slugs with shotguns right okay absolutely then why didn't he why did he why did he don't even finish that sentence you know it'll take you nowhere good that road leads to nowhere good wait are we doing like are we doing the whole like i shouldn't be the hero and then she's like maybe you should only a real hero i shouldn't be the hero only a real hero is a lesbian because i know how you used to feel why are we having a scene with julia pennyworth and so why in the first fucking episode i used to be in love with her the boy hair cut her fuck boy mentality i loved it she got angry because her plant was killed she punched the guy's face off because the plant got smacked so i guess they went and got the batmobile and brought it back to the bat cave maybe is that missile still flying around out there somewhere dude the missile's looking for the kk every every snack bar and gotham lives in fear now so he's black when i'm gonna turn up and then new gray scots can be like i didn't know my daughter was black even when i did a damn good job of convincing you otherwise i'm telling you this is she hugging a leather jacket is that is the only thing that they found in the plane crash was her stupid fucking leather jacket it's funny because it's like all the characters miss his so much it's like why though oh my god it's aida wong oh everyone is looking at their contracts and crying how did you know that she would be there at this place at this time to the because carol and dries wrote it that oh sapphire did it kill the plane yeah well we solved that mystery he's dead but he's totally dead so after carol and dry he said that she didn't kill ruby rose's character she killed ruby oh no you just lay next to his rotting corpse rotting with maggots eating away at his pizza face right now is that the same actor he just moved yeah that's him dude they might bring him back then if they've gone as far as having him here yeah if he's in the first episode he's coming back he's gonna open his eyes and go yeah actually i didn't look zombie oh she repaired it thank goodness wow it's glue glue and she got the exact same fucking pot this is she glued it why would she not talk to the picture of her mother because the plant is her mother she put her ashes in the pot oh thank god i haven't been listening to a single thing in this episode is this the pothole oh she's yeah it's fucking die sweet tonight why did you not tell them about the kryptonite why did you not tell them that wait are they gonna like i know what this substance is and you're like i guess i'm not gonna what if they use this yeah what if they use that as an excuse to give her superpowers oh no superpowers if you could shot by kryptonite i definitely could do she's gonna be able to cast a lightning god that's over it's everything i thought it would be and more i'm so pleasantly yeah i'm very happy right now i've just come off the back of watching like kobra kai and the expanse like pretty good quality tv and then i come into this fuck man that was a culture shock you must be so impressed it's so incredible i love how they fast-tracked that's like a whole season's of with of content in an episode we i mean when we made our jokes about like oh she'll be fighting crime in the suit within the first 10 or 15 minutes it's like it's fucking really cool look at what and i said five to be funny and in five minutes she was holding the suit in her hand i gave him too much bread i thought that was gonna like he just whacked the um yeah the people who write this absolutely do not give a fuck she throws the battering at 1354 so yeah she is in the suit fighting crime in under 14 minutes yeah i am i'm closest was drinking i'm really glad that they got rid of first one wait sorry that's uh j longbow was a winner i forget it was it was drink was 10 minutes yeah job jill well i was half right because she's not she doesn't have the suit at the end and she's not bat woman so i'm half right i get half points no no all right i get half a point for saying for having the suit you know what that's fine that's fine not that's fine blowing out your candle doesn't make mine burn any brighter it's fine jas bullshit will decide how many points anyone has it's on the screen right now listen to me das listen to me she at the end of the episode did not have the bat suit and she wasn't bat women so i get half points for saying she wouldn't i get half points for saying she wouldn't have the bat suit and be fighting crime at the end no yes no sorry buddy it just doesn't work that way yeah i want you when you watch this episode it's about people who have had injustice done to them and this is injustice the idea that i don't get half a point so i need to be bat woman god damn it that was so bad i mean that's that's pretty remarkably awful like i didn't you want to know the uh do you want to know the ratings for this episode all right uh the ratings for the season premiere of bat woman season two was 0.663 with a demo of 0.1 uh zero um so why not get in bat woman season three i'm guessing oh no i think this was the lowest episode rating of the whole series to date i don't even know the really is a tax right off we will get many more seasons i was gonna say if it's strictly based on quality marvel are gonna destroy cw's chances because they're bringing out tv shows are so high now they're bringing out yeah i'm pretty sure wondervision has the highest budget of any tv show ever made so like yeah yeah they were they were talking like 200 million for the whole season weren't they about 225 million which means it's wow expensive then like that is serious cash yeah this was so bad the fact that we had like in 10 minutes she's like got the suit came in some plane that crashed into the middle of a field and also our new main character we've got all of this backstory and then the best one is that alice is responsible for it in fairness ringy alice has killed a lot of people that's true i mean and what's the body count up to now with the neck throwing the for that one little bit of smart um plotting where the girl kind of gives um fake bruce like a bit of like