 Spontaneous live, and I'm so honored today. I have a guest Manuela She's over there right now in Switzerland kind of you were saying yesterday kind of somewhat near the border of Germany and Austria in the the German speaking part of Switzerland thank you so much for coming together on this spontaneous live and For us just being able to just share the joy and the happiness that we feel Thank you so much David for that possibility to be here and Yeah to share the like Tanya I listened to the Tanya's Podcast yesterday, and it was about the pilgrim and I could take out a lot for myself for that Also the pilgrim outside and at the same time. It's the pilgrim in myself to meet myself Yeah, and I live in the little Swiss Hills, so In a little village But to come out of my own mind I needed I need really or needed also a lot of help from Jesus and the Holy Spirit to Yeah to go over my fears to show and to Connect and to Integrate yeah, and someone said to me years ago. That's all yourself. I was a node. That's not possible This one is not me. This one is not me. I'm not like that and then I really saw in that mind training of a course in miracles that It's really needed to integrate that it's the way out of my depression in the world. Yeah Yeah, and it was not always that easy because I Don't like I did not like to go out really. I was I was a remit completely for myself with my children Yeah, and in that meetings I Really felt connection. I really felt like oh, there are people they Look for the same They look for freedom. They look for peace. They want to change their minds and that motivated me to open up more and more Then in 2017, I think one night I had this opening I don't know where that was coming from because I was no writer before I did not write poetry before I had an opening at night and That night so many birds were coming in my mind and through me I started to write on papers. I put it under my bed every night hours writing Almost no sleep But the words I thought where are they coming from and it was always about the darkness goes to light heaviness goes easy Sadness goes happy and it was about to find my big love I had a broken heart about my big love years ago Yeah, and I had to meet that idea of my big love this true Badu the messenger of God who sees everywhere Yeah, my big love was a pro projection of that I saw him like that and his name was really David And In that I found myself it's myself what I would I projected outside? I'm that happiness. I'm that sweetness. I'm that messenger of God And and I started to publish that on my Facebook account my words and In writing I had a lot of transformation in my mind the heaviness the darkness Was really started to be more soft and soft and I cannot say I did not cry a lot. I cried for years Me too Yeah, me too, I think that's part of going through the darkness to the light and it's I mean we're not really We don't know what to expect, but I love that you just around 2017 just started to have all these words come to you because a lot of times people Think well, how am I gonna do this and what am I gonna do and what's gonna happen in the future? but I think like you it starts to get activated something gets activated in our heart and then It just shows up in our life. We we are must be willing for it We must be willing to allow it and then it's so beautiful. It comes through Words poetry art, you know, you're you're just an expression That of this love inside that wants to come through and it's very much like flowers you know, a lot of flowers have a beautiful Perfume a beautiful fragrance and they just that's all they do all day long as they give it away to the wind and Don't expect anything in return Just as the joy is in the giving the fragrance and no concern where the wind takes the fragrance You know, it can blow it anywhere But they're just into the giving and I sometimes look at trees that way too How how they can be so majestic and and they're they offer their shade and and they're so still they're so planted in one spot and so content The rest and and to just be and extend every day So I think I know you and I both like traveling and nature we like being out in nature I see I enjoy a lot of your photographs too. I'm just being down by the water or out by the flowers and I used to even have an Instagram account where I posted a lot of course the miracles words and then Both of my accounts got hacked and just disappeared. So I'm just having so much fun just putting up pretty pictures and some photos I take and some different things now because well Okay, that's gone that those words aren't needed now a picture is worth a thousand words So let's have some fun on Instagram with that. So But maybe you can just share how the the poetry started back in 2017 and the words and then it's in terms of artistic expression How has it been over the years for you in terms of like drawing or extending with art? Yes, it was Through the port in 2017 and 18. I went through a lot of darkness I transformed as and then had an a mind collapse in 2018 as I saw in a in a moment of Completely destroying and giving up what I all did through all lifetimes and so ordered It looks like all the lifetimes to hundreds of years and I died I died I died in many lifetimes in three days and was completely freaking out and in that moment I just had music music is also something that helps me. I cannot play really good music I play some little children songs of the guitar But I listened to music. I used Harry Krishna the most and in that three days of really craziness in my mind And when I listened to Harry Krishna, it started to be quiet. So I knew oh God is now coming That was just a symbol and in that moment I could recover a little bit and that the next load of darkness was coming and After