 We invite you to enjoy life, life with Luigi, a new comedy show created by Psy Howard and starring that celebrity actor, Mr. J Carol Nage with Alan Reed. Luigi Vasco left Italy to start his new life in America. He promised his mother that he would write her and tell her about his adventures. So now we look over Luigi's shoulder as he writes another letter to Mama Vasco in Italy. Dear little Mama Mia, it's now almost one year I'm in America and everything is a new and exciting. Like a traffic system they got here in Chicago. Streets is a full of people and cars. In our little town in Italy it's always so traffic. Streets is a full of people and the goats. I'm going to remember how every day a goat to run over somebody. Over here isn't much safer. I'm in Chicago one year and I'm going to never see anybody get a hit by a goat. Mama Mia, I explain to you traffic system in America is a very simple. Here they have lights. Red lights mean the cars are stopped but people are gone. Green light means the cars are gone. People are stopped. It's nice and simple. The trouble is Mama Mia in the middle they got a yellow light. I'm here one year still I don't know what is the meaning of yellow light. First I think is maybe to keep away mosquitoes. Then I'm going to stand on the corner and watch and watch and watch and watch and now I think I know yellow light is it to mix up everybody and to give a cup enough time to hand out the tickets. Mama Mia, sometimes when I think about this traffic system I think America is a very good but maybe it's safer for a man in Italy. Goats don't have offenders. This reminds me of our countryman Pascuali who has a spaghetti palace an exit door to my antique store and who bring me to this country. He is a still the one thing I should have married is a fat daughter Rosa. Pascuali he's got what they call here a single track of mine and Rosa she is the super chief. Like it this morning my door open and Luigi my friend hello Luigi hello hello. Hello Pascuali. Luigi my countryman all the night to long I'm not the sleeper because I'm a worry about you just look under my eyes what do you say your nose no no what do you say on the top of my nose more nose Luigi look under my eyes to see deeper darker cycles that's from a worry about you and you know why I'm a worry about you why Pascuali because the trouble with you is you never go out you in a store all the time all the day long you sit in a read you sit and you sit you use your head too much Pascuali reason I sit in a read is because I must study the English language what's it a good to study English when the only one you talk to is me and we talk Italian Luigi is the time you went out and made out of people why you shut yourself up you like in the closet you must go out and live in a laugh and a love how I do this to Pascuali take out of my daughter Rosa I'm a back in the closet again all right have it your way I'm not going to bother you about a marry in a Rosa I'm gonna come here to tell you to go out and have a good time that's a good for your health what do you think I should go Pascuali where all the tired of business and men are going to bed no they go to night the clubs they have a bed there Luigi is a night the club but not a take a shabazz but well I like it to go out and enjoy myself and I go to my first tonight the club and the dirty things American people do but is a known enjoyment to go out to with your daughter Rosa no enjoyment to go and out to with a row sir Luigi Bosco look at you five a foot to four curly hair two different a color eyes big is a little nose a crooked it a green a coat the belt in the back sneakers Pascuali nice to talk don't it change in my mind less than your shrimp your green horn you nobody's are gonna go out over to you but a big dope so why don't you go out of it my rosa but squalic Russia is a very nice a girl but they're not for me then who is it for you you've been America one a year you go out with a nobody why because the no American a girl to go out with you that's not true I never ask American a girl Luigi you couldn't get an American a girl even if you were born in American and a girl is a born in Italy I prove you wrong a Pascuali I get the American a girl all right to my little man I'm telling you what I do I show you Pascuali's a sport if you get American a girl to go out with you tonight I pay check at a night club but if you don't again a girl to go out with you tonight you take out a rosa is it not the fair Pascuali little mouse is a talk of big is a not so sure of himself I'm sure of myself a Pascuali I get American a girl and go out to tonight or my name is a not to Luigi Bosco what do you say to that goodbye Sam hello my teacher miss Baldy hello mr. Luigi what brings you to my classroom it's something I want to talk