 Hi, welcome to Arlington's community update today. I'm here at the children's room with Liz Cohen. Thanks for coming out today Liz Why don't yeah, why don't you introduce yourself first? Hi, I'm Liz Cohen. I'm the executive director of the children's room in Arlington I've been here about two years. It'll be two years in January and I'm just so honored and thrilled to be the executive director And I'm excited to tell more people about it Excellent and I'll have you give us a little bit of a description of the children's room Let us know what you guys are all about how you're aiming to benefit the community So the children's room is started on the idea that no one should have to grieve alone The central focus of our work is kids who are ages three and a half to 18 who have had a parent or a sibling who died We know in Massachusetts alone. There are 77,000 grieving kids. So that means one in 17 kids is Dealing with the death of a parent or a sibling and often they feel like they're the only one So we have created this movement across the country Looking at child bereavement and thinking about ways that we can create safe space for people to come together and Support each other. Yeah, that was perfect. This this is a really great organization I've I've lost people when I was older and you know, of course, that's tough But I can't even imagine what it's like to have to go through that as a young child So it's excellent that you guys are really giving back to the community with the space And why don't you talk a little bit about the services and support groups that you offer? So the children's room I don't want to just start by saying we never charge any of our families for any of our services We know that when there's a death loss it often comes with financial hardships So all of our services are free of charge The core of our work is a peer support group. So we have peer support groups six times a week that meet every other week It's a way for families to come as a unit And then the parents are taken care of and their kids are taken care of the kids are divided up by their developmental age and the parents are able to sit with other parents who either Had a spouse partner co-parent die or another group for parents who had a child who died The kids are upstairs and hopefully we'll be able to show you some of those spaces And they're with other peers who've had similar death losses And these groups meet throughout the school year People stay typically about two or three years and usually come to us within a year of the death But we find that some people come back and forth. Some people come right away. Some people can't come for years after What we've also learned in the last few years is that grief is not one size fits all and our programming can't be that way So we developed a couple of additional programs to really help our families The first is family night, which happens once a month. We actually just had one last night And it's a way for the family to stay together as a unit and do an art-based memory project And we invite extended family so we know when a death occurs. It's not just a nuclear family It's also cousins and aunts and grandparents and neighbors and nannies and kind of who else is part of a family So those are lovely Those are once a month and we have about six to eight families at a time and they stay together as a unit So that's a new program is family night We also realized that parenting is really difficult and the issues around parenting, especially when a co-parent or spouse or partner has died is especially challenging so we created an eight-week psycho-ed didactic group where Parents can come in talk about their struggles as a parent and we can help give some tools to expand their toolbox So things around how to communicate communicate about with the person who died How to continue with discipline how to navigate those really hard times throughout the year either death Anniversaries or birthdays, but also the holidays are tricky Mother's Day is rotten for some people of Father's Day So those groups happen both in the fall and the spring And then we've also expanded to do a lot more work with teens We know that adolescence is a time that's difficult and being other is really hard And being other because you are someone who had a parent or sibling die can be especially difficult So we have monthly social activities where teens can come together They meet here in the house and then they'll go rock climbing or a cooking class or an art based activity or a broon's game And they're able to just be who they are So they're not the person whose brother died there Liz, right? So they have this thing in common, but they can go and be social with other teens. All right, that's incredible You know, I loved how you said grieving isn't one size fits all that almost seems like it should be a little tagline for the children's room because hearing about how many the various different programs that you have for people of all ages you have so many different ways to help people Both grieve with their own families and grieve with a community of others who have dealt with this problem But that's great to hear So next I'll have you talk about the memories walk I hear you just wrapped that up this past weekend. Do you want to give us a little info on that? Every year we the Sunday after Columbus Day, so marker calendar for next year October 18th We gather as a community at Town Hall and we as a group we have T-shirts and ways to do memories and celebrate the person who died. We have photos up on the on the screen and we walk together to remember our folks and It's a dual purpose one It's to raise most importantly to raise awareness and gather the sense of community And to also have visibility within Arlington, which is a community that has been so good to us And secondly, it's it is a fundraiser I go back to my constant thing which is that we make a Concrete promise to never charge any families for our work We started as a very small organization We were in the basement of the church across from Whole Foods now with a little tiny budget and Now we're an over a million dollar organization And so we need to be able to support all of our programming and services Yeah, that's that's amazing. So those of you who are watching even if you don't necessarily have any involvement with the children's room It's really something to consider because this great organization Maybe it hasn't helped you, but it could have helped someone that you know it could have helped your neighbor your friend So definitely keep that in mind And are there any ways that the members of Arlington can volunteer to get involved with the children's room? There actually are because again, we're Such a lean organization. We only have 11 staff here And serve at least a hundred families every year within our house And we're upwards of almost 900 people that we serve through various services here at the house We are very grateful and very dependent for volunteers Every night that we have a peer support group. We have one staff member and about 12 to 15 program facilitators So that is our number one way that people volunteer So the program Volunteer training happens twice a year. It's a pretty intensive experience And we do that one because people need to work out their own kind of grief journey and their lost history And two we want to do some real didactic training. So it's a 35 hour training. It's over two weekends We just finished the fall one, but the information on the January training is on our website So I would encourage your viewers if there has ever thought to themselves Oh, I've always wanted to do that with the children's room We're always looking for volunteers and it's a really I think one of the best volunteer experiences out there We also for anyone who's driven by the house. We have a phenomenal garden So if anyone out there has a green thumb We always have volunteers coming in. It's a great corporate group So if people ever have like a corporate outing that they want to do like a volunteer day That's a great way to come in help clean out our garden plant weed We have school groups that come in also and do some cleaning in the house So we have a group every year from Belmont Hill that comes in there was a teacher there who I think his dad Died when he was younger and he gets a group of young men to come in every year and just clean the house, which is amazing So that's another way to volunteer Finally I would say You know, we have a really amazing board with committee. So if anyone has board experience right now We're actually looking for someone who has financial experience Our longtime amazing treasurer Steve Andrew who is well known by a lot of people in Arlington He is finishing up his second term with us So we're looking for someone who has that type of experience if you have any other ideas Call us and we have people that have filed and We always have someone from Arlington High School do their senior project with us So we're we're lean like I said and we're always happy to have volunteers. So thank you for asking Yeah, that's great to hear So it sounds like you guys have sort of a nice symbiotic Relationship with the community going on you're helping Arlington Arlington's helping you So that's another thing to keep in mind if you're looking for An experience to volunteer this would be a great place They would really appreciate the help and how can people get in contact with you if they want to volunteer or if they maybe need to Utilize your services I always send people to our website. It's it. There's really good information on there. It's children's room Org Within there you can reach out and our numbers on there our emails on there Most people can just call our main line, which is seven eight one six four one Four seven four one and leave a message and someone will give them a call back When a parent who is dealing with a child who had a loss Wants to reach out. They have to call the line themselves So often I get this question of like oh a neighbor might say oh them, you know, I know this dad died next door I don't know what to do. Can you call them? We really want people to come towards us when they're ready It would be pretty jarring to get a phone call out of the blue children's room calling You know, we're we're one of those clubs that people are really glad that we're here But hope they never have to use us But we're also can be a great resource if someone is a professional social worker or a teacher and wants more information So yeah, our website our main line and just info at children's room or g great ways to contact us All right, perfect. Well, that's all the questions that I have for you Thank you very much for meeting with us today and giving us all that great information and to the community of Arlington keep this service in mind because Like she said you hope you don't need it, but if you ever do it's always here for you So thank you for that Liz. It's great to meet you