 So, I just found out that Pat Robertson is not only still alive till this day, but he's still on television for whatever reason. Now, I don't want to propagate any conspiracy theories, but it is entirely possible that he died a long time ago and that a reptilian is controlling his body or a puppeteer is making him move and talk. But either way, he's here on The 700 Club and he is still dishing out some really piping hot takes and his latest is a doozy. So he claims that God told him who's going to win this election and what will happen subsequently afterwards. Now, what I find interesting about this take is that if God is real, do you honestly think that he cares about like an election that's taking place, something that we think is important on this random planet, around this random star in a random galaxy in one of what may be infinite universes and infinite timelines? Why would God, who's omnipotent and benevolent give a shit about our election, if he's going to talk to you about anything, wouldn't he give you the secrets of the universe? But nonetheless, Pat Robertson says God gave him some election spoilers, so this is what he says. God told him. There's going to be a war. Ezekiel 38 is going to be the next thing down the line, then a time of peace, then maybe the end. But nobody knows the day or the hour when the Lord's going to come back. He said the angels don't know it and only the Father knows it. So I'm not saying this is the second coming, but I am saying there are things that people have thought would be during a millennial time with the coming of Jesus that are going to happen in our lifetime. The next thing is the election that's coming up in just a few weeks, at which time, according to what I believe the Lord told me, the president is going to be re-elected. I'm saying by all means, get out and vote for whoever you want to vote for. But by all means, let your voice be heard. But it's going to lead to civil unrest, a great proportion, then a war against Israel and so forth and so on. Oh, Pat, Pat, Pat. OK, I don't even know where to begin. Let's just take it from the top. First, he says there's going to be war, then a time of peace, then maybe the end. OK, so excluding the end, the end times, so pretty much like all of history. It's not like wars are some new phenomenon. They've been happening because humankind is a very flawed species and we haven't evolved to a point where we are not killing ourselves any longer. So like he says that as if, oh, well, this is just evidence that the end is near. There's always been wars. Like they could have said that the end times are near if you think that wars are evidence that Jesus is coming back like thousands of years ago, literally. But here's what he says and then immediately contradicts himself. That maybe laugh out loud. So he says nobody really knows when the end times will actually happen, not even the angels in heaven knows, but directly after saying that he goes on to make a prediction as if he knows when. Pat, what is wrong with you? It's like he he's talking and there's noise coming out of his mouth, but the words aren't connected to the thoughts in his head. And he's just like babbling incoherently. My dude is fading away. He also says, according to what I believe the Lord told me, the president is going to be reelected. But then he says, make sure to vote because this election definitely isn't a foregone conclusion. But wait, if if God literally is saying Trump's going to win, then why are you so unsure? Why are you making sure to persuade people to vote? Because regardless of how many people vote for Trump or not, isn't this election a foregone conclusion because God said it. God can make anything happen, right? Is he not omnipotent? So I mean, even if nobody voted for Donald Trump, if God wanted to, God can make Trump the president. Can he not? If God wanted to, I could chop off my arm and he can make it grow back immediately. Can he not? Is God not all powerful? OK, he then says, Trump's victory will lead to civil unrest of great proportion. I think it's going to happen if Trump loses more than anything, but that's possible. He then says, Trump's victory will lead to civil unrest of great proportion. And then he says the most puzzling thing ever. After Trump wins, quote, then a war against Israel and so forth and so on. Wait. So if Donald Trump wins, someone who you all claim is an ally to Israel, if he wins, then we're going to go to war with Israel. Like is it us that's going to war? Is somebody else in the Middle East going to go to war with Israel? If Trump is president, wouldn't, you know, under your belief, if you believe in Trump and what he stands for, wouldn't he protect Israel? I don't understand what you're saying. See, this is why you don't base your political ideology on biblical teachings, because if you try to make predictions or, you know, give a political analysis based on the Bible, you end up sounding like a stupid person. I mean, I don't mean to be blunt, but it's the truth. You're trying to, like, connect what the Bible says to the real world now, and you can see like you have to make a lot of logical leaps that you don't have any evidence for whatsoever. Like how do we go to war with Israel? Or how does Israel devolve into war and chaos? You have to explain these things. You can't just say things because the Bible gives you reason to believe something will happen or that, you know, because of what the Bible said, we're in like a certain era in time. Like you can't just say that. You have to supply us with evidence or even reasoning. Fuck, even cite a Bible quote. I mean, I guess you did cite one there, but like you're not making any sense because there has to be so many different things, a series of events that has to happen to lead to what you say will happen. And that's if Donald Trump even wins. Now, you say that God told you, but yet you seem unsure. But if Trump does win, then things are going to get more crazy. There's going to be more chaos and we're going to go to war with Israel. Pat, listen, this comes from a place of love. I take that back. It comes from a place of concern because you're a human being. You've got to wrap it up, buddy. You've got to retire.