 Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh I love the introduction, thank you for the warm salams If those who can hear me can make the way to the fire hall InshaAllah we're gonna start our discussion inshaAllah Good idea So as I'm looking at the crowd, we have a really good turnout And so first and foremost, I want to say the sisters are outnumbering the brothers So any brothers who might be in the local area, let's fill it up Alhamdulillah First of all, jazaf al khairan for having us here Again my name is brother Ali The first thing I want to do is to thank MCC for hosting this event Because this event touches just everyone in this room The topic, the topic actually touches everyone in this room And no one's called screen agers Tending toward the team agers But really we have, everyone in this room is affected Whether you're under the age of 13, whether you're over the age of 18 So again we have no cards going around So if you have any comments that you'd like to bring to the panel Then we'd be more than happy to answer any of those questions So again my name is brother Ali Disha I am actually a mental health therapist At one of our bay area high schools in Newark, Newark Memorial High School I am actually an independent therapist Hired by the high school to come into the high school To do individual and group therapy with the high school students there The end of the knowledge is to actually understand where you're getting this knowledge So you need to know a little bit about the panel who you're getting information from So I am going to briefly, inshallah, let you know my educational background And then I'm going to turn it over to sister Fasai And then she'll talk a little bit about herbs So my background, I am actually a master's in social work I actually did my undergrad at Sac State University And I did my undergrad work in social work The clinical track I took was clinical mental health My field work was done in non-profit sector in Sacramento The majority of my work started in alcohol and substance abuse And so when the film started to talk about addiction It resonated deeply with me Because what we see in addiction with computer screens and iPhones and gaming This is exactly what individuals who are going through narcotic alcohol addiction So my whole background, my undergraduate was in the field of alcohol and substance abuse When I did my graduate work, I did it at Cal State University Cal State East Bay Go Pioneers Alright, thank you I'm trying to lighten the mood Just trying to bring everyone up So my graduate study, I actually did that in social work as well So I'm a master's in social work Again, I took the clinical mental health track I did school-based mental health therapy So one of my field placements was Kidiyama Elementary School Where I was educated in plate therapy Where I worked with young children who have been traumatized, victimized And going through severe grief and loss And I was trained in plate therapy where I would help these young children Get through those traumatic times that they were facing in their lives My second year, I went to the high school And I wanted to stay in the school system Because I wanted to make a huge impact in the youth before they become adults The high school that I interned in was the high school I was currently employed in So the high school principal came to me and said The work that you're doing is so critical, can you be with us this whole time? And I said, absolutely So I have been now a high school therapist Independently contracted in the high school So I am dealing with teenagers who are going through anxiety, depression, grief and loss So I have heavy therapy work within the high school And a lot of it is around social media So I am very honored by this mission and the board of this mission to invite me here And hopefully be of some help as we talk about this subject So that is about me, that's who I am Now you know where you're getting some information from The last point before I turn it over to the system side I want to again thank MCC because this video We actually, we did, system side and I, we did a panel at MCA in the South Bay We did it out of this film I was told that this film is over $600 to rent So the message cares so much about this community That it would spend $600 and some change to rent this film And then send it back to the producers So I am just in awe struck that our communities are embracing this film Sharing this film and discussing this film And so again I just want to thank MCC for having me here I am now going to turn it over to my colleague, system side And she's a colleague and Insha Allah My background is not as elaborate as brother of these. I am By profession I used to teach now. I'm a homeschool mother at home, but I also do I'm a mental health advocate which I've been doing for several years my myself and my cousin dr. Who's a second and started a website called mental health for Muslims about Close to eight years ago and since then I've had a pump about the opportunity to speak to different communities throughout California and the country about various mental health issues and many times Many times those discussions have come back to this topic of social media and the concern that parents as well as teens have It's not a it's not a must your program One Thank you, so many times these discussions have you know centered around this issue of social media I can't count how many private conversations I've had here in this community in other communities here in the Bay Area and Southern California with parents especially many times Really really concerned