 Hi, I'm Coach Corey Wayne and this is my video coaching newsletter and the topic of today's newsletter is going to be I married the woman from hell. I've got a special guest today Mr. Anthony dream Johnson also known as the president of the manosphere. Yes, sir. Thanks for coming by. Yeah, man So you probably heard me say this before is that no matter how bad you think you got it in life There's always somebody that's got it worse. If you remember the video I did just in the past week It was a guy that had been dating this girl for I think they were together about three years and he found out after he'd had a kid with her Had kind of mingled their family. You know, she had a child from a previous relationship He had two kids from another relationship So they kind of merged their families together if you will and then basically he found out that She was a sugar baby and been selling nude pictures of herself since she was 17. She's now 25 And I guess had several men that were giving her money some of them. She was sleeping with and Obviously as you can imagine the dude was pretty devastated and he's been following my work for quite a few years And so I kind of went through in the video and critiqued some of the things where along the way There were red flags and he just kind of Because he really liked her and she was hot. He sent pictures beautiful girl and You know the first time the average guy dates what he considers a unicorn or a smoke show He thinks I'm fucking hit the lottery And it's like we make all our decisions based on our emotions and we use logic and reason to justify our purchase and he just kind of Because again, she was hot best-looking thing he'd ever been with He he gave her a lot of credit that she hadn't earned so with that said Mr. President here has got a you thought that story was crazy Wait till you hear what he's he's got to say so So like you mentioned, there's always someone out there. He's had it worse What's interesting about my story is that you know, I had this Leadership position the man is here for a long time before I met my ex-wife and obviously since then now, you know the president saying stuff So the fact that this happened to me If just looking at an observational basis That was kind of fascinating itself that this would happen to someone like me in the middle of a lot of speakers like you Similar to you anyway that have a lot of good messages from men that are legitimately controversial and strong and positive So at a base level for this to happen to someone like me was you know a big surprise to a lot of people a lot of fans We when I gave the speech a lot of fans were initially confused because they weren't even they didn't even know She wasn't at the conference. They thought she was interviewing somebody or something like that because that's what she used to do for us for a couple years So this is a man-sphere community kind of thing was fascinating for it to happen. You're supposed to be immune. Yeah Yeah, that's right. Yeah, I was surrounded by guys who are legitimately a lot of these speakers are not just Coaches and you know things like that and other you know speakers to doctors and you know FBI agents Navy SEAL is a lot of cool people But a lot of these guys are also just absolute slayers of women A lot of speakers have notch counts that are like two to three four hundred and stuff like that So they have whether you prove that or not morally you these guys have real experience of women That is like not normal You know the average guy in America has a notch kind of like seven or something like that over a lifetime according to CDC Anyway to kind of get get back to the experience itself in the story of marrying the woman from hell I gave a speech on this this experience and it's gone viral It's got about 400,000 views going in on half a million soon and it's called marrying Medusa how to survive a female psychopath So the title alone is super you know triggering and the story is interesting And there's a good hook at the beginning and your fans can actually go watch this on YouTube They can go type marrying Medusa and it should pull right up And I think one of the reasons to they don't viral Isn't just that you know I was this figure running a conference and had a YouTube channel and all that that dealt with a lot of these issues Dating and relationships and masculinity and all these things It's also like I think it's probably the most intense like you mentioned Presentation on this experience ever happening to a man that was then presented in public So without being a celebrity or something like that I'm not like Johnny Depp and Amber Heard and that kind of you know should show gone on right now But I was a young man that a lot of people could relate to and this story You know I gave the facts on what happened as best I could for two hours and like a formal You know Ted talk style presentation And it was pretty bad. I mean this stuff will get into it was fucking you know bizarre and gross and horrifying Even for a lot of guys who've been through something similar like when I got off the stage We had about you know how many dozens of guys at the conference like 60 or something like that that year It was the young men's convention. We did the under 21 convention But a lot of the guys were immediately some of them almost in tears is hearing this stuff on like an empathy level like holy fucking shit, dude Other guys could also relate to me They actually would say that you know my experience wasn't quite as bad But I can relate to you on like that point in that point and that experience and all that See it was basically it was a nightmare That's it's more complex than that though because like a lot of it was a good time I mean this chick was you know super hot had a really good time. The sex was crazy So let me back up here for a second, you know marrying Medusa had to survive a female psychopath I went in a span of ten days almost four years ago exactly it'll be February 21st Was the day that I cut things off. So a couple days from now I went from thinking that my wife was monogamous and loyal. We've been married for two years and dated for two and a half before that I Thought she was monogamous and loyal. I found out she was cheating With one guy I found this two pictures Then I found out she had been cheating with a lot of guys the whole time she I got her to admit this and Then I found out she was had been a prostitute for a long time an escort I'm not a prostitute like she wasn't like a street walker like an escort She actually called herself a high-end. I said so basically your prostitute and she goes no it was a high-end call girl I'm like so your prostitute and she would get more and more angry as I was like so you prostitute like you you have sex for money like this is very like You seem confused on this issue Anyway, it's not like that. Yeah, exactly So these days, you know, who knows what she's doing now, but these days you would see this more like sugar dating But really it was escorting is what she was doing. She did this before I met her in other relationships She did it when we were dating and I found out she had been doing it. We were married She didn't need the money. She there's nothing like you know, we now like some starving child in the street You know need to be fucking fed and I was disabled or something she was a doing this Well, in the end of the day, I think she had you know for kicks and things like that in the excitement of it and the cash I Believe firmly that she had a cluster B personality disorder Which a lot of guys who go through these toxic relationships that have this super bizarre shit that happened It's not like a regular relationship that kind of went south and it was like a bad breakup These are like really bad breakups. These are like epic, you know, but the guy you mentioned with just recently You know that you did the video on It sounds like he was dating a single mom. He got married to her. He knocked her up. Well, they didn't get married They were I think they were living together or have spending a year Maybe they weren't he didn't say but you know, they had a kid together Obviously and when he met her they she had just had a baby from some other guy Who supposedly was a horrible boyfriend a horrible human being Oh, crying over just kind of you know abandon her and She's gonna raise a kid on her own without him because she's a strong Liberated independent woman and the reality because he ended up talking I guess talking to the The I guess one of the ex-boyfriends. He's like, yeah, she's just she's doing the same shit to him Yeah, but the guy that she had the kid with Has no idea that he's the father of her child because I guess it was one of her John's that you know She was looking up but they got knocked up by so there's a dude walking around that has a son has no idea Yeah, he's got a son So a lot of these chicks that were these guys to go through these really toxic relationships They get roped up to this nightmare stuff like I didn't you know waking up I basically woke up one day to discover my wife was prostitute like this was this was shocking. This was not I don't think her family knew this this her family was very surprising to hear this I think I think they had the brother for example. I think he knew that she was kind of like super mischievous But I don't think they knew she was a hooker like this This was a big shock to her family and stuff like holy shit and to me as well all my friends and stuff But when a lot of these guys get roped into these relationships So there was mine or that guy and you know a lot of your fans will have been through experiences like this These women are not just bad women that act out. They have personality disorders They have maybe maybe they inherited it through genetics Maybe they had a really tough childhood sexual abuse things like that That led to trauma that went unresolved and then eventually dominated how they think act and behave So like my ex-wife had a wedding ring on and thought it was okay to go out and suck dick for cash And like most wives will the wedding ring on would not be this is not