 I'm olive soap your beauty hope and luster cream shampoo for soft glamorous dream girl hair Bring you our miss Brooks starring Eve Arden Like many of her colleagues in the teaching profession our miss Brooks Madison High School's English teacher Watched the year 1948 come to an end with mixed emotions As she puts it although the year didn't start off brilliantly or develop too sensationally It certainly wound up in a blaze of nothing Of course, I did enjoy my two weeks vacation In fact, I spent most of the money. I was going to borrow in the next three months The afternoon of New Year's Eve Friday December 31st for those that still can't remember I was chatting with my landlady. Mrs. Davis. Well, Connie I guess you've got big plans for this evening. Frankly. I haven't got any plans at all Mrs. Davis Of course, I do have a date with the bashful biologist. Mr. Boynton What are you going to do Connie? Probably the same thing we did last year pull our money and go to hip-sings for dinner Fine way to spend New Year's Eve to Americans go to a Chinese restaurant Dutch What are you going to do Mrs. Davis? Oh, I'm going to visit my sister Angela. She's so absent-minded poor thing She'll probably be surprised to see me Although it was only last week that she invited me over. What time do you think you'll be leaving Mrs. Davis? leaving But where? For your sisters For my sister's what? For your sister's house. Oh, I'm glad you reminded me Connie. I've been making I've been making up my New Year's resolutions, and that's the first thing on the list I've resolved to correct Angela's absent-mindedness Angela's absent-minded What else is on the list? What list? Maybe I'd better talk to Minerva the cat for a while. We were talking about New Year's resolutions Mrs. Davis Oh, yes, I'm sorry. I wasn't paying attention Connie. Tell me the rest of your resolutions Well, first of all I've resolved not to what resolution We were speaking of yours Mrs. Davis and before you say my what I'd like to ask you again the question I asked when we were both younger Namely when are you going over to your sister's house? Maybe you better not go out tonight Connie you sound very strange It's just the way you're listening Or are you Mrs. Davis? Of course I'm Mrs. Davis Now you lie down and let me fix you some hot tea. I don't want any hot tea. I just want an answer Thanks, Minerva Now about this evening, Mrs. Davis. Hello, Minerva. Want some milk, dear? I'll get you some in a minute. You were saying Mrs. Brooks this evening your sister's house Yes, I'm going over there tonight. I know Mrs. Davis Right away, Minerva. What time Mrs. Davis? It's a quarter of four now Get away from those curtains Minerva, I'll fetch your salsa right away. Keep on my honor. Will you Angela? I'll be glad to Connie Come on just hop into my lap, Mrs. Davis There's a good dog. This is getting contagious Oh Coming excuse me, Minerva. Why it's Monsieur Manet. Come in. Merci mademoiselle. Thank you. It's nice you remember me Remember you. I'm Monsieur Manet your Madison High's favorite French teacher for that miss Brooks permit me to kiss your hand Let's not give the other hand the complex Certainly not I trust that I'm not arrived at how you say inopportunity time Oh No, this is very opportunity time. Won't you sit down, Monsieur Manet? Oh, thank you miss Brooks But now that I'm teaching in America. I would appreciate it if you would call me in America. All right. What's your number? No, no, no, I mean call me Mr. Monet instead of Monsieur. Oh, certainly Oh, I didn't know anyone had come in this is Mr. Manet, Mrs. Davis our new French teacher at Madison How do you do mr. Monet? How do you do mrs. Davis? I kiss your hand madame. I'll hold your saucer madame Lovely lady with a lovely hand Mr. Monet came over to see you Connie. I'm sure he doesn't want to talk to me there But I'll just take her into the kitchen come along dear. There's a good kitty come drink your milk out here So nice to admit you mr. Monet or likewise. I'm sure she's very nice your mrs. Davis But why she run away so fast in the words of some of my pupils why she took some powder and put it on the lamb Oh, you mean she took a powder or took it on the lamb may we she flew out of here like a bat out of Faster than your teaching Now mrs. Davis was just being tactful I guess she thought you wanted to be alone with me alone with you, but why miss Brooks? I'm a married man. Oh, I know but mrs. Davis doesn't know about your wife mr. Monet. Oh, oh miss Brooks I I don't know what plans you have made for New Year's Eve But my wife Elaine and I would be very flattery if you would join us. Well, thanks mr. Monet I'm flattery that you should ask me But as far as I know mr. Boyden is taking me out tonight. Oh, then you both must come you see This is not an ordinary party miss Brooks. Although we're all going to wear evening clothes and try to have the best possible time Elaine and I we realize that among school teachers. They are very few. How do you call it? malted