 In this video I would like to share five uncomfortable truths about parenting with you and the truth is if you don't have kids you might watch this video and think why did that lady have children and if you are a really good parent you might watch this video and think thank god I don't think this way about my children but I suspect that some parents and some people who hang out with kids might watch this video and be like secretly hashtag same secretly hashtag same live uncomfortable truths about parenting why did that lady have children here's an uncomfortable truth for you hanging out with babies is boring that's how I feel sometimes too Zai we don't have any of the same hobbies or pastimes or preferences when it comes to topics of conversation preferences when it comes to TV shows and not only do we have like zero overlap when it comes to what we like to do in our spare time there's also zero compromise in this relationship we do none of what I care about and everything of what they care about which is not really true because you don't want to do this looks like you want and I wonder if any other parent knows what I'm about to show you because this is the to me saving grace of pretending that's an incognito airport this is my pipeline to joy and entertainment while I do the things that keep me and usually when I have an airport in I'm listening to audible and let's talk about that for a second this video is sponsored by audible my number one used app because if I take my kids to the park I'm taking audible audible is the best place to listen to whatever you are interested in bestselling audiobooks in every genre exclusive audible originals popular podcast guided meditations and it is all in one convenient place as an audible member you can choose one title a month to keep for their entire catalog forever including the latest bestsellers and new releases plus members get access to a growing selection of included audiobooks audible originals and podcasts new members can try audible for free for 30 days all you got to do is visit audible.com slash shambhudi or text shambhudi to the phone number 500 500 that is audible.com slash shambhudi or text the word shambhudi number 500 500 to start your 30 day free trial watch to the end of this video for my recommendations on what you should do with your free trial here's an uncomfortable truth I know as parents we're supposed to be the pillar of security of sureness of confidence but the truth is if you have even the slightest bit of anxious attachment in you they will bring out your crazy your clingy your neediness your fear of abandonmentness because I know that there's this thing out there that says that children provide you with unconditional love but the real truth is there are a billion conditions in which govern how much these kids like or love me from minute to minute the last time I fed them the last time I said yes to them the last time I said no to them or just the look of my face on a particular day the way that my kids love me ebbs and flows constantly which can put you on an emotional roller coaster of neediness and the more embarrassing thing than that is not only do you desperately want your kids to like you something that you are auditioning for in every moment you also want other people to see that your kids like and love you and every time that you want to put on display how much your kids love you you want to show everybody that you are a parent who is valued and revered 80% of the time your kids are gonna embarrass you one of my greatest goals as a parent is to give my kids the space and the luxury of just being and that includes sometimes not being that excited or enchanted by me and this is a lot more difficult than I would like to admit that I brought kids on this earth not because I needed someone to love me but sometimes it would be genuinely nice if they did a little bit more more publicly more clearly more consistently all right it's about to get really real right now here's an uncomfortable truth when the babies are acting crazy and this right here this ain't crazy this is decimal five on the barometer of craziness that can possibly occur when they're really acting crazy it is so incredibly difficult not to pinch them I'm not proud of it but daily I give myself a TED talk on why violence will not solve my problems because pinching a crying freaking out baby will only make this baby cry and freak out some more but violence is bad isn't it they said to on tv not violence violins violins are bad piggybacking off that last one another uncomfortable truth is that hanging out with kids makes you hella childish and you get this like in the normal way you talk in a baby voice and you're really excited with the things that they're excited about and you play what they play and you do what they like but you also problem solve the way that they do you childishly mimic and mock them so that their tears which previously were frustrating to you now become kind of funny to you come on let's spin you let's spin you baby love so one of my daughters is very active and very aggressive and also very affectionate and very snuggly except she's both these things at the exact same time so cuddling with her is kind of like trying to hold onto a rotating bag of elbows and knees it's as much as you want to like enjoy the moment and be into it it's extremely extremely uncomfortable so this one time she's snuggling with me but like also elbowing me in the chin and like kicking me under the ribs and so i get so fed up that i start doing it back to her and on top of that in the most childish voice possible i'm like how do you like it how do you like it how do you like it when i do this honey you like it but the sad truth is she liked it a lot and the final uncomfortable obnoxious cliche truth about parenthood is that it is everything that you hear yes all the bad and all the complaints but mostly all of the incredible life changing i just have so many crazy moments where on a tuesday at 3 36 p.m i'm like this is the best moment of my life to all the parents out there or people who love children who have given me advice and reassurance thank you it has really just made all the difference for me it has been my beacon of hope it's been my lighthouse you have been there to assure me that i'm not alone i'm not abnormal and that i'm still capable of being a good mom even if i don't have the perfect feelings around motherhood all the time thank you so much for that it's been a game changer and i deeply love and i'm indebted to you for that okay if you have watched this far i suspect is because you were hoping that i would say the thing that you're thinking so why not just say it yourself in the comment section below tell me one of your uncomfortable truths when it comes to the children in your life also below as in in the info box below is where you can get a direct link to sign up for audible for free for 30 days and with the holidays coming up now is the perfect time to start listening you can get an audiobook to listen to over christmas plus you can listen to all the freebies from their plus catalog to get you ready for the new year here is what is in my library that's going to get me through this wonderful season what will you add to yours go to audible.com slash shambhudi or text the word shambhudi is the phone number 500 500 that's audible.com slash shambhudi or text the word shambhudi to the phone number 500 500 for 30 days free at audible thanks for watching