 Well, we've got it as cold as a refrigerator in here, right? Yesterday at this time it was starting to smell like the boys locker room. All right, everyone needs a handout and something to write with. All right, I'm gonna give this book away, Journey to Authenticity. We're gonna do, we're not gonna do this random whoever puts their hand up thing. If you are 44 years old and willing to admit it, I want to give this book to you. Now, if there's more than one 44 year old in this room, we're gonna, okay, you're 44 and willing to admit it, you're 44 and willing to admit it, and you are too. Now, of these three people, what, whose birthday is the closest? If you're 44 years old, whose birthday is the closest to today's date? You're wrong, you're disqualified. See, the mind is the first to go. October? August. August? Okay, help me. Who's closer? Why did I give a book to a 44 year old? Did you know that statistically, 44 is the saddest year of your life? It is. You have something to look forward to? Wow, this is really fantastic. Why are all you guys here? Did someone tell you to come here? Were you referred here? Did someone say, that's a pretty good one? Okay, good. My name is Sonny Mazar, and my wife Becky and I have been in ministry for over 30 years in local church ministry. We're now helping the radiant network, helping with pastoral care. Our heart is to serve those who serve and minister to those who minister and equip those who equip. And one of the ways we put it is we help pastors do ministry without losing their own soul. And so I've been loving, as I know you have been loving, some of the things we've been learning in this seminar, in this conference. Hasn't it been great? Yes. It's been really good. And so we've been married 32 years and we have four children. This picture is already outdated because we don't have three grandchildren. We actually have four grandchildren now. And Becky's not here because she's watching the grandkids. Isn't she amazing? Yes. And so these are our four. And all three of our four kids are married except for this beautiful woman right here. That's Erin. It's our 25-year-old daughter. And if you're a young man eligible and interested, come see me at the end of the talk today. You must meet certain criteria, of course. It's grueling is what it is. It's grueling. Well, let's pray as we come. Thank you for loving us. Yes. We thank you for sending Jesus to be our Lord and Savior, our brother and our friend. And Lord, I thank you that this room is full of people who are hungry to learn about spiritual identity, spiritual authenticity, the passages of our spiritual life. And Lord, I pray that you would come and be the great teacher today. That you would go way beyond what I could ever do. And that you would impart Holy Spirit the very thing that is needed in each one of these unique lives here. Just impart that unique nugget of truth to them so that they can have light on their journey in Jesus' name. And everyone said, Amen. Amen. All right. We are going to take a journey together. When our kids were much younger, we took an out west vacation from the great state of Minnesota where we were pastoring and we still live there all the way 1600 miles to the Grand Canyon. How many of you have ever been to the Grand Canyon? Raise your hand. Oh, okay. About a third of us have been there. Isn't it amazing? I mean, pictures cannot do it justice. But we drove for days and days and we stopped, of course, along the way as you have to do with kids. Keep them entertained and you stop. But I had pre-booked hotel reservations very near the Grand Canyon. The problem was we were arriving at night. I was very tired and I was a man and I was not willing to admit that I was lost. I was momentarily disoriented. There's a big difference, okay? There's a big difference. I was not lost. So I was frustrated. And it was like one of those real dark nights. But I knew we were close to the hotel because we had passed the sign that said Grand Canyon National Park and we drove past the sign and we were driving in trying to find where's our hotel? And suddenly I stopped that minivan and I said, kids, wait a minute. It was like a moment of revelation. I looked on this side and there was some picnic tables, a little outhouse and some a little light over there. But I looked out that side of the car and it was a sea of vast blackness. And I said, kids, we are here. You can't see it, but we were literally so close to the rim of the Grand Canyon you could have taken a rock and thrown it over the edge of the Grand Canyon. We were that close. Why do I tell you that story? Because the Grand Canyon by day looks like this, but the Grand Canyon by night looks a lot like this. And sometimes in our spiritual journey, we can be very close to something awesome that God is introducing to us. But because we don't have light for it, we don't understand the grandeur of it. And so it's my prayer that as we're talking right now that there's going to become some light on the Grand Canyon that God has you standing right next to. So we're going to go on a journey. And this journey involves different seasons and passages of time. And what we're going to actually talk about today takes a lifetime to fulfill. Some of the principles we're talking about are mystical. And we only get to different places in God as we cooperate with the Holy Spirit. We cannot fast forward this process. The best we can do is cooperate with God in the process. All right, here is a great jumping off point in Psalm 84. Blessed are those whose strength is in you, who have set their hearts on pilgrimage. A pilgrimage is a journey to a sacred place. Do you know that you're blessed if you understand that your spiritual life has movement? Built into your spiritual reality is movement. And when we lead someone to Christ we should be careful to tell them, welcome to the beginning of your journey. And it's going to change and morph and grow and God's going to do amazing things in you and through you. But it's only the beginning. Happy spiritual birthday. Blessed are you if you understand that your heart is on a pilgrimage. It implies movement. Now it says here, as they pass through the valley of Baca, this Hebrew word Baca means weeping. How many of you have passed through on your journey some valleys of weeping? Yeah, it's like God, where are you and why am I in this valley and what in the world is going on? I thought I was going to have this wonderful spiritual experience. But God is faithful. They make it a place of springs. The autumn rains also cover it with pools. Even in our valley he prepares a table for us. And then it says they go from strength to strength until each one appears