 Yo, this is Don't Flop, April Fools, the fourth annual April Fools event, one more time, birthdays, East London, make some fucking noise, let's go! What's cracking, it'll be up to at 20, at 25 now, I'm 25 years old today, but at 25, big up every single person that's played a part in the last five, six years of Don't Flop, it was crazy, shouts to my brother every time, crew, we were 19 years old, we started this shit, now we're in a, we're getting old and we don't know what we're doing in our life, man, fuck this. Last battle of the day, big up all the stuff, thanks to all the crowd for coming to a new location, new venue, new area, everything, alright, final battle, the main event of Main Events of the day, number one team on my right-hand side, the current two-on-two tag champs, the other name, make some noise and shuffle, Tia Marlo! Maybe one fucking round and that is it, so on the left-hand side, please, everybody, put your hands together, make some noise, make them feel welcome, fantastic, let's go! It's the Grudge Match shit going on right now, drink up! There's been a beef going on for a long time, off camera, I'm sure you've seen the blogs in all the forum post, man, we thought the only way to settle their differences was on the Don't Flop stage in the Don't Flop ring at April 4th, 2014, alright, fantastic, lost the flip, and yes, shuffle Tia Marlo chose to go first, so it's the final battle of the day, the main event, this is bigger than the fucking title match, baby, shuffle Tia Marlo round one, let's go! There were a lot of people who were opponents, you and two champs, we're the most perfect duo that's gonna think our nerves were soon to be broken, but now we're snapping twigging to frag your bits and we'll be burping you in a moment, who can little both think you're a cunt, you'll be in a tie-dye can, I'll straight up walk into a shop and fucking buy spry fag over sticks, I'll treat you guys like crap until you give Jeff his 3G and wife a can of twig, you'll get fucking snapped to bits and you'll end up with a shattered lid, I saw a girl walk up and purchase you in a pack of sticks and I wound up to learn, fuck, I'm fucking snapped to bits! He hit the forum and started moaning that we weren't wrapping up, and we were fired up like, man, I'm gonna smack this cunt, it's just a minute, you were too scared to battle us, it's ironic, you were shook and it gassed me up, picked you up and threw you in the forest out with my dog, and to be honest, that pissed him off, he tried back with a log, like what was that shit you lobbed? You think as you're a singular twig in the middle of this, you're all minimalist in art house, but I know all your secrets, let's bring up your past now, incest, yet it's getting pretty dark now, because you stick to your own since your family tree wouldn't leave and branch out, rather taste coke, your mum's a great oak, if you both walked into an actually great joke, a follow stick on twigga, I used to want him to follow me back quick, but then I checked his twig of beads and all it was was a blank script, and then it hit me, see, why as a blogger he's that shit, he doesn't have hands, because he's a damn stick! If you were a Christmas gift you'd be a type of sweater, if you were a human you'd be Michael Cera, you're the shitest drinker fucking sighted ever, you know your fucking shit when fucking sprite is better, and you should fear us when you hear that, this is a mere con versus a mere can, and if I mix the blend I'd make a better tasting mock of you, with 50 pence of Tesco Savers lemonade and orange juice, and he accepted his place, drank a pint of urine and diarrhea with nothing left of a trace, I challenged him to one shot of Fanta, and he felt so betrayed that he cried a single tear and shot himself in the face, in remembrance of Dave, so you're lucky you didn't get stabbed at entrance, I'ma have Fanta ended you stupid Jaffa bent kid, you look like cracker, blend it! On YouTube we're the realest bitch, we got screws loose like a Kia kiss, on a forest wood root when I seen this kid I confused you for a piece of shit, your audition for Harry Potter to be used as a star, is it true that the cast and crew members laugh that when you beg to be a one they said you ruined the park, who so you are, and if I see any of your female sticks I instantly lose my erection, and here I was, thinking that you were the dead words, we have no stress, you're as relevant as the Jonathan Ross Chachau guest, we'd only order you with a drink and a Nando's vet if there was no Coke Pepsi or tango left, right out of voice, so you'll get fucking shot with a bullet in your ass, understand, synonymise it, I said I'll pop a cap in your can, there's a similarity between you and me, when I throw those punches I'm no good for teeth like you when you're not sugar free, don't you fucking look at me, chicks most evening strewn to the wayside, kids won't even use you for play fights, you know what your problem is, you let people walk all over you, you need to man the fuck, you need to man the fuck up stick, and fatter you sock bitch, if I threw a party with some snackies and some drinks, invited just a whole bunch of lads and then one chick, I'd have a way better shot at mac in the slot with pandering boxfizz you arrogant dumb prick, I hate all you soft drink pussies, you think you're the best of all of them, well let me tell a story then, now back in year three I had this clever awesome friend, he asked me not to use his real name, so let's just call him Ben, we were kicking it since we met up at the Redding North Accretion in school, he was popular with every baller there, in mass science English he was head of all the sets, yeah the teachers like the fucker, but we'd never call him pet, because the ladies loved him too and he had sex before his 10th, but that all changed when he got into Fanta, and he let it warp his head, he couldn't stop using it like Jesse on the meth and it turned him into a dick and he lost next to all his friends, his girls started cheating, and when he saw the text of that Breppy Horrid centre, Kevin, Paul and Glenn, it left him all depressed, he drank Fanta for weeks, he got black in his teeth and now he'll never walk again, he's a pathetic corporate mess, I wish you every sort of death, I hope a leopard mourns you next, so you're forever short of breath, what are we doing man? Any porn that's French, and when I've stopped you, so there's no more metal form that's left, because I broke the tin, you'll know that this revenge is all for Ted, so now we just bat at the popular lads to death, and clash with the top of the battleheads, now that we're back and we're chopping off rappers' heads, LADDER AND MORRISON BAG are next! That was Shuffle Tea and Marlowe, now we're back to the battle, round number one is on FANTASTIC, let's go! Oh and I'm talking!