to you about but the first here's an apple what a lovely red apple miss Balding if I have a my way I bring you ten apples every day in a one a month or you'll have a your own a push cart mr. Luigi it's nice of you to think of me that way miss Balding I'm always to think about you I remember when I first started in your night to school a class somebody tells me how much little salary you make you know since to that day I'm a come up to school with the my own chalk Luigi that wasn't necessary and remember last the Christmas the whole class it chips in and abyssal fountain pen and you found the one extra present handkerchief that handkerchief with your out of a my own pocket I pay for it to myself mr. Luigi that's very touching you got to know idea how I feel about you when I stand up in a night school and I'm a recite the Jack and a jello one up at the hill then I'm saying it to myself Luigi when are you and a missus Balding gonna make it that trip had no idea you felt this way you got to know idea how I'm a feel remember when he shoots that the stupid a delicatessen of man he puts a tack on your chair and you sit on it believe him in miss Balding the painter went to write through my heart please miss Balding is there something I must know what is it with a nice American a girl like you go out with a poor Italian a fella like me course mr. Luigi I wouldn't be an American if Columbus hadn't discovered this place haha Pasquale is the wrong tonight do we go tonight the club oh I'm sorry mr. Luigi but I have another date for tonight oh you sure you tell the truth maybe you think I can't afford not at all that the fellow I'm going out with tonight's very poor he doesn't have a penny always another school teacher for as important for me I must to get American a girl for tonight why tonight because of Pasquale he's a say I know kind of get American a girl now mr. Luigi it's easy to know girls have you seen any American girls you like sure I see then it's very simple why don't you call one of them up how just use your phone book thank you my teacher miss Balding I do it miss Pauling it says the use of the phone book sounds funny but I use it Chicago telephone the directory classified let me say girls I look under a G got a bitch of disposal got him in the bags of gas that's a generator now I'm getting a close girdles glass my mummy or where's are the girls that's the funny is an old list of four girls must be all out of town a tray of the telephone a book here's a lot of names American the telephone a book I must have before a good American and I look or who the hand president is one sinner or a wit by genuine John Lou Krauss Meyer Smith that's a good I think I look up nice American name Mary Smith huh let me see Mary Smith Mary Smith Mary Smith Mary Smith Mary Smith Mary must be very popular girl to have a name in a so many times and the look good all the different addresses that she's a guy from a mere people can't get a place to live with this a girl that she's got a hundred apartment well I think I call her up I show for squally I find American a girl tonight hello Mary Smith this is a Luigi Bosco can you go out on a date with me tonight this is Mr. Smith what are you saying well I try not a girl I get a different American and then John's Betty John's that's a nice hello hello is it this a miss a Betty John's yeah this is a Luigi no not Luigi I'll cut it lowly want to get back I'm a never went over telephone isn't out the boss of Luigi Bosco you're not kidding no he's a funny thing in America nobody says a goodbye well it looks like a per squalys are going to win as a bet I'm going to try one more girl oh here's a nice name Susie Brown I tried ever stand for one please I'm not calling the number I'm calling Susie Brown ever stood a 41 phone the company has a two sizes toll operator in a small operator I guess a toll operator is a for long distance listen for Luigi Bosco maybe you got the medium-sized operator your number is busy I'm a mere operator are you busy what do you mean sir well I'm going to a night the club tonight and I'd like it to know if you like it to come with me company rules then you want to go well well that's gonna be hard wait I know how you recognize me easy I'm gonna carry a balloon now for the second act of Luigi Bosco's adventures in Chicago we turn to page two of his letter to his mother in Italy so now mama Mia I'm gonna have a tonight my first to date with American a girl if you see me now mama Mia you think maybe your boy Luigi is a crazy here it is a Sunday and I'm already take a bat after bat I put on a myself for summer special stuff I buy from a barber is a very expensive of course me ten cents I have a milk bottle now now you kind of smell me all the way to Italy also to make good impression I'm gonna dress up