 President of the American Creativities Association, which is bringing you the live show for today called The Creative Life. Our guest today is Virginia Sullivan and the topic is Discovery Your Creative Center. With me is my co-host and the chairperson of the American Creativity Association, Darlene Boyd and Darlene Nose who will be introducing Virginia. Darlene, hi. Hi, hello, hi Phyllis and hello, Virginia. Welcome to The Creative Life. It's my pleasure this afternoon to introduce to you Virginia Sullivan. Virginia Sullivan has been a career management consultant for several years and in that role, she works with people helping them to go through the process of uncovering and discovering the creative source within oneself. We're going to do something a little bit different today. We are going to take our viewers and ourselves to the mount, to the top of the mount metaphorically that is. So at this point, I'm going to introduce you to Virginia and Virginia will help us with Phyllis' assistance to get moving on, basically she's going to serve as our Sherpa throughout the next few minutes that we have and Phyllis, to you. Okay, Sherpa. Well, I'm very curious where you're going to take us today and why? Today we'll start the mountain to get, go up the mountain to our center of creativity which is in each one of us, but oftentimes it's a process to access it so that it can play a role in your life. We're going to start today at base camp and then we're going to up climbing the mountain, the 10,000 foot, the 20,000 feet and then the peak to climb down and then landing. So that's where we're going today, okay? Okay, so with the end of this half hour, we hope that we will reach our creative center. That's the goal. All right. Well, I know you have several walks of life, Virginia and you do take people for years, you've taken them into their creative center in order to find their calling in life, their work, their application, their vocation. And I'm wondering what happens at base camp or when you take someone there, what do you do to prepare them if you're starting with their creative impulses? That's what we really like to learn about. Okay, well, I mean, just a little background. Initially, something usually happens in someone's life to kind of ignite that and usually there's a dissatisfaction in life and we often call it the new way. So with that, here's the process we go through. In the base camp, the base camp is about preparation. It's about getting ready to go up to the mountain. It's about discarding things that aren't essential to get up the mountain, to make it as easy to get up there as possible. In the work that I do with clients, we talk about coming up with kind of an ideal plan as far as once you access your center of creativity, then how is that going to influence the rest of your life? So we want to clear out everything that's going to keep us from locating that center of creativity. So oftentimes that, you know, one of the things I suggest is to brainstorm with yourself, medication, journaling, journaling, to really get in touch with your center, you know, what are the things that I love to do? You know, what would my life look like if I could have an ideal life? And so journaling assists with that. A big part of journaling is the, what I call the stream of consciousness writing, just writing whatever comes up, no judgment, just, you know, see what, just asking yourself, continually asking the question, what would my life look like if I loved what I was doing? I loved, you know, where I was, all of the different aspects. Medication is very effective with that as well. Because again, it forces us to kind of clear out all the sounds around us and the distractions around us so that we can really, again, focus because we want to go into our stuff. So other things to get rid of the past and not to be weighing us down as we go up the mountain, any time we suffer a loss in life, whether it's the death of someone, whether it's loss of a job, whether it's, you know, loss of a relationship of any kind, there's a, you have to go through the fire stages of grieving. And I see so many clients who haven't done that and they get stuck in one of the stages. And the different stages of grieving are number one, the denial, the stop. You know, something's happened and it's like, wow, you know, I can't believe this has happened. I had a client one time come into me and he had been with this company for 31 years. He was never had an issue ever. This came from, you know, out of the blue that he got laid off and he was in my office in deer, you know, and it was that shock, it was that denial, you know. And so then we move into anger. We get very angry about it, you know, and underneath that anger is church, you know, because it's, there's a lot of pain associated with that. And so we react angrily. Then we go into the bargaining stage. Well, what if I did something different, you know, kind of maybe I can bring it back. Or whatever, you know, and then, then after that, and these all by the way, aren't nice and tidy. You're kind of going in and out of them, you know, different, different levels. Then we go into depression and then acceptance, you know, and acceptance doesn't mean to like it, but it means that you accept it. So all of this, we like to get that all figured out before we start the time to find our creative senses. Virginia, while we're still in base camp, may I ask you, you mentioned journaling and meditation. Is there, are there different forms you would, you also had mentioned stream of consciousness as one form of journaling. Are you able to suggest some other