parents like what do I do? Do I indulge my child has been asking me for months You know for a smartphone Dwight you let them on this particular app or should I say no You know what kind of boundaries should they create so there's a deep concern and it's absolutely You know, there's reasons what we know we watch this film But if you're paying attention at all what's happening in our world You know that there are absolute inherent dangers of social media and it's our responsibility as parents to look out for our teens So, you know these these grievances these concerns are definitely warranted and I've also heard from teens who are really worried or not worried more so frustrated I would say frustrated at the fact that they feel that their parents are being too strict and putting too many Limitations on them or and that there's a you know lack of trust in their relationship and they feel like you know They really have no options. There's a lot of tension in the home because of this topic So hearing from both perspectives has been really for me Eye-opening because I can see where both groups are coming from and that's why these types of events are so important Because what we're trying to do here is we're trying to encourage dialogue One of the things the generational gap and that I think you know happens naturally between parents and children is that Sometimes discussions stop, right? It's just my way. That's it, right? If you're a teen does that happen to you, right? When you bring up something and then the discussion sort of just ends Because parents obviously don't want to you know make you know do something or make the wrong sort of judgment call So it's just easier to say I said so that's it But that's obviously not going to fix the problem because if you know anything about this culture, you know that People find a way, right? So that's what's happening out when you have full stop Conversations that just don't go anywhere then teens will have access elsewhere And so that's where you see these problems now happening where they're getting You know access to really harmful material or just access to things that they shouldn't be getting through friends through school Through libraries through all these different places that now make things available. So that's not a healthy approach To just end the conversation. So we have to be doing exactly what we're doing right now Which is talking and that's why it's so important that we hear from you. Um, if you notice, there's a very sweet I don't know where she went one of the volunteers Marshala male bless her She's been walking around Collecting these note cards and the reason why this is so important is because we have a mixed audience here When it's just teens and it's just adults we can you know have really clear open Conversations but what happens naturally is that when we mix these groups up People kind of clam up and they don't feel comfortable talking about certain things because you don't get in trouble going into home Right, you don't want to say something you shouldn't say or admit something or whatever or bring up sort of you know But it can't work. So people just sort of tend to listen But really the purpose of our being here tonight is we want to hear from you So we've gathered a hundred a few different questions here but I really encourage you if you if you are a teen and you're struggling with this topic at home and You're seeing different you know you did you feel frustrated you feel that there's really no Respect maybe for your opinion or for your what you want Please open up to us because we won't you know, there's that anonymity that's afforded to you here with these note cards We don't know who you are, but we can address your concern here and similar with parents If you feel like this is a real issue in your home and it's causing a lot of problems with you and your child They're slipping away from you inshallah. We will do our best to help you today in this discussion. So Before we we sort of get started, you know and in presenting some of the thoughts that we had about the film We did want to get a chance to look at these But are there any is there anybody here in the audience right now who has something that they want to share a Reflection about the film or something I you know that you want to for us to address just if you didn't write a note card But you're willing to stand up and say something anybody Yeah, oh, we do have a hand. Yes, I where is that hand did it go down you change your mind All right. Yes, this is a lot in the back. Yes, I Will do my best to hear you just project your voice Yes, and we'll look through these in the meantime, but we want to get your get the dialogue going so we don't want to stop So Right Have you had a chance to talk to him about the film at all? Okay, good. Well, that's a great first step So I applaud you for coming here and I applaud him for coming here because mashallah that shows Willingness to at least you know open and be willing to hear you out I encourage you if I'm did I you did bring your child here This is a great, you know fertile ground to really start talking in a mature way You know in a way where you really respect your child sometimes what happens and it was actually brought up in the movie Too right that parents we get so authoritative because we're afraid right? We're afraid that our children are going to do something harmful that our tone becomes Authoritative right which is what I was hinting at before where it's just like nope. I that's enough I don't want you to do it anymore that end of subject, right? And what what that does is it undermines