 Hey guys, it's Monica. Thank you so much for coming back and spending some time with me. I'm actually doing a tag video This tag video was done by Susan little poet And I thought it was a really good thought-provoking tag especially since I've recently gone to my 50th high school reunion. So this tag is actually called the grown ass Woman tag. I hope I don't get censored from YouTube for using that But anyways, that's the name of the tag and if you are curious as to what this tag is all about Of course, you know the drill. Let's stay tuned Okay, so I was watching Susan's video and I'll link it below and she had done this tag and you know if you if you follow Susan's channel you know that she is just a Wonderful wonderful creative story teller. She can weave a story around any topic that will mesmerize you and She has visuals and she has music and just the way She talks and expresses herself. I think she she does a phenomenal job So I had to do this tag and one of the tag questions actually is is Who you know what woman has influenced you well, I would have to say Susan certainly has influenced me to do this tag So I hope you enjoy it and I am going to have to be looking down at my notes So that I get the tag questions correct. So I hope you can bear with me anyways, the first one is What would you tell your 20 year old self? So Interestingly enough, I really you know, I've done that I've answered that question. I did a video About my 50th high school reunion or 50 years since high school, you know, what have I learned? I did a video and I'll link that below as well about my you know 50 years out of high school and I would the same thing, you know, I can't change my answer to that even though that wasn't specifically the question But what would I tell my 20 year old self and for sure 100% it is plan for the future That's something I didn't do I think I mentioned that video that I lived in the moment often paycheck to paycheck I think a lot of us do that when we're young, especially when we're young and we're married and we have children and stuff like that So I didn't really plan for the future. I didn't really when I was young start thinking about being old and So if I could go back if I could knock on the door of my 20 year old self or my 18 year old self I would number one start Talking about Sunblock. I've mentioned this often in my videos It I think most of you understand the importance of protecting your skin Especially my channels, you know about anti-aging to a certain degree or aging gracefully None of that's gonna happen if you don't protect your skin and I so wish I could go back in time and just say hey Stop wearing Sunblock instead of the band of Salay and the iodine and the baking in the Sun I mean, I remember lying on reflective blankets right to get the Sun just to draw into me more So you pay the price for that as you as you age So I never thought of any of that and a thought of skincare and I thought of getting old and I thought of wrinkles And I certainly never thought to put pennies aside for the rainy day or for someday when I would be old and maybe Gosh, I might want to retire or something of that nature never gave any of that thought didn't really learn anything about that I would also go back in time and I would say, you know, don't be so sensitive Monica You know get a little tougher skin because I have always been a person. That's been super easy to be hurt very sensitive and probably lacking confidence because of that and I Think I would just educate myself a little bit that when people are mean, you know, people people are mean to you It's usually because they lack in themselves confidence so Sometimes people that are you know hurting themselves lash out I never understood that mentality of lashing out on others just because you're hurting But I know that that exists. So I think I would say Kind of, you know, really reverse your thought process when someone hurts you and pity them because they're really hurting They're hurting so bad that they have to reflect that pain onto someone else as much as they possibly can and just to not Just to not let it affect you Monica as it did and it did over the course of time Man, I mean, I wish I could change a lot of things in history bullying, you know stuff like that but Yeah, I'm people mean and I believe to you It's because that's the way they're feeling and they're hurting so they want someone else to hurt as well If that makes sense the second question I have is what was your favorite band from the 70s and the 80s and I You know, I was I graduated high school in 1972. We just had my 50th reunion I'm in a different person pictures as I talk. I just had my 50th reunion and You know, Jason to me I'm nervous about going and I said gosh, you know, it really wasn't because number one It was a very casual event and I really liked that idea and number two There was only maybe three people that I've seen and kept in touch with the rest of the folks from high school They're classmates, but I never really hung around 100% with them and certainly as an adult I never continued to do that. So My oldest friend that I had had since I was 12 Barbara she came to our house and Jay Jay went with us and he drove us to the reunion and so I've got a couple of pictures of Barbara and I at the reunion and and We it was so funny people were saying when they saw me