that, how do I come out of that? I use poetry and following the voice in my mind It was not a different voice. It was my voice, but the voice was so loud and so clear I thought I thought everybody can hear that But I followed that instructions and after three days everything was over and after 10 days Everything was at the same place again. So I was completely okay with me after 10 days But since there I was discovering since 2018 what was happening with me there Because I was not anymore the same person like before Nothing in my life did work anymore like before I could not do it I had this clear guidance And then I wrote it more and more and I started to express love in photographs. I've made photos of natures But I had a little bit troubles to be with humans So I used the flowers as my friend and I was walking into the forest and I talked with him and the tree I transformed that fear and then I could see Oh people are also flowers. I in some people I could see it more easy Yeah, and then I discovered also not all flowers look perfectly somewhere like that and it had to be perfect And with that I started to work Make out of the old stuff something new something golden something easy so like alchemy And this I expressed also in art stuff like maybe more in like with cooking is also art for me A good meal who is colorful. You are so happy. Yeah. Yeah And it everything started to have a new value And I really also started to cook very intensive and to look what is really good food and what do I like and Make people happy makes me happy yeah And so to take care to learn to take care of me and to take care of others like the flowers that they all can grow but first is I have to take care of me when I can grow everybody can grow with me around me You can grow together And that was for me also an act of art to see out of the darkness the new thing in my mind And I learned through that collapse because I could not go back anymore Yeah Yeah, that's so important. I think a friend of mine from granada who's over here where I am in In utah. He came all the way across the ocean and he brought me some gifts John kehoe and he brought me john of the cross A big thick book of st. John of the cross And he said these are some of the great Mystics that have contributed to the great awakening And sounds like in one sense that that three day collapse sounds like very much like st John of the cross and his dark night of the soul because um, I think people sometimes can be afraid of that but But I always tell people well, it's it's really the ego's interpretation of Of a reinterpretation of the whole world So it's not like it's not like that you are dying, but it's like ego is It's starting to fall away and it is screaming and kicking Because it's it's saying no, no, that's not the the world the pathetic world I had for you You know you you have to hold on to that and something inside of us is just that voice is is our true voice is saying no no This will pass But I think it's so helpful that you're sharing this because I went through these things too extreme darkness It feels like everything's dying feels like you're you're you're dying, but the whole world is dying with you somehow Uh, so it's very dark with a lot of grief and sadness and tears And I had tears for many years, but there's these really super intense periods where Where all of a sudden that's just part of the awakening. That's just where you say, okay I'm not gonna hide anything. I'm gonna allow every emotion up and they all come up Sometimes it seems like all at once or over three days And now it's like you're reborn like you're you're born anew And you're sparkling and you're shining and you're sharing And you just are happy and you want to make happy Jesus says in the course to heal is to make happy It sounds like you just want to have happiness with the people around you whether you're playing your guitar with children's songs whether you're cooking baking Photograph whatever, you know, it's all just for happiness. It's really that simple Yeah, it's a and you can use it I can see I can use it everywhere where I am when I go shopping when I go wherever whatever I do for a walk It's really expressing the love is not just a moment. Oh, I do it now and then I go back to my other life It's no you don't want something others anymore and for that I'm so grateful that I could see that in that moment because that what I am what I thought it's died Now or 700 years ago whenever it's still here. It's just it's my thinking that change that collapses and Sure, that makes comes a lot of fear up But I'm grateful because I remember when I made the decision Jesus. I want to have everything I want to look at everything I want to see everything what I've done and I want to be I have to take the responsibility for all of these things to share the happiness and and now I really the inspiration through poetry and pictures to make photographs and To look at that completely new to give it to me and to my whole world And to spread out that how easy it is and everybody can do that and It's like also when you look at everything and your mind change. It's like art less art Yeah, yeah Artless art and it's so I think it's kind of it seems like just involuntary like A friend another friend from from over there in Germany, Bakhti She one time told me that she said I always told myself I just will write a few things, but I will not share it on facebook and then Suddenly one day she found herself Sharing it on facebook And I think it's beautiful how you share your words and your art as well on facebook because Here it's a social media platform that was meant for connecting and sharing, you know, ultimately And it's so natural. It's it's not really complicated. You just start Sharing it because it's your gift to