millionaires Some of us are too thick to drink with a straw What you're trying to tell me is that the evening won't cost much money. Is that right? Oh, it will cost you no money miss Brooks, but there is an admission charge kind of blood No, no, no just some old clothes you see I am in charge of a committee to send clothing to the poor people in France Any sort of clothes would do miss Brooks anything that is made of cloth. Why that sounds like a wonderful idea, mr. Monet, I'll be delighted to come and mr. Boynton. Do you speak for him as well? Mr. Boynton has been spoken for many times He doesn't answer You mean about tonight. Yes, mr. Monet. I feel sure I can speak for mr. Boynton. Oh fine I'll be leaving them. I'll walk you to the door mr. Monet. Oh my address is a 9066 charm drive try to get there before 10, and I'm sure that as my students say we will have a ball Yes, until tonight then miss Brooks stay in the groove. Oh natch mr. Monet natch and mr. Monet. Yes Don't take any wooden Franks Our miss Brooks starring Eve Arden will return in just a moment, but first here is Vern Smith Ladies regardless of age skin type or previous beauty care Doctors prove you too may win a lovelier complexion with palm olive soap But to win this lovelier complexion the kind men admire and women envy you must stop improper cleansing Instead use palm olive soap the way doctors advised remember 36 doctors leading skin specialists advised 185 women many with complexion problems to use palm olive this way some have dry skin some oily some course looking Using palm olive soap alone two out of three one lovelier complexions Now here's what the doctors advised wash your face with palm olive soap Massaging for one minute with palm olive soft lather this cleansing massage brings your skin palm olive's full beautifying effect Rinse do this three times a day for 14 days It's that simple, but doctors have proved this way using nothing, but palm olive really works So forget other beauty care use palm olive soap alone for a lovelier complexion For loveliness all over use big thrifty bath size palm olive in your tub or shower After mr. Monet left I tried to get mr. Boynton on the phone to tell him about the invitation But ours is a party line a four-party line to be exact and every time I picked up the receiver It was in use always careful not to lose my temper I sat by the phone and drummed lightly on the top of the table until my five fingernails were impaled in the mahogany Then I tried it once more Coincidence Lucy I smell my drapes burning in the living room Hang up now. I'll call you back so much for Emma and Lucy. I'll try it again. Oh It worked at least I can dial now. I hope Lucy doesn't think Emma was kidding her Daisy and Fred isn't here. Will you please get off the line? Happens to be a party line and I happen to be the party using it at the moment It doesn't matter I only say Frank Frank, are you still there? I had it come up your bottle is falling out of the chandelier Start When a body meets a body, he's had too much rye. Hello, mr. Boynton. This is miss Brooks I assume we still have a date for tonight. Yes December 31st 31st, eh? Yes, you know the day we celebrate the appearance of the first enchilada north of Laredo, Texas We'll think of something you mad impetuous boy As a matter of fact, that's why I called mr. Manay and his wife are having a little impromptu party at their house And they've invited us What kind of party well you have to have some old clothes and then you Know this is not Emma. This is your friendly cooperative party line neighbor. Oh, I'm talking to non-stop Nellie the human dial tone Will you please stop this filibuster and get off the line? Yes, mr. Boynton as I started to tell you although it's a formal party We're supposed to have some piece of apparel that we can That is not friend no it isn't When I talk to strangers wonder if you'd give me a hand I've been invited to a formal party tonight And I just don't know what to wear. Well, what if you got honey? Well, nothing that is nothing but an old evening down. I've had for five years Well, come on into your room Connie and we'll look it over here. We are won't take long to find in my closet Well, let's see. Here's a skirt and blouse the suit. I got two years ago. Here's one of the dresses I wear to school. Here's the other one. Oh There we are my pride and joy why that's real pretty Connie and look at the fringe Silly malls. They left the best part While I'm in here, I better find something to donate as well donate. Yes, the price of admission to the party is some old clothing I know I've got some because I've been wearing it Oh dear, I forgot to tell you Connie But just last week when the Goodwill truck came around they pick up all clothes, do you know? I gave away everything of mine. I could possibly spare. Well, that's all right, mrs. Davis You're not going to the party. I know but I also gave away a big bundle of your stuff You had it lying in the closet and miss Davis that was for