normal like this isn't just regular cheating This is cheating for cash. She builds a baby. I know right People thought I should have kept her and like pimped her out basically and I was like man I'm not I'm not down with that But good thinking right good, you know be a hustler But yeah, I mean this is this is disordered behavior. This is malignant behavior that destroys relationships. It destroys lives Fortunately, we didn't have any kids together and I also protected myself legally. I never got legally married to her I'm firmly opposed to any kind of legal marriage in the West today I think the government I support the position of like senator Rand Paul and congressman former congressman Ron Paul The marriage should be a private Ceremony a private religious kind of institution and the government should have very limited involvement in it Maybe for example, if you have a contract or civil union kind of thing going on That's it and the way we do marriage today with government heavily involved I think it's a bunch of nonsense and as a result men get you know screwed over in divorce court and family court every day And I didn't want to go through that As a you know is being a part of the man's fear and run in the conference I knew enough from the pickup artists in the men's red skies It was like something is really off with marriage today in the West and I'm not okay with that I don't want to get involved with that regardless of the trick You know, I thought she was of course amazing. I thought she was this unicorn love my life all that a Lot of that there was those fake. I mean that was her playing to my values playing to what I wanted Well beyond the level that would be considered healthy a woman may be adopting what a man wants and responding to that Everything that everything the people not just women that basically told you what you wanted to hear and you were a predisposed and believe it Yeah, she told me I wanted to hear at a really extreme level just like her behavior wasn't just promiscuous. It was criminal I mean, this is like deliberately, you know prostitution in Florida is not legal. This is in Nevada So the behavior that people personality disorders do tends to be really exaggerated almost cartoonish And that's what she did the rampant lying the rampant cheating the prostitution like all this stuff It's very abusive behavior at a really bizarre level just like what that guy went through and she wasn't just kind of like lying A little bit about this. She had a whole life hidden behind like my ex-wife This is a whole double life so much so that when we split up or when I found this out I thought she has split personality disorder or multiple personality or something like that Because it was so uncharacteristic who she as she presented herself that persona It was like this is as nuts Like you have to be fucking crazy to be married and go suck dick for cash Like why like who does this like it's really rare that that happens See I was a whole shit show and I gave a speech on it and it's been four years now I've been single ever since and I tend to keep it that way for a little while longer I do look forward to getting into relationship in the future at some point one where the chick is not a Crazy cluster B cluster fuck as we call it cluster B being the spectrum of personality disorders that are considered dramatic By the APA the American Psychological Association whose idea was it to become exclusive initially who brought that up? She did I think yeah after how long you're dating About a month About a month. Yeah, when it was like the first red flag that you're like Oh, yeah, let's get into that. So there are plenty of red flags that well There's some there are some things about are they're positive like genuinely and I consider them kind of green flags For example, she didn't have a ton of shoes Most chicks like have always you know, they fucking like 50 pairs of shoes. It's nuts to me. She didn't she had like 10 or something I was like, that's reasonable. Like that's that's interesting. Most girls are like not like that She had a house and it was put together. It was clean and that was that was not just the beginning I was consistent for years and it wasn't like some weird She was older too, right? It was older than me. Yeah, that was that was a big mistake How many how many years older was seven seven years? Yeah, I mean she looked young though She looked a lot of people thought I was older than she was Growing up in Florida. I've always on the Sun and stuff So I've looked like a lot older than I am for years. It seems to be leveling out now at 30 31 But yeah, there are plenty of red flags like that movement I moved in with her really fast a few months after we started dating My lease ended on my place and it was you know convenient. It's how a lot of guys get ripped into that stuff So moved in too fast which is a big red flag that she would even want that moving too fast all that stuff and Women with personality disorders tend to push that stuff, too Like we mentioned earlier to women are good at you know seeing through your bullshit and finding chinks in your armor Women with personality disorders borderline personality disorder Antisocial personality disorder all that they're like that to the max Like they will not only find weak chink weak links you have and rip them open We'll find we'll generate more if they can we'll find insecurities and magnify them and amplify them So they're very destructive and that keeps you guessing and doubting yourself. They want me I did something wrong. Maybe maybe I was a little bit of a jerk and maybe I should apologize and they want to distort your sense of Reality between right and wrong and what what's true and what's what's false. I look gas like the hell out of you You know through the roof So it's a lot of very negative destructive behavior and it's it's their own unresolved trauma Mixing with some of yours, but they're like the active initiators of this stuff and they're for their predatory And like one of the things I mentioned the speech that people found pretty pretty interesting As most guys look at the sexual marketplace They'll go to girl and they want to I mean, this is super common in the man's fear and beyond that They rank a girl right 1 to 10, you know, she's a 10. She's a supermodel. She's super hot. She's exactly what they want You know across maybe a variety of factors physicality personality whatever it Boops, but looks you know age or whatever the case is Down to one there, you know overweight ugly hideous all that stuff I think it's actually a mistake and I think that women with personality disorder is actually represent negative value to your life So if you look at it like a diagram, you have like 10 Zero if they're like, you know hideous Then you have a negative 10 spectrum and I think that these women that you know the goes into the energy vampires They're vampires exactly they're vampires. I call them sharks like sharks swimming in the depths of the ocean You look at like an ocean But they really are predatory and they're dangerous to your life much more so than a normal woman even could be Even considering things like false rape allegations false domestic violence allegations Women like this are and men like this too, right? These people exist the vipers as we call them They're dangerous The possibility for cheating is way higher Relationship abuse emotional abuse false allegations. I was worried about that when I split up with her In Florida, for example, there's like a two-year statue and some of these false allegations for the server the first two years I was like, holy shit Is she gonna fall seek use me of whatever because she's pissed about the video She does she is aware of the video, of course, and she wants it taken down which I'm like, nope So that's that But yeah, I think women with personality disorders I mean, they're a chunk of the population just like men they say up to 15% of people have cluster B personality disorders And it's not always obvious, you know Some of these chicks will have a bunch of tattoos and they have very obvious daddy issues and they're kind of unhinged Those are like lower functioning versions of this But not a woman are like that. Some of them have these disorders and they're higher functioning They're able to navigate like my ex-wife for whatever reason smart clever motivated whatever the case is They'll navigate the tattoos zero tattoos zero. That's what I'm saying like dude I've personally found the more tattoos a girl has the higher they are in the crazy scale In a way that you can see that's that that's the problem with some of this So she had zero tattoos before I knew her with her and beyond. This is coming from a guy It's a several girlfriends that had tattoos. Yeah. Yeah, she had no it's not that I don't like women without tattoos It's just you tend to get a higher when I compare them versus women I've dated that had none the women had none had good relationships with their dad We're pretty level-headed The ones that had tattoos father was missing or they had several fathers so I kind of like girls that have tattoos because Now these things you're saying are true the issue is they're showing you their trauma They're physically expressing it on their body by you know marking up an organ their skin And that has problems with it like you're saying and I agree with you The issue is is when if they have those problems and they don't express them in a way that you see they hide them And those are the ones that are the most dangerous. They're covert narcissists. They're not overt people claim Trump's a narcissist and all that I think I disagree with that But at minimum he's expressing it openly and outwardly and it's obvious he is who he is You know it makes fun of people but you know, you know, whatever all stuff he does Yeah, it doesn't take shit from anybody. Yeah, if you hit him, he's gonna hit you back twice as hard That's just his philosophy. That's right. I even shared that quote it is on my yeah, punch back ten times harder The issue is is that narcissism is not I don't think he's disorder I don't think it's personality