yourself and to the whole universe and then other people start liking or or saying thank you and expressing gratitude Because it starts to light up their world, you know through facebook their world starts lighting up just from you Being happy and sharing your happiness. So I think it's It's a wonderful thing that that we can just share freely, you know, it's it's not a commercial venture We're not doing it for any reason of the world. It's just For the joy of it and sometimes people have said, you know, well If we're all one mind and there's nobody out there to save or anything Why would you travel david? Why would you travel around around the world or go to all these 40 some countries? And I said, well, I wasn't doing it for any worldly reason It's just I enjoyed it I enjoyed traveling. I enjoyed meeting people. I enjoyed they'd say come to my house and I'd say great We would share a meal we would go out one time. I was with a friend I and We were out just walking around and in the city and and then we both We're heading back to the hustle where we were staying and and I said, is there anything you want and he said I I would like a good beer And I said, okay, and and he said what do you want and I said, I would like to sit and soak in a in a hot tub And then we walked about 10 feet and we looked right next to our hospital We hadn't seen it was a place where you could sit in the tub And and have a keg of a beer And we just burst into laughter Richard. He's he's actually here The monastery with me now and and so we got in there we we had Bear in the hot tub and then we got out put on these long white robes and we just had so much fun But it was nothing We were looking for in the world We were just sharing our thoughts and then the whole thing just showed up Right there. So that's that's kind of fun how it works that way where you don't Have to think of it as something you want to do in the future You just kind of opened your heart to what is my joy right now? Yes, so it's Well, that helps it's not my future plans anymore. I'm happy now and everything Extends then and is still there and I also can see sometimes when I have to thought oh I have that not and then I hear no look you have it already. Oh, right. It's here It looks just differently in in another form and we were traveling in it's now in the summer holidays through belgian and Holland netherland And we met some people there and we had a spontaneous meeting at the beach in den haag And there were people showing up. It was so spontaneous But they want also to surprise us that they are here We make just in the telegram group We are here in den haag at the beach and there were so many people showing up and we had just a nice meeting Together and shared that and had a lot of joy and there were connections there and openings there and we Just knew each other online But to meet physical there it was really differently And this was was really an open up as I had a great experience there at this It was also very fresh there windy and I was so happy that it was not so hot And everything was just like it plays For us it plays for me. It's for me and it's all for the good. There's nothing against us It's always how we look at it. There's everything for you for me And when I see that then I start to see happiness everywhere like I shared pictures I said I made some pictures they looked from the From the water and the leaves and it was great. It was not such a good quality And then my brother sent me An app to work with photographs and I tried that and I had such a bright colorful life with two clicks I thought wow that was very easy and this is how it's in my mind when I start to forgive It's a really great example. Oh, I think it's dead and then I forgive and it Blooms up so colorful and sparkling. Yeah, yeah That's funny that you mentioned that too because I had an app on my phone that I hadn't used much But it was for converting photographs in amazing ways And I was I got a reminder. Oh your app is about to expire so I I said here's fabba look at this app and everything and she was like, oh, this is amazing With with one click with two clicks these photos that I'm taking Take on all kinds of different nuances and qualities. So she ended up she got the app for her phone So it's more just fun artistic expression Where something has a little bit different Change which just gives it a different feel That you may feel in your heart that you want to share and then you do and then People like it. I mean, I end up taking a photograph just not even thinking about it And then I stick it up on facebook or instagram and then people Are responding and reacting to that But it was an afterthought. I mean, it wasn't like I was consciously even thinking I just it's it's it can Voluntary, you know, it just comes through us Without us having to put a conscious effort into anything And I really feel like true happiness does not involve effort When we were going through the darkness, it seemed to be yeah, of course, we were efforting Then we were hoping and praying Carry me through oh great spirit But then once you kind of break through Get through the clouds and you get into the sunshine the light then it's it's very effortless. It's very easy Yes, just to follow that guidance is now Much more easy because it's I could see it and I follow it's also the trust that grows I trust that voice in me I trust Jesus that he guides me through everything and he guides me always to the right place So I'm always at the right place and then I ask just oh What do I have to do here and I will receive an answer Maybe it's just sitting there and do nothing and that's everything What I have to do and give peace to everything and spread out the peace also in quietness sometimes and That communicates too and I have some