before God and Zion. Now this is important. We go from strength to strength as we grow. The New Testament says we go from glory to glory. We go from faith to faith. There's a movement of strength to strength, glory to glory. And this is what it looks like. We go from one strength to a new strength. That doesn't make that strength bad, wrong, or immature. It was the strength for that season. We go from strength to another strength to another strength to another strength. Each are valid and each are a grace given us in God. And so when we're talking about journey, we're talking about going from strength to strength. Now, Augustine said this, people travel to wonder at the height of the mountains, at the huge waves of the sea, at the long courses of the river, at the vast compass of the ocean, and the circular motion of the stars. And they pass by themselves without wondering. I want to tell you, you are fearfully wonderfully made. And a lot of times we think about that in the physical body. Obviously we are. But spiritually and your soul is also wonderfully put together. And so, yeah, we can look at the Grand Canyon, we can marvel at various things, but today we're just going to pause for 60 minutes and we're going to wonder at the work of God in you. Mr. Huxley, Dr. Huxley, I don't agree with him. He's an atheist and I don't agree with his worldview, but I thought this quote was amazing and very challenging. If most of us remain ignorant of ourselves, it's because self-knowledge is painful and we prefer the pleasures of illusion. So self-knowledge is sometimes a scary thing. Have you ever had God pull the curtain back on your own heart? You're like, ouch, that was really ugly. I prefer illusion. No, let's move and say, God bring me into the light as I move along on this journey. All right, now in your handout notes, you see this page, it's page two there. Turn it sideways, get ready to draw on this. This page we're going to spend most of our time on. And what I'm going to have you do is draw in your own pen and your own hand your map, a map. When I was a kid being raised in church, I would doodle in church if I was bored. I would draw pictures of the funniest looking choir member. I would draw pictures of the pastor because I was bored in church doodle doodle in the back of the hymnal, or something to write on. Well, you're going to be writing today, but it's not because you're bored, but because you're drawing a map. And let's begin. Take your pen and draw the first line coming up from below the cross, piercing right through the cross and into the above that double parallel line. And for those of you listening by audio, which is why we have the recording device here, I apologize that this is only audio, but if you want a digital printout or a copy of this map, go to www.journeytoauthenticity.com and there is a copy of this map with a lot of other helpful videos and downloads. Journeytoauthenticity.com. All right, label this Stage 1 New Life. This is where our journey begins. In Stage 1 is when we came to Christ for salvation. We came to the cross, didn't we? We left our past behind. We said, Lord, forgive me of my sin. I come to the old rugged cross, you know, and I need to have that sin forgiven and I want to become part of your family. This is a very exciting starting point for your journey. You realize that God's your Father and your sins are forgiven. You're filled with awe and wonder. But for each of these stages, hear me, for each of these stages, there's strengths and there's weaknesses. We impact this in greater detail in the book. By the way, Shameless Commercial. We have some books available for a reduced rate of $10. You can buy them on Amazon for $14 or $15. They're $10 right here. They are called Journeytoauthenticity. Built in each chapter is like a small group study guide at the end of each chapter, so if you want to do this with a group, this book has been translated into four languages. And we've taught this around the world and God continues to give perspective on people's journey, because perspective is power. All right, we're in stage one. This is what Scripture says. 2 Corinthians 5.17, you know this verse. If you're in Christ's, you're a new creation. The old is gone, the new has come. You also know Romans 8.1. There is therefore now no condemnation when you are in Christ. This is why this stage is so wonderful is because you realize you're a child of God. You're not under the condemnation and you're beginning to explore this new creation life. All right, on your map, please label these two zones. The one below the double parallel line. Label it despised self. Up here, label this. Ideal self. Now there's a reason why we have to make sure this is clear, because when we came to Christ, we left our despised self with all of its baggage and bondages and sin and brokenness, and we began to, right here, experience a realm we never thought was possible for calling that ideal self. All right, get ready to draw stage two like this. Steps and label it stage two learner. Everyone say learner. Learner is drawn like stair steps because when you're going upstairs, there is a rise and a run to every staircase, a rise and a run. Any carpenters in here ever build stair stringers? Let me see your hand. All right, if you've ever built stair stringers, you know how important it is to carefully measure the rise and the run if you want to pass code, right? Rise and run, and it has to be consistent. When we are in stage two learner, yes, we've been to stage one, we've been saved, we are like dry sponges, we want to learn all that God has for us. We open the Bible and we're at the church. Every time the church doors are open, we sign up for every small group. We want to learn. And we draw this like stair steps because the rise of the stairs is when you learn a new truth. The run is when you apply it to your life. The rise is when you learn a new truth. The run is when you actually apply it to your life. For example, you come to church here, Pastor Lee preaches a great sermon on the virtue of patience. Patience is a fruit of the spirit. And then you pray the most dangerous prayer you've ever prayed. Lord, make me a patient person. And the Lord spends the next nine months of your life giving you opportunity to exercise patience. People cut in front of you in traffic. People offend you. You have to wait in super long lines. The checkout person there is super slow. And what is happening there is if you cooperate with the dealings of God in stage two, learner, we're talking about your progress on your journey. This is when people start coming up to you and saying, wait a minute, you're different. You've changed. You used to be