extra special you should see my suit now look so brand new after I'm a get through washing it so now so now I'm going to tell Pasquale all about the my date with American a girl hello Pasquale are you like this my eyes you say it's a Luigi but my nose I don't believe in my eyes stop making a fun of me Pasquale I'm all addressed up before the night the club Luigi my son I'm almost forgot are you all dressed up to take out of my Rosa no I'm going to take out a telephone operator where you get a her from a telephone a company must be a new kind of service Pasquale I'm not here to argue remember what do you promise me if I get a date to myself for you perfect for the night the club that's a matter you crazy you think I'm gonna lock at a bar and when somebody's are not the going out to with a my horse this afternoon you promise me then it was impossible for you to get a girl who was a possible of for me to keep a promise now is a possible of you to get a girl is impossible for me to keep a promise you mean you're not they're gonna pay my friend I give you my answer in a two words impossible Pasquale you think you kill my good time huh well you won't I'm gonna use of my own money I'm gonna take a girl tonight the club but we eat the we drink we dance so we go home in a taxi and then maybe even I buy her a flower oh how much money you got a little man a dollar and eighty dollar ready you're big a stupider you couldn't you dollar ready sure that's a fight a fight with all of that the money you're gonna have a wonderful night you're gonna go any place to eat all you want you sure Pasquale I prove you here look at my menu and the sandwich is 20 cents with a pickle at 20 cents with a potato chips at 20 cents with a bread at 25 cents that's why people eat during the daytime night time of food are sure to be cheaper sure that's right so maybe a sandwich is only 15 cents or you order a whole a dinner in my restaurant a 65 cents in a night the club is a night to rate she may be 50 cents you think you think I can also order the wine sure why and I charge a 50 the sense it may be the only charge a nickel then I have enough to left her for a taxi sure that's right taxi is only 20 cents a mile I go only half a mile is a 10 cents sure you see Luigi you take a girl out of the night the club like a shape I read you either you drink you take a taxi you still have a 40 cents left over what are you gonna do with it so much your body let me see I know if I like a girl tomorrow night I'll take her out again I love you you like a papa to me almost well there's a five minutes after eight the wonder where's the girl I'ma stand on here with my balloon maybe she's not to come oh there's a girl with the red the shoes a black a coat oh mr. my shank here is a me I beg your pardon I'm a fella make a date with you Luigi Bosco see the balloon oh brother no not as a brother it's a me Luigi well it was a very pleasant evening goodbye oh but the lady what about the date with a night club are we gonna take me nice a quiet the place she has a Paris oh you must be really loaded appearances is certainly deceitful well what if I got to lose okay let's go right this way I have a nice table for the hey ain't you Luigi Bosco remember me Tony Manelli and Napoli my father Fisherman Tony Manelli that's all right you little boy now you're big ahead away I'm happy to see you please Luigi no kiss here okay I understand you're going with the past qualities of daughter Rosa last the time I see Rosa she's a big juicer like elephant but this little girl is she look just like a chicken don't worry Rosa's still a bigger like elephant this chicken is a somebody else well have a good time Luigi afraid to down the front the special table well a good evening a miss at the night a fellow who Luigi you certainly know the right people well you see I know him a since I'm a baby my mother used to clean a fish for his father my father there was a man every morning winter summer snow rain he get up at five o'clock in the morning to wake up on my mother to go to work it's a bigger place no right this way sir your table may I have your hat it's a no use of your take no fit to you anyway oh you're so continental excuse me while I go powder my nose order for me here's your menu sir thank you mr. waiter I'm gonna order a bigger meal now let me see first do we start to with with the waiter I think it there's a mistake in your menu what's wrong it is say here Hammers-Hanowich at $2 and to the decimal appoint in the wrong of place shoulda be 20 cents no it's right all right olives olives are $1 must to be very expensive kids lemma chops of $4 mr. you prepare a something a special for me yes yes what would you like Hammers-Hanowich it for 20 cents sir you must be joking our cover charges for dollars then it take away