 Welcome to every way to take charge. Face those imperfections. How do you do it, Cheryl? Well, you know what, I'm fortunate to have been blessed with a very, very healthy dose of confidence. So quite frankly, I don't let mine bother me all that much. A funny story I think of is a while back, my ex-boyfriend and I, and he's my boyfriend at the time, we were hanging out on the couch at my place and we decided we wanted to go grab some dinner. And so we left the house looking like we just came off the couch. We were couch potatoes. And then we drove into town and we saw this restaurant, the Goucho Grill, and we decided, you know, why don't we just go in? So we went in there, knowing good and well, we looked like crud, but we sat down and we had a meal. And since then, it became a tradition of ours to actually go back to that restaurant and intentionally look like crap. And it didn't matter because it's like, you know. Wait, wait, hold on. She said she wanna go to the restaurant and look like a brat. And then she went to the restaurant. Okay, yeah. Do you have time on beach? She didn't have a reservation. Oh, she got the table. No reservation? Look, I barely could. She was all alone. You know, I find it really interesting though because coming from the fashion industry as a model, where a lot of times these differences or these imperfections were celebrated as uniqueness. You know, their eyes are a little too close together. They've got this gap tooth and all this and their exotic beauties. And for me and most of the women, I know we look at ourselves in the mirror, we think, oh, you know, something's wrong with me. I hate this, I gotta change that. I wonder how much it costs for a nose job. When, how old do I have to be to start my Botox? I mean, I see everything that's wrong with me and it's really hard to think that those are things that make me individual or that I should celebrate. I think sometimes that it starts with our parents and our brothers and our siblings and our family. That's true. Because growing up, I had a grandmother and I loved her dearly now that she's gone. That was a happy thought. Thank God, bless her soul. Bless your grandma. Oh my God. But one of the things she used to say all the time is as I was getting older, you know, I have freckles and I had them a lot as a kid and she would look at me and she would look at me and go, ugh. You know, and then she'd move on. And that was her thing. We had a lot in common, Madison. Because my grandma used to tell me, you know, I used to love popsicles and like ice cream sandwiches and she'd be like, girl, you gonna be as big as this house, girl. Because I have a big booty. Yes, yes. And if I can get my booty sucked, I would just a little bit. And some people want to keep their stuff, but I would like to get mine sucked up a little bit. But she used to say, you know what? You keep eating those ice cream sandwiches, you want to be as big as this house. And I was skinny as a two-thing. I lived in San Francisco. I walked up hills and mountains. Oh my God. Did it give you the complex? Were you worried about being imperfect enough? Mm-hmm. As far as my booty. I think it does. It plays with you a little bit. I mean, now that I'm older, you know, my daughter has like, she's, you know, ain't, she has a little pop belly. And I'm like, oh, you know, but I try not to make up a song or tell her not to eat popsicles. I really want her to enjoy it. Make up a song for most of us. There was a mom, she used to make up a song like, oh, that big belly. Your song. She does the same thing. She does the same thing to you? She does the same thing to me the other day. She's only two. And she was singing to your belly. She's two of my belly. I know when I touch you, I'm like, uh. After I, my son was about four, about a year ago, and I'm a fit person, I consider myself to be extremely fit. And my son looked at me and I had gotten a little chubby. I was kind of depressed. I just started my divorce. And my, and my son looked at me and touched my belly and he goes, having another baby mommy. Oh, can you touch your belly? Yeah. And he's going, you have another baby mommy. I went, oh my gosh. What am I going to do? My whole point to like, my niece doing that to me and like, let's get real. I lost 160 pounds. Yeah. Right. Obviously, thank you. Obviously, that was my, like I have a lot of imperfections and that's one of them because I still, I still struggle with that, you know? But at the same time, I can't be looking at all my imperfections. I, I've learned to embrace them. Right. And that is one of the reasons that I ended up, you know, being on the cover of that magazine that actually took, and I said, okay, you know, because, you know, You celebrated those curbs. But what's the stereotype of being on a cover? Skinny, right? Mm-hmm. And I, yeah. You know, I got on and I got on and I got on. I have a Coca Cola body, but I would lug my hips and like just, my booty just, they get, maybe that's, I'm still on that tip. Right, you are. To get like a little firm, like, like I want the muscle, I want muscle there. You wanna see less minutes in your hourglass? Yeah. What do we look at? It jiggles sometimes, but I, I was teased. I was teased. But sometimes, sometimes women look at, generally speaking, they did a survey. Women look at what's attractive and we tend to look at what's on the thin side, including our men. Then men look at what's attractive, they tend to look on what's on the heavy side. Right. Men don't look at cosmopolitan and go, that girl's hot. They look at the muscle. You know what I think is really interesting though, in this conversation, is that when we are referring to imperfections, we are all talking about our bodies. And that's really telling of where our focus is because none of us have talked about our imperfections and, you know, our habits or our personalities or our lifestyles. What are you talking about? Yeah, exactly. I mean, I don't have any. I'm not speaking to anything. That's a good point. But you know, because it does start from the outside, because a lot of times what we feel on the inside is what we reflect and see on the outside. That's why we focus on the outside because it's the easiest thing to hit first in terms of work. Yeah, that's it. I'm in therapy right now. It's like they told me to look in the mirror. My therapist at one point did say that. He said, you know, when you look in the mirror, what you're seeing when you see these imperfect reflections is really just what you're struggling and what you're fearing inside of you. And those are the imperfections that we have to deal with. That's the only way we're ever gonna really embrace and love the perfection in our own perfection. You know what, now that I'm older, though, I don't really wanna take that much ice cream sandwiches. I mean, because now I know the outcome is my big butt. But I liked what Anna was saying earlier, because sometimes what can be perceived as an imperfection is what makes you beautiful. Wow. So it is kind of learning for yourself, because if we look at ourself in pieces, we can all break each other apart and break ourselves apart. But what does it look like as a whole? And what does it feel like as a whole? But if I was to look at myself in pinpoint at an imperfection that doesn't have to do with my looks, it would probably be that I'm too hard on myself. Wow. Too hard on myself. And that's truthful. And I had to have somebody here tell me that. So I realized that. And I was like, oh man, she's right. Well, if it makes you feel any better, I did make a New Year's resolution to drive around with a clean car inside and out. Wow. Not doing so well with that. Yeah. Thank you. Well, watch for your shiny car at the valet. We'll be right back. Coming up next, more Every Way Woman. I'm going to go and live my life. The memes working nine to five.