the intelligence, right of your child who is no longer your baby, right? They are growing and from the Islamic perspective The onset of puberty is when they really do become adults, right? And so obviously, you know there's adolescents and all the different physiological changes that go through that you know fully develops there They're mental capacities and all and what not but you still treat them with the same dignity and respect that you would Anybody else and so what I would encourage is to use this as a as a an opportunity to really encourage You know thoughtful dialogue, which is not just to say well now that you saw the movie You know you did you see did you see what I've been telling you? You know and kind of come with that, you know, well, I told you so kind of attitude but more like what did you think of the movie? What are your takeaways right when you as the parents? I think you know give that Encourage that dialogue from that respectful place your child is going to feel heard and listen to and Validated and then hopefully it's reciprocated right when it's your turn to discuss and you can say well You know the takeaways that I got from the movie or what was really concerning for me is this and this is my But they really now feel like they're talking to some it's a mutually You know respect respectful discussion and it's not that they're talking down to them or you're at them Right and so from that then it's a matter of well Let's find some compromise because I know now that you're 17 Masha'Allah, you know the internet probably better than I do and now how would you think we can find a compromise where both of us are? happy because as your parents I might my concerns are real right, I have reason to be worried and And I understand this is a new world that you're you know your world is different than my world and that technology is important to you And there's all these amazing opportunities with with on being online. I get that but how can we bridge this? You know and what what compromise can we find? What are you willing to do to work with me and see now what you're doing is you're again in You're encouraging your child to speak back to you You know in that respectful Compromising tone not in the pushing back rebellious tone right that will naturally You're gonna get when you're too authoritative and that's what happens whenever and I've seen this play out time and time again My parents think I'm gonna be tough I'm you know the child will either you know push back and equally be tough or will maybe You know play the part but then secretly this is where you know spiritually It's very dangerous because Shaitan is right there Shaitan loves nothing more than fitna He loves nothing more because discord so he'll inspire that child and justify all his feelings all your parents are so mean They're so strict. They don't even respect you look how they talk to you. They think you're nothing. They think you're dumb They don't you don't know anything you should prove them right you should go and you know Find these back channels and do this and this and this so Shaitan will get you know That's what he does he inspires them to justify those actions where they start doing things behind your back and at that point You know, that's it. You know the community communication is broken down in a relationship will eventually go and you know And really bad direction so I really encourage open dialogue respectful dialogue encouraging, you know your child to really Speak not just to listen the entire time but to speak and to hear them with true intention of like What you say matters to me. I'm not just here. I need to you know to Formulate my response to you because I already have my mindset made up Don't do that walk into that discussion with a really open mind and inshallah it'll be mirrored back to you Inshallah, just like a little bit of her for bringing that all that other also, please So I just wanted to that was a really good question One of the things that I find working with my students and my parents When I'm doing individual therapy, I do a lot of collaboration with parents and a lot of them issues are Exactly what the system mentioned. So one thing I would talk about is just healthy boundaries And what healthy bound what boundaries are just rules, right? And so whenever If you if you're if you have a teenager who's driving right and you invite them a car, you know Now we got to talk about healthy rules about driving the car, right? It's the same thing with a cell phone. It's anything with computer screens You buy them a computer and you give them a video game a lot of it, right? But we got to have some rules, right? So I talk a lot about healthy boundaries So I always talk about two types of boundaries, right? So we have our flexible boundary Which it starts with yes, but Okay, then we have a firm boundary, which is absolute. No, okay, so a firm boundary would be such Okay, I'm giving you an iPhone 8 great. I love that iPhone 8. This is amazing, right? But think of it is there's a firm boundary. You cannot have your iPhone in your bedroom Right? That's that's that's for about here you go. Here's your phone Congratulations, you've been asking for it but There's a firm boundary 8 o'clock you turn your phone in and there's no argument. There's no debate. There's no Discussion, right? That's that's what we call a firm boundary Flexible boundary would be you kind of earn it, right? You can move your parent to move their boundary in, right? So it would kind of look like You can have your phone at 6 o'clock and then all of a sudden, you know The child says well, what about