 Welcome to the 21 convention podcast. My name is Steve Mayer and I'm your host of today's episode today We have Nick sparks an amazing guy and in this in this podcast We do an interview that gets really in depth. We talk about sex Sexuality his his speeches that he's given in the past But also some really intimate details on how to get more social how to be a better man and Both of our personal struggles that went into this equation. Don't forget to subscribe to the YouTube channel It's an easy click of the button and if you're watching this on social media, let's pass it on. Let's get into this interview All right here We are with Nick sparks at the 21 convention man. You just said something which was pretty cool He said this was the the one of the highlights of your year. Yes, man Tell tell me about it because we've talked a lot, but I haven't heard that. Oh All right, just the collection of people that's what I really love about it from the speakers I'm to the attendees. It's you know the speakers guys who I don't get to see guys So I don't get to hang out with who I have a lot in common in prior to this you had not met James Marshall James McLean Sasha. Oh, you hadn't met Sasha. No, it's a big personality all sorts of sock. I mean, yeah, yeah, yeah incredible inspirational And then also I know for myself and we talked to you got to experience it a little bit more because I'm like Going all over the place, but even the attendees What what was so like What was your first thought on it? I have some thoughts on it, but what really stood out, you know I've spoken at a few of these that are not the 21 convention and the crowd can be kind of a yeah You know guys who are just like really looking up there numbers. Yeah, or this and that but I mean this convention especially this year just the tracks men who are Awesome guys really looking to do like, you know the right thing and just looking to improve themselves in all areas of their lives Are pushing themselves and in every which way and I mean that's always inspiring to me Man, you know, this is what I I would say because there's always been a difference about the 21 convention and especially in what like the message that is produced but in this year you really saw the manifestation of speakers and attendees Going all in the same direction. It was just really cool, you know So everybody had the right mentality whether it had to do with diet bettering their lives I mean you just heard a different voicing of living a better life and you know the meaning of social I mean god dude the speeches. What was your favorite speech man? Um, socrates. Yeah I think he won It was awesome, but You know what I thought was so interesting was Every speaker especially guys that we see a lot, you know in the seduction industry and although you hadn't met Sasha or James very familiar with them everybody had a feeling of I Just want to give like everybody gave, you know, including your speech or we were talking about it just the pacing of it and the feeling of Hey, man, we're being we we love being social. We love connecting with people We do this because it's our passion, but we believe in humanity and let's just open it up And it was just so cool to see the different voicings of you know Sasha being Sasha You know James Marshall being James James of Clane yourself, you know, it was just a very very cool thing What are the transitions for you in this like that brought you to that Kind of level of giving and because for the past couple years. I really feel that you've opened up in a way that's I Don't know a very mellow calm Seductive expression of yourself like what transitions happen. Oh, I mean just growing up You're practicing what I preach instead of because yeah Any guy who's working in this industry I tell you you get into it because you're you're trying to figure stuff out for yourself You're trying to prove yourself on these lines as well and every single guy I work with I learned something new and I I'm going to be an example to people. I've got to internalize it I've got a you know to bring it myself and then with this event especially I always feel like I've got to bring my best Everybody else is Anthony always is and so just to kind of deserve to be on that stage with everybody else I've got to you know make sure that I'm resting as much as I can before my speech I'm giving as much as I can to the guys who who are all bringing everything. Yeah, got themselves Like I got to step it on and that that is something because speaking at the 21 This is something that you guys may not know is that it is so different because it's a different caliber in other Speaking events went for anything. It's like there's some riffraff It's kind of easy to give the top 10 roll out of bed hung over Don't shower. Hey guys 21 convention. Yeah, like to speak on a stage with yourself like to be around that or Any of the other speakers? There's some of the top guys in health some of the top guys in the world in fitness doctors Yeah MDs and I'm supposed to be like that's the crazy thing about like the guys of the seduction industry is we tend to be people that Just you know kind of go about life in this way and it was a philosophy major. Yeah. Hey, at least you went to school You know, I mean like a lot of us didn't but we're actually on stage with these like academics, you know after this we got We have to we have guys would be actually I just interviewed a guy with a PhD And we have another guy with a PhD and it's just such an interesting thing I think that's something that the 21th invention Anthony everybody involved in it has put out there that you know Living your life living your expression living what you're truly passionate about you can get to this expert level of You know spreading a good word. I mean is this happened for you? You know, we enter into the seduction industry and you can kind of go whatever way you want But had I not been involved with the speakers and the people that I met I wouldn't have transitioned into more of the thought in the mindset in the you know, even feelings I've I've passionate about seduction, you know What what's happened between the 2009 convention and In now man, well I've always kind of followed my own path when it comes to this sort of thing I've always