 Well, surely God's goodness and surely God's mercy follows us all of the days of our lives. What an encouragement for you and I to know that God never allows a day to go by to where His goodness and His mercy is not involved in every detail of our lives. And that's the encouragement and reminder that you and I need that will give us a hope for today. Listen, I'm Matt and I'm joined here with Sydney, the two of us holding it down. Sydney, we got a great episode today. Tell me a little bit about it. We're really excited because you're going to get a firsthand look and eye-opening look into a place and a population of people that we need to keep in our prayers that serve us every day. There's about 1.4 million active duty service members in the US military. And what often goes untold, the spiritual journey of their spouses. In a moment, you're going to meet Jessica Manfrey, the proud wife of a US guard, Coastman. And she's going to share her journey of faith and explain how the book of Ruth in the Bible has helped her combat the challenges of military life. There's something we can all glean from Jessica's experience. And I believe her time with us today is going to give us a battle plan of how we can overcome challenges in our life, especially when it comes to loneliness. So I think, Matt, these are great opportunities. I love hearing people's stories and what they're walking through, and also the wonderful work that she is doing for the service members in our wonderful country. And so I think this is going to be a really great time to just hear her story, hear her life, and also learn things and glean things as well. Absolutely. I could only imagine what a military wife or mom goes through. I'm really looking forward to seeing the things that she faces. But I know it can be related to a lot of different things that we go through in lives, regardless of military or not. And I just want to encourage anyone that's watching at home right now. I've learned that regardless of what the topic may be, when you just come with an open heart, you're going to receive. And it might not be the word that you thought you want to hear, but it might be the word that God knows that you need in this current moment. So could you just open your heart to this conversation and say, I believe that God is seriously going to use this episode and this testimony to do great things today. And I love how you just said, like, open your heart. One of the things I know we love a lot here and something that is so near and dear to my heart is I love hearing people's experiences. I love hearing their stories and their testimonies. God puts us all in a unique position, a unique place. And in those hardships, in that adversity, that's when he begins to speak to us. That's when he begins to draw near to us. So no matter what the fight looks like, no matter what you're facing, because we are in Christ Jesus, because we are the ecclesia, we are the called out ones that God has a specific plan and purpose for your life. And we also just want to say, if any of you, if you have children, if you have grandchildren or sons or daughters, even a spouse of military, we want to say thank you so much for your service. And we're always here to pray. I know one of our producers here, she has a son that is, we've actually a producer and we have a co-host that has children in the military. And we just honor their service and sacrifice. And we just want to say, if you want to pray for our military, give us a call today. Let's all stand in agreement and pray at 888-665-4483. Well, our guest today knows firsthand the sacrifices and challenges that come along with it being a spouse serving our country. Jessica Manfrey is a military wife, licensed social worker and co-founder of The Foundation Inspire Up, a nonprofit that serves the military and first responders. She joins us today to share her journey of being a spouse to service members and the unique challenges she's faced and how God has helped her overcome loneliness. Jessica, we are so grateful to have you with us today. Oh my gosh, thank you for having me. Yeah, and it's such an honor and a joy. And so Jessica, tell us a little bit about your family and the life that you live being in the military. And we have some pictures to show too. Oh yeah, no, happy, happy to share. So I have been married to my husband for 15 years. Together, 18, we have a son, Anthony, he's 12, and a daughter, Reagan, she is five. Our journey as a military family has been in and out of struggle. You know, my husband is in the Coast Guard and there have been times, you know, he was on a cutter ship, as you know it, out gone deployed. And, you know, more recently, my son was the one who would have experienced it. My daughter hasn't and then sure duty. There's just different responsibilities that go along with different jobs that he's had over the years. But truthfully, I wouldn't change a thing. I think it's been a stronger. I love that my son has such a rich childhood. You know, my daughter may not remember much because we're heading towards the end of his service. But, you know, in his 12 years, you know, he's traveled all over this country. He's