till 6 30? You know that can I at least do it six there? So they're pushing against the boundary and you're like, okay, you've been really good about your phone Okay, let's push it to 6 30 on the weekdays But again, it's not no phone in the bedroom, right? So you move one boundary it now when you move a boundary And you have the right to change it back Okay, I didn't get the behavior. I was looking for or you know, maybe you slipped up somewhere else Now I want to move that boundary back. I'm gonna move that boundary. We're gonna put it back to 6 o'clock Okay, so that's so let again just talk because the film kind of discussed boundaries But we always throw boundaries out there, but we don't really define what boundaries are So as parents, I want you guys to have good healthy boundaries If you have good healthy boundaries in any relationship, you're gonna have a good healthy relationship So I'm hoping that that will help some a lot of our questions as I'm reading around cell phone usage And so I just want to read one question So why did you guys show this film? screen-agers When you guys are telling us and the children and adults that you should be using less technology It's a really good question because I like it. It's very blunt Technology is a tool. I have a phone right, but I have to be I use it as a tool Right sometimes I use it as entertainment, right? But I'm using it for a purpose and so we're not saying and I don't think scary screen-agers even said it We should get rid of technology right? We're immersed in it. It's very useful. It's very helpful But we have to find that balance Okay, so it's not getting rid of it completely But it's not being so immersed in it that it's it's it's lowering our grades It's it's affecting our relationships in negative ways and so we have to find that healthy balance And so that was just one of the questions and and whoever wrote that may a lot bless you for being so blunt so direct And I really I really wanted to make sure I read that question. So I'm also gonna read some of these questions They aren't much a lot. We got a good stack. You guys came through. Thank you And we're gonna try to get to as many as we can but there are a lot of common questions This one I really appreciate because it kind of talks about what I wanted to touch about today But someone asked why do you think people are still on their phones after the whole movie? Before coming here tonight, I actually was listening to a few different talks and then I I read some stuff that was really fascinating to me I read about a study that was done on boredom and The study was so fascinating because it said that in the study they found that One third or two-thirds of men and one fourth of women preferred pain Over being bored. So they were actually You know in the study. They were watching a film that was kind of boring and they were given this electric shocker system and You know two thirds of men and one of Fourth of women were shocking themselves throughout the movie because they were so bored But they actually preferred pain more and I think this is something that our teachers have talked about too that the problem with What what why social media especially and our phones? You know it's getting out of control is that we're basically avoiding You know being alone with ourselves, right? It's you can pretty much do anything and everything you can watch films You can listen to music you can it's just so distracting But what is it distracting us from is the question, right? What is it distracting us from it's distracting us from really just sitting with ourselves and Allowing ourselves to think to contemplate to reflect What what where do we even get time to do this anymore if you really think about the day-to-day Life that lives that most of us have from the time we wake up and to the time we sleep There's constant bombardment right of images sounds voices one of the things I don't have any of the moms are like me, but I'm with my kids come to that home, and I teach them But there's times when I really need to focus and so one of the things that really kind of drives me crazy is when they interrupt My focus right because I'm like writing or I'm working on something and then there's just constant just questions Mommy mommy mommy okay, that's mine mine mine And I always tell them like you're hurting like it hurts my brain because I I can't focus so but this This is really our reality all the time. We're constantly distracted and bombarded and so what the phones have done It's actually given us sort of this Customized way of just choosing what we want to distract ourselves with right we're not subject to Just sitting in a space and doing nothing We can actually do something that we enjoy and we like but really that from a spiritual perspective is this healthy Right from us from from knowing you know if you Inshallah just being Muslim and having heard I'm sure many Talks on the subject but the importance of thinking right how important is it for us to actually be thinking and Contemplating and remembering right remembering who remembering most of them remembering why we're here What we're supposed to be doing here our whole purpose so This is really a big problem And it's one of you know the things that I want to talk about which is looking at this issue Not just from a practical like oh we're here in 2018 Americans with teens you know parents kind of from that angle, but also from the angle from a spiritual perspective as Muslims How is this affecting at us? How is this affecting us from a spiritual perspective to be constantly on the phone? So for the teenagers out