been a figure things out on my own walk Whatever, you know, I ignore everything that else is out there and then really kind of think oh What do I believe is yeah is best even if all the other voices in the industry are saying something different Right at the time that is you they really were and so, you know I I feel that I was maybe leaning towards a message or a direction before it was more popular before it was more accepted Yeah, it was a big gamble. Yeah, big time for sure But then it's it's humbling when when Anthony starts kind of cutting out other people from the convention There's a lot of people that spoke that back then that right they butted heads when they weren't invited back And now it's just not crazy. It's really it's really just reaffirming It's really like I said humbling that and then also with you because you've I mean you're like super humble You're like totally down to earth, right? Just a dude. Yeah. No, I've got my own stuff to work on like everybody. Yeah Yeah, and so for yourself, you know, just kind of going along on this path And then all of a sudden your speech explodes man And the way that you handled it is even cooler because a lot of people they get a speech that takes off And it's like me me me finally finally. I'm validated, but for you. It's just like oh no, man That's not what it's about Wait, like that speech was released What a year year year and a half a year and a half Like what was your reaction to all that? Even people started emailing you or you're just like whoa this thing is going crazy I was as shocked as anyone Yeah, you know my speeches would tend to get as many views right as the the other guys in the convention and then that one just went went off at completely unexpected very very surprising and You know, I wasn't gonna walk in here this year with a big old fur coat and like sunglasses like mr. Big shot or anything For me it was it was it was validating in a way and that you know The stuff that I'm talking about the the way that I'm going about this stuff is what people want You know, they don't want the top 10 like best pickup line people are looking for something else So if anything it was just like a reaffirmation that I was going in the right direction But definitely at the same time not like oh, I've arrived now Yeah, but that you know, I've got a lot more work to do but at least I know that you know I'm doing it somewhat right I think it did say it did a service to everybody and even in the 21 convention with it's just Video feed has done that for everybody because marketing tells you you have to be this way and then you come along and it's like I mean There's other people with other speeches that are much more, you know marketing and then this totally organic like You do all the things that are quote-unquote wrong, right? And it's just so down to earth you you're just like, hey, you know, I'm Let me get centered, you know You started off the speech and you know feeling a little bit nervous and you just went into this dialogue about some very simple conversation and You know, you kind of did Part two to it this year, you know with the the whole how to be sexual element the continuation Yeah, the two speeches like you can't have one without the other really right comes to communicating Especially with women and then sexualities just as much as much of a natural expression Yeah, there's anything else and it needed to be said. So yeah, I got the opportunity It was really good man. I mean I I was in the back the room and you could feel it You know, and I think that was your your your point was to get into what's within you and not about the words Yeah, about the thoughts. Yeah, it's only gonna get in your life, you know, you said something when we were talking about the speech I You know when I work with guys one thing that I notice and man what I notice about myself I mean is when I fail at something how I react shows a window to what I need to work on or if I get rejected And they're two different things. I think like failure kind of relationship with yourself Rejected is you know other people and then if I'm around things that I don't like like if I'm like, oh man this person Great, you know, but what's that say about me? But I think also with how we deal with success, you know, and what did that teach you, you know, or what kind of It was validating in a way when you saw You know shoot man doing my things my own way because at the time like all these satellites of people that you probably weren't connected to You know may have been doing the right thing in the seduction to see the dating industry But you're kind of like alone with it. And when you started to get that success What did it show for you? Did it trigger any things that you needed to work on? Did it? It's like I said just mainly because I've had Conversations, I know plenty of marketers in this industry and you know when I was doesn't they were all telling me yo We need you need to do this This is how you and then they were right to a certain extent like if you want to make money Especially like this is what sells like yeah, and so this is what you need to be and I said back then that I get that I understand that this is where the money's at This is what people are buying and this is what you know gets their emotional selling juices going or whatever But I don't believe in it. I is a coach. Hmm. I know that if I taught that stuff and I just saw guys Basically being in the same place. They were I wasn't doing my job. Yeah, so I Yeah, I said I respect what you're saying and what you're doing But I just I can't do it. I have to do something else and maybe I'm crazy Maybe I'm gonna do it and a couple years later. I'm going to just you know be homeless or whatever have to get out of the industry Um But it's it's it's really nice. Yeah, no that's there are guys that do want something out There are guys that are tired of that message. Yeah, and so it's it's I won't say that that's the thing that that kept me Sticking around but it was such a strong message. Hmm that No, that that there are other people out there that don't just want the rest of the stuff that are looking for something different Man, cool. Cool. Hey, let's take a break for a short minute and we'll be right back with Nick Sparks