the cleaners I had some of my newest clothes in that bundle 1945 stuff I'm sorry dear, maybe you can borrow some old clothes to give well, I guess I'll have to I know I'll go over to the Conklin's he's got one suit. I know could use an ocean voyage Are your folks at home mother's out shopping, but daddy's upstairs taking a nap come on into the living room Won't you? Walter Denton and I were just playing pass it Look who's here, Walter? Well, if it isn't my favorite English teacher Sit down miss Brooks Harriet and I were just playing pass it. So she told me what's pass it? Well, it's a game we read about lots of high school kids play it All you do is take a piece of Kleenex and hold it to your nose by sniffing and then with both hands behind your back You pass it down a long line of kids by sniffing it away from your neighbor Oh Sounds fascinating, but where's the long line of kids? Oh, it's just as much fun with the two of us more Saves wear and tear on the Kleenex too Harriet and I go steady that's why I'm here But what brings you to the dread sanctum sanctorum of your school principal during a holiday? Please Walter you make daddy sound like an ogre Yes, Walter just because mr. Conklin is my superior at school is no reason for me to live in dread of him Now is a good time to tell him you're here miss Brooks You see he's going to a big party tonight wants to get some rest well Then maybe you kids can help me out I've just got to get some old clothes somewhere right away. Why miss Brooks the ones you've got on look fine I think but I'm talking about clothes. I can donate golly miss Brooks mother just gave away every stitch We could possibly spare to the Salvation Army Wait a minute daddy's new tuxedo is being delivered today, and he's got an old suit of evening clothes That I'm sure mother would love to see given away say no more Harriet Do you think you can get it without waking your father sure it's right here in the hall closet? Here it is miss Brooks This is the suit daddy wore when he first became a principal. Let me look at that Hmm. I bet he was a sensation in these tales what there are three of them Oh, that's just where one of them is torn you can patch that up in a jiffy. Thanks very much Harriet. It's cloth anyway Well, I'll be getting a long home now. Mr. Boynton's picking me up soon, and I've got to see if my evening gown still fits me I've had it for over five years. I think that's nice miss Brooks. What's nice Walter? How you and your evening gown have grown old together Not that you're falling apart at the seams or anything I mean well to me You're still all wool in a yard wide You have just failed in English for 1949 would you care to try for 50? Hello, hello, mr. Conklin. Yes, who's this? This is Kane from Kane's classy cut clothes with four Ks Oh, yes, where's my tuxedo Kane? You promised it to me by five o'clock. It's ten of now Oh, that's what I'm calling about mr. Conklin. I can't get the suit to you by five o'clock. You can't well Then when will it get here next Tuesday? Next Tuesday, but I've got a very important party to attend tonight But isn't there something you can do somebody who can fix this Even if I gave the suit to another shot to be finished, it wouldn't do any good. Well, how could you why did you win did this? Control I've had a great disappointment my tuxedo. Hello, Denton And pass it want to sniff this Kleenex off my nose onto your nose. I can think of nothing more loathsome to do Harriet do you know where your mother put my old suit of evening clothes your old suit daddy? Yes Yes, I've got to wear it tonight. Oh, but that old evening suit isn't any good, mr. Conklin It would make you look like a like a head waiter in a cabaret a head waiter That happens to be one of the finest I Gave it to miss Brooks just a little while ago She and mr. Boynton are going to a party where you have to bring some old clothes to get in what? That does it not only do my teachers openly flaunt my wishes about fraternizing, but they take my Children, you know what I'm going to do. No, we don't but I know one thing if I was miss Brooks I'd hop in bed and pull the covers up over my head Well look on me mrs. Davis lovely Connie and fringe is more popular than ever It's amazing what a tuck here in the stitch there will do About what time did mr. Boynton say he'd be over about this time mrs. Davis. I'll get it good evening mr. Boynton Won't you come in? Oh, thanks, miss Brooks Say that's an interesting overcoat you have on Raccoon isn't it? It's a relic of my college days you mind if I hang it up here. It's pretty warm go right ahead mr. Boynton Then come on into the living room. All right Oh, that's better Well, it's Brooks. You certainly look lovely tonight. Thanks, mr. Boynton. You look Mr. Boynton, I told you we were invited to a New Year's Eve party didn't I well. Yes, you did Do you always go to a formal party in white flannels with a blazer and a beanie? Oh Well, but you said you had to have some old clothes to get in some odd piece