disorder But the way he expresses narcissism on purpose for strategy or whatever he's doing in his life Whatever goal he has business or presidency or whatever. He's expressing it openly and outwardly. It's over It's the covert narcissist male or female. They're a lot more dangerous Because they can warm their way into your life and into your head and into your value system And whatever trauma weaknesses you have and they they can just you know fester these problems in you Which can be good for you long-term if you survive But as you probably know guys kill themselves a lot of the time at least compared to women They kill themselves at 500% the rate the women do I've got a shit ton of emails over here Some guys have told me that you know my book my work was like kept them from offing themselves Because you know they hear stories like this and you're like, oh fuck it wasn't me I wasn't the problem. She was I just made a bad choice Yeah, and then you give them the skills that they need to make a good choice and find a good woman in the future Have a good relationship and completely change the paradigm I'll be straight with you man The first time I had any serious thought of suicide in my life was walking around my neighborhood as I was packing up my shit Moving out, you know from a Medusa And I was like wow, I fucking married a hooker And I was you know, this is not this is an accident. This is not a purpose and That was emotionally very traumatic. It was the first time in life. I had very serious Emotional trauma from a relationship like that Everything before that was you know peanuts compared to that. It was devastating. This is a woman that you know I lived with for you know over four years was married to you know loved her. She was my wife and She was out fucking sucking dick for cash and whatnot on the side the whole time not not all the time This wasn't like weekly activity. I think it was consistent every few months or something when she needed to get some extra cash Or for the excitement or whatever the fuck the reason was The validation, you know much choke a couple kids, you know chickens here and there and make some quick cash There's it's ironic you bring that up for reasons. I'll tell you when we get done Filming that I can't say on camera, but yeah, I choke some chickens. Yeah But like you mentioned to those so there was some things that were not you know, she had no weird piercing she had one She used to have one or belly button, but she took she got rid of it and she had a piercing You know just like on her ear lobes and that's it So there was no she wasn't covered to head to toe in tattoos There was anything weird like that. She was not overweight. She was put together She stayed fit the whole time we were together Super tried wife too. So I was one of the things too. She knew I wanted that kind of traditional life So she played up to that to the max and a lot of guys don't know this because I didn't mention that in the speech When I gave this at the time, this is you know, four years ago now about But dude, she she cooked and cleaned and you know, what is it stomach full of balls empty like to the max We fucked every day for like four and a half years and she would cook and clean like cook this extravagant stuff So in some ways it was a nightmare and other ways I had a fucking great time So she was able to completely come carp compartmentalize her life. Oh, yeah. Yeah, like do really yeah, that's that's that's you know I should have mentioned the speech. That's one of the reasons. It was so fucking bizarre Yeah, she compartmentalized. I mean she would I think she would literally go fuck guys like fuck a client in Naples, Florida We used to live down in South as Florida and then on the way home. What's such a show? She was she was good at covering her tracks She had reasons to go and do these things right to cover so I wouldn't get suspicious So she'd go to like Whole Foods after it She dropped like three four hundred dollars a Whole Foods almost exclusively on stuff for me like organic gluten-free grass fed like the most expensive shit You can imagine and so she's sharing you with praise and gifts for years for years, man That's what kept the illusion going. I was like, wow, this is amazing So when she really fucked up, she would spend a lot of money on you. Yeah, well, I think she would I think she would I don't know if she felt guilty or not. Maybe she didn't but yeah She would make all this cash and then she would just blow it on me like 80% of it So I kind of got paid she would fuck for cash and then she would pay me with gifts and shit from it So yeah, the end of the day, too I lost no money with my divorce so to speak the separation and I made out pretty cash positive for years of this check Because she just kept making money and blowing it on me like left and right Whatever the motivations behind that were I mean probably several wasn't probably singular Yeah, it was a really wild experience It's been a cornerstone of moving what's it's a period of my life. I'll never I'll never forget I mean how many times you're gonna marry a hooker in Vegas? We got married in Vegas, too By the way, I was my idea. We didn't meet in Vegas. We met in Florida We lived in Florida, but I wanted to get out of Florida. So I picked Vegas By the end of the day, you know, I didn't know she's a hooker So it's like I'm ready to hook her in Vegas like what else is new So what other kinds of red flags did you see along the way? Were there things you saw in the beginning that you were like that's not right about that But then you just dismissed it well one of them for example, I didn't know so there's a couple I didn't know how to interpret so for example when she didn't have tattoos I didn't understand why she didn't have tattoos which the end of the day I think it's because she had she has MPD. She's a narcissistic personality disorder So she's obsessed with her appearance to a ridiculously an unhealthy degree. So tattoos interfere with that That's the reason she didn't get tattoos not because she didn't have trauma She hid the trauma and expressed it in other ways so cheating prostitution and stuff like that So it's the tattoos are not as important as why someone has them or doesn't have them Which is what I realize now. So that's not That's advice people need to hear but it's not as easy to understand and apply in real life I mean, it's irresponsible for applying it and it's complicated sometimes. This is a really good example that I know chicks are Way less crazy than my ex-wife who have a bunch of tattoos that they just kind of own it It's just who they are they get marked up because they were traumatized or whatever Another one knows that her dad asked her early on because when our speakers talked about this and I liked it He was like always ask a woman what her relationship is like with her father So early on first or second day at aster's like what's relationship like with your dad and she pops back Oh, he died like a long time ago years ago Which was true and I had never had a girl that I wanted to bang before it, you know all that Wanted to date. I never had one say that to me It was you know dad was always alive because I was young I was 22 when I met her about to be 23 So that kind of like I was like, oh shit like a stuff in a landmine and so factually that was true Her dad had died years before, you know, I met her like 10 years or something like that But I didn't know how to handle that and it wasn't told, you know I don't know probably a year or two later that we got more into the issues You have with her father and what that was like So I asked a good question early on that men should ask generally But I was so young and inexperienced with that specific kind of question probing I didn't know how to handle it and of course, you know, I'm not having the father is a very deep wound and someone like that If she wasn't, you know that old she was like 30 at the time But yeah, not having a father. She never talked about the relationship. She had with him Well, she had played it like she didn't want to get into it because it was so painful Which is partly true. It's just later on. I found out how dysfunctional was and stuff like that and By that point we had already been together for probably here at that point. Yeah, that's one of the big things Man, it's like women to love their dads They're proud of them. They talk about them. Absolutely. And if you got a woman, it's evasive. Yes You know, you got to pay attention. So the basically the death was the tool to be evasive about it and You know, legitimately, that's a sensitive issue if your parent is fucking dead Mm-hmm, and I'm just popping off asking kind of randomly about that. So Yeah, there's a red flag I missed and frankly I didn't understand how to navigate it at that point when a girl's father had died at this point of her girl's father's dead. That's Unfortunate but it's almost a red flag in itself for girls if he dies when she's 30, but she doesn't want to talk about it Yeah, what 37 at the time? No, she was 30. She was 30 at the time. Yeah, and he died when how old was she when she was she was probably like 22 23 So it'd been you know many years not a super long time, but a good chunk of time. Yeah other red flags We get into Yeah, because girls have good relationships with their dads they've got you know if they're on social media They got pictures of their dads there they talk about their dads glowing They fucking love the shit out of them Yeah, because they look up to them and they admire them, but it's right if it's just a black hole Yeah, and you can't get any information Well, the relationship with the father is gonna reflect how they view men I mean that's this is like the longest running male relationship. They've had in their life So without that because he died or because it was abusive or whatever like yet It's a it's a bad thing. There was no uncles or grandfathers that she was close to or anything like that Actually met her her grandfather a great grandfather. Yeah, she did she was I met her grandfather one point up in Michigan She was close with