 Welcome to Wild World News Welcome back with some wild ass World News I can't believe this shit, this has got to be a hoax But I've seen crazier shit, so who knows I went to Snopes and I couldn't find that annoying So, it says a 31 year old woman Has found love with a tree named Tim How they know his name is Tim, did he tell him that? And it says it's the best sex she's ever had Well, he's always up Emma McCabe says she's fallen head over heels With the sturdy popular tree And she's happy ever And she's happy after a string of disastrous relationships She also says the sex with the tree is the best she's ever had with anyone McCabe who has serious unlucky relationships with men Says she's planning to marry the tree Although her family won't talk about it That's the picture in this magazine Is it real? I don't know It's believed Emma's bizarre attraction to the tree May be a result of a condition called dendrophilia Where a person is sexually attracted to a tree I have to look this up and make sure it's real Dendrophilia, I come on now You know, and I saw something weird dude Married a damn mannequin, a life-sized doll The love of trees, look at that Okay, there it is Okay, people are sexually attracted or aroused by trees But fuck is with people Saw something dude married a mannequin or a life-sized doll And what the fuck is it with people And I only see it done with women so far Where they're so damn lonely And beaten down by life and relationships Desperate for marriage That they marry their motherfucking self Come on now I mean, come on now You've just been out shopping at shop right And seen a couple together and be like Well, hell, if they can get married I can get married I mean, for real ladies, you're gonna marry your fucking self God damn, I mean Ugh See Mary, how does she Does she just rub up, you know Does she just rub up against it Or does it have low branches that she Ugh I don't even want to think about it Anyway, post your comments down below Let me know what you think of this foolishness And fuckery in the wild world of news One million subscribers