like this, and now you don't act that way anymore. Isn't that exciting? The rise and the run, learn the truth, apply the truth. Now, this is a danger, because sometimes we think that Christianity is learning truths. The book of James says, do not just know the truth and deceive yourself. Do what it says. So James hits us hard in learning, doing, learning, doing. By the way, if you try to skip up these stairs, hop scotch, jump over some stairs, warning will Robinson. It will show up later in your Christian walk as character deficits. Don't rush through this wonderful, vitally important stage. That's why Jesus said, I'm going away. Go make disciples of all nations, teaching them to obey everything I've commanded you. So when you're in stage two, you're insatiably hungry in all you can. Now, Scripture says two stage two learners in 1 Peter 2, 1 through 3, like newborn babies crave pure spiritual milk so that by it you may grow up in your salvation. And that's what's going on. We're growing up in our salvation. All right, get ready. Does your map look like this so far? Let me look around the class. Okay, no one's sleeping. Get ready to draw stage three. It looks like this. Stage three takes us higher into the realm of our ideal self than any other stage. And when you draw it, make sure you draw these peaks and these valleys ever increasing in size and label it stage three warrior. Why do we draw a warrior like this? The peaks, you see these peaks? The peaks for a warrior are every battle we win. The valleys are our defeats. And you know what? We are warriors. We have both victories and defeats. But when we're warriors, when we're defeated, knocked to the floor, we're like a rubber ball. If I were to take a rubber ball and throw it down to the ground, guess what? It would bounce up even higher. And when we're warriors, we're pretty much unstoppable. We get knocked down. We said, oh, the devil beat me up that time. But I pick up my sword. Jesus, show me the next, you know, hill to take for you. Where's the next giant to slay? I am your warrior. See, warriors are about accomplishment. And church history is full of great stories where warriors have accomplished and done so many exploits. We owe so much to warriors. Unfortunately, too often in church, we mistreat our warriors. You know what we do? We pat them on the head and say, you know what, honey, you're a little bit too overzealous. Why don't you go sit in the corner so you don't hurt anybody and come back to us when your faith is lukewarm like the rest of us? No. We need to help our warriors and say, we're going to feed you jet fuel. Now, in wisdom, we are going to give you some parameters and some guides, okay? You need to be able to not crash the car if you're in the driveway. Keep it on the road, but here's my lesson for you. Go for it, and we're going to help empower you. Church history is full of this. Martin Luther was a warrior when he nailed the 95 feces on the Wittenberg door, wasn't he? People stood up. Great things, great injustices have been righted by warriors. Warriors are both women and men. You don't have to be a man to be a warrior. You mess with something that a woman is passionate about. You will see a warrior, princess. What's her name? Zeena or something like that? So you will see a mess with her kids. You will see a warrior. A mess with a truth that she's passionate about. You will see a warrior. This is a male and female experience. We are warriors, and what does scripture say? First John 2. Have you ever read First John 2 where John says, children, young men, and fathers? And he repeats them each, doesn't he? These are not age designations. They are spiritual life stage designations. Don't miss this. Go back and reread it. I write to you children, young men, and fathers. And what he writes to them, what he says to them applies to spiritual life stages. Now for stage two, warrior, young men, you're strong and the word of God lives in you and you've overcome the evil one. This is what it's all about when we're warriors. And here's David on one of his manic days. And we know that David had his manic days and his depressed days just read the book of Psalms. And here, with your help God, I can advance against the truth and I can leap over a wall. There's nothing that's going to stop me with you God, because I am your warrior. Semper Fi. Alright. Now let's just pause right here and say that probably nothing that I've just said is new to you. Because the church does very well at talking about these first three stages of our spiritual journey. Think about it. Come to Jesus for salvation to be born again stage one new life. Read your Bible and learn of God's word and his ways right? Become a disciple. Read the Bible. And then number three leverage your gifts to advance the kingdom. And serve in the church, serve out of the church and we think we're successful because we've helped people through their spiritual life stages. Wrong. We've only helped them through the first three. We don't talk about stages four five and six very much if at all. Why? They're not glamorous. We often don't even have a theology for them. I call them the silent stages because we just don't talk about them at church. You see the teaching of journey to authenticity grew out of the dark night of the soul that I went through. I was pastoring a successful church a growing church multi-staffed church wonderful things were happening in the church I had no reason to be sad or depressed as a matter of fact as a warrior pastor I actually said from the pulpit once for you people who are depressed I hope you get over it because this church is moving forward. I mean wasn't I a compassionate pastor? I was so compassionate. I was a warrior and for warriors one of the weaknesses of warriors is we are insensitive to the weaknesses of others. Okay this teaching grew out of the dark night of the soul that I went through. Suddenly my faith didn't work like it used to. I felt myself falling out of the sky and I wasn't sure if I would crash the plane right into the ground and I didn't understand it. And it was something I wrote in my journal I literally wrote some of the key points of this whole teaching in my journal and closed it for two years and didn't even talk to anyone about it. I thought probably half of this is heresy I dare not share it with anyone. But in the course of time I began to talk about these truths to mature Christians they said Sonny this is not only true but the rest of the body needs to hear it. So that's a little background on where this all came from. The church does great at stages one, two, and three but let us introduce you now to stages four, five, and six. They are just as