him, but it wasn't like it wasn't like a father relationship It wasn't like a substitute. Yeah, she got into a jam or needed advice She's not gonna pick up the phone call him. Correct. Yeah, she was close with her grandma a lot too But her grandma died Probably two three years before I met her So that was the whole thing too, but some other red flags. She was a nurse an RN registered nurse Which honestly is kind of red flag like every nurse I've banged like a bunch of nurses since then and they all tend to be a little still kind of weird and kind of screwy So I didn't understand that at the time hairstylist nurse She's also a massage therapist at the Ritz and you know five-star hotel I'll be getting lots of shit comments from nurses going fuck you No, no, of course doesn't mean all of them. Yeah, of course not of course not but generally they tend to be like I mean look, I'm gonna tell you right now almost every nurse. I bang is fictits and I'm a big fan. I think fictits are wonderful The issue is it's like why do you have them outside of a relationship? I'm a do so did not a fictits what I met her, but she was a nurse and eventually in their relationship She did get fictits which I was like fuck. Yeah, it's fucking great She even paid for them. I didn't pay for them So that was great Anyway, though the nurse thing is a problem to be honest. She didn't pay for him. Yeah, that's right Oh, dude, there's actually I have so she was missing She was missing five six hundred bucks for the surgery right and she asked me to loan her like five six hundred bucks This was back in 2013 or something like that And we the convention coming up as I hey look I can't I can do there I know have a lot of expenses going on a lot of shit like just ask your sister or your brother something It'd be fun, you know, I just kind of brushed it off like nothing and she get push in I was like no Like I'm not doing it like I got shit going on besides your you know your sister your brother. You're fun Somebody be easy. These are they're older than her even right there were like late thirties and forties It was like it'd be easy it's five hundred bucks, right? She was gonna stay with her sister in California for the thing She did So I just assumed that she would do that I found out later I found the fucking text conversation She actually went to LA where she got the surgery and she fucked a guy then I'd throw the surgery for the five hundred bucks I have the fucking text conversation. I have the address like all the fucking shit And I was just like I found this like years later if I'm like holy shit even the specific five hundred bucks She went and fuck. I'm like you gotta be fucking kidding me. That's how specifics on the evidence I found was too and that's part of what made the speech compelling. It wasn't just me claiming this I had I had a written confession from her and some of the stuff I had evidence that found through text messages phone numbers all kinds of shit So it was a fucking shit show So we're talking about, you know, the red flags and stuff There was numerous little ones like that and then those are mixed in with some kind of green flags Like she don't have crazy amount of shoes, which honestly is pretty rare She had zero tattoos. I thought that was pretty good And at face value those kind of things are good The end of the day. I did not have the experience With women or in life to navigate some of the more complex ones that were she was hiding things or compensating for things too An example would be the elaborate dinners and grocery shopping. She would do after she fuck somebody like that for cash It did not occur to me that those are like little intermittent extravagances It would happen and that would typically now looking back on it You can say that's probably after she just fuck somebody else because she felt guilty about it. Exactly. Yeah So she's trying to make up for it and it's a way to compensate for that Yeah, exactly and a way to express it and then she you know fucking blow me all stuff and whatever Yeah, it was It was a bizarre experience men super bizarre Learned a lot from it like I'm glad it happened. I didn't get any STDs from it. Thank God when I fight when I figured out She's prostitute. I merely went to get you know, tracked and I was like when I remember when they called me I was actually started crying when like a week later I got the results and I had zero STD is a I thought I was I thought I had something I'm like, there's no free last free last. Thank God almighty. We are free. I didn't know if I had fucking HIV Fucking herpes. Fuck. No, I had nothing at the end of the day But I figured I had something and I didn't and I was like so you were gonna be Charlie Sheen, huh? Yeah, exactly. I didn't know I was like dude. I mean this this hit me so fast like a ton of bricks It was just wild But the other day I learned a lot about women a lot about myself It was a pivotal experience in my life and the speech I think it's an expression of that I think that's why it's part of the reason it's gone viral I think you talked about it was something very relational for men to learn from and it's very raw I curse a lot in the video probably too much But you know, it's an expression of the passion intensity of what I went through lots of cursing happens on my channel Yeah, yeah, I tend to be my monetization detriment But I take all challengers for dropping f-bombs and I tend to win I have a few close like Hunter drew a buddy of mine on our speakers. We both dropped like a bunch of f-bombs and we speak Yeah, it was a wild experience and I'm glad it happened I'm glad I made the mistakes I did with her with the red flags for example Because ultimately that relationship was long-term useless like I should have never been in the first place at minimum due to the age Quite frankly in your line of work I mean the way I look at things is what happened happened and it couldn't have happened any other way That's right. It had to happen. Yeah for you to you know, because that makes you a better speaker or better coach a better teacher Well, now you got something that some some kid might be 16 18 19 years old and they hear it And then five years from now they start dating girl and those little things are happening That's right. I remember when president Johnson experienced that well I knew you know for example the speakers that I can mention for years I talked about you know energy vampires and women who are you know toxic for you and not good for you And I would hear that and I didn't really understand it and looking back on it I can see why I didn't understand it because I'd never experienced it at a very visceral in your face level I had bang girls all these girls in college and stuff, but they were like the worst ones were just kind of like You know wild party chicks that were kind of like unhinged and shit with tattoos and whatnot Which comparatively is not that bad versus a professional hooker who's good at manipulating men and getting money from them and you know didn't all this toxic shit So I had to learn the hard way that there are dangerous women out there. There are dangerous people in general But when you put your dick in a woman that you like and you want to have sex with and make a family with her Whatever, you know, literally reproduced with that makes you compromised and it puts you in a very vulnerable position Now you're attached to an outcome. That's right. Yeah I think we literally got married. We had a wedding. Anyway, I mentioned the private marriage We never got legally married, but we did have a wedding that both families come out We had a honeymoon in Hawaii for a week. We traded rings vows and she took my last name So she went to the courthouse spent, you know, four five hundred bucks had me passport social security card driver's license All that shit took my last name So we had all the mechanics of a marriage minus the legal entanglements that I refused to get in She pushed for that and I was like, it's not happening. Get the fuck out here And I got pushed back from my family to her family on that and I was like, I don't care Like take it or leave it for you for standing around man. Thanks. Yeah Yeah, a few people that's masculinity there. It's like, no, yeah, not willing to compromise even a means means you leave You know what I'm a good good friend of mine. He he was uh, this is back We were in our 20s and he was engaged and his then fiance was gilded shit about something and he didn't like like I don't know what she said But she was kind of I think at a way threatening about something and he was just like, well, give me my ring back. Nice. She looked She was taken back and you know, she started crying and you know, he was He he was gonna do what he wanted. He was a good guy and he's still with her to this day almost fucking 30 years later. Wow He's one of the few few guys I listened to when When we talk about dating Put down as probably part of the reason that relationship is stood for so long Yeah, having the boundaries and the enforcement of those boundaries. He's gotten softer a little bit Which happens there because women don't stop They're always going to test you always gonna test your strength or testosterone declines over time too that too But you know, they're they're like the fucking Borg you will be a little late in me Resistance is futile They're not going to stop. It's just they're driven that way. They're you know, feminine energy is driven to test Masculine strength. You know, you just you act like a bitch. You're gonna get treated like one. That's right That's harsh reality. You like it or not. It's like, sorry I didn't make women this this way. You don't like it. Talk to the big man upstairs Now we're gonna make women great again. Now we're gonna make women great again at the convention So What at what point did tell me about how it all unraveled we're like your perfect world just What tell me this I mean things at the end were pretty rocky anyway But we started a wedding anniversary and it was February 2nd. We got married on Super Bowl Sunday actually that year in 2014. It was But things were not It didn't