 Alright, so now that the last battle is approaching, I think it's time that we looked at some of the inner workings of the White Tower and see if we can find some ways to improve upon it, which is why I've brought in a consultant. Hello, I'm Ted. I've been brought here to help iron over some of the rough edges in your organization. You were highly recommended, so I hope you can help us save the world. Uh, right. Now, I don't want to come here and act like I'm your boss right off the gate, but I have noticed some problems with the way that this organization is run, uh, particularly with the way some of the Ajahs operate. Now, uh, let's start with the Reds. How dare you speak to me that way? Okay, first of all, rude. Second of all, your entire reason for existing is to try and wipe out all the men who can channel. That kind of makes sense, since they'll go mad and destroy everything if you leave them alone. So what's the problem? How do you check to see if the men you capture aren't the Dragon Reborn? Pardon? How do you know you aren't dooming the world when you cut them off from the One Power? I don't have to answer you. The mishandry isn't getting you anywhere either, especially since it prevents you from bonding any warders, which leaves you vulnerable. We don't need your help, breeder. And how about the way you're slowly culling the ability to channel from humanity because you're killing off all the people who carry the gene for it? I don't know what those words mean. Well, that's good. Now we know what to work on. Uh, so next up, the Grey Ajah. Oh, there's no need to talk to us. We're negotiators. We focus on politics mostly, you know, making sure the world is peaceful. We do a lot of introspection already. Okay, that was my next point, actually. There are a lot of wars going on right now. Andor, Karrion, Tyr, Illion, Eridomon. The list just goes on. There are civil wars and wars between countries, both of which are left entire kingdoms on the verge of collapse. Aren't you supposed to stop this sort of thing? Look, no one can make a three-pointer every time. Sometimes wars start despite our best efforts. And the fact that it happened everywhere all at once? Pure coincidence. Okay, uh, you know what? We will get back to you later. Uh, the yellows. Good thing all we do is heal people. Yeah, that sounds great. Uh, quick question. Who do you heal? Anyone who comes to tarvel on, of course. Oh, really? Anyone deathly ill enough to warrant coming here only has to cross an entire continent so that they can come here and beg for help? That's so generous. Well, what would you have us do? Why not set up a few hospitals in major cities? Make it so that people who can't travel that far can still come and get care. Maybe you could even have a few sisters travel around rural areas so that they can help heal people. It would be useful during times where a lot of people are being wounded, like during times of war, which we have several of right now. Hey, if they don't want to drop everything and drag their cancer-ridden bodies across mountain ranges for three months, then they must not really be that sick. It's not about the destination so much as the journey. Okay, okay, so, um, the greens. Yes? You're the battle, Ajah, correct? Of course. Yet you're all hanging out down here in the White Tower instead of helping to fight Shadow Spawn up in the Borderlands. Why? Well, you see, they have it under control. Wouldn't they have it more under control if you helped? And wouldn't that provide you and your sisters with a valuable combat experience? It's cold up there, okay? It's cold down here. The Dark One's influence has us trapped in a never-ending winter, remember? Look, if any Trollics just happened across my path, I'll blow them away. Does that sound fair? No, not at all, but let's move on to the Browns. We specialize in keeping knowledge, and we do a great job of it, too. Well, you definitely suck less than all the others. You have turned the White Tower's library into the world's greatest depository of knowledge. Do you have any other libraries, though? Well, no. We thought it would be best to put all of our eggs into a single basket. What's the worst that could happen? We'll get back to that. What do you do with all your knowledge? We preserve it. Yeah, but do you find any practical uses for it? Do you help engineers bring clean water to cities? Do you teach farmers new practices that could produce more food? How about developing new technologies that could save labor? Are you serious? Learning is a zero-sum game, okay? There's nothing new to find out there. And if someone else finds it, then that means we lose it. That's how this works. Okay, you know what? We will circle back to your hoarding habits later. Next up are the Whites. Yes? Your entire order revolves around being logical and emotionless. Yes? What does that even mean? It means we are logical and serene. Yes, but what do you do? What's your role as a servant of all? We are logical. Everybody thinks that they're being logical. There is an entire philosophical school of study built around logic. It's a surprisingly difficult thing to pin down. It's not a solid characteristic that people will consciously follow or choose not to follow. We consciously choose to be logical at all times. Was your mission statement written by a YouTube atheist from 2013? I just saw the name on a sign-up sheet and thought it sounded cool. Coincidentally, that's how I found this job. Now, the last a-ja are the blues, who apparently focus on righteousness and justice. That's correct? Well, that's similar to logic only worse. How do you define justice? Every sister chooses a cause for herself. Then how do you know they're all just? What if two different blue sisters have mutually exclusive ideas on what constitutes justice? We're Aes Sedai. We're never wrong. And therein lies the problem. None of you ever stop to think that somebody else may have a point. You're a foreign, distant power that has the ability to control minds and summon earthquakes. You have to put in some work to make people trust you. It doesn't matter if people trust us. When the last battle comes, they'll see the wisdom of our ways and rally behind us. There is an entire army of religious zealots out there that sees you as servants of evil who all need to be killed. A few white cloaks can't hurt us. They took over an entire country and now they have armed bans roaming the countryside evangelizing to new recruits. We get new recruits, too. Sometimes. You're a bunch of aristocrats by another name. I resent that. Our name means servant of- Oh, come off it. Charvalon is an independent city-state run by a minority of citizens who can only achieve their status through birth. A normal person can't become an Aes Sedai unless they're born able to channel. And your lavish lifestyles are funded by tax revenue from your subjects. That is textbook aristocracy. No, we're- Um... Aristocrats are servants, too, you know. Oh, fuck this. I'm becoming a dragon sworn. At least they offer a pension. I think that went well.