 Okay problematic question today on the virginity issue get lots of people writing in about she's no longer a virgin She's lost her virginity. I want to understand from you. What is this sentence? She has lost her virginity mean to you. Does it mean that it's somebody who's had penetrative sex? They're no longer a virgin. What about if she's fingered herself down there? Is she still a virgin or what about if her partner a male partner has fingered her down there? They've not had penetrative sex, but he's definitely put his fingers inside her vagina Does that mean that she's lost her virginity or is she still a virgin? What about if she's used sex toys, but all by herself? Is she still a virgin? If losing your virginity is to push something up your vagina What about if you're using a tampon and if virginity is about the hymen breaking then what if she's been riding a bicycle all her life? You know, there's so much angst so much pressure so much weight put on this idea of a girl being a virgin I think it's important that we first figure out what that word means in our own head