 Self-improvement seems like a simple concept and what I've been learning the more I look into it is that No, it's not I had a ton of people recommend that I check out the new Jaden animations video Where she's talking about self-improvement and there's a lot a lot of great tips in there about how you can improve yourself as well What is up everybody, this is Chris from the rewired soul where we talk about the problem Focus on the solution and if you're new to my channel my channel is all about mental health And what I like to do is pull different things going on in the YouTube community to try to teach you how to improve your mental and emotional Well-being so if you're into that kind of stuff make sure you subscribe and ring that notification bell All right, but anyways before I jump into this video about Jaden animations I'm gonna kind of break it down and use some different clips and kind of analyze and unpack some things to give you Guys some advice but before I do that real quick So there's some things just going on in my life and those of you who don't know me yet I used to have a lot of anger issues and that old Chris is still in there And it's something that I'm actively working on and you know, I it's crazy the the change I've had but anyways Because this is something I'm dealing with like recently in my life. I'm going to write a short e-book About anger management. I just put a poll up over on the community page a lot of you a lot of you said yes I need this so do me a favor down in the comments below Just let me know like what what are different aspects of anger that you need to work on like is it with family with with Friends with work with whatever it is with your relationship Like what is this thing that you need to work on just to kind of give me ideas of topics that I need to write about in this Little e-book. All right, so yeah, like I said Jaden animations just made a new video and a lot of it's about self-improvement And there's a few different things that we can unpack from this But there's some very useful tips that she gives and I also want to give you some tips like some things that help me out of my Life and some things I recommend to other people self-improvement is extremely important to me out of all the personal values I stand by it's the one I actively think about the most multiple times today I'll end up having some sort of check up with myself to analyze if I'm doing enough to satisfy my self growth quota So right there she's talking about constantly trying to improve oneself and later on We're gonna talk about like good ways and bad ways of doing that. But yes, this should be your number one goal Okay, every single day I wake up with one goal one goal in mind every day I just want to be a little bit better than I was yesterday just a little bit better not much just a little look how small look Look at that right there. Just a little bit better than what I was yesterday Okay, and that could take on any meaning that you know that works for you, right? Like do I want to be a better youtuber today a better boyfriend a better father a better writer like what am I doing? Right, so if I do that I have some kind of intention for the day to improve on one aspect of my life Now the best thing that I I can do for myself and what I suggest you do is at the end of the day Right at the end of the day ask yourself one simple question one simple question at the end of the day, okay? Did I move closer to becoming the person I want to be or did I move further away? So going back to like the anger management thing I was talking about with this book like if you blew up on somebody today Did that move you closer to your ideal self or further away? Ask yourself about that evaluate it and see what you can work on the next day Just a bad case of imposter syndrome pretty much. I'd explain what that is But I don't think I'm qualified enough to do that There are much better youtubers than me who are much more deserving of my position And I don't think I'm worthy of people paying attention to what I say because my content isn't good enough and oh, oh Boy I was thinking about doing an entire I was just thinking about doing the entire video on imposter syndrome I've had so many of you asked me about imposter syndrome, but let's talk about it real quick So Jaden animations, right? I just checked her channel out I just now subscribed to because she's been doing some cool topics lately. She's almost five million subscribers almost five million subscribers, right? But this imposter syndrome is this negative self-talk that we get that, you know, we're undeserving of this We're not the right person and this is something that I struggle with all the time all the time my youtube channel is taken It's nowhere near where Jaden animations is but my youtube channel is taking off and the community We have is amazing like the discord server and the Facebook group and there's so many comments that I get and people are just like Chris, you know, thank you so much or Chris you motivated me to go to therapy or Chris you did that or whatever I'm like no no like I'm nothing like I'm you know six years ago Like I was a I was a drug addict who nobody should take any advice from right and there's a part of me that still sits in There and thinks that now there's things that I've worked on throughout my life Like I know a lot of that stems from like childhood some emotionally abusive relationships that I was in I know where the source of that is so imposter syndrome is something that a lot of us a lot of us struggle with and the best advice I can give you is doing what I always try to teach you to do is separate the truth from the false Okay, separate what what your brain is telling you is real and some of the lies that your brain tells you, okay? Something that a lot of us struggle with is not remembering on a regular basis that not every thought that comes in our head is a true thought We don't have to believe everything that comes in our head right like, you know, I'm not that great I'm not this so the way I analyze is it true or