gotten to meet so many different people. There's been really, really hard times. I will not sugarcoat. He has faced some hard times. But this kid, I feel like he can weather anything. And I truly credit that to building the grit necessary as a military kid. We don't talk about it enough. That's just, thank you for just like sharing and being open. Like I don't think a lot of us even understand the challenges that go through. Because I mean, you're moving around, there's different things, there's transition. And, you know, one thing, Jessica, is that you have a passion for service members and helping them and first responders. Can you tell us about your nonprofit Inspire Up? Yeah, I'm happy to. So, you know, in 2019, I was recognized as the Coast Guard Spouse of the Year through Armed Forces Insurance. And it was radically transformative for my life. You know, it brought me to meeting, you know, Maria Reed and Samantha Gamoka also honored as the National Guard in Army Spouses of the Year. And really that year, we wanted to find a way to unite the branches and serve, you know, this country, this world really. And so we came up with Giving Tuesday Military. And what it was, if you know, Giving Tuesday, it's a day of giving, you know, it's a fantastic day to fundraise for nonprofits that are doing big things. But we wanted our SP based on kindness. So we activated ambassadors all over the globe and powered them to go into their community and serve. And the reality is when that day was over, we didn't want that to be it. We wanted it to be giving always. And so we decided to form, you know, a nonprofit. We named it Inspire Up On Purpose because it's not about us. It's about inspiring that next wave of generosity. And we truly, you know, I love, Samantha said this the first year we did this. She said, I wanna create the world that our children already believe exists. And it has never left my mind because when you think about the innocence of a child, absent of trauma, they don't know what we know. You know what I mean? When we turn on the news, we know what we're gonna see. Very often the child has no idea that there's ugliness outside in the world. So her, that quote of hers, if we're gonna build this, we're gonna show people that there is good in this world and it's gonna start with us. We have the power. I love that you think it's gonna start with us. We're inspiring up to give that kindness and that love of Jesus to others. And there's some pictures that you sent us. And we just wanna show our viewers. Can you take us through them, like what this picture is? Yeah, absolutely. So this is a banner. And I'm gonna take you back to August of 2021. There was a terrorist attack at Abbey Gate as we were drawing down from Afghanistan and we lost 13 service members. It is something that, you know, even now I get a little choked up thinking about it. Desperately impacted not just our nonprofit, but our military community. And we kind of rallied together and tried to figure out what we could do to serve and be the good, if you will. And what it came down to was contacting partners like the Robert Irvine Foundation and caliber home loans and saying, hey, we wanna feed these Marines. You know, the second battalion first Marines, they were there at the gate. They had the most casualties. And we showed up, you know, but Chick-fil-A is everybody loves the Lord's waffle fries. I'm sorry, but it's a thing. And when we put out, you know, the survey of what kind of food these Marines wanted, it was hands down Chick-fil-A. And this whole experience when we did this was absolutely incredible from start to finish. You know, we had Robert or David Reed, I'm sorry, they're not Robert Irvine, that would have been cool. But David Reed is also cool. He was there with us and he's actually a combat wounded veteran. He was a ranger in the army and lost a portion of his leg in combat. And he was just, you know, we showed up, but like having him speak to those Marines powerful. That's amazing like the work that you're doing and just even hearing about the military community and just the trauma that's going on and just your facing that I think a lot of us sometimes we're not in it. So we don't fully understand what you're walking through, what you're going through. And that's why I just really appreciate you wrote a book called Never Alone. Can you talk to us what inspired you about this book? Cause it's specifically to help people who are in the military spouses. Can you tell us a little bit about it? Happy to, and I'm gonna be completely transparent. I was forced to write this book. So Megan Brown is an incredible author and dear friend of mine. And she was already published under Moody and she just kept telling me, you have a book in you, you're gonna write a book and you're gonna write a book about your faith. And I was like, girl, I was raised Catholic. Like we are quiet, we sit, we kneel, we do what we're told. And like that it's not a loud, you know, experience but Megan radiates in her love for Jesus. She's just a firework. And so she's like, you're gonna do this and over lots of coffee crying, you know, I put together this proposal. And I mean, I knew