look like I was gonna wake up in a few weeks like I did and find out she was a fucking cheating hooker So you are already not getting along before it blew up Uh at the end. Yeah, so in other words, the honeymoon period was definitely over and you were starting to see here for what she really was There was it was starting to come through I think the mass this happens in toxic relationships with legitimate covert narcissists. They can only keep the mask on for so long No, that depends on their motivation and other factors like how competent are they how smart are they In her case, I think she was highly motivated for whatever reason from pain trauma Whatever, right like one of my friends said her her marriage to me was a scream for normalcy She had been not normal for so long had been a prostitute for so long Had lived this kind of double life that she wanted to get away from it And she saw me as a pathway or tool for doing that along with whatever other motivations and fucked up shit she had going on Uh, but yeah, so eventually the the mask slips whether that's you know, six months in two years in or in my case A little bit over four years and things started getting starting to unravel How would that look like what specifically happened? Oh man, that's a whole fucking was it fighting or you're not getting along was she being visioned to you like I don't even know where to beginner There's some of the stuff I can't share on camera because I don't have evidence for it So I don't want to get like defamation stuff. Yeah, but layman's terms you give us like a cliff notes version She did some things because you know the people watch this you're gonna want to how do I spot a girl like this That's you know, really going to be the takeaway. Would obviously the red flags are you got too serious too fast? Yes You um Which is bad in general But it's especially bad when a woman is pushing like, you know full speed no breaks for that stuff That's the symptom of personality disorder. It's not a girl that likes you too much and just kind of digging into it Like too much. It's that there's an agenda behind it. There's a there's a it's fake basically Yeah Um, so you want to keep going into it though? Yeah, well the red flags that so overall, what are the what are the red flags? You miss that, you know, so they're the 18 20 the 22 year old guys that's watching this that He doesn't know yet, but maybe next week or in a couple weeks. He's gonna meet a similar girl It's like yeah, what's he got to be in the lookout for? Uh, number one if it, you know, this is a very old school saying but it's true And if it's too good if it sounds or looks too good to be true, it probably is So in this case, you know her being Being older was a problem in itself But her being just this girl who happened to be single and all this stuff It was hot and you know, it was really into me. It's it was just too much too fast Especially with the values and the way she's playing to what I you know telling me I don't want it to hear Not just telling me but acting to what I wanted to hear too I even had a friend early on which when he one of my best friends met her We did a camping trip together. I did a camping trip every year of my friends We had you know from 10 to 20 of us went out And actually said to me and this is very common for these kind of relationships with people of a personality disorder He said, uh, dude, she's like a male aversion of you And he meant that sincerely and he meant to I think it's a compliment at the time The problem is that she was not a male version of me And you don't want I don't think you should want that anyway men and women are different and You don't need a fucking you know a female version of yourself with tits I don't think that's a healthy relationship to have It's okay to be different from your partner or from your you know your girlfriend or whatever But anyway, she was you can have similar goals or values or you're gonna be clashing all the time You should yeah, but there's room for differences too and they can be substantial Uh, you don't have to have like all the same hobbies for example and shit like that Yeah, I had a girlfriend that was a uh socialist and I just yeah, we butted head on heads on just so many things that We saw the world completely opposite in a lot of ways. Yeah, it's like trying to have that discussion. It's like It doesn't work I don't have the patience for that Maybe i'm a dick for that, but I don't care. Well, my friend making that comment though that to me This is actually studied and talked about in uh books and things like that that discuss these kind of toxic relationships It's a really early sign that your friends will notice The partner whether you're male or female or wherever the girl is sort of the words the red flag is she's Putting on an an act and she's she's so much like you she's too much like you and that that should be concerning Yes, it should be concerning especially if your friends are noticing it Not just you because you're in the middle of it and you're the target I mean, this is literally predatory behavior. You're the target and you're mostly compromised because you're physically compromised You're pair bonding the hormones the orgasms all that stuff So yeah, she's if it's if she's too much like you and your friends are noticing it That's a big flag big red flag Even if they don't see it as a bad thing you should Uh, she should be you know different from you. She shouldn't be the exact same I don't think she should be a socialist if you're a maga, you know, trump supporter or whatever Yeah, that goes over like a lead balloon with the socialist. Yeah. Yeah Um, if you're maga's swipe left, yeah Honestly, you know, I know some of your fans meant I like it the girls But you know, uh massage therapists tend to be really like odd They tend to have a lot of weird beliefs and she even she even told me this like all her friends Yeah, they're all like nuts Well, they honestly they are like I've met other massage therapists and they tend to be like in a really weird stuff Hey, it's a free country deary thing. But it's like the hairstylist, right? Hairstylist girls are always like kind of wild Uh, you know good for a night. Maybe not good for you know a relationship or building a family Uh nurses again, not in all cases though So I'll be getting out of there of course, of course not but a lot of them Uh, similarly, you don't you know, this isn't this is another level, but you don't intentionally date strippers Like they're notorious for having unlimited problems Any guy I ever know who's been banging strippers or knows them or worked at a nightclub. They will tell you Female strippers have unlimited fucking problems So you don't date them. Like if you want to bang one, I mean, all right, you know, so, you know, take your swing man Go for it But you don't want to build a family with one usually unless you're just crazy as shit Um, but she was you know, both a nurse and uh, you know massage therapist, which is like A double whammy of crazy So, you know take the profession seriously if she's working somewhere and doing something like what is she doing? Particularly if she's using her body Not in her case, she wasn't but I would say in general If a woman is using her body and her physicality to get money in her job, that's a bad thing Even something the bartender If she's a bartender, some girl you're into is a bartender to bar She's constantly wearing push-up bras to get more tips Her it's been normalized for her to use sexuality to get money to make it like super transactional Not like a relationship or trading values, but she's literally trading sexuality for cash And that's not prostitution, but that's not healthy. It's not healthy at least for someone You want to build a relationship with in my opinion? I'll eat wool and let me say this it's something to watch out for Just like tattoos, right? Maybe not the end of the world. Maybe, you know, some bartenders are worth dating A lot of them make or not Because they're constantly trading the woman anyway sex for money or sexuality for money You don't want that in your life Unless you just want to go go that angle and you know go to town I've been there done that and wouldn't recommend it So those last few months you guys were together you said it was already were you just not getting along? What was what was different? What had changed? I mean she tried shutting that she tried this early on and she tried it again later She tries sort of example six months after we got married. She tried shutting the sex off To whenever she wanted Whereas up to that point this has been this had been two and a half three years at this point We had sex every day whenever I wanted which is every day I'm just you know, I'm super young super horny like that, right? Hi, libido And she just had this whole hissy fit and you know, she wouldn't fuck like that anymore I was like, hey, I didn't and not early on I told her this to her face. I even say this in the speech I was like, hey, like I didn't sign up for that. I love you, but I'm not okay with that We've been having sex every day pretty much for you know years and we're gonna keep doing that or I'm gonna leave Tomorrow like in 24 hours. I'm gonna end this whole thing and we're fucking done I did not sign up for that She of course, it was huge hissy fit and screaming and shit and I'm like, whoa But of course, we're gonna be fucking for years after that or whatever year and a half or something She tried this again at the end. It was kind of a repeat of the six month thing Because a lot of this is planned, right? It's all fake. It's her playing to what I want to hear doing what I want It's not real and it's not genuine fashion So do you wish you knew you feel that she was never in love with you never really cared It was all an act in her part. That's a good question. That's something I've I've thought a lot about I think early on it was a lot more genuine Uh, just the newness of it and stuff like that. I'll be that could be bullshit too though It's hard to say a good book you should read 3 man. Yeah. Yeah interesting. Yeah, I look for I