forms for us or that are maybe more effective one or the other? Well, I think it depends on the person, you know, what's going to be the most effective for the person. As far as meditation, you know, any type of meditation works that, you know, where you get rid of the distractions, get quiet, kind of go with it. But as far as writing, you know, some stream of consciousness works for some people. Others who tend to be very organized, you know, will, will, you know, be very precise. And, you know, it works better for them if they make lists of those things that they love to do. You know, so it's going to kind of depend on what works for you, what's the most effective way for you to, you know, get through, get through the, the, the, the distractions and get into a place where you've got a good idea that, you know, this, this is what I, this is what I love to do. Yeah. This is where I would like to be. This is where I would like my life to look, to look like. I would point it to falling in love, you know, when you hit your feet, creative center, you know, it's like, oh yeah, you know, I mean, and I see it with my big smiles on their faces, lots of energy around it, you know, when you're in love, you're like, when I tell the world, you know, you can't wait to get up and out, you know, and so it's that same kind of energy, excitement, you know, yes, this is what I was looking for, you know, and, and you can just see it on people's faces. Yeah. What difficult is it for you as a coach or as the leader, if that person, if your client walks and really does not take your suggestion, really says, no, I don't want to write anything. I'm not a meditator. How do you approach that? Well, I mean, number one, they've got to want it, you know, they've got to want to make the changes in order to make their life better, you know, and because I can't force them to do that. And so, you know, we get, we talk about it. I mean, oftentimes people get blocked because of the fear, you know, is fear of the unknown and life has been pretty comfortable and that's a huge block, that fear and they're afraid to kind of move on. That we talk about, you know, if they, if they're obstinate and they flat, just don't want to do it, period. Well, then there's not a lot you can do in that situation, but in situations where the fear is blocking them, you know, people have game about what happened, people, you know, have a myriad of emotions going on around it. And so my job is to help them process that. Do you see a fear of failure in the clients? I'm sorry, can I see that again? Do you see a fear of failure when you mentioned it? Oh, 100%. Yeah, absolutely. Fear of failure, fear of the unknown, you know, I'm not sure I can do it, you know, kind of don't want fear to be fast, you know, going in and it's really going, you know, so yeah, there's a lot of, that's the biggest, is the fear. But oftentimes, you know, people are embarrassed with where they are. If there's a lot of shame attached, especially in a job lot, a lot of shame and, you know, and definitely the stages of grieving, the anger that, you know, everything else. So my job as their surpa is to help them through that process. All right, Ms. Sherpa. Phyllis. Well, a couple of things. You're talking about the inward life that sets the intention for their outward life. Dirty. And I know you've been dealing with a lot of people this year going through COVID, which are circumstances beyond their control. So no doubt they're having to navigate the grief that's happening through their personal circumstances in the context of the larger one. And I don't know if you want to speak more to grief in the five stages of grief, because I think we've got that. But I do wonder about what do you do every day? You know, what do you do to get started now? You're ready to go, you've got the grief behind you. What's your next stage up the mountain? Ready to go up the mountain both. So the second stage is to start the client, one foot in front of the other. Now, hopefully you have your list of what the component of what you would like your life to be. You've got that, you've meditated about that. So now the big job is gonna be number one, visualizing it every single day, because, you know, that really sets in. I have two examples of that, quick examples. One of which is I have outside at my front door, I have a little ceramic dog that somebody gave me. Just years ago they gave it to me and I've got it outside at my front door. And about eight or nine years ago I got another dog. I was given a dog because somebody couldn't keep it. So shortly after I got the dog, I'm coming in the door one day, I looked down at that dog, the ceramic dog. It looks like, just like the dog at that. So, you know, it's like an unconscious visualization. And I have a friend who, same thing happened with it, with her cat, that her grandson drew a picture of a cat and then several years later, and she had done a surgery several years later, her cat looks like that. So, you know, visualization is very strong. It's a very strong sub-process. So I suggest that people do that every day, look at the list, kind of just see what that's gonna look like in their lives. And then, you know, the biggest thing is just put one foot in front of the other, just start to climb. I think I've heard that, you know, elite athletes visualize they're executing their task perfectly. And then they step in, then they can imagine stepping into that role. So let's say I've done this and I'm ready to get, what takes me to the 10,000 foot level? Well, the 10,000 foot level, you know, this is an assessment, okay? How am I