the tablecloth well while you're thinking it over would you like to order a drink that's what I like good good what'll it be two glasses of water what can I do I'll bring it two glasses of water 80 cent that the first quality to do this on a main purpose now what am I going to do during myself immensely what did you order for us nothing oh you're so considerate you wouldn't order without me well I know just what I want steak I was afraid of that to let you go go we just came and they have such a good floor show Danny Thomas and the following your copy listen to Peggy listen to Peggy I must tell you the truth the reason we go is it because I am my friend I love Luigi I love I love I love I see you celebrate the well it's sit down and we join you but squally we're going up but squally don't push there to stay we all have a good time let's stay Luigi oh you're here alone the Pascuali now I'm the hair with my daughter Rosa the two of us we're three chairs come here say hello to Luigi hello Luigi hello say hello to the young lady how well anything else you want me to say Papa no shut up your face Luigi we're very happy to be your guest I'm glad somebody's a happy well are we going to eat I love the food Luigi you idiot no the food here is too rich I know just what do you mean well I'm on a waiter yes sir I put this down to shrimp of cockatales two vegetable a soup but to chef a salad a two tea bowl of steak a two mash of potatoes a two string of beans two bottles of beer to Boston the cream pie two cups of coffee and a two plates ice cream will that be all no I'll have to the best supper I'm I have rid of my life a steak of potatoes and pie ice cream but what could have come after such a supper the electric chair Luigi you're wonderful a host I'm so full I could bust when I hope for you and the Ross enjoy the meal very much Tony I'm sorry Luigi don't need it because the man who pays the check he should eat it's a good idea Pascuali you eat the you pay the check now Luigi I'm not gonna take this pleasure away from you please a forcing yourself a Pascuali that's a no use Tony give a Luigi to check Tony I'm ashamed but I must and Luigi sit down Pascuali you check I'm not gonna pay Luigi's he's gonna pay oh no you eat the you pay before I pay you wash it a dish no no first you pay what a cheap a frame of food all right I pay but I'm never come here again the food is a terrible arrow sir I'll have two of the same oh shut up well attorney thank you sit down sit down Luigi don't run away I'm gonna explain why I give Pascuali the check why well six years ago Pascuali bring me to Chicago he promised me big opportunity why do you think it's a big opportunity not to tell me you're right the road while a year he make my life a miserable trying to marry me to Rosa but tonight tonight I finally get even with him and thanks up to you Luigi my culture man you welcome a Tony but please and now we have to go no no no now you and your girlfriend to sit down and eat eat yes the food is on the house thanks a Tony but if it's the same it to you please put a food on the table all right what are you gonna have I'ma let the Peggy order Peggy you favor please steak potatoes pie ice cream coffee red butter okay and a Tony one more thing what's that no water well a good night to Peggy don't go Luigi is it this American accustomed standing in a hallway yeah but don't lean on the door bell if you wake up all the neighbors Peggy I'ma tell you something it's the first time tonight I'ma go out toward American a girl tell the truth you know have a good time huh I had a wonderful time you did it I don't believe you know what I like about you Luigi you like yes every other fellow I go out with all they can think of his wrestling you're different if you like I study wrestling I'm not doing anything Tuesday night maybe you're not doing anything Tuesday night so what means that we both are not doing anything a Tuesday night no it means we have a date oh good night good night I said good night that's so what I said good night good night and so mama Mia I'ma close on this letter to tell you everything come out to good on my first date with American a girl but the maybe you think I was act a little too fresh I let the girl a kiss me also mama Mia I must say I'm a very great to fall to Alexander Graham a baller for an event thing a telephone operator PS you're a son of Luigi the little immigrant this next week at this time over most of these stations when Luigi Vasco writes another letter to mama Vasco describing his adventures in America life with Luigi is a Psy Howard production and is written by high craft and Psy Howard and stars J Carol Nash as Luigi Vasco with Alan Reed as Pasquale music is directed by Lynn Murray Bob LeMond speaking this is CVS the Columbia Broadcasting System