there It's one of the things that obviously your parents are concerned about is that this is so distracting That you're going to be seeing things and hearing things that are harmful for you spiritually Because everything and everything anything is available to you and as parents we know this because we were you know We grew up in this age of Knowing what it's like not to have social media and seeing What what life has turned you know into with social media So our concerns are real that there is that potential that this could really hurt your spiritual heart But even for us as adults, you know, we have to admit our own addictions, right? How many of us also have addictions to our phone? We have to be real and just you know really break it down and say as this question asked even after watching this movie Why is everybody still checking their phone every two seconds and checking their Facebook or their social media? What's going on? It's because again, this is now a spiritual problem We've talked about addictions talked about that, but we have to be willing to really look at it from that angle of how Is it affecting my spiritual heart? Am I even reading or and as much anymore? Am I doing it as much anymore as I used to maybe 10 15 years ago? if you've seen a dip in your own spiritual practice because You're constantly connected to this that's cause for concern, right? So inshallah this discussion affects all of us even though, you know Hopefully, you know the aim of some of the parents here is it wasn't just go get through to my teens But it's honestly for all of us to self-reflect myself included everything I had a friend who's only commit to just removing herself completely off of Social media for spiritual reasons and I really commended her for that because she recognized in herself That this was a real problem and she wanted to basically change that So how many of us are willing to do the same? How many of us are willing to cut ourselves off get off? What's that get off Facebook get off Instagram snapchat right raise your hand if you guys are on all of these Raise your hand if you're on Facebook. Let's just kind of get it to know each other. I'm on Facebook You don't mean you know my face How many of your Instagram? How many of you aren't snap? Be honest, how many of you snap today like you snap you snap stories you snap what you eat for lunch or coffee What you bought right? My shot line Okay, I mean you see it. We're all in it. We're all in this together So I hope that this whatever we share today really understand that it's for and I see how for every single one of us Even us up here to really look at how is this affecting us? Spiritually because we can talk about all the other stuff, but that is the biggest concern We should all have right if it's distracting us from all of us about that from contemplating Things like death. I mean how many of us think about death anymore really, right? How many of you think about death on a daily basis like seriously, my shalom That's very good now. Let's all of you and continue to to increase you But that these are important reflections and it's not to be morbid. No, this is from our from the sun now We remember death because it reminds us of our purpose but sometimes when you're so caught up in in You know looking at the world through this lens of you know Just life and there's so much vibrancy on social media. You can forget the death is imminent for all of us So I'm gonna do that for this question I thought was really relevant that even now after watching this and hearing information We still can't help ourselves. It's because we're avoiding that really important discussion with ourselves Which is being alone and being comfortable being alone. I Have a lot of so we have so long left But we have so many no cards from all of you and so what I'm trying to do is I we're not gonna be Because we're really asked to be done and wrap it up at 9 I sit on side and I actually talked before we started what we'd like to do is stay an extra half an hour privately I Can I'm gonna kind of set up over here if any of the youth I would really prefer the youth Because I want to give them a voice What I what I'd like to do is give anyone half an hour private, you know, just talk to me one-on-one No parents allowed, so don't bring your mom or no bring dad over just bring if you if you're a youth And you want to ask this question? I'll be over here. I think system aside is going to be here available for half an hour I'll lost words by time so we want to respect time And so we've been asked to kind of go up to 9 o'clock But one of the things that it's a it's a very prominent theme in the no cards is addiction I've seen the word throughout many of these no cards, so I just want to touch upon addiction Okay, so there's actually signs of addiction that I wrote and I'm actually put I put it on my cell phone That is so it's it's a tool I'm using right so Some of the signs of addiction that I've seen in in substance use and also to in in in screen addiction a sense of fatigue Migraines due to intense concentration or ice cream carpal tunnel Poor hygiene, right? You're not you're not bailing here You're not taking you're not brushing your teeth, right because you're always in the game, right or you're always on the screen pro-social I'm sorry, so These are just a couple that I want you guys to think about right so there's many others But also to a dip in your attitude, right? So when when dad says put your phone away, and then all of a sudden you bite back at dad say Well, I only wanted for a minute, right? You know your attitude changes So these are signs