I have a daughter She's 12 years old and she she says sometimes they were sitting with me and said oh when I look at you mama I'm so happy. My heart starts to be happy. I can feel that And that's that's I know it communicates. I it reached her and She has now also with 12 years her first art exhibition. It's that Her first and That's so nice that she expressed her love in a different way of art and in her young age And I can see how she booms up in that and yeah, and more and more Brothers also from course in miracles come to me. They make art and They want to spread out their art and we can share that and that's also something that I have in my mind We never know where that goes But I have some thoughts sometimes to make something together with some artists and express that love in art, maybe together in a vernisage or Something like that A lot of artists around also here in Europe. We have a lot of artist brothers. Yes. I need more more Yeah, yeah What's so beautiful? I mean when I Just feel the essence that you are it's it reminds me of a very short Teaching in a course in miracles and that is to teach is to demonstrate a lot of times I think people get caught up in words and theology and even metaphysics and And forget that it's our attitude That is teaching all the time And and if you truly are happy to me, that is the highest teaching because When you teach with words those are just Uh opportunities to open up and just like the words come through you with poetry That's the same thing no different than somebody who's speaking in a at a lecture or a classroom or something like that But I think that's what I really like about Doing these lives. I just kind of pray and I feel okay Who who do I feel that's that's really demonstrating a course in miracles? I'm not talking about fancy words and lots of books and Seminars and workshops when I mean just living In the present moment that is to me the highest teaching And then yesterday tanya came to mind because she sent me that Voice mail and she was so happy. She was just bursting in happiness and I just thought I think I need to start these lives and then you came to mind too even during my talk with her I was thinking of you. I was thinking about the I'm thinking of the demonstrations Because oftentimes I see that when you do that and you share your poetry and your photos and so forth Then it's just a permission for others who are doing the same thing To say oh, it's good. It's this is valid. This is Accepted this is something I can I can do too. So you're just showing Other will say course of miracles teachers That you can just simply be happy Be content let the spirit express through you and that it's very simple. This is not a complex thing Sometimes people like to make spirituality very complex And then somehow they get into like arguing and debating And I remember that one of the first two students have a course of miracles was Dr. Bill Fedford and he's the one who famously said if If two people get into an argument about a passage from a course of miracles It's better that they tear the page out Then argue with one another. This is one of the first two students in the world And he had such a presence to say it's better to tear the page out than to argue with the brother Because I think he was one of them that really got the joy. He he was so happy I I talked to Judy scutch witson When he had his last day On earth and he was so happy She said he came to her apartment and he was he was almost like dancing around The room the living room like fredder stair or something. He was he couldn't contain his happiness and then the next morning he He said i'm gonna take a walk in the sunshine and right in her front yard. He just dropped the body down It was a massive heart attack But I say his heart just burst in joy Because he was so happy and he was gone before he even hit the ground the neighbor was a Was a heart doctor and he basically said oh he he died before he He even could hit the ground. It was so quick So to me that's what our life is meant to be happy joyful And then when the time comes we lay aside this little garment of flesh because It's no longer needed the happiness Transcended the form even then that's a beautiful way to just think instead of dying Just think of laying something aside that has served well And you don't need it needed service anymore. It's a very soft way of looking at at the world Yes, yes, that's true. That's That's also what I What I often hear yeah the teaching does not stop or the learning teaching and learning does not stop after a session Or a workshop or now I'm in an event with someone or I visit an event or I give one And then after that I go to my hole. Yeah, then it's dark again So I need the next event that that cannot be the truth It it must be available all the time god is there all the time because one lesson says also God is with me and I'm with god So it cannot be that it's just in an event or in a session My session never ends so when I do everything with joy And this is what I always try to remember and then I forget it I want to remember me because I don't want to go in my old prison bag. It's not possible It's not needed And to go always back to that and every single moment. It's my session It's my demonstration of love and that can be really so simple and I remember also like some critics when I wrote started to wrote poetry I hear those vanilla romantic. That's romantic. That has nothing to do with a course in miracles You're looking at love and life. No, I transform myself And all that critique it was like for me also to go over that my Doubts my own bounce has that poetry a value or the idea it's not common It's not um, how do we call that it's not Coursing miracles conform. It does not fit with a course in miracles. We