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Harry Potter's Scar - 2005 UQ Law Revue

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Published on Sep 18, 2006

Harry Potter tries to get a sex scene into Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, ruins the ending of Half Blood Prince, then pitches "Harry Potter: The Musical" to J.K. Rowling, by singing "Scar" by Missy Higgins. From the 2005 University of Queensland Law Revue.


My Dad was killed, my mother too, betrayed by Peter Pettigrew
I was orphaned, they left all alone
And before I knew of wizards affairs, I was at the Dursleys underneath the stairs
I could not wait, to bid that place adieu
A giant smashed down the door of a lighthouse
He said I was the boy who lived

'Coz aren't I Harry Potter? Did I come from a magic home?
Does it make me a wizard, despite having hormones?
But still I feel apprehensive, when everyone's scared of Voldemort
He went and killed off my parents, but me? He didn't get far
Still, he left me with this scar

On the Hogwarts Train, ate of lot of sweets, met Hermione thought she was a freak
And Malfoy, well he gave me the shits
At Quidditch catching snitches one by one, flying on my broomstick, boy it was fun
And I spent my spare time playing with my wand
I'm trying hard not to cheat on my OWLs
Or try to perve on Ginny's tits

But aren't I just a teenager, though I found the Philosophers Stone
and on the chicks I deliver, but how ugly is Ron
And though I might act peculiar, I won the house cup for Gryffindor
I found the chamber of secrets, and crashed a flying car
Still, at least I've got this scar


JK: Tits? TITS?! It's a children's musical, you can't say TITS!

Harry: Oh, come on JK, it's what I'm thinking. You know the kids today, they'll love it! It'll be like "EXPOSE! Inside Harry's mind!"...

... well, what if I said "norks" instead? "Norks" sounds magical!


I think I realized just in time
That Sirius Black was a friend of mine
Those Dementors sent chills down my spine
But my Patronus it did shine
I saw the Goblet of Fire then realized there was a movie, now I'm franchised
Tell me, did you think the last book was lame?

And someday I'll be an auror, maybe the best the world has known
I'm hoping that when that day comes
By then I might have grown
But to my astonished horror, I witnessed the death of Dumbledore
And I knew all along that Snape was a Death Eater
Still at least I've got this scar
Yeah, at least I've got this scar
Yeah, the chicks they dig this scar

--

http://www.jamestinniswood.com.au

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