false like I look at the evidence I look at the evidence and I providing like is the information I'm providing to people just in the context of YouTube is the Information I'm providing to people of value to them in some way shape or form Right, did they do something that's bettering their life like if that if that actually worked then I need to look at that And just really like let that soak in and say okay, Chris You're not you know a piece of crap Chris. You aren't terrible at what you're doing, right? You know the other thing I get a lot a lot I have a really good idea funny idea for a video about this But a lot of people ask me my credentials all the time and I reply a lot, right? Like there was something I posted on my Instagram the other day by the way follow me on Instagram But someone said like something along the lines. I'll put it right here But they said like oh this guy thinks just because he has some credentials that we need to listen to him about mental health And I'm like jokes on you like I don't I don't have a degree or something like that, right? You'll see it right here, but anyways like that. That's true. That's true Like there's people like Katie Morton out there on YouTube who is a licensed therapist. I'm not you know I'm currently in school a lot of what I've learned is through just my own research my own lived experience I read a lot of books about this stuff like that's what it is But that is something that I get self-conscious about and when people bring that up it like gives even more like weight to that So something I look at is like well the advice is still helping them my experience is still helping them Chris You worked in a mental health treatment facility Chris you worked with thousands of clients Chris a lot of people thank you You know what I mean? So we got to balance out those voices in our head and look at the evidence a big trip up can also be Comparing yourself to other people. There's definitely positive aspects of being inspired by people you look up to but like most things too much of Anything can be bad. This is great And what I want you to take from this is look at the difference between comparing yourselves to others and getting inspired by others So in the context of me being a youtuber, right? I can constantly compare myself I made that video about spill the other day and jealousy and all of that like one thing I have to remember is that we're all running our own race, right? But I need to use other people as inspiration of where I could be and where I can get and this is something that I use with life as well I used to be such a hater. I hated people who were more successful than me and all that I hated people who were happier than me I hated people who were handling their depression or their anxiety better than me But now what I do is I look at those people for inspiration of what I can become, right? So now I look at these large youtubers or people who are doing better than me. I'm like, oh, I can do that too, right? It's that it's that same right anything they can do I can do too, right? But I think they say anything they can do I can do better You don't got to do it better, but you can do the same thing too So that's one of the reasons why I love our discord and the Facebook group like I'm a huge believer that you should share your Experience because if you share about what you've been through it'll inspire others But when it comes to comparing ourselves to others like comparing Isn't always good if you turn it into something negative like what I see a lot of people do is we compare ourselves today To where somebody else is today and the only thing that we should compare is where we are today to where we were yesterday That's why I was talking about set your one goal for the day to be a little bit better than you were yesterday Like the only person you should be comparing yourself to is the past version of yourself if you're growing every single day little by little You're constantly improving. You've also got to think about why you want to improve something Is it for yourself or because you think that's what other people want from you If you make choices based on what others want then oops you played yourself. I love this one I love this one so much. This is something I talked to you guys all about about all the time check your motives Check your motives check your motives check your motives. Why are you trying to improve? Why are you trying to do this? Why why why because so much of our depression is based around twisted value systems? I can't tell you that's enough like why do you want to get good at sports? Is it so you is it because you like playing sports? Is it because you want to get in shape or are you doing it so you can impress the guys? Are you doing it so you can impress the girls you see what I'm meaning? Why do you want to get a raise and a promotion at your job? Do you want to do it because you love the company you love what you're doing? You love your career or are you doing it for status, right? Are you doing it so you could buy more things so you can impress people you see what I mean? Like always ask yourself. Why do you want to improve? This is something that I'm asking myself all the time like it's YouTube I get a ton of crappy comments like oh my god. You're just doing this to get views You're just doing this to get subscribers and first off you're damn right who on YouTube doesn't want views and subscribers But what are my motives behind it? The only reason the only reason I want to someday get to a place where I have millions and millions of subscribers Because my motive behind it is because I want to help as many people as possible All right, so when I check in it's like am I doing it for the money? Am I doing it for you know, you know, so people know who I am like why am I doing it? And when I check in with myself I'm constantly just reminded that I just want to help people right and if I start to steer off that track I got Tristan sitting right over there on that couch and she reminds me and I get right back on the right track Until one