doing? And there's a lot of fear there, a lot of emotion. I tell people that the biggest issue that we have when we're going through that process is between our ears because our heads are, and everybody's heads is the same way, are talking to us. The ego doesn't want us to succeed this, you know? And so we've got a lot of fear, we don't wanna go there. And this is where the fear surfaces again. And that's a powerful, powerful motion. You know, all of us are more comfortable maintaining the status quo, you know? And so this requires a lot of courage, you know, to get up and do it. And, you know, and you just have to put one front and front of the other and do it, you know? This is where a lot of self-talk comes in, because you're gonna have tremendous, negative self-talk going on. Then you gotta counter that. You gotta counter that with the positive self-talk as well. You know what you remind me of? Myself, very much included, is I think a lot of us think that we're not the creative type, you know? Why would I join the American Creativity Association? And they often associate that with the creative arts, you know, the arts and crafts. And that is one wonderful section of the American Creativity Association. But also being creative in your walk of life. And what you've taken us through so far, getting to the 10,000 foot level through visualization and stages of grief, sounds like something anyone can do. To, you know, on this journey to accessing our creative center, you're giving us what sound like very practical tools that are affirming to me that I'll just take it one step at a time. Exactly, exactly. Which is how we need to do anything, right? Anything new, just start moving forward, you know? And this is one where you're gonna take two steps up, one step back, three steps up, two steps back, you know? So it's not necessarily a very clean one step in front of the other clean process. Because, again, there's a lot of resistance, you know? I think anybody can do it. Absolutely anybody can do it. Well, hey, it sounds like when Einstein and others in the lab have a mistake and then something breaks because they've been doing it every day, we're told that they understand what that break or what that false result actually has added to their body of knowledge. There you go. So, and you say, do it every single day, whatever our visualization is, it will have its own dialogue with our inner expressive cell. And this, again, this is not nuclear science. Exactly. I've never quite understood creativity in that way that you're expressing it today, that it's having a dialogue with yourself. Yeah, yeah. And you don't need to wait for it to hit you over the head. And, you know, because we all have a creative center. And, you know, some centers of creativity are harder to find than others, you know? I find that people who are a linear tend to have a little more trouble getting to this because they see everything linear and this is more about the circular parts of our life, you know? And so, but everybody's got it, you know? And it can be obscured, you know, by many things, but if we go through the process, we can discover it. You know, it's like somebody who's had a very linear job, you know, like the CPA or, you know, CFO or something like that, and then, you know, retires and takes up painting or something, you know? And finds that they're good at, you know, that's something they never access before. Wow. What, well, what gets us to the next level? That 20,000 foot ether sphere. Okay. So the 20,000 foot level, again, is an assessment, you know, how am I doing? And this is when the tug of war starts because, you know, you can see the peak, but, you know, you're still doubting yourself to a certain degree, but you're also, well, maybe I can do it, you know? I mean, I could see it, I've gone this far, you know, maybe I can do it. And so this is pivotal as far as, you know, we've got two choices here, either stop or go up. You know, there's no, go to the peak because now there are no more levels that kind of go through. So the goal is in sight now to why I want to actually put one foot in front of the other and try to get there. Yeah. So I'm thinking, as we're talking about reaching the peak and having that goal, for so many of us, and I suspect when you're working as a coach for your clients, we managed to have the confidence and we're almost to that peak. And then we're playing with the metaphor today, of course, of the peak and chances are the peak has a little ice on it. So we slip and fall. So how do you communicate that confidence to your client to give them that boost to say it's all right? It's all right that you've done a great job thus far and you can do it again. Exactly. Well, and a big part of my job is, well, people is to be a cheerleader, you know, is to just hope people be aware that, you know, this is available to them and flipping is part of the process, you know. It's that, you know, three steps up, two steps back, you know, and I think I said in the very beginning, this isn't necessarily a pretty process, you know, and it's not precise. Flipping and falling, you know, we oftentimes learn more from our falls in life than we do if life clicks along. And so, yeah, that's how I help them through that process. Yeah. Just to continue with our little metaphor of the day that we're playing with, do you think in the creative process that one is more creative with the support of others that are taking on the same task? We're using Base Camp, we're using reaching the peak. And when there is a Base Camp often, we know that there are those times that are probably for safety, better