there was no other topic I could write about, right? You know, loneliness is something that as a military community, we have faced. I can speak from my personal experience, you know, knowing that I moved all over this country, what I missed, you know, memories and time with family, you know, Christmases, all different holidays. I lost a lot of time. That is a huge sacrifice. And I gave up my support every time we moved. Just when I would build it, it would start over again. So loneliness was gonna be it. And then obviously, you know, I'm a therapist. So I wanted to bring in some clinical perspectives. But when it came to scripture, it really was over coffee in a Bible that I was like, it can't be anything but Ruth. You know, I was reading it and where you go, I go. I'm like, this is it. This is a life of a military spouse. Whether you say that their relationship, you know, is comparative to us and our service members, that holding that foundation of faith through anything or the relationships we build with each other because that at its core, those friendships, my closest friends, absent of the ones I've had since childhood, are military spouses. There's nobody else that can understand, you know, what I've weathered or who can be there for me in a way that it's just, it's been transformative for my life. So, you know, that's how the book happened. I was forced, but it was a blessing in disguise and I wouldn't change anything. And I think all of us have weathered loneliness. When you think about the pandemic and the isolation that brought, I started writing this book in 2020, you know, and in my introduction, I make it clear, yes, this was written for veteran and military spouses, but I promise you, you have experienced loneliness and it has profound mental health impacts. Let's just talk about for Jessica, because I think the loneliness I know, we've all had to like face different things of loneliness, but in military life, as a military spouse, it's a little, it's very different than what Mona and the officer used to. So can you take us through how, through those seasons of loneliness, how God walked you through and even how the book of Ruth, there were certain moments that really captured and inspired your heart in those low times. Yeah, you know, when you, when you look at the book of Ruth specifically and you go to, you know, the portion where Naomi loses her husband, then she loses her sons. Then I mean, we really see her lose her faith. She has bitter, she wants nothing to do with anything and she makes the decision to go back home. And not only does she do that, but she's pushing away her daughters-in-law. You know, we can read through scripture and understand that a part of her was realizing she had nothing more to offer them and why bring them with her when there was just, there's nothing waiting for you. I have nothing, but I like to go deeper and think you are an unhappy woman, you are lonely, and now you're gonna isolate yourself even more and push people away. And I think, you know, as a military spouse, you know, I personally have moved every two or three years. My husband has been short toured pretty much every single time we have been stationed somewhere other than maybe once or twice. So I've constantly heard, oh, we're gonna be here for four years. And in the back of my head, I'm like, okay, readying myself because it's not gonna be, you know, but there's so many lessons in this and that when you think about Ruth, a pagan woman holding faith for Naomi, like I couldn't imagine where I would be without the friends and family who have done that for me when I've been in heart seasons in my life where I'm questioning everything. Does God love me? Does he see me? You know, why is this happening? The why question is always out there when we're facing heart things. I have personally found redemption in the hardest parts of my story. And I think the biggest takeaway for me has been, this wasn't for me, it was so I can help to walk alongside someone else who's bothering it. I love that so much what you're sharing. And one thing I like that you mentioned is that like, even you had the roots around you to like hold you up in the midst of that when there's transition and change, I don't think we can really fathom that you're in a place for a couple of years, you're building community and then you're moving on to the next place and uprooting. I mean, that's a lot to go through. And, you know, one thing I really like that you just, you said, you know, even understanding how to wade through those feelings, wading through those feelings of loneliness, can you talk to us about that? Yeah, I think that we tend to, you know, as human beings avoid anything that's uncomfortable, if it doesn't feel that I'm not going to do it, we all have defense mechanisms that we, you know, utilize when we're in stress or experiencing something that's impacting us in a negative way. Don't put it in a box, unpack it, walk through it, it's going to hurt, but process it, right? That's the only way that you're truly going to be able to come out the other side. And, you know, being a Coast Guard spouse, I used a lot of water terminology and I'm