spiritual. I don't think you believe me. Stages four, five, and six are just as spiritual just as God led. Get ready. Begin to draw stage four like this. I told you it was just as spiritual. Now don't laugh. Now when you draw the beginning stage four, draw this dotted line south of the bottom parallel because it's optional and any line that you see that's dotted is optional. Please don't take it. Don't take it. Do you remember Passion Week when Jesus was being arrested and was going to the cross? His disciples fled. Judas betrayed him. Judas took a fall. Now remember, Judas traveled with Jesus for those three years. He saw the miracles. He heard the teachings. He was part of all of that stuff. When Judas took his fall, he kept going and if you've been in ministry for any length of time, as a pastor or as a church, you've seen people who are once glorious warriors who have taken a fall. They've been offended. They've been hurt. Something has happened in their life and they have fired God. They have fired this church. They get cynical and they take a nosedive and you're like trying to help them but they keep going. They keep this, the dotted line. They keep going into some very dark and terrible places. However complete writing out what this stage looks like and label it stage 4 brokenness. Now when you draw brokenness it kind of looks like an electrocardiogram, doesn't it? Make the top of it pierce above the top parallel line and the bottom some of those bottoms pierce below the bottom parallel line and then when you draw it have that electrocardiogram kind of tapered down and tapered down smaller and smaller. Here's why. When we are in brokenness it is a place of tremendous confusion. It's a place of tremendous vulnerability to the devil. Let's just be honest. We're vulnerable. Our faith doesn't make sense anymore. You know what? I went from being a warrior to this broken confused person. God where are you and why is this happening to me? Let me make something perfectly clear right now. Brokenness is not spiritual failure. Brokenness can lead to spiritual failure but you can continue and you should continue to minister even through brokenness. I was teaching this some years ago in the great state of Texas and there was a pastor sitting off to my right. He was probably 65 years old and he said now that you have taught through the journey I understand what I've been going through for the last 10 years and I thought to myself, Dear God, can this broken stage last for a decade? The fact is it can. And this good faithful pastor continued to preach, pray, worship, marry, bury, counsel, all the stuff even though his soul was a wreck. This is why we like the Psalms. We go to the Psalms because they help give a nomenclature to the things that we're afraid to say even out loud. Alright. Brokenness is drawn like this because it describes what Peter went through. Remember, Judas took this Peter. It says after he denied that he even knew Christ, what did he do? He went out and he wept bitterly. He wept bitterly because he was disappointed in God. He was confused about God's plan. Why is this happening? Is your sword swinging warrior? Now I've denied you to a servant girl that I even knew you three times I denied you. It's okay to go out and weep bitterly because brokenness while it is not spiritual failure it is a birthing time. It is a birthing of something new in your life. If you'll allow me, it's a coming home it's a coming home time and I'm gonna unpack that in just a second. See when we're in brokenness we're bouncing around like a ping pong ball up and down and look at some of these peaks we think you know what? I'm gonna regain my warrior self again. I'm gonna recover. This is just a bad battle I'm going through. I'm gonna be okay. I'm gonna start with the Eagles again. And then the next day you're quite sure you're demon possessed by the elders. God send the elders to anoint me with oil because I've got seven demons in me. And it's like no I'm not okay. Well wait a minute maybe I can be okay. And we're buffeted between what are we buffeted between our despised self is calling to us. And our ideal self is saying come back to the glory days again. And here's what we learn in stage 4 that living in ideal self was never meant to be an eternal reality. I know that might mess with your theology. A lot of charismatic don't like this teaching because we think that ideal self warrior is the zenith and the ultimate of spiritual vitality. It's a wonderful part of it but it's not true. And when I say we're coming home let's look at the scripture Simon Simon this is Jesus to Peter right? Satan has asked to sift you like we hey what happens when we sift we we get rid of the what so that the what can remain the pure grain the usable eatable pure grain so sifting is actually a good thing. So Peter Satan has demanded to sift you like we isn't it interesting that the creator of the universe didn't tell Peter Peter you're my homeboy I'm gonna tell the devil to keep his hands off of you he didn't say that. He said Peter I'm gonna pray for you you're gonna go through this you're gonna go through it and I'm gonna pray that your faith may not fail because it's gonna do something beautiful in you Peter if your faith does not fail watch this on the other side you're gonna come back and strengthen the brothers like you've never been able to strengthen them before so he was this same Peter who said all these losers might deny you Jesus but I'm your sword swinging warrior and I will never deny you and then on the other side of this brokenness experience Jesus meets him on the beach feeds him all the lunch supernatural lunch and he says Peter do you love me come on let's get let's pair everything else off let's get all the baggage off and let's go back to rebuilding your from all that brokenness that removed all your your pride and self-strength now Peter do you love me take care of my little lambs isn't wonderful that Jesus could trust Peter to take care of his little lambs without making them lamb chops because if he would have been taking care of lambs over here he would have been you know lamb chops up for forever same is true with you and me when I was a warrior pastor I was a hard charging type A D on the disc profile type guy I was going for it and we were seeing a lot of spiritual fruit glorious I was a glorious warrior but you know what I turned around in those days and I saw a lot of bodies behind me I saw a lot of people who you know the most dangerous person when you're in stage 4 broken is the most dangerous person to be around in church a warrior because they're bleeding on the ground confused and you don't know why you can't get up and you