to do this process with others. And certainly if you're going to slip and fall, the others will be there for you. How do you approach someone, perhaps that doesn't have that support team, or they're on their own completely in isolation? What strategies do you bring forth for them? Well, one of the things that I talk about initially is with the client is exactly about the support system. What kind of a support system do you have around you? Because in life, you've got to have some support helping you through. One of the things we do is identify, you know, because people don't necessarily have family around, people don't necessarily, you know, people who've worked for long periods of time, their support or their colleagues, you know, but in this type of a situation, the colleague is not going to be necessarily the best support can be, you know, can be helpful. But so we spend some time identifying support people in their lives. And this is, you know, they may not be anybody local, but one of the things is, you know, we become like the people that we're around, right? And so identifying, you know, people who are in, who are doing what you want to do, you know, I'm reaching out to them to be supportive. I always tell people, steer clear of the negative one, you know, incorporate the positive one because they're always going to be negative people in the world and you need the positive people who are going to be helping you through the process. So we all have some sort of support somewhere somehow if we just really take a look at every area of our lives. You know, we've got, what have we involved it? You know, what kind of friends do we have? You know, are we involved in any organization? Can we join organizations of people who do what we want to do or whatever? So there's always a way to bring people like that into your life. Well, thank you. And now let's get you to the peak. Can we wanna see what that whole process feels like before we have to come down again? Okay, all right. So the peak, it's like, you know, again, it's like, I did it, you know, my gosh, I did it, you know? And disbelief and excitement, elation, you know? And this is kind of the falling in love start, like, I found it, you know, and so again, there's just such a shift in one personality when they find it, but tremendous elation and excitement that they've tapped into it. Now, what do I need to do to make this happen? Yeah, probably their health is by now starting to improve. Their sleep, you know, at any, I'll call it addictive behavior. I don't wanna be a downer and I'm not an analyst, but, you know, kind of just really focusing on this new creative outlet in their life and what is it? What do you do, you know, before enlightenment, enlightenment, chop wood and carry water. Now we're after enlightenment. Are we back to chop wood and carry water? Are you gonna help us come down that mountain in our remaining four minutes? I wanna make sure we get the full. Okay, all right, so we'll talk a little faster here. Yeah, okay, but yeah, so now down the mountain, you know, what do we need to do to incorporate the, you know, this creative center into the life that we wanna create, that we wanna have? And, you know, which involves, as I said, it's, you know, finding other people who are doing what we wanna do, assessing like, do I need education? Do I need what additional training could I use if necessary? The biggest thing is to try to be around people and situations that are doing what you wanna do or reflect what you wanna do. Volunteering is a great idea. Organization, you know, any way that you can incorporate this into your life by being around what you're looking for. So that's so interesting. So this entire journey that you've described, we haven't even begun the creative life that we're imagining for ourselves. So for those watching, this entire process up and down the mountain has been within us all along. And it's, when you get back down, that's when you volunteer or apprentice with somebody or quit your day job or whatever you do. I love that you're giving strategies and flishing out this creative process. You don't need any money for it. You don't really need anyone else. You have it all within you. And I think your guideposts though are helpful in the road signs. That's really interesting. So where do we go next? Are we landing? Now we land, you know, and so we found a creative center and we're doing those things that are necessary to, you know, make it happen for us. And I talk about initially when people are unsatisfied, there's kind of that internal grumbling within it. It's like, you know, life isn't good kind of thing. And that all goes away. There's just a sense of calm, a piece of enjoyment, of happiness, like we're on our way again. It's like people refer to it as a new lease on like, you know, kind of an unsettling within it. You know, that again, some things just not right, you know, things bother us, you know, just not comfortable, not happy. So Virginia, what you bring to mind for me in a Hawaiian sense is we call this pahana. At the end of the day, we're ready to rest. And that's really where you took us here. And so at this pahana time, you can just enjoy the fact that we've taken this journey. And I really want to thank you very much for coming to us and others can look at your website, VirginiaSoloVan, is it dot com? It's actually a power connection. Okay, powerconnections.com. And our viewers can turn into accreatively.org and find out more about your work there. And Darlene, Boyd, thank you very much for joining us on Irvine. And so from our family to yours, Mahalo and Aloha.