that you know there might be some addiction issues or so where my job is to give you something Right, I wouldn't be doing my job as a therapist if I can't give you something that you can't take out of here So one of the things I want you guys to think about is positive reinforcement and negative reinforcement Now when it comes to the youth I deal with high schoolers all the time So I'm always trying to motivate them or help parents motivate, you know, their students to do better Positive reinforcement what that means is I'm going to give you something if you do something or I'll give you something If you did something Negative reinforcement does not mean getting does not mean it means taking something if you do not do something, okay? Research found that negative reinforcement does work, but not as well as positive So I encourage and I do this with myself when I was in grad school I had so many papers to write I had so many presentations to do When you get into grad school or you go into your doctorate program There is intense things that you have to do is very timely oriented and there's a lot of pressure So you have to motivate yourself. So I actually had to do this myself I would say no screen time for myself unless I wrote two pages a day Because I've always writing papers papers papers, right? So I was not wanting to do that activity and so I was actually distracting myself Right, I was having more fun watching a movie or you know video game you or whatever So I actually had to reverse it. So I used positive free enforcement for myself. I Get a half an hour because I love PlayStation That's what I do, right? So I would give myself a half an hour PlayStation if I wrote two pages a day And then when I did that I was part of myself and I even told my wife I'm a grown man. I told my wife I said don't let me play unless I knock on my two pages And I knocked out my dissertation in a matter of a month and a half and my my peers within my my cohort They're shocked. They're like, how are you doing this? What are you doing? And I'm like, it's positive reinforcement Did you guys not learn how to behave or psychology one-on-one right? That was the class we all took together Positive reinforcement. So I'm giving this to you now think about it positive reinforcement. What can you do for yourself? What can you do for your kids? Give yourself something for doing something if that makes any sense at all So we're gonna be wrapping up real soon. I just want to personally I want to give the microphone over to sit outside for her Last comments. I just want to thank all of you for taking your time here. It is Friday night. It's 9 30 and You guys could be doing other things But you guys decided to be here tonight and talking about this especially are you I see so many shining faces And I just want to thank you for just having this conversation with us. So I might be half a son of a day come I'm going to be here to 9 39 45 10 o'clock if you need me. I'm here for you. So just come find me Okay, so I saw it Just like a lot good. Um, I did have a few questions here that were kind of all similar I'm gonna ask the closing remarks to but I wanted to get to these because they're clearly written from children But they're all the same. Why do you think parents tell us to just decrease screen time if they are on their screens? Just as much as us What if your parents are on their laptop 24 7 and they say they're just working is that okay? Your dad tells you to put your phone away But then they go and they are on the phone because that's what they you know What do you do about them? So, you know the kids are paying attention I think for the parents in the room as we all know kids model behavior that we show them So if you're going to say, you know, don't do this, but then you do the same thing It's obviously confusing so you have to be willing to open our discussion and for the children in the room who see this kind of behavior I'm it is important to know that obviously adults and children are different and our lives are different and many of the adults You know, especially living in this area and you know this time Do you have to work on their computers on their phones? So if they're working, it's not the same as playing video games, right? We're playing, you know words for friends or checking Facebook. So you kind of don't just, you know Make it all one thing like, you know, like it's all the same. You're just on your phone all the time but actually, you know consider the fact that they truly are doing something important and Maybe that's just a discussion that for all the families here that you have to have I've had that with my children My children are definitely pointed out to me like, mom, why are you on the phone? And then I explain to them I actually, and this is just advice as a parent. I am very open with my kids So I tell them everything. I show them like, listen, this is what mommy does. Mommy's a writer. I write I like to write a lot. So where do I write? I write on a computer Here's my files. You can look at my folder You can see and then they get so caught up with like all the words I've typed out, you know And they're like, wow, you've typed all those words. I'm like, yeah, it doesn't come easily, you know So they get it but when we just say I'm working, it's just, you know, it's kind of dismissive, right? And this is where we have to be more respectful of how we speak to our children It's so important that you open your conversations and are open to answering their questions with respect Especially when they're young. I think one of the tragic things that we do as parents is treat