don't have strength to get up a warrior runs by and says get up or I'll run you through with my sword alright you'll be able to strengthen your brothers when you come through this thing and here is what I want you to now draw on your map why do I say brokenness is a coming home please draw this authentic self lives between the double parallel lines get this authentic self is a third dimension do you see we've spent half the first half of our Christian life thinking there's two dimensions the good and the bad the despised self which we knew that was bondage right bondage to sin bondage to all these terrible things that we used to be a part of but when we are going through stage 4 we realize that to be honest with you some of ideal self was bondage bondage to self strength bondage to selfish ambition bondage to self motivation all of that stuff is being paired from our life and the Lord says I don't want you to go back to despised self and you cannot stay in ideal self get ready I'm going to introduce you because something new is going to be birthed in you it's an introduction to the new thing I'm trying to show you and I'm calling it authentic self what is our working definition for authenticity I'm going to use my hands for this because I love the hand illustration authenticity is when the real God merges with the real you the real God merges and is expressed through the real you not some facsimile of who you thought God was but the real God merges with the real you real you not mother Teresa not Billy Graham you when the real God is expressed through the real you authenticity this is one of the mysteries of the gospel Christ in you is the hope of glory it's amazing it's you with all of your uniqueness you're totally different than the person sitting next to you so God wants to be expressed through you uniquely authenticity don't apologize for who you've been become so authentic self is here and look at this according to this graph when we're going through brokenness now it doesn't feel like this at the moment but we're actually closer to meeting our ideal self our authentic authentic self than we ever have been when we're going through brokenness God is saying loving introduce you to someone it's your authentic self let's try it out now I want to talk to you about some parking lots two parking lots I'm going to teach you about because stage 4 is so painful and confusing we invent ways to get out of it we do not like the pain we don't like the time we don't like the confusion we love being a warrior and we go out it's like God I didn't sign up for this I'm pulling off there what is a parking lot a parking lot is when you stop your journey you pull off into a comfortable place you find a clear lane you pull in you put it in park you turn off your motor and your journey is stopped I believe that 60% of the body of Christ is in one of these two parking lots not moving stuck started a journey and got stuck in the journey alright let's draw them again a dotted line off the bottom of stage 4 a dotted line why is it dotted because it's optional please don't take it you don't have to take it and draw that little space what, carnal Christianity this is what we would define as a backslidden Christian someone who says you know what I didn't sign up for this I used to be a warrior I didn't sign up too well people in this parking lot are self medicating on old sin they're like God I hope I go to heaven when I die but I'll tell you what you leave me alone and I'll leave you alone I want all a lot of people die without moving any further they've had a wonderful spiritual experience in their past something has happened and because this has been so confusing they pull off and they say done we call it carnal Christianity the other is a little bit more difficult to define because it looks so good I said it looks so good go ahead and draw this off of one of the peaks of stage 4 and label it pseudo spirituality what does pseudo mean false fake and phony pseudo spirituality people who are in this parking lot where does this live this doesn't live down and despise itself these people are trying to regain their glory days and they're trying to fake it till they make it their pseudo spirituality pseudo is fake spirituality they're trying to regain the reality of their ideal self because they think that that is what victorious faith looks like people living in pseudo spirituality are oftentimes they want you to be impressed with their spiritual giftedness they usually cannot find a church spiritual enough for them to attend if the pastor of that church tries to speak any correction to them they bolt these people are under the spirit of weirdness because they have launched into facsimilating a way of relating to God while avoiding the very dealings of God charismatic and pentecostals we're great at this because we think that faith has to always look this way when really we want to say would you just put that stuff down and let's deal with what's really going on in your soul and let the Lord have His way in there because you don't have to kind of regain that glory because there's an authenticity the Lord's trying to introduce you to you don't have to try to be that one flaming torch that you used to be as a pastor I started calling these people the granola crowd you know what granola is it's a gathering of fruits, flakes and nuts and that's what these people are they get very flaky and that's the granola crowd and you just want to stand on terra firma and say come back to us we love you let's just be real and let's walk together through brokenness I know it's hurtful I know it's confusing but you don't have to pretend like that come on parking lot of voids therefore my dear friends as you've always obeyed not only my presence but now much more in my absence continue to work out your salvation we just heard this preach this morning work out your salvation not work for your salvation with fear and trembling over the work of God in your life it's biblical to be full of such conviction that God I don't know what's going on here but I need to cooperate with you I'm undone work it out with fear and trembling why? because it's the devil who is at work is that what the Bible says wait a minute what does this verse say who's at work it's that nasty boss of yours that's at work in you that's why you're all messed up it's your spouse see when we're going through stage 4 we blame other people for our problems and we even blame the devil for our problems the fact is that oftentimes we don't even have a theology for what we're going through when I was a young pastor for the first half of my ministry I didn't think that this was biblical or real like I said before