don't do that Yeah, we all have to transform and look new at romantic and when I look out look at the tree It's completely romantic and I saw once also when you talked about the trees and the flowers I I saw once a big tree here in the village I saw and I felt in my heart The tree and I we are one. It's the same. I could feel his leaves in me I could feel how the wind goes through him. It's going through me. I could feel that living force I cannot deny that this is all me and one one mind. It's not possible anymore I cannot deny the experiences that I had in my mind and it was Not because I did Special exercises or whatever. I did the course in miracles and some other stuff before but I just knew when I started with the course This will work. This is what I what I was looking for first. It needs discipline Yes, I was an untrained mind. We all when we start with mind train discipline and discipline Well Transformed into joy What should I then do differently as just forgive and be happy? I have Nothing else in the world makes sense or would make me happy anymore. That does not work and that's I find for myself Very romantic Yeah, I think it's I think most people would say that there's a real essence to a lot of poetry because I in the united states We had a a period of time in the united states history was called the transcendentalism and and emerson and Whitman and all these amazing Poets that were touching into what you're describing. They would talk about they felt it in the trees in the leaves They they felt it all around them Henry david thorough was a Was a writer who just he came from a very simple family and they they made pencils for a living and he Even that he said I must go out and live in the woods and And live by a lake and I must find what is sublime About life and when I do I'm going to publish it to the whole world and he wrote these beautiful Things about walden pond where he went off to live in the woods And I've done that myself. I've gone off to live in the woods, but I I got so into poetry You know, of course reading, you know roomy and kabeer and then I've got oh my gosh there's all these indian poets and And you start to see poetry as a pathway to god And then there's so many great philosophers even over in europe where you live there's So many deep deep deep philosophers So one time I loved philosophy so much Because I I could feel the essence of the philosophers searching for the truth searching searching searching So I love to hear what they had to say and and even einstein and quantum physics and I got into all that and then of course The artist when I was in university I I was in the college of design art and architecture for five years So I got to go through all the books and look at all the paintings Through many ages art history And that excited me then when I got into psychology. I thought well I'm interested in the in the highest psychology. I'm interested in Transpersonal psychology, so I went and got into humanistic then transpersonal But I think when we really want to To know the truth then we start to see Ourselves in so many different ways and aspects of the world And it's not that we have to compare or contrast them because they're all Wonderful expressions over over the many years when you really look you can feel it In the in the in their hearts. I just feel the heart So to me it turns into like a big symphony like like it's a big symphony a big dance and we're all part of that dance and That's what everybody wants to you know, they really don't want to to just Do boring things or they don't want to feel depressed or sad They want to fall in love and I think that That's the essence of romantic is to fall in love That's that's what the romantic wants to fall in love and and really it's with our divine self Our true real self is where the love is so isn't that a beautiful discovery to have Yeah, that's that's the journey minute when you are sad and you try to find your big love and you discover It's in yourself. It's yourself You are that that you can never lose it again. There's nothing outside and this romantic idea brought me Really at that at that place to discover myself like the pilgrim from tanya It's the the saint or the mystic or the big love the higher love in myself And that's me. It's me and that makes me then so happy that because I go with me all the time I have to love me first because I I cannot love someone else really when I don't love myself and with poetry I started to discover during writing. I write that to myself. I wrote sometimes poetry and in the weeks after I experience exactly what I wrote That was given to me. I wrote it to myself. I thought someone who was writing that poetry a long time ago to me It's myself because I had the feeling I wrote that already. I just have to do it again And then I could see oh that happens then it happens and I had always an opening then I gave that to myself. It was and this then I this what we call in the world. We call also lucid dreams Yeah, it's every I had that at night so often and that was transformation in my mind because then I could see my mind Does not really sleep. We never really sleep It transforms and works the Christ in you never sleeps And this I could see at night Sure, there were moments When I was writing the whole night. I looked like that during the day Who does not sometimes look like that? It's fine It changes nothing Yeah, we feel grateful even when we we don't sleep and we're so awake and we have so much coming through us that The next day. Oh, well The body looks the way it looks And we sleep whenever we feel the sleep it it's more we're more intuitive, you know We just eat if we're hungry sleep when we're guided to sleep But we don't we don't have to be on all these schedules, you know, we we don't keep