not ashamed of that. And if you read the book, you'll know that I didn't even know what the Coast Guard was on my first date with my husband. And that is sad, because I grew up in Florida, very, very large area of responsibility for the Coast Guard. But, you know, I was 19, we'll just, you know, we'll forgive, right? But wading is truly that gentle. I encourage people to do it with a therapist, do it on your own with maybe a great, you know, cognitive behavioral therapy journal that can kind of, you know, prompt you as you go, but you cannot avoid hard things. God's not going to take them away either. We have to weather them. I so wholeheartedly agree, it's like weathering the storms of life, you know, no matter what it looks like. And I like something that you brought up also in your writings about like, God is in the eye of the storm, you know, growing up in Florida, you experienced a lot of hurricanes and there's a lot of storms we go through in our lives. So it's important to know that no matter what we're going through, no matter what we're walking through, that he is with us in the midst of it all. And Jessica, you know, as we're wrapping up our time together, what is a way that we, as the body of Christ, can support military wives, military families, what can we do actively to help you? I would say, and I'm borrowing this from Megan because, you know, she said it one day and I said, yes, as a local church, as a body of Christ, let us feel like we belong. And I'm speaking to the local churches specifically. A lot of times we feel like a warm body. If we don't show up, nobody notices. We're not invited to ministry and maybe there's some fear there. They know we're going to move. There's a lot. Truly welcome us. I'm going to give a shout out to Shiloh Baptist Church in North Carolina. They are the oldest Baptist church. They were essentially formed before we were a country. If I miss a service, I get a text from, you know, my pastor, are you okay? How is your family? They know my husband's in the military. They know, you know, my immediate family is not close by. This is what we can do. You know, just wrap your arms around us. Make us feel like we belong. I love that so much, Jessica, that I think that it's so important for us to keep our eyes on and being aware of military families and reaching out and being loved and being that support. We are called as the body of Christ to be family. That's what it's all about. Well, thank you so much for just joining us today, just sharing your heart and your passion. Thank you so much for your husband and his service to this country and just all that you're doing. We're just believing God's continued blessings and favor on your life as you continue to inspire up and as what you're doing for military families all across this country. It's such an honor to be with you today. Right back at you guys are awesome. Thank you for what you do. Thank you so much. Well, stay tuned with us because when we come back, we're gonna have a time where we're gonna speak and minister to your heart and your spirit and even talk about the battle plan for your life so you can be victorious and all that you do. Stay with us. We'll be right back. Remember your childhood joy and excitement when being invited to a party? You felt valued, included, wanted and ready to have a good time. Bestselling author Bob Goff believes that every day of life can be lived with the same childlike enthusiasm and sense of humor. Inside love does, you'll learn that love is a verb, not just a feeling. His insights and joyful reflections will help you discover what it means to live fully alive even as you serve others. Prepare to encounter remarkable stories from Bob Goff's life as he shares how living and loving to the fullest is the best way to make Jesus known in this world. Request your copy of Love Does when you give your best gift this month. Your gift today will help Cornerstone Television show the life-changing love of Jesus through Christ-centered TV programs. Call us at 888-665-4483 or give at ctvn.org slash donate. Man, what an encouraging testimony and interview we just had with Jessica, seriously. You know, I think we can all find times in our lives where we can relate. You know, she might be a military mother and might be facing something in a different light or experience, but we all have those moments where we might feel isolated, where we might feel alone, where we might feel like the weight of the world is on us. But the good thing is, God says that He'll never leave us, nor will He ever forsake us. But I love one thing that she talked about here, Sid, is tying it to the story of Ruth. Ruth's commitment and to name Naomi was kind of amazing and thinking about that in regards to relationships in our lives. Who do you have in your life that's able to kind of keep you going, right? To be your support system and at the same time, who could you possibly unintentionally be pushing away, right? And so let's start here. I love this in Ruth chapter one, verse 16, it says, where you go, I will go, and where you stay, I will stay. Wow, what a relationship Naomi has with Ruth here. And I think in times of loneliness, in