and they didn't see Barbara They always just sidekick they they always kind of remembered us together I never kind of thought she was my sidekick, but some people did but they always kind of remembered us together and It's true because from you know, 12 years old to sophomore year when she dropped out basically of school We were always together. We had the same hairdos We held our bodies the same way. We posed the same way We smiled the same way and whenever she walked in and I saw her I cracked up because she put her hair up and I put my hair up and we didn't know right and was so funny how How similar we still are all these years later now I have seen her on an occasion, but I probably haven't seen her in in in person in a good Maybe 10 15 years now that I'm thinking but trapped her on Facebook and stuff like that So anyways the reunion was a blast. We had close to I think a hundred people at various points and times Show up that night and it was really awesome because it was casual. It was relaxed. The food was good We got to mingle it would crack jokes and they had a slideshow showing with the photos and then some of the old album photo high school albums out or yearbooks out I should say so it was really really awesome and You know, we were sitting there thinking and talking and talking about our styles The jeans were used to wear the ripped jeans the why bell bottom jeans and stuff like that And then we were talking about our music how our music was the greatest. So this question What is the favorite band from the 70s and 80s and I'm like home to reading this totally cracked up So I think when I think back on those days my hands on number one band would have been the doors I was a I was in love with Jim Morrison. I thought he was He was the hottest cutest sexiest Looking rock star ever and I was absolutely loved with Jim Morris the Morrison Though he was moody. He he was a deep soul and I just I loved his music. I loved everything So hands down number one would have been the doors think number two of the 70s would have to have been the Eagles I absolutely love the Eagles and then Fleetwood Mac. Oh my gosh Fleetwood Mac I I just love that band and I I really I really Got into that and I've watched a few of their revival shows and stuff like that and I just thought they were really awesome So definitely the doors The Eagles and Fleetwood Mac a lot more, but those would be same by top three Number three. What is the one person that influenced you influence you the most in your life? And why so influence is funny because it comes and goes If you would ask me this a couple of years ago, I might have said someone completely different, you know And it really all depends on your mode and where you are in your life so I Probably from I would have to be my parents and if I had to pick one over the other at this moment in my life I feel that I am most like My father because he's the one that has most influenced me my work ethic My personality the way I look at things. Yes, my father was extremely opinionated But he had a great way of listening to people and coming across and really thinking about things and when I was growing up he was extremely strict and I said oh my god, I'd never be that way, but My dad he's definitely influenced me in so many many ways and at 68 years old I think of my dad often he lived to be 90 and He He worked hard. He retired late. I'm still working. He retired late and He had dreams, you know in his dreams He made them come true from picking up his young family from Europe. You know it's one in Germany My brother he packed us up to unknown territory, right? We were immigrants You know legal immigrants into the United States and it was it was a hard Thing because my brother was young and I was young, right? So can you imagine picking up your family when you've got like, you know Someone that's four or someone that's six and wife and you're going to the strange country And you don't know how to speak the language So I guess I want to hear a lot of the immigrant stories and people trying to come into this country I I can resonate with them because I know You know, I know how bad it was of my parents so But yeah, so my dad definitely is the person that would I would say at this point in time has influenced me the most Overall in the pattern of my life. So my dad, what makes you angry? And What makes me really angry? There's lots of different things that can make me angry, but I choose to let go of my anger I don't want to hang on to anger. I Want to learn from it. I want to learn from the things that make me angry and and do better and not Be that same way. So if I think overall what makes me the angriest about people Is judgmental people? and and I know there are there are many people even in my real life that That I know I can peg into this corner very very judgmental They feel that their way their opinion is 100 correct and I have close friend Her her and her husband they they live I They live down south and we were probably on the opposite ends politically and they are very very opinionated and You know oftentimes and I love them daily. So even if people are opinionated I'm still going to love you but oftentimes it makes me angry when people are so opinionated that They can't see or even begin to empathize with another side of the story or even believe there could be another truth So I think