I thought it was heresy and I thought if this happened it only happened to weak people it's certainly not going to happen to me it happens to spiritual losers, weak people but it's God who is at work in you you know what people who are in the parking lots are fighting God they're fighting the workings of God but they're clinging to their gifts they're clinging to their their medicating sins whatever it is but it's actually God who is at work in you to will and to act according to his good purpose alright here we go stage 5 looks like a cross remember when I had you draw stage 4 as tapering down like that everything that has happened in stage 4 brokenness by the grace of God if you cooperate is leading you to stage 5 surrender it's a cross you know what there are two crosses in Christianity the first is the cross of salvation that Jesus died on to save you the second cross is the cross of surrender that you get to die on you really do Jesus said hey if you're going to be my follower pick up your cross follow me don't be surprised at this this cross of surrender is a place of great stillness a great bit of immobility and we pray prayers like Jesus prayed Father forgive them for they don't know what they're doing and we have to forgive because a lot of times in our brokenness experience there have been people involved and we have to make sure we're forgiving them we pray prayers like Jesus prayed God why have you forsaken me why in the world is this happening to me unless you come through I'll never live again do you know that this subject of death to self and mortification of our carnal life has been written a lot about a lot in church history watchman knee how many of you have read watchman knee any of his stuff introduce yourself to the writings of watchman knee because he talks a lot about this but here's the thing a lot of times when people think about death to their self they think because I'm a high achiever Christian I'm going to make this happen because I'm going to cooperate with the will of God so we get a hammer and three long nails and we go to that proverbial cross we put our feet together we drive in the first nail bam, bam, bam and we say we take the first nail and we hold it with this hand and we take the hammer and go bam, bam, bam ahh oh this self crucifixion is terrible it's painful but I'm going to get it done God and then we realize we got a problem who's going to drive in the last nail that's when God sends your enemies and some of your friends who are very good with a hammer and nail by the way and they do you a great service and you get to die like Jesus and say, I'm not going to be bitter Lord forgive them I'm not talking about a victim mentality I'm just saying whatever it is that's trying to fight, prove, defend all that stuff you see what's happening in stage four is a brokenness much like a stallion needs to be broken right? you see a stallion running around strong and virile but if that stallion is ever going to be trained to pull the carriage of the king it has to go through something we call brokenness breaking of all of its self strength being willing to lay down the very gifts of strength that it has so that on the other side there might be something new let me tell you something hopeful friend for every cross you experience in Jesus there is a resurrection on the other side I'm going to say that again for every cross you experience in Jesus there is a resurrection on the other side you see the God you serve is not a sadist nor is he a killjoy he is a redeemer and he is thoroughly convinced to help you in your journey Galatians 2 20 Paul had a revelation of this I've been crucified with Christ and I no longer live the life I now live I live by faith in the Son of God who loved me and gave himself for me get ready we're going to draw the sixth and final stage and it looks like this take the double parallel line and make it open up like the bell of a trumpet and draw that arrow victorious have yourself an Easter sunrise service just for your own resurrection and stage six authenticity is what I call this now I want to be clear because in calling the stage six authenticity does not mean that the prior five stages you were inauthentic because when you were a warrior you were being authentic to where you were at that time remember we go from strength to strength to strength so being those other things doesn't mean you were inauthentic in the other stages but I'm using this word authenticity in the broadest sense of the term authenticity now what does scripture say David says I will rejoice in your love you saw my affliction and knew the anguish of my soul you have not handed me over to the enemy but you have set my feet where what's it say in the bible in a spacious place isn't this a beautiful picture because when you're here see being nailed to the cross you're quite immobile and you're like God into your hands I commit my spirit on the other side of that God begins to open up a big dance floor you're no longer walking a tightrope for Jesus you're in a spacious place you're in a big place now I want to be very careful in the way it teaches because notice that it reaches up into the realms of ideal self and even into the depths of despised self when you're here in life the things of your warrior ideal self come to you easily you don't have to strive you don't have to prove or defend anything you're just there by the grace of God they're coming to you number two the things of the old despised self no longer have a grip on you no longer have a hold on you let me just put it this way you can go places without sinning that you couldn't go before because the cross has had a very thorough work in your life now I'm not talking about being light with sin I'm just saying you can move with great latitude and freedom because of your authentic self okay this is the spacious place now right now we're going to pause and I'm going to ask you to look at the map that you should have that map right in front of you I hope it looks something like this and I'm going to ask you to answer this question where are you now not where do you hope to be a decade ago where are you now and I'm going to ask you to take your pen or pencil and draw a little stick figure of yourself somewhere on the map draw a little stick figure of yourself it might be in a parking lot no condemnation if you're there admit it if you're in brokenness no problem if you're a warrior draw that little stick figure there now let me give you a warning we tend to place ourselves further along on the map than we actually are why because we're hopeful or because we're standing somewhere and we see the mountain range in the distance and we think we own it