 Hey, Psych2Goers, and welcome back to another video. Thank you so much for all of the love and support that you've given us. Here at Psych2Go, our mission is to make content on mental health and self-care more accessible to everyone. Now, let's begin. Everyone at some point leaves relationships, jobs, and friendships. Sometimes it ends up being a blessing because they weren't right for us anyway. But what if you can't move on or get over it? What gives? Is this just you not being able to get it together? Or is there something a little more sinister at play? Unhealed relationship trauma is far deeper than you being stressed or relationship challenged. It's being unable to move on because of your previous relationship. Before we begin, we want to let you know the goal of this video is to help you understand relationship trauma and possibly how this may apply to you. With that being said, here are seven signs you may have unhealed relationship trauma. 1. Annoying physical symptoms Do you feel completely drained after a long-term relationship ended? A study shows unresolved trauma can make normal aches and pains worse. This seems to stem from trauma putting your body on constant high alert, which is due to the activation of your physiological fight, flight, or freeze response. A toxic relationship is stressful for your mind and body. Your body's stress response was only meant to last for a short amount of time, but as several experts have noted, putting your body under stress for long periods of time can lead to increased inflammation, arthritis, heart attacks, weakened immune systems, and chronic pain. 2. Your body and mind feel disconnected Since you and your ex broke up, do people tell you that you have your head in the clouds? Have you started feeling like your life was some movie you were watching from the outside when the relationship started getting bad? These are features of disassociation or feeling detached from reality. A study noted people who seek help from trauma often report feelings of disassociation. Disassociation involves the disruption of your perceptions, memory, processing, and emotions. These include acting or feeling as though a traumatic event is still occurring. 3. Your brain works differently After ending a toxic or traumatic relationship, did you notice getting a lot of brain fog, forgetfulness, or racing thoughts? This is because the stress from a toxic relationship and your body's response to the stress is ongoing. The stress hormones adrenaline and cortisol were not meant to be in your system longer than a few minutes at a time. Constantly having them in your system changes the way parts of your brain function. So you're probably going to notice you can't concentrate. Your memory stinks. You feel out of control or have racing thoughts. And you have a hard time figuring out how to feel. You get frustrated or angry easily. 4. Major trust issues, even with people you know and love. Have you put up walls around you? Is it hard to believe in others now? In addition to changing the way parts of your brain functions, the trauma brought on by a toxic relationship messes with your ability to feel safe with another person. This anxiety might cause your mind to come up with every possible doomsday scenario you can in order to protect yourself. As a result, you doubt even those who only want your good and have done you no wrong. 5. You might pick fights or engage in risky business. Unresolved trauma sufferers constantly feel on edge. So they sometimes behave in risky ways to seek sensations, aka get a rush, as a way to feel like they have control or to get a break from trauma symptoms, such as replaying the trauma, depression, or overanalyzing their faults. Emotional flashbacks and all the biochemical changes created by toxicity makes you feel like you're still in the toxic relationship. You feel like you have to fight to survive, even if your present situation is perfectly safe. People who experienced this association as a result of trauma are more likely to lash out aggressively than those who are not prone to this association. 6. A constant sense of shame. Wow, I'm a horrible person, or why didn't I see it before? I'm so stupid for staying and I'm such a doormat. These are the common thought processes for those who have lingering relationship trauma. They blame themselves for things not working out and feel ashamed. The big difference here boils down to guilt and shame. Guilt means you feel bad about something you did. Shame means you feel bad about who or what you are. Too much shame or guilt can not only be paralyzing, but is also associated with trauma. Research has shown toxic shame can make the mental, emotional, and physical symptoms of trauma much worse. And 7. You react physically to emotional triggers. Have you ever heard a song or seen a picture that made you feel nostalgic? When you have unhealed relationship trauma, triggers that seem normal take a much darker turn. These triggers become more intense over time as the memories associated with the trauma become more intrusive. Researchers believe these physical reactions are due to the amygdala and the neurotransmitter acetylionine in the stress response. A physical reaction to a trauma trigger might look like shortness of breath and sweating when your boss questions you. Certain songs or phrases give you anxiety or you feel sick when you smell certain foods. Maybe you start getting chest pains or shaking when people innocently bring up your old line of work or your ex's favorite restaurant. Trauma is deeper than being stuck in the past. The symptoms of unhealed relationship trauma can hurt you. But by taking the time to learn about what you've experienced, you can start figuring out how you can start healing. Your healing journey may not go in a straight line and it certainly won't be perfect and that's fine. Just as long as you keep putting one foot in front of the other, could you relate to any of these signs? Have you noticed these in someone around you? Do let us know in the comments below. Also, remember to like and share this video with those who might benefit from it. Subscribe to Psych2Go for more content and as always, thanks for watching.