because I'm also a certified mediator I learned to look at both sides over the course for my certification and being a mediator Means that you do have to walk in the middle, right? You do have to see both sides because you're usually trying to help people Come to a resolution and to do that you have to understand Both sides where they're coming from So judgmental people people that refuse to even entertain the thought that they could be wrong And they're their their opinion is the only way right? It's their way or the highway They don't comprehend that they are this gosh There's a 50% chance that they could actually be wrong in whatever opinion they're spouting So judgmental people I think really make me the angriest What truly makes you happy this is super easy I smile inside Every time I see that my kids are happy So when my kids are happy and it doesn't have to be material things It can just be little things they're doing an apple orchid flying a kite riding a bike The littlest things that they do that makes them happy Makes me happy. So when I'm seeing that my kids are happy and in a good place in life I smile both inside and outside So Have you had face lift botox fillers and what is your honest opinion of it? That's question number six So I have not Had anything done However, I do want to have some botox done to my 11s And um, I sleep with frownies every night my 11s bother me probably the most I would love to have a lift I would benefit from that But a partial lift or whatever, but that's not in the card to me I choose to not spend my money on that There's too many other things I want to see do experience than to have a lift But a botox I would like to have that done and I think that could be That could really make me happy now I am also aware of the fact that we sometimes see ourselves in a clouded mirror And you know what I see you might not see like I see my scar my husband doesn't see my scar So, you know because I had my most surgery right so I may be looking at myself in a clouded mirror And I think we all do that So I really think we have to before you make any decisions You have to really brush that mirror off clean it off and look at yourself truly Honestly way the pluses and minus, you know, will a face lift will this will it make you feel good? You know, and if you can afford it if you can save your money go for it I have no problem with that no problem at all For myself It's just I'd like to have my loved ones taken care of right now. So at 68 My skin is sagging. I have a ton of wrinkles But that's okay I've lived and I try to take really good skin good care of myself good kid. Good take good care of my skin I try really high So number seven fill in the blank. I wish I was more thought about this I wish I was more Confident I have gained confidence as I've gotten older But I have struggled with insecurity In lack of confidence that feeling of just not being good enough of not measuring up I struggle with that almost all my life to be honest with you. So I wish that a if I could you know, if I could change it I wish that I could zap my fingers and make myself into a confident person Because I know the more confident I feel the better I look actually So yeah confidence. I wish I was more confident You're all time can't live without beauty product I think I I don't think I could face the world without mascara Really Even if I'm not doing anything around the house, I have to put some mascara on if I'm just beating around the house I have to put my mascara on so mascara number one Number two moisturizer very dry skin. So a good moisturizer And I'm going through some of my products and you know, what I've been using because I want to formulate my thoughts And what do I really use every single day? You know, I've got a lot of stuff, right? So moisturizer and then on top of that, you know, sunblock Yeah, those are those are the three things. I know it was one But I just can't narrow it down because I need to have a moisturizer I need my mascara any mascara. I would take any mascara because I have my favorites And I need moisturizer and a new sunblock. So What are the three words you live by? Hmm So my three words that I live by I have always believed number one smile no matter what smile I walked around my reunion and I smiled the entire night. You know, people would say hi I smile. I just smiled the entire night And I think when you smile People feel more comfortable with you it resonates And it just sets that stage for feeling good when you're smiling The second one is just be accepting of people except what you have in life. Don't always Wish for something better or different except where you are make it the best possible day that you can have And and and just no matter what the third part of that is to love love yourself First because if you don't love yourself and it'd be really hard for you to love anyone else. So love yourself first And then once you have that self-love the rest of that love is just going to flow into you and resonate so My video is not like susan's She's awesome. I'm going to definitely link her video But yeah, this is the things that I've learned being a grown-ass woman 50 years out of high school Yeah, so anyways, thank you so much for watching and I hope to see you in my next video Please leave me a comment below. I would truly appreciate it. See you guys later. Bye. Bye