ordered my copy today actually Yeah, get your book now understanding relationships.com. Oh by the way You can definitely get you can read 3 man and mastering yourself my second book at understandingrelationships.com Like I do subscribe to email newsletter So it is a really good question Part of it why it's complicated to answer is I don't know if she's even capable of loving someone Genuinely and in a meaningful way in an adult mature way. I really don't know And that's not just unique to her that's unique that's specific to anyone with a personality disorder That makes relationships basically impossible Like one of the key characteristics of women with borderline personality disorder is abandonment issues Usually from a dad. So we call these daddy issues in everyday language, but really it's abandonment issues And basically they're so dysfunctional in their personality and their psychology They make it impossible to be in a long-term relationship with them They engage in behaviors that make it impossible to stay with them So in her case for example, uh, I told her early on I have zero tolerance for violence domestic violence and zero tolerance for cheating You ever hit me? You ever cheated on me? I'm gone immediately. Which in the end is what I had to do She acted and now she did she cheated on every boyfriend she ever had as far as I know That's what she told me like you mentioned that in the earlier tooth some of the other stuff. She told me flat out I was like, whoa And of course that was never disclosed because that would have made me watch out. Yeah, you found that out at the end I found that out at the end now that so she hid a lot of stuff to like you mentioned some of the red flags She put to her credit She put in the effort to hide a lot of this as best she could And then on top of that there was some what appeared to be genuine green flags like the no tattoos So a lot of this was convincing especially when I was young and did no better um Don't know where I was going with that but uh somewhere interesting We were talking about red red flags things to look for yeah, how things spiraled out of control. Yeah at the end. Yeah, yeah, yeah Yeah, I mean it wasn't it wasn't like we were about to get divorced any day But you know things were not as good at the end. I think the mass was slipping She was getting tired of the act for whatever reason it had served whatever purposes she wanted like for example One of the speakers the guy who married us actually I had a speaker be the officiator basically in vegas He said Later on that he thought a lot of the marriage to me or the wedding specifically to Was to like get back at her mom like her mom was there obviously And there was some animosity that we didn't know a lot about between her and the mom So marrying me was kind of like ha ha I can do it and like fuck you kind of thing like a like a revenge kind of thing And that was a support for that Oh, you mentioned the love thing Yeah, so the acting ways to make it impossible to date them long term and in my case I like I mentioned I had zero tolerance explicitly for Violence any kind of dv and any kind of cheating zero What I didn't understand for example and telling her that it's good to have clear boundaries like that It's good to put your foot down and make that clear off the bat In her case that was this information That was like intel like oh now I know what I have to hide Don't ever let him know because there'll be no forgiveness and there wasn't The minute I found out she was cheating I took the ring off in like 10 15 minutes And within an hour I had announced to my you know my family and friends that were done That's it leaving as soon as I can And I did leave in real life probably four or five days later. I had to pack up all my shit, you know moved to Orlando Where were you living at the time? I'll be hikers fort meyers. It's almost for misery. Yeah for misery. Yeah See is another mistake that's where I'm from. Yeah That's my hometown Friend of mine is from fort meyers. I went to high school with and he used to always call it for misery But that was that was 30 years ago. It's obviously changed a lot since it's probably not any better I'm actually from Cape Coral Cape coma Home of the nearly dead newly wed. I don't want the high school for meyers. So I know the area pretty well They were living in lehigh acres, which is it was right on the border of fort meyers like right nearby Yeah, but I wanted to get away from her. I knew I was like this is first of all I'm holding true to my values. What I what I fucking said, which is zero dv She never had me. So that's fun and vice versa obviously and zero cheating. I never cheated on her So how did you find out that also did you see her phone? Like what was what was the magic? What was pandora's box? It was a while basically I had like a sneaking suspicion without without really too much to go on I just kind of like a gut feeling I was like something, you know for a few months I did not write but something didn't feel right like in that this was like in january 2016 I was like, I wonder if she's fucking cheating and just lying about it, right? So, you know being living together she had a desktop computer that she would do a work off of And I went looked around just kind of snooping, you know, which is rude or whatever But given they were together it felt appropriate given the gut feeling that I had So I did and I found nothing And I was like fuck like am I just being a fucking asshole? Like why don't I this is my wife? Like why don't I trust her like this is being stupid? So I let it go for about two weeks. So I was like, all right I'm just being I'm just being ridiculous and being paranoid, you know Kind of a lot of the shit they would tell men today, right to feel this stuff Like from a feminist perspective like toxic masculinity like I'd be so controlling, right? But I trust I was even two weeks. Trust your guy. Yeah So two about two weeks later. I'm like man something, right? Like something feels off And like my gut kept saying like there's something on this fucking computer that's gonna fucking tell me something I don't want to hear and I don't want to see So I looked again and this time I found I'd run into a different folder. I hadn't seen before And it wasn't the pornographic or anything, but I'd found pictures over with this guy And it was obvious to me right off the bat that they were like fucking or whatever They had been kissing and one just kind of like intimate, you know pictures like that And this is pretty recent these look like they were from a few months ago or something So, you know, that's same. I found this stuff and I was fucking furious. I'm like, oh, she's fucking cheating. We're fucking done. Holy fuck So I was a little cluster fuck So I called my best friend over my best man at the wedding and he came over And she was out a movie with a friend that night. I think legitimately some chick that I used to I think I'd actually met her a couple times So she came back home and as she walks in I have the pictures pulled up on her desktop And I'm just sitting there in this chair and I'm like so many times you fuck this guy Just like my friend is over here like oh my god I gotta go man. Hey, hey, you ain't got a meeting I forgot about Oh, she was she was deer in the headlights like Like she it just absolutely froze whole body absolute deer in the headlights froze But I invited my friend over too because I was again at this point. I knew everything was done I knew she was cheating and I was worried about as a witness basically Yeah, false tv, you know false right ballad stuff So I'm glad I brought him over and then from there she actually denied everything. It was so obvious too We were both like you're just full shit like you obviously you're fucking this guy I knew enough I knew enough about pickup and you know body language was like you're definitely This is so obvious to me you're fucking this guy like You know don't even deny it and about a day later a day and a half later She finally owned up to it And then she kept trying to keep me in the relationship keep her up then I was like we're done Like this is not a discussion. I told you fucking no on any of this shit and you cheated we're done So eventually I think in desperation or whatever other motivations She started kind of spilling even more truth trickle truth. We call it in the red pill part of the atmospheric trickle truth, right? And eventually that led to she had been cheating the whole time on and off of all kinds of guys And then she let slip the prostitution thing kind of like off the hand. I'm like what say it come again It was a part And I was about to leave like a day. I left like a day later anyway But that little slip is what led me to actually dig through I mentioned the speech I ended up digging through her phone records because we had like a shared account Email records stuff like that And that's when I found all the prostitution So this all happened like super fast too. This happened like 10 days From we're together no cheating, but I was a little bit suspicious To one guy to a bunch of guys to escort style prostitution Yeah, and then she spent about three months trying to get me back Uh, now she didn't know that I knew about the escorting. I let I kept that hidden I kept that card in my in my until I put the speech out and nobody knew that shit except like, you know, some of my close friends But for a few months until until like may I think of 2016 Uh, she would just keep sending me nudes and all kinds of stuff and trying to you know Elaborate messages trying to get me back in everything imaginable to fucking claw me back in find the chink in the armor and fucking claw me back in And fortunately I had moved to Orlando so put distance between us and two She didn't know where I lived. You know, she's trying to find it And three I had good friends like the speakers telling me like do not fucking go back to this chick Like if you're a firm on what you believe, which they knew I was you're treating like there's no there's no future And I was like, that's right So as tempting as it was to go fuck her