no you just see it from a distance you're not standing on the mountain you just begin to understand a little bit of it so I'm going to answer that question in just a second I'm going to answer that question just a second so try to the best of your ability draw a little stick figure to hide your answer I understand if you don't want to show the person next to you now please draw that stick figure because it's the thinnest you will ever be and don't lose the opportunity to draw yourself is this wonderful stick figure the next page we're going to run through this and what we're going to do is I will offer a time for Q&A but because there's so much material here we're going to just kind of get it out there and we'll have you stay after if you want to stay and ask some questions or have some dialogue I'd be more than happy to do that understanding the journey here's some things you need to know we tend to think that our current stage on our journey will be continue to be our experience forever wrong you are moving remember your heart is on a pilgrimage everything that the Holy Spirit is doing is a forward movement in your life glory to glory you're moving and now this could be good news or bad news right if you're a warrior it's not that good news if you're in stage four at least you get to say hey things are going to get better next we have a home stage but can visit the other proceeding stages in which we've already lived the home stage is where you drew your stick figure that's your that's where God has you in this journey right now that's fine let's call that your home stage now for example if you're stage three warrior you still own stages one and two they were built into who you are so you can visit those stages you never stop learning for example and you never stop celebrating the fact that you're saved you're a warrior now but those things are a part of you got it one stage is not better or more spiritual than any of the others each has their important place sometimes when we see graduating numbers stage one two three four we think well certainly the higher numbers are more spiritual not true every stage has a glory of its own every stage is important and vital to move through in God's way and in God's time next we tend to look down on others in earlier stages and misunderstand those in future stages I came fresh out of Bible college into a church in southern Illinois I was a youth pastor I was on fire for God and of course being a Bible college graduate I had all the answers so I was very happy to tell you them and I was ready to charge hell and extinguish it with a squirt gun so that was me I was that warrior and it was at a church my sister and my brother-in-law my late brother-in-law were founding members of that church and he was in deep stage 4 brokenness I had no language for where he was at but he was in deep stage 4 brokenness I remember coming to his house and I was in his living room telling him about all these wonderful things the youth group is doing and all these great things God's doing through us and he sat back on his lazy boy and said, sonny you are young and idealistic and man that's dumb not to be outdone I said, Fred you are old and burnt out that's what you are what was going on there the older said, yeah I've been there got that t-shirt yeah I remember when I was that way just like you and I was looking at him saying we got hold of the best thing on earth how come you're not in the game buddy we can often misunderstand people who are in different stages by the way Fred did not need my quips and my quick pat answers he needed to come alongside him bind his wounds with oil and wine sit with him and affirm his identity in Christ that's what he needed I did not have the means to do that unfortunately all the time how well we're living our current life stage largely determines our success in the one to come so wherever God has you in the journey you can't do it anyway by the way be a student of your current life stage and when you fully squeeze the sponge of that current life stage and allow yourself to cooperate with God's dealing of that current life stage he'll move you ahead in one to come an axiom is a short statement of truth which captures a timeless principle I'm going to give you these very quickly and these are not necessarily in your notes but I'll just throw them out there because if I had a moment to sit with people in each of these six stages of life and I had a second to tell them here's some advice for you this is the axiom I would give them like you would use them God you will be alright stage one celebrate grace you know what this is what you need to know it's a grace that saved you and grace will lead you home celebrate it because God saved you not by your own good works or merit but by his amazing grace this is not in your notes so you won't find it there number two learn all you can if you're in stage two learn yeah like I said be at the church every time the doors are open open your Bible learn to read it for yourself learn to hear God for yourself hey you warriors in stage three this is my word for you go for it don't apologize for your youthful zeal you know warriors are buoyant in faith we got division out the yazu and we're ready to go for it okay and you should go for it next if you're in stage four brokenness hang on don't give up now I know that doesn't sound very glamorous but sometimes just hanging on and being persistent is what victory looks like in stage four brokenness number five if you're in stage five surrender die well now I know that sounds like the ultimate proxy moron because we've seen people go through an invitation to their cross and because they fight it they're like a tiger in a cage they're growling they're scratching they're tearing up everything in sight people who are not dying well at God's invitation ruin marriages they ruin churches they ruin relationships they ruin occupations they ruin families because they're fighting fighting fighting if you're near in stage five is die well go back and read the gospels read how Jesus died and model it number six if you're in authenticity stage six live to give do not go into spiritual retirement move to Arizona drink iced tea and play shuffleboard don't do it we need you in the body of Christ to turn around and say hey here's some stories here's here's what I learned when I was going through what where you're at and you know what there's there's joy in the spiritual life there's victory at the end let's go through because each stage is glorious now this is the most common question that I get whenever I teach this how often do I have to go through this did you know that western thought is very linear right just