times of difficulty, in times of uncertainty, one of the battle plans that we need are the people around us, right? The people around us are who we surround ourselves with or what's gonna help us to persevere, what's gonna help us to move forward. And maybe on a city in your own personal experience, what do you think about the right people, who's somebody that maybe you had in your life through a troubling time that's helped you to move forward? Yeah, Matt, as you're just talking, I just think about when it comes to war, you never see anybody going out to war alone. You never see it in an army, it's a group of people, we are surrounded with each other. Like even I think of one of my favorite names of the names of God is Adonai Savaiot. He's the Lord of the Angel Armies. But he's the Lord, but he got angels around him, the Armies, you know, there's like all surrounding. So that's what God is doing to fight his battles that he's equipping and he has all, you know, angels. We don't even know what that fully looks like. I mean, it's kind of like, when I just think about it for a moment, it's just like mind blowing. But even in our own lives, when we are walking through struggles and we're going through pain, when we're going through suffering, I know the one thing is the enemy loves to isolate. How do I know? Cause I've been there many, many, many times. You can ask my closest friends, like, where are you Sydney? I'll be gone. Like I'm not answering my phone, but I just really appreciate the people that have called the people that reach out. They're like, hey, I'm checking on you. Hey, I'm praying for you. And I think it is so important. And one thing I've learned, I've been very open, like going to therapy, just so my own traumas that I face in my life is that I remember my therapist told me that, you know, when you start to heal, there's you allow community to actually be around you. That is part of the healing process. So I think a lot of times as Christians, like, yes, it is like getting in our prayer closet and it's encountering the presence of God and standing on the word and reading the Bible and just feeding ourselves. But it's also God puts people on earth for a reason. We're not meant to do life alone. And so we just want to encourage you today that maybe you're in a season where you feel completely lonely. You feel completely isolated. Well, can we just encourage you today, reach out to somebody if you're hitting that low space, that low place where you feel like you can't go on. And I know sometimes like I've been in moments, Matt, where it's like, I don't even want anybody to know what's going on. I feel like I'm going crazy. Like I have all these thoughts. But the moment that I reach out, the moment that I say, hey, I'm like really going through something, it's amazing when people come around, they pray for you or they reach out or you go out to eat or whatever it may be, a community is part of the battle plan. Yeah, you know, I love the scripture that talks about those who isolate themselves, rise up against all sound judgment and wisdom. You know, and so there's, it's a dangerous place to be in. I feel like you're allowing the windows of the enemy to come into your life when you allow yourself to be isolated. You're allowing yourself to be in the enemy's playground. You know, and then the thoughts come and the emotions get involved and you're no longer really sensitive to Holy Spirit. You're just more so coping with your own emotions. And I love what you're talking about here. You know, so just not too long ago, just with my, with my own dad. You know, he, he's the type of guy. He's like, I don't need help. You know, I can do everything on my own. And I get that. Maybe most guys are, but he was going through a difficult time and he didn't, he, I remember him saying to me. So he's like, I didn't want to burden you. You know, to reach out. But I'm like, but dad, I'm your, I'm your son. You know, like I want to help. That's what I'm here for. I'll make time for it. But because he didn't reach out, he kind of fell into this like dark place. It's like depression, you know, this big, bold, strong guy. Regardless of how tough you look on the exterior, you can, the enemy can really use things against you. You know, and, but my thing was, is so I sat there with him and I was just like, dad, but I'm here just reach out, you know. And to your point for anyone watching at home, be careful you're not pushing anyone away. You might have family members, maybe you don't have certain family members. There's friends, maybe a church, a community, even us here at Cornerstone, which you can call us on our line at 888-665-4483. But the importance of making sure, I can't keep all this in. There are people that God places in our lives strategically that have maybe the experience, the wisdom, the knowledge to help move you through whatever it is that you're going through. Relationship and community is so, so important to see. Yeah, when you were just talking, Matt, and thank you for like sharing about, you know, with your dad, because I think there are moments where we see family members, we see different people, like we know