just to you know, all that kind of relationship trauma and stuff Which a lot of people do they get rubbed in like that I stayed away from it And then uh, she eventually I think gave up and then she got engaged two weeks later To that guy? Uh, to that guy, yeah And married him for real I think so they well they got married in November Uh, I don't know if it was legal. He's probably all happy with himself. I you know, I got my dream girl She was with a loser and I totally saved her and rescued her from her horrible life and No, the funny part is I put the speech out like a couple days before the wedding just because I'm a dick So I put that out and then she found out and she was you know screaming and stuff about it Like take it down like nope Like don't give a fuck At this point. I have no idea what she's up to she changed her last name again, obviously and her first name So like I have no idea what she's up to people. She changed her first thing. Yeah. Yeah, that's I mean I'd say you tell the the identity crisis the identity issues. Yeah, you change in your first name That's it's pretty wack She tried that when she was a me when you change your last name She wanted to change her first name And I found that you know bizarre. I'm like no Like you're not fucking doing that or I'm like we're done like this is your fucking discussion. It's weird Unless you have a really really really good reason like your parents named you like Fart or something Short of that. I think that's pretty weird. The last name doesn't make sense obviously Be the first name. That's a big no no that was a red flag too. I missed I just took that as That was a you know a few months into marriage you change her name And the fact that she even wanted that I thought that was weird and you know, I put my foot down on it But I didn't I didn't understand The one for that is a red flag in itself like why would you even want that? All of a sudden at you know, 30 some years old you want to change your first name That's not your last name. Oh, she wanted to change her first name. Yeah When you guys got married, yeah And so after we spooled up she went and did that on her own obviously Oh, wow Gotta cover our tracks for the next the next victim as he comes along. It might be for the speech I mean, obviously the speech that has her name in it, which was the time was merrily johnson At this time, I don't know what her name is. That's like that's so crazy max wife is I don't even know what her fucking name is Like I literally if you put a gun in my head and asked me what her name was and said tell me I don't fucking know. She literally deleted herself from your life on the internet or from the internet Yeah to hide from the speech Yeah, wow, I mean it's gonna make it hard for her to uh I had a guy that uh I did a phone session with how many years ago it was but he'd been with his wife, I think like 30 years and I think they had three or four maybe it was five or six kids. He had a lot of kids. I remember that And he was just sitting at home one time and his best friend was over And his I think it was his daughter or his son was kind of sitting in his best friend's lap and he was sitting there going Wow, my my kid sure looks a lot like my best friend. Oh my god But you know that happens man at the end of the day this guy and he was a nice guy pretty successful He he'd like I said he'd been with us chick like 30 30 years And she was just a nymphomaniac fucking anyone and everyone she'd fucked his business partner She fucked his neighbors. She fucked all of his friends. She fucked his best friend Who is his best man in his wedding? Yeah, and out of his five or six kids Whatever it was there were two or three of them weren't even his wow, and it didn't dawn on him until he recognized it Man, my kid doesn't look anything like me, but sure looks a lot like my best friend Oh my god, and then you know that's you know he confronted her about it and yeah And uh, she of course denied it but when he went to his other friends and people that knew they were it was like the The worst kept secret and the whole name everybody knew that she was like fucking half the neighborhood and fucking all his friends his business partners and He was the last guy to find out. I think my ex-wife tried to do that Uh, I don't think she succeeded as far as we know Speakers and friends and things like that Um, I think though that she was looking for the opportunity to do that for sure Just for the thrill of it and the kicks a little payback payback. Yeah. Yeah. I mean after How dare you mess up her evil plans? Yeah, yeah So, I mean at the end of the day, I don't know if that for a fact But as far as I know that didn't happen But it's certainly I think I believe firmly that was on her mind And she was always looking like a chess player looking for openings and opportunities to get you like to do shit like that Looking back on it now with the lens that I have for the relationship like a red pill lens so to speak That was another interesting thing too is when I figured out When it snapped for me who she was in early 2016, february or march. It was actually march by that point Um, it really gave me a lens to look back on the whole four and a half year relationship Like an autopsy almost like a relationship autopsy And the whole relationship made a lot more sense to me then I mean, it's been an evolution since then a process for understanding it and growing from it But really it was it was seeing through all the layers of her masks and the fake personas and all that crap And it's like whoa I now have the ability to see four and a half years of reality rather than the fake illusion that she had presented And it was very educational a very extreme form of female behavior That I got to be up close and personal with that that's pretty extreme. Yeah, cool. So as you were saying Yeah So I guess one of the last things I'll say is that I'm really happy that it happened Kind of like you mentioned it happened another way could have happened In particular too in the you know, some of the advice I followed from Nathaniel Brandon, you know him He was a former lover of iron rand Therapists do psychotherapists. Yeah The original version of Atlas shrug was dedicated to him Lever and she you know, once they split up, you know, she fucking changed that but the early copies will show that Anyway, one of the things he says is that you know, everything that happened in your life You know, it's led to who you are today You need to own it, you know for better and for worse So that experience has in part like you mentioned led to who I am today. It's it was educational It was uh, you know, a very provocative story. I got to put out to the world I even had lion's gay reach out to me at one point about doing a tv show for it They make the movies like john mccain stuff So it was a hell of an experience so I learned a lot from it and um, it's part of my life You can't undo it I'm also happy that I got to make these red flag, you know, missing red flags and all these mistakes I made with her I got to do that, uh, like I mentioned earlier a little bit in what really was a useless relationship long term It had its meaning in my life then and it has some lingering meaning now like an after effect education and you know all that But you know, I made these mistakes with the women who I didn't belong with so it's like I didn't get any stds. I didn't lose any money Nothing too serious like that. No kids or anything So I made out for how toxic the relationship was not crazy. She was I made out really good And I got to make these mistakes kind of like training wheels with the women that ultimately didn't matter And in the future, I know the next relationship I get into will be with the much better women Hard to do worse but much better And it'll be much healthier more positive the feeling relationship and it won't have the kinks and the problems Well, some of the kinks Hopefully, yeah, none of the goals learn and not make the same mistake over and over exactly Yeah, and I got to make mistakes with the woman that just for any number of reasons even even physically being older than me Like I didn't belong with her So it's a good thing that it happened and it's a good thing that happened with her and then I made it out I made out really well Uh, also you mentioned to you whether or not you love me and it's that's a tough question, dude Um, just from a just from a psychology mental health perspective I don't really know, you know, if she's capable of that with me or anyone And then how much was genuine how much was fake how much was played up It's like Some of that you can look at with a red pill lens and kind of see through the bullshit But some of it is so personal and subjective to her You you don't know but you can't see inside of her head You're gonna see what's on the outside the behaviors the mannerisms all these things So even in a best-case scenario, it's like I don't really don't know There's a part in my uh my book I call it the attraction level table and it goes through things that the higher woman's attraction things that she does And you know, you can kind of gauge based on her actions the things she's doing the things she's saying how she feels about you because In a long-term relationship, it's gonna go up and down. So it's you know, it's really helpful for a lot of it's the chapter It's called it's all in numbers and then a three percent man book And so it's really helpful for you know, a lot of my people my audience a lot of clients If they're able to to gauge because if she ain't feeling it, she's just simply not going to do those things Yep. Yeah, in the monastery we say that desire cannot be negotiated. It's says to be very raw very natural And otherwise and if you don't have that you don't have a relationship. She's just your roommate or something Yeah, so So what was the the title of the whole thing for people to be able to find and watch the whole Title the full title of the speech it's still on youtube miraculously It hasn't been banned yet or censored although it is censored in australia You can't watch it from australia for some