incorrect information and he swallows it and she's like oh yeah that's clued me in it's one of those things where i don't know if i can give him points for doing the obvious thing yeah yeah because you know that there's someone out there who could like make faces and wear faces and basically be anybody you know that person's out there because they don't know if mouse is dead so bruce wane just shows up acts really strange and no one's like all right so what's the password i gave you or anything like that that there's no there's nothing they're just a yeah sure he's the back cave in we go i i'm letting me wanted to get him out the episode as well they wanted one and out see if i'm ever like looking for a secret hatch or doorway or something i'm just gonna randomly pull up walls until i find it like i i love the fact that batman had a double barrel shotgun just sitting in the past why are we giving so much attention to that compared to his fucking missiles like it's just it's the it was for hunting he didn't get killed he might just cut he's not going to be bruce wane anymore they've clearly like been like oh shit we're not doing that that's not happening yeah what a surprise i absolutely could have guaranteed it would have been over in one i thought i thought they were going to do it i was so scared that they were going to do this for the whole season yeah i would have guessed that was the new big thing like they were really setting it up the reason why i thought that was what it gives alice access to so many resources and it's useful to make her a villain but they cut her off already now so that's the thing with this show except for alice they get rid of things real quick they just like blow through any plot i mean they got rid of ned flanders in like three episodes we thought he was going to be the big bad i just love that people can waltz right into wane enterprises right up to the they always have yeah since yeah basically like open door literally the always yeah kind of all are welcome here at wane enterprise what do we think about that this is how a bullet looks on on impact dude those special effects the just next generation oh my god those dobby after effects she should be dead there's no way if kryptonite goes through and it was a direct shot to what was essentially a heart it's like yeah you're dead well apparently they're trying to imply that he actually put it in some kind of casing i mean you would be so stupid as to not tip it with the kryptonite right i guess look i'm just i know you would want to take it with the game bar what's what's gonna happen to the gay bar is right is he gonna take it over is it or is it r.i.p gay bar um they're gonna forget about the gay bar for next week exciting episode listen i can i can understand why you think that they they almost forget about it in the first season but it's so good for like progression points it's like look at our gay bar we have a gay bar there's gay people in it like surely that that shit doesn't that doesn't have any that that doesn't hold a candle to a black lesbian batwoman fuck the gay bar we don't need that shit anymore they got a gay bar with a murdered white guy in it you can't get any more progressive than that that's true yeah i like this face no yeah i mean legendary content glad to be back yeah very nice thank you so much existence for this that was that was garbage i thought it was gonna get more boring without k came but i was wrong they're on the road to travel down they'll always find a way to travel down but yeah batwoman season two episode one a great start can't wait for more i guess we will i'll see everyone next week right well not you guys you guys go have fun before before you stop the recording one thing do you think they're watching our reactions because it's very very specific like the beginning when she when she first becomes batwoman and she uses the grapple she's all fucked up she doesn't know what the hell she's doing everything's malfunctioning and then there's later when mary and you know the chocolate nerd catch up with her and they're like we need the suit back they were like we need the suit back and she was like oh i can't co-op the suit but a bored billionaire white girl can like compensate like i'm like okay that's very similar like this yeah we agree with that kind of i think if they were going to if we were gonna ask are they watching our show right i think it's just because we are arguably the internet's largest batwoman fan community and i mean that i i'm actually serious when i say that it's pretty sure i i think that we actually are the only thing to compete with us is like the subreddit for batwoman i don't think it's as active as not very good i i think us on this call we probably make up about 60 of the actual audience well let me go to batwoman tv dc's bat woman on reddit yeah there are 9.4 000 members of it wow which is actually pretty small season two episode one live episode discussion has 813 comments but that was 22 hours ago wow oh you're right 22 hours ago posted pinned post about discussing the episode 813 comments 59 points sorry the show is so dead and the season premiere the first season was like what 1.2 1.8 1.8 million now the blaming the blaming the the nfl the terrible viewing figures but it's not going to get much higher even without the nfl no no i mean this was this was their opportunity to pop a rating to be fair i i don't really imagine nfl fans like conflicting much with batwoman well a wonderful adventure um absolutely thank you so much but anything else you guys want to say before we close out i'm droney three quarters of a bottle of midori what what we saw was something i'm so proud that there are people out there making this can i can i say as well like i was drinking constantly throughout this episode and before it and it somehow prevented me from getting drunk that's my god it's taking my power all right then see you next time folks boy yeah see you next time welcome back bye drink a leaf yeah i don't know what about exactly so why do you think you're worthy of wearing it because i'm black what'd you bring me