you're struggling, but we wanna be here. And I just think of that scripture, she says, bear one another's burdens. That is what we are called to do as the family of God. And even just saying that I just saw like a vision when you're speaking, Matt, of just somebody right now, I just see like all these blocks, these like heavy blocks or like heavy bricks that are on top of you that are weighing you down. And even today is like just reaching out, call that person or what, it's like calling on God, but calling those people to say, these are the bricks that are on my back. These are the things that are weighing me down. I was in a season where I had these intense bricks that were on my own life. And I'm like, man, this is so heavy, it's weighing down. But you know when you ask people to come alongside you, they can start picking off those bricks. They go give you scripture. They will give you encouragement. They will lift you up. I even think of a scripture that it's like, like when Moses was like really tired and weary had two people, I can't remember their names like, but lifting him up and lifted Aaron and her. That's, I thought that's what their names are. Thank you for that. So Aaron and her just lifting him up. And that's in this season. I just feel that we are called to just sometimes if you're like a Moses, just let the errands and hers in your life lift you up. Let them carry you because sometimes life can feel so heavy and so burdensome, but something I have just learned. And I just really sense this is where God is going with the show today is allow people to come alongside of you. God, sometimes he answers prayer by sending the people. I think sometimes we want the supernatural miracle. Oh, hallelujah, Lord, touch me, release me. But sometimes he will send the people to help you to set you free because that's what we're called to do. We're called to live in community. Even I think of Matt, look at God, the three, like the Trinity, they are by themselves. You got God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, it's family, it's community. They do things together. So we should do things together as well. You know, it's powerful about the story of Aaron and her. It said that when they lifted his arms, they were winning the battle. That's when the victory came, you know? And so when we're doing life alone, I mean, gosh, you wonder why a lot of these attacks happen. You wonder why maybe you fall into like anxiety or depression, you feel defeated, right? Well, there's a reason why God places these people because when his arms were lifted up, dates altogether, that's when the battle was being won. You're not in this battle alone. You're not in your fight alone. There's people that God has placed in you around you, they're there to hold your arms up. Know that when you allow them in your life, that's when your battle is won. That's when you have true victory in your lives at all times. And I just feel that like just to take a moment to pray if you're like, thank you for so much for sticking with us and we hope this is encouraging you. And I just really sense this like Father God in the name of Jesus, I just pray for that person that's dealing with suicide. I pray for that person that's dealing with depression. I pray for that person that's watching right now that is dealing with loneliness. And I even see you now that you're on the couch and you're weeping and you're crying. Holy spirit, we pray that this would be a sign that they are not alone. That we are their family, that we are right here with you. And Lord God, we just pray that you would touch that person's heart Lord God and that you would give them the courage to reach out Father God, no matter how embarrassing the situation is God, there's no shame in you. There's no condemnation in Christ. So Father God, we just pray today that you would touch the hearts, touch the lives of the viewers watching Lord God and let them know that you've called us to be family. That's what your whole heart has been through the beginning even as you created the earth and even when you sent your son Yeshua Jesus is for all of us to be in family. And we just pray that over our lovely viewers today. We are so grateful that you have joined us today and Matt, final thoughts, final words. Yeah, you know, I wanna give like a little perspective switch here. Maybe you're on the other side of the fence and you kind of don't really need the help or you're in a good place but maybe somebody needs yours. So could you just ask the Holy Spirit, man, just to unveil unto you, give you eyes to see the words to say, reach out to somebody today. It could be through social media. Who knows, just simply how could I pray for you? How are you doing? You never know, a text could really go a long way with somebody because you might be the one that has been placed in somebody's life for such a time as this. God has given you wisdom. God has given you the know-how and the courage. Greater's he who's in you than he who's in the world. I know sometimes we don't know what to say but the Holy Spirit will give you the right words to say at the right time. God bless you guys. Thank you so much for joining us.