 the church fathers told me glad that you made it mother mary must have guided you and i was thinking to myself what all right guys welcome back to the channel if you're new my name is bobby guys first and foremost thank you everybody that reached out after my last video it was absolutely beautiful to see we had many atheists we had new ages we had jews even masonic jews if i remember correctly and moreover we had many muslims of course in the comment section it was absolutely beautiful to see a very interesting exchange of ideas of course we had many haters as well and let me address you quickly you guys are really like the Pharisees man that text said that that book said that you're not a christian i still identify as a christian however i do have issues with certain practices within the church and with certain practices that people do practice to this very day however as i said already i'm not here to debunk orthodoxy if you agree with everything within orthodoxy that is amazing beautiful this is your path go it straight done deal however i'm always honest i cannot pretend to believe something if i do not i'm still identified as a christian however there are three things within orthodoxy it simply didn't resonate with me any longer guys if you follow this channel you know i went to mount artos mount artos is essentially the mecca of orthodoxy if you will it was over there that i participated in church service three times daily i really got to know the orthodox tradition however three major things of orthodoxy simply didn't connect with me didn't connect with my soul if you will the first and foremost kissing icons i already know about kissing icons because i grew up in orthodox household and therefore i saw my mother do it kissing the icons in church it never made any sense to me and it still doesn't i forced myself kissing the icons but it simply felt wrong that's all i can say it felt completely wrong it felt inauthentic i made myself do it in later church services on mount artos i even just gestured like this with a distance that i kissed the icon just to do it because it felt inauthentic i don't want to be inauthentic in church if it doesn't sit right with my heart it simply didn't it felt as if i was worshiping those icons and of course i know we orthodox we're not worshiping the icons we are venerating the icons but guys if you kiss those icons that is worship in my book i cannot see it any other way otherwise again i would have to pretend that i do not see it that way another thing was kissing the hand of the priest that felt so cultish so guru like to me similar to osho and all the other indian cults why would i worship yet again another man now we would say no we're not worshiping here we are simply respecting the elders but i can respect the man by shaking his hand i don't have to kiss his hand i never did that even on mount artos i gestured like this but i never actually kissed the hand of the priest because that simply is not me not at all i couldn't make myself do it it would be wrong in front of god because i wouldn't be congruent in front of god number three and this is the last major issue that i had but i'm going to talk about minor discrepancies as well the third and the last one is eating from the same spoon as 20 other guys and saying that that bread on the spoon is the flesh of christ and the wine is the blood of christ as i said kissing the hand already felt cultish but this cemented it for me i took part in the holy eucharist but i couldn't believe it oftentimes i would find myself within the ceremony and asking myself hmm was the bread and the wine maybe something else back in the day maybe a mushroom who knows honestly i was asking myself was it really just bread and wine and now supposedly the bread and the wine is really the flesh of christ not only symbolically but really the flesh of christ for us i mean obviously it was just bread and wine so how can it be the flesh of christ i had to make myself believe that again but ultimately i didn't believe it those are the three major discrepancies now i'm going to talk about little discrepancies as well for example when i made it to mount atos and i went to the monastery s figmenu which was an absolutely amazing holy spiritual place the church fathers told me glad that you made it mother mary must have guided you and i was thinking to myself what that feels so wrong why would have mother mary guided me that was god after all there was god all along i was guided by god i knew god i had god in my heart i experienced god not only during the time on atos but before that after that i wasn't communion with god during my silent prayers and i know controversial topic during mushroom experiences as well i know that many religious folks don't want to hear it and i haven't touched mushrooms in over two years but i cannot discard my experiences during those mushroom experiences i had many encounters with god and even after that in a sober state i had encounters with god again and god was always the perfect unity actually the only perfect unity there is there is nothing like him absolutely nothing i can say with confidence that i encountered god that's it i know that many won't believe it and that is fine this is why i always say go and see for yourself many people will tell me what they believe based on another man's belief i don't care for that at all zero i want your experience that would be interesting do you have an experience we saw that with veganism especially people talk about show me the studies i don't care i really don't i want to see how it works for you what you do you as an individual what do you do how do you eat how do you practice tell me about it that is what fascinates me i want to see real life results anyways that being said i had encounters with god god is pure god is holy god is love god is a unity god is the absolute absolute beauty encompassed no division at all no duality at all non-dual really amazing and now here i was listening to men telling me that god is a trinity that in order to receive god i have to eat bread and wine in order to receive god i should kiss icons in order to receive god i should kiss an old man's hand i can't i absolutely can't and that's the truth and honestly i'm really really happy with it i'm happy as i haven't been in a long time i really mean this because finally i can return to my heart and finally i can connect with my god again and be happy and listen to god and not to other men one last comment to the haters and then i'm gonna wrap this thing up honestly guys ask yourself why do you care so much if somebody else has a different opinion than you it is hilarious to me to see it just shows how little self-respect you have it just shows how little trust you have in yourself it's hysterical honestly it is such a sign of weakness first and foremost if you would love your life you wouldn't care at all what bobby is doing here that's it secondly if you would have half a brain left you would simply click the video off that's that but no you can't and you're not convinced in your own beliefs that's it because they are not your own beliefs you adapted beliefs from other men and because you're not convinced of those beliefs and those convictions you want force them upon me you don't even know me for you i'm just digital on a screen but you want me that digital character to believe what you think you believe this just shows how weak you are all right but ending this video on a positive note again thank you so much everybody it was really amazing to exchange comments with you i'm really grateful and i'm filled with love honestly to have such a beautiful community on my channel it's absolutely amazing i love people i really do i love people of all walks of life i love different religions i love different cultures i love different races i just love life it's absolutely beautiful thank you so much and this is it for today's video if you liked it leave it the thumbs up if no leave it the thumbs down i can see it but most people can't see it because youtube deactivated it anyways if you want to support this channel all the links are in the description box thank you so much for your ongoing support from the bottom of my heart honestly it's amazing and as always guys may god bless you all much love and peace