little children like they're New-senses all the time, you know, they just stop asking so many questions. What do you know? That's so rude and mean and it's not part of the character of the Muslim The Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam honored everybody from old to young. He would sit and talk to children He would, you know, come down to their level and speak to them eye to eye We're very, it's just a really unhealthy part of some of our cultures and the culture, the greater culture Just treat children that way. So if you do that, why are you surprised when they're teenagers and they're slamming doors in your faces, right? Or just shutting you out because it's you it's again what you teach them is going to be mirrored back to you So if you are respectful with your children from a young age, inshallah, they will respect your rules even They will follow the rules and they'll be mindful to not hurt you and not to disappoint you because you were so careful with them When they were children, so that's just a general mercy about really watching the way you explain the rules to your kids And just your general tone. Now as far as closing remarks as Brother Ali said, you know I would like to give you some takeaways. So what I mentioned before is from looking at this from a spiritual angle You know, there's three components of what I say of call digital literacy from an Islamic perspective And I encourage all of you to really like just start being more literate about what's going on in the world If you're not on social media for personal choices, I respect that but that doesn't mean that you can't know about what's going on on social media So there's you know difference. You don't necessarily have to participate, but you should absolutely know how they work You should know how Instagram works. You should know how snapchat works You should know how Facebook and Twitter and all these other ones that all these other apps that kids are into work Because when they come to ask you if you don't know then they're not gonna look at your opinion as having any credibility What do you know, right? But if you're like actually, yeah The reason why I don't want you to go on Instagram is FY after parents just in case you didn't know one of the apps That I think is probably the most dangerous out there is Instagram and snapchat Why is because not only do your kids have access to you know, they can be friend whoever But there's pages that are called like the explorer page, right? Which is which is you know the algorithms of these apps They basically look at the friends that your kids are connected with and look at what they're looking at And then they put together a screen full of images based on what everybody else is doing So it's not just your child's behavior. It's it that the impacts what comes on that page It's the behavior of everybody they're connected with so there can be very clearly Chronographic pictures on there or just content. That's really inappropriate that your child might have never even knew about But just one swipe on a different button will expose them to that stuff. So you have to know this though That's what I mean about digital to digital literacy knowing how apps work knowing how to navigate the web And just being knowing what the digital footprint is So when you're having discussions with your children about why it's so important that they control their behavior Do you understand you can explain to them that their future could be impacted by their behavior now? You know job prospects marriage prospects if you post a picture online when you're 15 It could come to haunt you later when you're 23 because someone sees that image and goes Oh, no, no, no, no, I can't marry into a family like that or I don't want someone working in my company Who is able to do that right these things happen to people all the time now So understanding what the digital footprint made means and explaining that to your child And then all the different dangers of scam artists and things like that So it's really important to know internet safety and security and then social media Mental health ramifications, which is what we talked about or what the documentary really talks about what's going on But the brain getting addicted to these things how it affects, you know Just the pleasure sentence that the frontal cortex adobe me all of that stuff That's affecting the brain of your young adolescent children the developing brains how it's impacting them and how it's going to Possibly, you know, leave them to addictive behaviors. It's so important that you know that and then the spiritual ramifications Which you talked about earlier how it affects your your spiritual Presence and prayer in other areas that where you should be really be able to focus if you have Your brains all over the place because you can't wait to get to your phone during prayer This is a clear problem But these are the types of conversations that you should talk about when you're bringing up your concerns to your children Because they matter and they're based on you know, there's studies. There's things that you can really Back up instead of just saying because I said so so it shall increase our literacy is really important We do have like I really said so many questions. Unfortunately, we weren't able to get all of them But if you do want to talk whether you're a teen or a parent, we're here inshallah for any Discussion so this is a lot does that come off again again for all to all of you for coming and staying this way May Allah bless all of you and protect our children inshallah and And this wonderful community