projecting out time As if it has to be scheduled even this this is uh, I just contacted you yesterday. We had our first Video call ever and then here we show up and I said well if we can both get into the room here in this studio I'll just push the live button That's all we did. It's that simple But it's like we're just meeting each other inform for the first time But actually it's a it's a very deep recognition of what's always been there Yeah, it's been there forever Yeah, this I can really feel in my heart also when I when I sometimes write you some things I don't have to wait for an answer or something about the heart. It communicates It communicates immediately through it with no words and I wrote you something I had immediately the answer that wow that that's really a great connection and I can feel that it helped me so much to to just to share something and then it changed I could or I dreamed once I had a dream about you That was so I was walking up the hills and I had to go really Far away from the street. There was a truck coming a very heavy truck And then he stopped on my side and he said go away more step step away more and put your black Howdy over your head And I thought why I have to hide me Yeah, because the heaviness goes now through you don't have to be in the way step away And then then in that dream he said look on facebook. I'm a friend from david Then I trusted him and I covered me and Heaviness was going away And I then really that used a symbol and I could see the heaviness when I step aside from the world and my Old thought system it really goes there and it does not really does not even touch me And you are a friend of a truck driver. Thank you Yeah, you know, it's funny A couple days ago a man wrote to me and and I had met him Many years ago and then somebody told me that he He was Sent to prison And and I didn't hear from him. So He wrote me a couple days ago. He said he's Still in prison. He's about to get out But he he was put in prison for something he didn't do But he said I figured well this this is supposed to happen to me and I'm supposed to Really start to live In my heart what this is all about So I'm going to use my time in prison and he said he wrote me from a black market tablet That he got I just got the message from him I love you when I get out. I'm coming To be with you and to live with you And then he shared all of his love and gratitude and at the end He said and if you won't receive me then I think I'll just go to Nepal and And live on a mountain So I I wrote back a very loving message, you know, and he got it on his little Whatever it was black market tablet, you know, whatever it works I have heard some funny stories too. I was doing broadcast a couple years ago And this man wrote to me and he said I'm in I'm in a prison in Argentina And I was able to get just enough signal To get your zoom broadcast only on audio We didn't have enough internet, but he said I'm here listening in prison in a corner in an argentina prison listening to the audio of Of the things that you're teaching and I don't know how he was able to send a message to me, but I love getting those Messages that are saying like I'm listening. I'm I'm connected Even though my body seems to be in a prison somewhere or whatever my mind is free my heart is free And he said he was passing out somehow He got a hold of a book that I wrote this moment is your miracle He was passing that out to some of the the people in prison. I think and it was he said it's helping them You know get feel their connection to to the god to source So it's it's beautiful. I have another friend who's been in prison for many years over 20 years and he started Reading some things in there and then he started a prison ministry inside the prison and then he started sharing movies And he got to be so happy that finally they they went let's move him to another prison All right, and so he's now he's it's starting again in another prison Because he's got it in his heart, you know, he he doesn't need the environment To to do to share his joy. He just needs to keep sharing it. So it's very sweet So that's really lovely to reach the prison and then they are all free They started to get pretty happy inside the prison It's the happiest prison then maybe we can we can once watch a documentary on netflix the happy prison Yeah, happy prison the prisoners who decided to be happy Oh my Well, this has been so delightful I'm so glad that we got to come on and just share this and uh I'm looking around the other it looks like there's about 83 people that are watching us now He started with zero And then just it's just it naturally Organically sprung up to 83 just from people that probably felt something Nudge them in their heart like tune in now because I that's what I like about these. I'm not announcing them I'm not I'm not announcing that they're happening Because I don't even know when they're gonna happen until they happen And so it's perfect that we're both on here because we're both trying to live a very intuitive happy joyful life and just uh, not plan The future just let the future be shown to us Yes, that's right. It's all like yesterday when you when you called me. It was already The 11 o'clock at night here in switzerland. I said, oh, no, that's then a pyjama talk for me 11 o'clock. Yeah, I think we're eight hours difference. Yes Yeah, it's eight hours, but it was so great and normally at that time I don't look at my phone anymore, but there I it was really like it has to be like that. Oh, that's that's really great That's fantastic and beautiful Thank you. Thank you Thank you, man. Well, thank you from the bottom of my heart. The what a what a joyful time Thank you so much. David. I love you. Love you too. Thank you. Okay Bye to everybody. Thanks for