of wearing apparel is what you told me Oh, great. I hope your sneakers are vulcanized I don't understand miss Brooks just what kind of a party is this it's a formal party mr. Boynton But the price of admission is some old clothes to be shipped abroad. Oh, well, I don't know I don't usually go to parties on New Year's Eve. You don't well How do you like to spend the evening mr. Boynton? Well, I usually have an early dinner then catch the first show at the movies and hit the sack about 10 30 What does your doctor say about such carrying on? Look mr. Boynton, I've already accepted for both of us and wait a minute I've got a dress suit that might fit you then we can bring the stuff you've got on as our admission Just go into my room mr. Boynton and take off those clothes. Oh miss Brooks Find a suit of evening clothes right on the bed. Please slip them on. Mrs. Davis Have you finished sewing mr. Conklin's tail together? Just finishing now Connie Here it is as good as new. It would make any head waiter proud. Oh, hello, mr. Boynton My father nice beanie three propellers I wish you'd tell me what this is all about Mrs. Davis Well, you're going to an ideal source for information just take this suit and put it on mr. Boynton, please Well, all right miss Brooks, but this is all highly irregular now. Mrs. Davis. Let's go into your room I want you to fix my hair in the back. I'm wearing it up. You know, and it's not quite high enough My goodness Connie, how high do you want it high enough so that I'll have to stand on a chair to pull it down Well, it doesn't fit too badly I get miss Brooks. I've got the suit on that's fine I'll just be a few minutes. All right. Oh, well, it's mr. Conklin. Good evening, sir Good evening. I'd like a table down front, but not too near the drum. Oh, it's you boy Yes, sir. Won't you come in? No, I won't come in Boynton. How did you when do you use Eve? I'd swear that mr. Conklin had come by. Oh, it is you mr. Conklin miss Brooks I demand the return of my evening clothes at once your evening clothes I cannot tell a lie mr. Boynton. Take it off. Take it off. Take it off Well, don't just stand there mr. Conklin applaud a little Get ready everyone. It's 12 o'clock turn up the radio Well, miss Brooks nice party, no But it's midnight now The band is playing au lang syne and everyone should be kissing someone. Where's your mr. Boynton? Oh, haven't you heard mr. Manay? He hit the sack at 10 30 Eve Arden is our miss Brooks returns in just a moment, but first Tonight show him how much lovelier your hair can look after a luster cream shampoo Only luster cream brings you k-doomats magic formula blend of secret ingredients plus gentle lanolin Gives loveliness lather even in hardest water Glamorizes your hair as you wash it Luster cream not a soap not a liquid but a dainty cream shampoo Leaves hair fragrantly clean free of loose dandruff Blistening with sheen soft manageable gives new beauty to all hairdos or permanence Four ounce jar one dollar smaller sizes either tubes or jars Tonight try luster cream shampoo and be a dream girl dream Beautiful luster cream You owe your crowning glory to A luster cream shampoo And now once again here is our miss Brooks Well, mr. Boynton didn't show me such an exciting new year's eve But we had another date the next day today after spending the afternoon at the zoo We came back to my house Do you mind if I turn on the radio mr. Boynton? Well not at all miss Brooks, but I'm afraid I can't stay to listen to it Why not? Well actually I didn't get into bed our new year's eve until 10 minutes of 11 I've got to catch up on my sleep And so as Philip Boynton faded slowly into the west I bade him farewell in true Zulu fashion by saying Tunga Lunga Bimba Loctaw Which means how can you leave now jack benny has switched over to cbx Next week tune in to another our miss Brooks show brought to you by palm ale soap Your beauty hope and luster cream shampoo for soft glamorous dream girl hair Our miss Brooks starring eve arden is produced by larry burns written and directed by al-lois with music by wilbur hatch Men do you shave with a lather or brushless shave cream palm ale shaving cream comes both ways And whichever way you prefer to shave you will find that using either palm ale brushless or palm ale lather shaving cream Can bring you more comfortable actually smoother shaves. Here's the proof 2548 men tried the new palm ale way to shave described on the tube and no matter how they had shaved before Three out of every four got more comfortable actually smoother shaves Get palm ale brushless or palm ale lather shaving cream today For mystery liberally sprinkled with laughs listen to mr. And mrs. North the exciting fun packed adventures of an amateur detective and his beautiful wife Tune in tuesday evenings over most of these same stations and be with us again next week at this same time For another comedy episode of our miss Brooks stay tuned now for lumb and abner bob luman speaking This is cbs the Columbia broadcasting system