reason australia banned it The full title of the speech is marrying medusa how to survive a female psychopath Also, one of our speakers put together a course that we filmed from recently and uh, it's Not from me. He's a speaker. He gave the course That course is actually called female psychopaths from surviving and thriving And it's for guys who went through like me a toxic relationship like that and how to heal from that Specifically and move on and do better in life So they can go to female psychopath.com So what about that? Female psychopath.com on the proud owner of female psychopath.com. Yeah They'll see that in the speech I actually watermarked it with that Because I at the time I had been intending to do a blog uh on female psychopath theme That you know personality disorders And actually put together an aggregate blog of speakers that would contribute to that At the end of the day, I'm not going to do that. We're doing the product instead of my friends doing it But it's same. It's the same Intent to help men have been through like super toxic relationships like that Not just a bad breakup with some girl you met at a bar like a really noxious Fucked-up relationship People get hurt. There's criminal stuff going on prostitution Sugar-babying shit like that or violence and you know beyond So a lot of men go through it. I mean, there's a good chunk of men and women who have real personality disorders that are super toxic and dangerous And their predators like I mentioned the value thing. They're like a negative, you know, they exist beneath the surface And you've got to watch out And uh as a man today, too, you know, it's not Haste makes waste as they say Yeah, yeah, take things slow Watch being attached to your outcome Yeah, because we we tend to project our fantasy Oh, yeah onto the person and what we want and then we look for reasons to justify why they fit it And then when these little things come up, it's just like oh, but the connection is so great You know with the sex is amazing. We jive so well. I'm gonna go ahead and move in We I know we won't be dating a month, but it's meant to be the universe has Prearranged it and it's just it's amazing. It's going to be amazing and we're amazing. It's going to be awesome Yeah, everything's amazing till it blows up in your face. Yeah So you got got to take your time that you know, I've done so many videos over the years That's the biggest part of the problem with a lot of guys is they're too fucking impatient They want the relationship now with the marriage now with the kids now They want the business success now. They want the ceo job now It's like you have to go through a set of steps You can't put the car before the horse because if you do Yeah, you end up having a um, marion medusa. That's right You know one of our speakers nick spark used to say that fires that burn fast tend to burn out Uh fires that burn slow they tend to last, you know quite a bit longer See, I agree with you a hundred percent like slow the fuck down Especially for a relationship, but really anything in life. I agree takes time I've been running my business now for example for almost 14 years 13 and a half years And you know most businesses fail by 10 years like 95 percent of them or something like that four to five years Is what most of them have failed by yeah, that's right Yeah, so it takes time And it takes other things too courage dedication persistence But really if you just have patience with these things I think it works out a lot better Like I've been single now for four years and that's so long the girls get like Really curious about that when they find that out like why are you single for so long? Because they're whatever, you know reasons they have for getting curious about it But I think being single for so long is actually setting me up for a really good relationship Because I've been navigating the marketplace in the meantime watching how the world's been changing with me too and all this crap And feminism in America But also learning about myself healing from my own, you know experiences and trauma and stuff Is growing as a man and figuring out like what do I want like I do want a family and kids and these things But it's like okay at what point In what way and with what kind of woman do I want to be the mother of my children? That's a really serious endeavor to take on And I was 20 20 year plus commitment. That's right. And I was fucked that up last time marrying prostitute in vegas So I'd prefer not to fuck that up again And I do know for example that the chances of uh divorce for like a second marriage and third are pretty bad They're even worse than the first So knowing, you know, some of the basic stats on that knowing the challenges that you know as a young man You have to overcome today There's a lot of there's a lot on the table to learn about and at 31 i'm not in a rush As as eager as I am to start a family I know that it's more important to be patient and slow the fuck down take my time Be single as long as I want and in the meantime have fun There's plenty of women out there waiting for me and they don't have fun and hook up as I always say TH is the magic formula Yeah, and people come after me for you know hooking up with girls still even though we promote You know more traditional things for men and women and stuff sometimes and I'm like I didn't cause these girls. I didn't make these girls hook up with me They did this on their own and especially if they already bang like, you know 2030 guys Like I didn't I had nothing to do with you banging these guys I was 100% your choice as a woman now. You want me to be 31? Like All right, you're an equal opportunity seducer. I'm an equal opportunity seducer. That's right. That's right I don't take responsibility for other people's actions Uh, you know I'm responsible for my choices and my behavior. I was you know Uh, significantly responsible for my experience of medusa. I walked into that Not knowing any better and whatnot, but I'm It's my job as a young man to know better and you know, I've failed to do that in some ways and that had consequences But it's the same thing for young women, you know I'm not responsible for the actions my ex-wife took that I was not even aware of This is a person who was dedicated to that kind of behavior Was not going to change it for anyone including me and including anyone else as far as I know And young woman today too I'd hook it up like I want you to change. I think you should do better than that I think woman for example should have as much sex as possible over a lifetime with as few men as possible That seems to be a recipe loosely speaking for happiness for them But you don't want to listen. You want to bang a bunch of dudes on tinder like go ahead Uh, you're gonna find out the hard way that that's the older you get the more you appreciate quality relationships and quality people when you're younger You know, especially like when I was in my 20s I had a lot of more people I thought were my friends, but they were really just acquaintances And it's as you go through some ups and downs in life You realize who's who's really on your team and who's just there for the free shit or The significance or the clients or the money or whatever that whatever it is that they're they're getting from you That was the thing too when I you know had the divorce so to speak and went to Orlando It's like who's gonna step up and support me when I was hurting like the worst And who just you know is kind of come back out of it and move away from it So it was a litmus test for people in my life And you know much to my my pleasure most people in my life stood up very strongly for me Uh, whatever I needed to help me out even Socrates one of our speakers He gave me a place to live at his house for like two weeks before found a place to live So it took me in immediately insisted on it even And he had a he had a newborn baby at the time too. Elizabeth Grace's little daughter So he I was living in this house. It's a big house But you know, he had a four-week-old baby and I just moved in after divorcing a hooker And I'd known these people I'd known you know I was you know the wife and obviously the guy and stuff So yeah people stepped up for me and it was it was good to see that And that was a result of building strong positive relationships in my life People would not just freak out and abandon me or the conference people thought the conference would fall apart at the convention Because the founder had messed up and married this crazy bpd hooker And that was not the case the speech has done super well. It's one of the highest videos in the whole channel The highest one is you know, we have couple we have videos over a million But mine's done really well 400 000 and the conference has moved on We've had you know, I don't even know half a dozen conferences since then or something like that conventions We've had 18 total now. We've had bigger and better speakers You know since then just to find my only new FBI agents navy seals like what kinds of stuff What is the website? How do the people get in touch with that? Yeah, they go to the 21 convention org the 21 convention.org Or on youtube they go to youtube.com slash t1 or search for 21 studios Cool to find all that stuff And again, if you haven't read my bookshot, you can read a boat and free go to understandingrelationships.com Or you can do subscribe to the email newsletter press the submit button and you'll be reading it right on whatever device And if you'd like to book a coaching session with yours truly to especially if you're in a situation Similar to what president johnson was in you're going something a little squirrely here That's a big part of what I do with phone sessions with people because i'm an unattached Unemotional person that can see things for What they really are and I you know at this point, I think I've talked to tens of thousands of dudes over the years It's done phone sessions with so I've Most things I've heard many many many times. So just go to understandingrelationships.com click the products tab top of your screen And until next time We will talk to you soon