year in high school I suddenly had an identity crisis and a whole mental breakdown being like I don't know who I am anymore All my personality traits are based on things I've modified for other people. My favorite color isn't even blue We ended up painting my bedroom walls from blue to white because of that meltdown this This is interesting and something that Jaden brought up now This is something a lot of people struggle with but I know I have a lot of Viewers out there who struggle with borderline personality disorder. So one of the symptoms of BPD By the way, I'm not diagnosing you a BPD if you can relate to Jaden just want to make that clear But one of the symptoms is lacking a sense of self and something I talked about in my story of you know Experiencing some of those symptoms was I never knew who I was and I was always trying to fit in and I will recall it a social Chameleon right so Jaden talks about how much you told a friend like oh my favorite color is blue too Just so she could be accepted and you might be somebody or you might know somebody who does this like do you know anybody? Or are you this person where whenever they date somebody they like kind of turn into that person like I start liking the same music They start liking the same TV shows and all these things and you're like looking at them like wait You don't really like those things right but what happens is and there's something I did for a very long time too I lost my sense of self and when I got sober six years ago It was a scary thing like who am I if I'm not like you or if I'm not with this person Or if I'm not doing this hobby if I'm not doing this thing who am I because we tie our identity So closely in with these things that we like or whatever it is right and this is why this is why we need to Do our own self-discovery I had some people asking me I think in discord the other day and saying Chris How do you discover who you are just try stuff do stuff go out and do stuff go get a coloring book Try coloring did you like it you did it okay? You're not somebody who likes coloring You know what I mean like just try different things Discover yourself that is one of the funnest things you could do in your life is discover the things you like or don't like like I cannot explain to you just How amazing it was you know it was scary at first not knowing who I was and what I liked But learning that about myself at 27 years old like six years ago when I was 27 years old like it was just such a great Experience I loved learning who I was and what I actually liked or didn't like and you know what the last thing on that Little rant like for those of you going through a breakup right now I know breakups suck grieve You know go through your emotions do what you got to do, baby But now is the time to discover who you are what you like because maybe maybe that person in your life was holding you back You know what I mean discover who you are. There's a lot that goes into self-improvement It's a whole balancing act of understanding what you want and not taking things personally and staying humble and not getting hit by Meteors, but believe it or not with a lot of time and figuring yourself out. It's very manageable That's the last clip I want to show and it's so important It's so important because this is something that we try to look at all the time right like confidence but humility and Self-awareness like all these things it's balanced one of the best things that I ever learned somebody told me this they said You know improving your mental health It's all about balance. It's all about balance so many things seem contradictory So we're constantly trying to find balance It sounds like a lot of work, but we are constantly like kind of self-reflecting like I told you at the end of each day Did you move closer to being the person you want to be or further away like look at that balancing act, right? Like for example, I stick up for myself, but was I a jerk about it? You see what I mean? So how so the question I have to ask myself is how can I stick up for myself while still being Kind, compassionate, empathetic, forgiving. Does that make sense? So all of this is about balance So how do you build up your own self-esteem? Your self-confidence? How do you build those things up without becoming some cocky person that nobody wants to hang out with? You see what I mean? So balance balance balance ask yourself Where is the balance in this right if you look at this thing like on a scale right plus 10 to negative 10 Are you are you further this way? Are you further that way? We call this in the mental health community and in the mindfulness meditation community. We call this equanimity Okay, it's finding a balance with your own emotions. All right, so constantly look for this balance Anyways, I'm very glad that so many of you recommended this video to me Jaden animations did one on anxiety. I just saw a couple months ago So like I said, I just subscribed to her but all of you all of you out there like if there are youtubers out They're talking mental health or you want me to kind of analyze it and give you some tips based on what they said Like if you think something that they said can work for you But you just need a little bit more information like hit me up DM me or tweet at me or leave comments email me do whatever you got to do because I love just Branching out and finding more stuff in the YouTube community that you're already watching to teach you how to improve your mental health All right. Anyways, that's all I got for you with this video if you liked this video Please give it a thumbs up if you're new make sure you subscribe and ring that notification bell because I make a ton of videos And a huge thank you to everybody supporting the channel over on patreon You are all amazing if you would like to sign up click a top right there There's some new patreon exclusive videos up there and again Please leave comments down below and let me know what you would like to have worked on in an anger management e-book All right. Thanks again for watching. I'll see you next