like even the map we just drew it's very linear stage stage stage stage stage all in a line we tend to think that way eastern thought is cyclical and by the way the bible with we know love and read is out of the east so it's cyclical so which is true both are true and this is this is what we have to understand this is in your nose you see that page with that big red circle draw take that and label it life death resurrection this three-step process is going to unlock some tremendous help for us on our journey did you know life death and resurrection is the process of spiritual growth it's the process that Jesus came to redeem us read philippines too life death resurrection this whole cycle is how you grow spiritually it's how you go through challenges and it's how you grow and this is woven in through nature and through the business realm and every realm it's a spiritual truth and I call it a micro cycle because we go through this many times in our journey this is why it's important alright if you're going to talk about life death and resurrection linearly ok you could look at this whole idea linearly how many times do I have to go through it I would say one time early on in our life it's all about a discovery of great new life in the middle we go through some very serious death process and at the end when we submit to that process we come to a new resurrection so yes we go through that once but I want you to see this you see this in your handout you go through micro cycles in every stage of life as a matter of fact the more you can go through micro cycles early on before stage four the big one the better off you will navigate stage four the big one here's why have you ever heard of the term muscle memory muscle memory is what makes athletes great because they don't have to even think through how they shoot the ball and muscle memory you have used muscle memory today when you got in your car to drive here you took that key right and you didn't have to look now where's that darn hole I gotta stick the key in you know what you've done it so many times you take the key and you just stick it in there because you have muscle memory or if you are fortunate and you have the button press start you don't know where is that button I know that button is around here on the dashboard somewhere no you just go ok start the car you've done it a hundred times muscle memory micro cycles give us spiritual muscle memory and when we go through and cooperate with the process of life death and resurrection and we realize that on the other side of every cross that we are introduced to there is in fact a resurrection on the other side when we go through that enough we get spiritual muscle memory that when we are going through the big one the big one we say wait a minute god this hurts I'm confused and I feel like I'm about to fail and die and flame on but I'm gonna trust you and I'm gonna cooperate with you that there's a resurrection on the other side of this thing micro cycles happen all through oh let me tell you a quick story I was teaching this in the great state of Ohio some years ago and a young man right in bible college he was in bible college he was home visiting his parents and he was like all of 19 years old and I taught this concept and he said oh pastor bro I remember when I was up there and I remember when I went through all that brokenness stuff and bro I remember when I went through all that I was terrible and I'm glad I came through to the other side of authenticity I thought to myself young man you might have stubbed your toe going up stage 2 but you haven't taken the big one yet see what was going on in his life he had just broken up with a girlfriend and it felt like the big one because he defined that as life I need to hold on to this relationship God said take it to the cross he had to let it go death hey puppy love is real to the puppy when we're going through a micro cycle going through a process of death I wanted to be not even tell you the stories but you have stories of going through micro cycles something you clung to the Lord Jesus says lay it down you lay it down and he resurrects it supernaturally on the other side you're like mind blown so this guy says yeah I've been through all of that I've been through stage 4 well he experienced a micro cycle in bible college and that's the extent of it thank God for that but there was so much more ahead of him now it's important to understand that now here's hope for you I always pray with joy because of your partnership with the gospel from the first day until now being confident of this that he who what began a good work and you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus the Lord is totally committed to help you in your journey and I hope through this talk some light has been shown on the grand canyon of your life because some of you here are right at the cusp of something awesome and great and grand in God but you can't see it yet I said you can't see it yet you can't perceive it but it's right there you're right close to it and when we get some light on it when we get some understanding on it we begin to see oh yeah this is what God is doing in my life so I'd like to pray for you especially if you are going through stage 4 brokenness or stage 5 surrender I would encourage you to take the way of Christ maybe you're here today and you're going through a micro cycle you're going through something where the Lord's asking you to lay something down let it die and surrender some things okay that is a normative part of your spiritual life but you need grace to go through it and I'm going to pray for spiritual muscle memory to be formed in you father in the name of Jesus right now the Holy Spirit just let the Holy Spirit touch you right now where you're seated there are people going through brokenness and because of this teaching today they have an idea they have words they have an understanding of what's going on Lord they have realized that you have not abandoned them nor have you forsaken them but you're actually right in the middle of this Lord for people who are going through micro cycles of life death and resurrection Lord I pray that you'd give them spiritual muscle memory that they would learn that they would know everything that they need to know so that they can go through this and see a resurrection on the other side in the name of Jesus I thank you that you are a faithful God and you began a good work in these lives and you will carry it on now Lord I pray that you'd keep us out of the parking lots keep us from being spiritual fools keep us close to your heart and cooperating with the activity of the Holy Spirit in Jesus powerful name and everyone said Amen